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Van Rosenberg (Completed 23 May)

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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 15 Jan)

Postby LittleBit » Fri Jan 18, 2008 4:32 am

OMG!

That update really was powerful ... you got the right amount of confusion (sort of reminiscent of when Angel regained his soul - well the feeling behind it at least).

Keep up the great work .. I'm really enjoying the story and how frequently you update! :D
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 15 Jan)

Postby Zampsa1975 » Fri Jan 18, 2008 5:51 am

Great update-y goodness... I really hope that old Abe doesn't start to physically torture Tara, mental torture is bad enough... I really hope that Giles is able soon "save" Tara from Abraham...

I really hope that Willow is able to differentiate vampTara without a soul and ensouled halfvampTara and forgive her...
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 15 Jan)

Postby diamondforever » Sat Jan 19, 2008 10:54 pm

Wowowowowowowowowow!!!

Okay, you are awesome. Like, awesome awesome awesome awesome. Awesome awesome awesome awesome awesome.

I'm too overwhelmed to form any more thoughts than this, so I will just say that I loved it. And my questions are done being asked (at least for now, and I know I've asked a lot), and I am just going to let you amaze me again with your next chapter.
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 15 Jan)

Postby Alcy » Mon Jan 21, 2008 3:03 pm

Zooey’s Bridge: Congrats on the dibsies.
It felt really important to continue with the separation between VampTara and Tara, since I’ve stressed that VampTara is a demon that inhabits the real Tara’s body…although things will of course change dramatically from now on as we have an ensouled demon who will be a little more like the Tara we know.
Glad you enjoyed the comeback of Tara’s soul, I didn’t want to get bogged down in all the detail, it was definitely much easier to switch to the aftermath and get right into the action.
There are a number of very difficult questions that the present situation has created but I really hope to be able to do them all justice over the next few chapters leading up to what should be an exciting finale…although we have a few chapters to go yet (8 at the last count although this does change as I write)

dlline: Hello to Diane minus the silliness!
Hey Alcy!
Tara really has some pretty nasty thing to come to grips with.

Yes, that sums it up quite nicely.
The dream sequence was intended to be a little hot, although I fear I am out of practice, having not written any smut for so long but I think it came out alright.
I still want her in my basement, soul or not.

Haha, I’m not sure which version would be preferable, the evil one that killed her lover or the ensouled one that is a little bit mad with grief?

taraslove:
[quoteAnd Abraham acts like he's sure that she's still not the real Tara Maclay, even though she has a soul[/quote]
I think Abraham might be aware of just what he has created in restoring her soul but he is so blinded by his vengeance that he will punish her regardless of what she now is. We’ll find out the aftermath of the spell in the next chapter so not long to wait to have your question answered.
With this background revealed, I'm curious to see Tara and Willow face off again. Methinks it will be more angsty, knowing what I know.

It will indeed be angsty, I can say that without spoiling anything because readers would expect nothing less
I'm also wondering who enchanted the mirror and if s/he knew that it would merge the Willows.

Tara did, as mentioned in Chapter 25 I think it was…
“I did,” Tara replied, “Just after you made the decision to bring Willow back...I knew she would have no memories of what happened to her, and I knew she would have to find out eventually but I did not want to have to tell her to her face…and a part of me did not want her to find out at all. The mirror was my way of salving my conscience…at least a little.”

Cheers very much!

safuega: In a manner analogous to VampTara, Abraham has lost much of his humanity, even though he is still human. And I agree, much of this is punishing himself, especially in that he has denied himself some key joys of life to concentrate on his vengeance.
Yes, if we did follow standard soul-restoring lore, Tara would merely be the same demon bound by a soul, but there had to be a little more than that for this story to truly work. It does allow an avenue for her and Willow to be together in the future, a little bit of hope.
Abraham’s price for the mojo may actually not be revealed for some time, I’m going to be a little quiet on that one but you are right, he is pretty old, late fifties by my timeline (and yes, I have a timeline!). The rest of Tara’s imprisonment will be dealt with in the next chapter.
Tara has kept herself alive for a reason…and that will be revealed soon!
The beating heart has been a theme throughout this whole story, indeed, it is the very first line of the tale so I’m glad it has a strong impact when reading it.
You are very right in saying that the next W/T encounter will be intense, while I don’t intentionally set out to bust any intense-o-meters, I do try and write as powerfully as I can.
Once again, thank you very much and I really hope I don’t kill you all before this story is done, hopefully the ending will be so nice that you’ll all live!

wimpy0729: Hi there Wimpy, I’m pleased to hear that you enjoyed the latest tortuous instalment. Yes, the dream sequence was intended to be shocking, definitely setting up the two sides of Tara.
Unfortunately, what Abe has done to her means that Tara will hurt over her memories for the rest of her life but I do promise that there will be hugs and puppies at some stage in the distant future! Oh I’m mean…

Foomatic: Foo, many thanks for your kind blabbering, and I hope you don’t use up too much of your work time checking for updates…well, actually I do as its very flattering…as long as your boss doesn’t find out! I’m glad you’re enjoying the fic.

katjetson: Haha, I’m not sure you’d call my hairdo fierce at all, it’s long, brown and decidedly wavy bordering on curly…at one stage in my life I was blonde and as much fun as I had, I will not be repeating that phase!
I’m not sure where the inspiration comes from, probably from literature and film, as all good writing must…and then it gets mushed around in my brain and spewed forth as something resembling paragraphs.
Yep, we now have 100 years of painful ground to cover although in the interests of keeping things interesting, there will be small jumps in time throughout the next few chapters.
And nope, we have yet to see Willow fuck Tara, which is an extremely unfortunate situation which I must rectify…I will at some stage!

Belli Bear: I would hardly use the world genius in relation to my little tale although it is very flattering! Feedback of any kind is good, praise or critique. I fully credit the feedback system for making me a much better writer.
I’m glad that those people checking for updates don’t have to wait too long!

LittleBit: I’m glad Tara regaining her soul was at least a little bit analogous to Angel regaining his soul as I must confess that I have seen very little of seasons 1-3 of the show (not out of any particular dislike on my part, I’d just much rather be watching episodes with Tara!) so I can’t actual recall what happened to him.
Glad you enjoy the frequent updates, there may be a short delay until the next chapter as I’ve had a wee bit of a writing holiday and am a bit behind.

Zampsa1975: My account of what will happen to Tara at Abe’s hands will definitely be tasteful, I won’t give too much away but you don’t have long to wait to see it, next chapter. There are a few more chapters to wait until Willow and Tara meet up again though.

diamondforever: I’ll take your being overwhelmed as a compliment, thanks! I will try and amaze you with the next chapter!
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 15 Jan)

Postby JustSkipIt » Mon Jan 21, 2008 3:23 pm

Chapter 28 - Wow. I missed an update completely. Bad on me. And what a fantastic update it was. I love the disclosure of Abraham's plan and the way that Tara calls him on his sick plans. Woo hoo for trying to stop him. I love that this substitute wizard is concerned but also a capitalist. Tee hee.

The dream is incredibly well done. I'm not much for dream sequences but this one works so perfectly. And then Tara's realization is just so tortured. Now we're getting to the how of the now.
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 15 Jan)

Postby Artemis » Tue Jan 22, 2008 11:52 pm

Eep, I'm behind - I still have to read chapter 28, but since I've been remiss in leaving feedback anyway, I just wanted to drop by and say I'm really loving how the events of the past are all coming together to create the present. I've got this image of Willow sitting largely unaware (though she's learning more, especially since her sojourn into her previous life) with the whole background tapestry of this story around her, creating her and the circumstances she's in with Tara, and we're slowly seeing all of that be revealed.

And I like how it's not any one thing that's brought Willow and Tara to their current predicament - which, in spite of the obvious troubles, is a chance for them to be together again, as they would have been to begin with had not everything under the sun intervened to muck them about. Rather it's a combination of plans and impulsive actions and chance and madness and malevolence and guilt, all coming together without really meaning to.

It's a grand construct - and in spite of understanding how frustrating is must be for Willow to be being kept at arm's length from the truth, the complexity of it all means I can also totally understand how Giles and the others can be worried for her ability to cope with it, and wanting to proceed slowly and cautiously.
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 15 Jan)

Postby WolfDragonGod » Wed Jan 23, 2008 12:43 pm

wow sweet update it rocked chapter 28 right....i just read it on through the looking glass i don't know if you have posted it here yet but if you have i must say it was so good and slightly sad i mean know she feels the pain she has caused a 100 times more then she did when she was a vampire...i hope she learns something from this and also i can't wait for the next update.
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 15 Jan)

Postby nothingtosay » Wed Jan 23, 2008 10:29 pm

intriuging...

Thump-thump, thump-thump, thump-thump…

The steady sound was overwhelming, filling her entire head as though trying to make her skull crack and burst. She opened her mouth as she struggled for a breath but found even more pain. Air burned her throat as it forced its way down to her chest. As her lungs inflated she desperately needed to scream but she collapsed into a coughing fit. She lay on the floor, her back arched as she struggled to just breathe normally…


i wonder about the collar thing?..and how did her comrads deal with her being a daywalker.....

would love to read more. update soon please.:D
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 15 Jan)

Postby WillowRulez » Thu Jan 24, 2008 4:32 pm

“Would raping her truly fulfil your promise to make me suffer?”

Vampire Tara is pretty... smart. Not that the actual Tara isnt. But she knows what buttons to push. Good for Abraham that he didnt react.
Ah, so the spell doesnt only restore the soul but also the "bodily functions"! :p
Great description of Tara drinking Willow's blood, very vivid. (And no, I usually dont like the gory stuff).
Totally missed this update! Didnt check the update thread for some time and since it said 15 Jan in the thread title I didnt check. Forgive me? :smash
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 15 Jan)

Postby what_we_do_is_secret » Thu Feb 07, 2008 9:59 am

Just wanted to plea for an update cus I keep checking the board every day at work and this story's just moving further down the board. I should probably start reading some other ones but this is one of my favourites stories and i'm so dying to find out what happens next!
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 15 Jan)

Postby Alcy » Sat Feb 09, 2008 11:46 pm

Sorry for the lack of updates over the past month, the next chapter is coming along and should be up in the next couple of days.

JustSkipIt: Well, you’ve been busy Deb so you’re definitely forgiven for missing an update! Glad you enjoyed it, I hope to have the next chapter up sooner rather than later.
Yeah, I’m not normally much for dream sequences either, I prefer diaries, at least its real. I usually get annoyed when characters progress their relationship only to have one of them wake up, but in this case it wasn’t really pretending to progress anything, more laying bare VampTara’s tortured state of mind…which will of course be further explored in the next chapter.

Artemis: Hi Chris, thanks very much for stopping by and letting me know you’re enjoying VR. It certainly is a complicated tapestry that is being woven and I hope it still all makes sense. There are so many threads all over the place I’m glad readers have stuck with me on my promise to tie everything together…and I do feel at this stage in the fic that it is being tied together, most of the answers are there, we just need a resolution (which is coming I promise!)

WolfDragonGod: Thanks very much for the praise, it was definitely supposed to be sad, VampTara’s been through a lot and the next chapter is going to be rough for her too, I hope you’re still looking forward to it!

nothingtosay: Well, I did mention that Spike and Angelus had a huge problem with Tara, even before she regained her soul.
I will try and update as soon as I can.

WillowRulez: Yep, VampTara sure knows how to push all the right buttons doesn’t she.
I’m not a huge fan of gore, I’m more a fan of smut and action, but given the nature of this fic, it does seem that gore should play a part.
You’re forgiven for missing an update, they’re a little bit slow in coming at the moment.

What we do is secret: Sorry for the lack of updating, I’ve been kind of busy lately but the update is coming along I promise!
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 15 Jan)

Postby WolfDragonGod » Sun Feb 10, 2008 12:31 am

Alcy wrote:
WolfDragonGod: Thanks very much for the praise, it was definitely supposed to be sad, VampTara’s been through a lot and the next chapter is going to be rough for her too, I hope you’re still looking forward to it!



You know i am looking forward to it girl....your stories rock
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 15 Jan)

Postby JujuDeRoussie » Sun Feb 10, 2008 4:00 am

Hello Alcy :)

I thought I had sent a feedback but it seems not. Maybe I thought I did and that's it.
Now, I think I remember what happened. See I just wrote one but when I clicked on "submit" it didn't work and deleted all what I had written. That is what must have had happened. :miff

Anyway... That was yet another fantastic update.
Vampire Tara was really clever. She didn't manage to save her demon from a soul but still... abraham did hesitate. Even if for only some seconds. That's a kind of victory right?

Though, in the end we find Tara Maclay back. To our delight. Not Tara Maclay as she was sure, but still Tara Maclay. Poor Little Thing. It is really heartbreaking.
I think you did a really good job in describing her change, her feelings to the change. The thumping heart and everything.
:)

Sorry for the lateness of this feedback,

Thanks

Friendly,

Julia :)
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 15 Jan)

Postby Alcy » Mon Feb 11, 2008 7:03 pm

First, a few more replies:

WolfDragonGod: Thanks once again!

Juju: I hate it when you write something and then lose it, I learnt my lesson and I write everything in Word to start with. VampTara is definitely clever in her evilness and she knew exactly which of Abraham's buttons to push to get him to react. We do have Tara back...not the Tara we know but more of a Tara than the vampire ever was!

Without further ado, here's the next chapter.


Chapter 29 – The Last Van Helsing



She does not know for sure how long her fists have pounded on the stone walls of her prison, nor how long her screams of pain have echoed within their confines, only her instincts tell her that it has been longer than mere days or weeks. She knows this because she has already screamed for so long her voice has wasted away to nothing and she can feel the painful red raw state of her knuckles. Although vampires are creatures of the night, she can no longer stand the state of absolute darkness in which she is kept and she longs for a light of any kind…even the sunlight which would bring about her destruction.

Her world of solitude is harshly interrupted with the sound of a door opening and a weak light suddenly filling her cell. Her eyes have difficulty adjusting and all she can see is a dark shadow coming to stand before the iron bars of her cell. There is a rasping noise that hurts her ears and the grate on the iron door is opened, another bowl of blood is slopped into middle of her cell, most of its contents spilling onto the already stained and sticky floor. She starts to crawl towards the shafts of light spilling across the floor, like a moth to a flame, but all too quickly the grate is slammed shut and the shadow leaves. Moments later the external door closes to throw her back into complete darkness. A weak, strangled sob erupts from her mouth as she feels the loss of light as yet another cruel stab to her beating heart.

She collapses to the floor. The sobs gradually intensify until her entire body is twisted and heaving. Her cries emerge as near-silent, breathy gasps from her hoarse throat. This continues until she is too weak to even cry and her limp body is nothing more than a lump on the floor of her cell. Time passes, although she cannot be sure if it is minutes or hours. Instead everything merges together into one impenetrable void where nothing is coherent. Nothing until she sees a flash of red in her mind. It is just as abrupt and painful as the light hurting her eyes, possibly even more so. Gradually the colours solidify, forming a face so perfectly beautiful she has difficulty remembering if such a person ever existed.

“W-W…”

The word is on her lips but it will go no further, she will not allow herself to put a name to the face. However she remembers something of why she is enduring her tortured existence. The desire to live once again enters her mind.

She manages a slow, awkward crawl, using her elbows rather than her wounded hands and makes her way to the bowl. She does not need to feel for it, she can smell the sharp tang of blood and knows exactly where it is. Balancing the bowl between her wrists, she lifts it to her lips and drinks heartily. As it slides down her throat she immediately feels invigorated, her thoughts become more coherent and she thinks perhaps she might not be going insane after all. After draining the bowl and licking it dry, she tosses it in the direction of the door. She listens to it clatter against the iron bars

She knows her existence is pitiful and she is reduced to being a mere tortured wreck of a creature…but she also knows that she has something to live for. This something overrides any shreds of dignity she still retains and makes her accept the pitiful food her captor offers her. She knows she has to stay alive. She clings to this purpose, it is her whole existence. Out of necessity she suppresses all thoughts of never leaving her cell. She has already spent countless hours wondering what would befall her if her captor should die and leave her imprisoned. Imagining a slow, lingering death once brought her to the point of madness and it was only with great effort that she forced herself back to the present and the shreds of information which kept her alive.

She makes her way to a corner of her cell, with her hunger sated for now she is able to think about sleep. With her limbs folded around her, knees tucked up to her chest and arms hugging them tightly against her, she closes her eyes. She allows the slow beating of her heart to lull herself to sleep even as she knows that the nightmares that plague her waking hours will increase tenfold in her unconscious mind.

~~~~~~

1828

Jeremiah Croft thought himself one of the luckiest young men alive…well, apart from his unfortunate infancy where both his parents died within the space of a month. However, his lack of any memory whatsoever of his parents meant that the misfortune of their passing had very little impact on his life, other than those moments in which he wondered how very different his life would have been if they had lived. However, after listening to Mr Giles’s recollections, he was of the firm opinion that he came from a very fine and interesting family indeed. He had inherited the dark good looks and swarthy build of his grandfather, tempered somewhat with softer lines from his mother’s side. Both his father and grandfather had been demon hunters, a rare occupation indeed but one in which the sixteen year old was determined to excel.

He could think of no better ally in this goal than his foster father, Rupert Giles. Even from early boyhood he had realised that the old man was a veritable trove of knowledge. Giles seemed to know everything about anything and there was absolutely no answer he could not give…although there were more than a few answers that he would not give the young lad, not yet anyway.

Jeremiah did not overly mind as he felt that his education was progressing at a very fine pace indeed. Not only could he read and write…he could do so perfectly in Greek and Latin. He also knew more about demonology than was natural for any young man to know and he knew how to kill them…in theory at least. He had never actually come face to face with a demon and although he had often protested to Giles, he was secretly glad he was not yet old enough to be unleashed on the creatures of the night. Still, Giles had gone as far to say that Jeremiah was the most exceptional student he had ever taught. Although Jeremiah had been raised to be modest, he could not help but think of his exceptional skills as being exceedingly exceptional indeed.

He also thought himself particularly lucky to be alive at such an exciting time and living in a city as vibrant and bustling as London. There was no greater proof of this than the scene upon which he gazed this particular spring morning.

Jeremiah had previously thought that no sight could possibly be more fascinating than watching a building the size of Montagu House be torn down. Watching day by day as the once grand library was reduced to its basic elements, brick, wood, glass and tile, Jeremiah realised that one could not truly appreciate the technical marvel of construction until one had witnessed its deconstruction. Giles on the other hand did not seem to share his enthusiasm for the building’s destruction. Young Jeremiah very wisely deduced that Giles had developed a strong affinity for his old library and had difficulty accepting the fact that Montagu House’s collection had grown to the point where they were almost spilling out the doors and windows. He had often helpfully reminded Giles that this was the way progress worked, the old was destroyed to make way for the new but more than once he had been silenced mid-sentence by an angry glare. At times such as this, he wisely held his tongue until the time came when Giles was able to appreciate exactly what it was that was being created.

The time, Jeremiah thought, had finally come. He had not visited the construction site for over a month and his patience was dully rewarded at the sight of all the progress that had been achieved. With a grin breaking out on his face, he turned to Giles who was still some distance behind him.

“I told you they would have commenced the raising of the beams!” he pointed in the distance to where an intricate iron beam was being ever so slowly lifted heavenward. Giles nodded politely as he finally caught up with his young charge. “Did I also tell you that due to its immense size, the beams are cast iron! We are witnessing history Giles…you can almost envision an entire building made of iron in the not too distance future.”

“Almost,” Giles muttered wryly, “Almost.”

“Giles, you do not need to feign enthusiasm merely to humour me, “Jeremiah folded his arms across his chest as though he were offended but there was a gleam in his eye and his grin lingered on his face.

“Your enthusiasm is overly infectious,” Giles admitted grudgingly, “Although I still do not see what was wrong with our old home…the books and I were perfectly content.”

Jeremiah was not at all impressed by this line of argument, “Giles, I spent my childhood listening to you complain about Montagu House’s lack of space…and you very nearly keeled over when you learnt that the King’s Library of 65,000 volumes was to be donated to the collection. You should really admit that you fear change, it is a common trait in one so…”

The young man’s mouth clamped shut before he could utter his next word, thereby digging a larger hole for himself. However, he had not cut himself off quickly enough and Giles’s hand snapped out to cuff him lightly over the back of his head. As he rubbed his head he cast an annoyed glance back over his shoulder towards Giles. He met the warlock’s stern gaze and decided that any further conversation on the subject was a bad idea.

“There stands Mr Van Helsing,” Jeremiah tactfully changed the subject away from Giles’ advanced years, pointing towards a tall figure in the distance.

“Indeed,” Giles stated, hardly sounding as though he had just laid eyes on an old friend.

As the two men drew closer, it was all too apparent that Abraham Van Helsing was throwing himself with great gusto into the rebuilding project. He moved about the construction site with the vigour of a man half his age, seeming to oversee every aspect and issue orders to every man working. He had stripped down to his shirt which was stained with as much grime and sweat as the lowliest labourer.

Jeremiah was less keen to approach closer now that he had seen Van Helsing; he had never liked the aloof, temperamental Museum Director…and the feeling was most probably mutual. While Giles had all the time in the world for him and his incessant questions, Van Helsing managed to ignore him most of the time and the few times when he did have something to say to him, it was usually unjustifiably harsh.

“What was Mr Van Helsing like when he was younger?” Jeremiah asked as he and Giles came to a halt just outside the construction site, both watching as an intricately worked iron truss was lifted skyward by the wooden cranes.

Giles turned his head slightly, not fully meeting Jeremiah’s gaze, “Why do you ask?”

Jeremiah shrugged, trying to play down his curiosity, “No real reason…I just wondered if he was always such a grumpy old bastard.”

Although Giles would not meet his gaze, Jeremiah was staring straight at him and he saw the small, sad smile that curled his lips. Behind his glasses, Giles’s eyes were slightly misty.

“Your father felt exactly the same way about Abraham as you do…which is…” Giles struggled to find the appropriate word and finally came up with, “Unfortunate.”

“I fail to see how such an opinion is unfortunate,” Jeremiah muttered, turning his attention back to the construction work, the iron beam was being manoeuvred into place atop the stone work, “It is naught but the truth.”

“It may very well be the truth…but it was not always so,” Giles replied, “It is unfortunate that Abraham will be remembered for the man he has become…as opposed to the man he was.”

“And what sort of man was he?” Jeremiah continued his line of questioning in order to be polite, sensing that Giles felt it important.

“Almost the opposite of everything he is now…kind, quietly spoken, utterly selfless and terribly brave,” Giles elaborated, the tone of his voice taking on a wistful nature as though he would give anything to have that man back once again.

“Giles, this line of conversation is prodding me to inquire as to the reason behind such a change…it must have been truly momentous to cause such a shift in character.”

“Another time perhaps,” Giles’s tone clearly indicated that was as much as he was prepared to say.

Jeremiah drew his attention away from the work going on in front of him and turned to Giles with an annoyed look on his face. He felt decidedly cheated by the fact that Giles would build up such a picture of Van Helsing’s background only to refuse to add the last few details. When he saw the look in Giles’s eyes, he realised that whatever it had been, his mentor was also invested emotionally those mysterious events of the past. He frowned slightly at this realisation, wondering what it could have been to cause such a change in Abraham Van Helsing and yet leave Rupert Giles unaffected…or was he? Jeremiah began to think that perhaps his mentor had also changed…although this was difficult to accept, he had always imagined that Giles had changed little over the centuries. Jeremiah immediately felt somewhat ashamed that he would hold onto such a narrow point of view…people changed over the course of their lives, sometimes dramatically and there was no reason for Giles to be any different.

“Did it have something to do with his family?” Jeremiah prodded tentatively, “Did someone die?”

Giles gave him a ‘warning’ look but Jeremiah was not to be put off so easily. He felt he had already pushed the boundaries of his relationship with his mentor farther than was appropriate, going a little further was worth the risk…and he did not seriously think that Giles could actually be angry with him anyway.

“It must have been someone dying, his wife? His brother…sister…”

Giles let out a small growl as soon as Jeremiah mentioned the word ‘sister’, “You really are the most impertinent and rude young man I have ever had the misfortune of teaching…desist with this line of questioning or I will have you personally re-organise the Museum’s entire catalogue!”

Jeremiah once again found himself clamping his mouth shut, he had absolutely no doubt that Giles would act on his threat. He had no desire to spend the rest of his life cataloguing museum objects and decided that it was best not to pursue his line of questioning. The information he had gleaned however, was more than enough to inspire him to start a little research of his own. So Abraham Van Helsing had a sister…Jeremiah predicted that by the end of the day he would know exactly who she was and what had happened to her. He resumed watching the raising of the beams with a satisfied expression on his face, not knowing that the afternoon’s events would render digging for Van Helsing’s family history completely irrelevant.

What happened next came in a blur of noise and flying dust, even later, reflecting on what had happened, Jeremiah could not be entirely sure that his memories were correct. He could however, be certain of the outcome, having seen it with his own eyes. It was an image which would be burned into his mind for the rest of his life.

At some point, one of the thick cables carrying the beam skywards snapped and the heavy iron truss came crashing back down to earth. It didn’t fall straight; it flew almost as though it had been picked up in a gust of wind. There was an awful sickening sound as it hit the ground, thudding into stonework, earth…and flesh.

“Oh my god,” Jeremiah whispered, “Mr Van Helsing…”

Even as his voice trailed off, Giles was already running towards the scene of the accident. He had disappeared into the cloud of dust before Jeremiah had even thought to make his feet move. As he did make his way forward, the shouts and cries of the workmen filled his ears and the dust his nostrils and eyes. He was rubbing his eyes ineffectively when he saw Giles bent low to the ground over the torso of a man pinned beneath the fallen beam. His jaw dropped as he moved closer and saw Abraham Van Helsing’s ashen face. As his gaze trailed lower he realised what had happened…the heavy iron beam had brutally and roughly sliced him in half. The splashes of violent red covering the ground and the lower half of his torso were in stark contrast to the pallor of his skin.

Jeremiah immediately stumbled to the ground and felt as though his stomach would eject his breakfast, he gamely fought to keep himself under control but only by not looking at the scene in front of him.

“Abraham…” it was Giles’s voice, dry and strained, it seemed as though he could not find the words.

“Don’t bother with your….sympathies, Giles,” Abraham’s voice carried faintly to Jeremiah’s ears, it sounded as though it were being forced out between his lips, “…you know as well as I that death is only the beginning.”

Rupert Giles have seen the face of death before, the sight in front of him brought him back to another time when another Van Helsing lay dying in front of him. However, he had long ceased to feel the emotional bonds with Abraham that he had shared with Willow and there was but one thought on his mind…and it was not sympathy.

“Abraham, you must tell me where the skull is!” Giles fought the urge to shake the dying man by his lapels.

Abraham Van Helsing smiled, a toothy grin of pain, blood bubbling between his teeth, he gasped, “Y-you know it is well…h-h-hidden.”

“It needs to be destroyed!” Giles urged, gripping the dying man’s hand.

Abraham’s severed body shuddered violently, Giles gripped him by the shoulders to keep him still and finally he sagged in a limp form. Giles appeared crestfallen as the man died without giving him any further information. However, even as life fled his body, Abraham managed to utter his last words…words which seemed to make absolutely no sense.

“Most…Horrid…Magicks,” Abraham whispered.

He was then still; his eyes stared blankly towards the heavens, his cragged and pale face appearing at peace. Giles’s body flopped backwards to the ground, and he sat staring at the corpse with an expressionless face.

A few metres away, Jeremiah finally had his stomach under control and managed to make his way to Giles’s side. He reached down and laid a firm hand on Giles’s shoulder. The contact was not to express his sympathy for Van Helsing’s death, but to keep himself upright when he was in danger of sagging to his knees at the horrific sight.

“What does that mean?” Jeremiah asked to keep his mind off the mutilated man lying in front of him, “Giles, his last words made no sense!”

“They made perfect sense,” Giles assured him with a brisk nod; he reached out and tenderly closed Abraham’s eyes.

A few moments later, he stood. With his support gone, Jeremiah’s legs gave out on him and he slumped to his knees, feeling more than a little sick to his stomach. He could not drag his eyes away from the body, finally feeling a hint of sadness well up inside him…more for the man that Abraham Van Helsing must have once been than the one he knew. When he eventually did draw his gaze away he found Giles was walking away.

“Hurry up if you’re coming,” he called over his shoulder.

“Where?” Jeremiah scrambled to his feet and managed to break into a jog to catch up with Giles.

“Gordon Square.”

~~~~~~

Jeremiah Croft had only ever once set foot in the parlour of Abraham Van Helsing’s house on Gordon Square and that had been more than far enough for the young man. However as he followed Giles in for the second time, he realised the house was not as foreboding as he had once thought it. It was not too hard for the young man to know why, with the dominating and thoroughly unpleasant presence of Van Helsing himself missing from the picture the house actually seemed pleasant and inviting.

There was no time to make oneself at home however; he almost had to maintain a jog to keep up with Giles as the older man moved through the house, dismissing the questioning servant that appeared from the kitchen with a flick of his hand. Jeremiah made an apologetic face towards the grey haired old man but there was a look of acceptance on his face as though Giles had a right to intrude in Abraham Van Helsing’s home.

Giles made his way swiftly into a library of sorts and straight for a bookcase. When he tugged a certain book, the entire section, still laden with books, began to move.

“How splendid!” Jeremiah exclaimed as the hidden door swung inwards to reveal a narrow passageway leading down.

He followed Giles closely, the darkness broken by the burning torches in their brackets. When they emerged into the room that lay beneath the house proper, Jeremiah’s jaw dropped to see the training room laid out in front of him with all its marvels and distractions. Even as he was trying to take everything in, Giles moved off to the left towards yet more bookcases. Reluctantly dragging his eyes away from the weapons, Jeremiah followed him. He finally understood Abraham’s last words when he saw Giles’s fingers fall onto the leather bound spine of a book. He glanced at the title to read ‘Moste Horride Magicks.’ Abraham’s last words had been the title to the book which would unlock yet another secret passage.

“There are only two copies of this book in existence,” Giles answered Jeremiah’s unspoken question, “One is in the Museum’s rare books collection…and the other has been here for some time.”

The case swung inwards as soon as the book was tugged, the light from the torches burning in the training room revealed a dark passage with no lights of its own. While Giles stepped straight into the darkness, Jeremiah retrieved a torch from a nearby bracket before following. The light revealed the passage to lead absolutely nowhere; the only opening was an iron barred door to one side. Jeremiah stopped just behind Giles who was staring into the darkness beyond the bars.

“What is it Mr Giles?” Jeremiah strained to see anything through the iron bars.

He saw nothing but darkness but definitely caught a whiff of several strong odours. His nose wrinkled a few times before he was assaulted by the full, extremely unpleasant smell emanating from within the cell. It was almost tangy…like blood and fear mixed together. He heard movement in the darkness before he saw anything; there was a frantic, animalistic scuffling. Gradually his eyes adjusted to the dim light and he made out a form pressed against the far wall. His eyes widened as he realised it was not an animal but a person. The figure turned slightly towards the light and he caught sight of a decidedly feminine shape to the jaw and lips…although he could make out little, he was sure it was a woman.

“Mr Giles, I do not believe that is a skull,” Jeremiah observed pointedly, he paused and frowned, “Well, there is a skull but it would be attached to her neck…and covered in flesh…so you wouldn’t really call it a skull as such, given that she…or whatever it is, is still alive.”

“Indeed,” Giles ignored much of Jeremiah’s babbling and stepped a little closer to the bars, although he did not need to see the face of the figure huddled in front of him to know who it was.

It slowly lifted its head; Giles’s gaze went not to its face but to the collar of his own creation fastened around the creature’s pale throat. The collar had gone missing from his office at Montagu House some years earlier. Now he knew exactly what had become of it.

His gaze then travelled back up to the creature’s face and his instincts were confirmed. It was indeed the demon who had killed Willow Van Helsing. Its blue eyes pierced the darkness but the dull stare lacked the fire or anger he remembered from Covasna. The only emotions he saw were fear and absolute sorrow.

He held his hand over the lock and murmured a few words, of its own accord the bolts slid free and the door swung inwards. Although he approached the demon with a measure of caution, Giles felt strangely unthreatened. He watched as it pressed itself hard against the wall as though trying to shrink from his presence.

As his eyes became accustomed to the gloom in the cell he was able to make her out more clearly. She was clad in rags with every exposed area of skin absolutely filthy. There was crusted blood around her mouth but that was not the sight that caused him to drop his jaw, it was the moist tears creating tracks through the dirt on its face. Tentatively Giles reached out and touched its face, feeling the wetness for himself. It flinched away immediately, twisting her head away from his touch. Without pity, Giles seized its chin in a vice-like grip and yanked the demon’s head so he could stare into its eyes. He said nothing but the look on his face conveyed all the necessary hatred and revulsion.

Jeremiah watched silence for a moment until Giles dragged the woman to her feet. He was only just beginning to realise that the blood stains covering the floor and the rags she wore did not belong to her…it had been food.

“She is a vampire?” he whispered, staring at the blood stained bowl at his feet, “Why on earth would Mr Van Helsing be keeping a vampire locked in his cellar?”

Giles did not reply, instead he wrenched the demon to its feet and shouldered roughly past Jeremiah who had already jumped out of the way to avoid coming into contact with an actual demon. It made no attempt to struggle as Giles dragged it back into the training room and towards the stairs. Jeremiah could do nothing except follow, although he had a sinking suspicion as to what was about to happen.

His suspicions were confirmed minutes later as Giles opened a set of French doors that led to a small courtyard. Still the creature made no move to resist and with one final shove, Giles sent its thin, rag-clad body flying out onto the sun-drenched courtyard.

Although Jeremiah had never seen it for himself, it was a well known fact that vampires burned when exposed to sunlight. However, although the creature was writhing about in pain, it was obviously because the light hurt her after having been kept in darkness for a long time. All her movements, shielding her eyes, making for the small patch of shade by the wall, were reactions that a human would make…a demon would have already started burning.

“I don’t understand,” Jeremiah surged forward, his eyes wide with curiosity, “She looks like a vampire…and yet she is not burning? Giles, why does she not burn?”

Giles was far too disturbed to answer the young man; instead he drew a stake from the pocket of his jacket and crossed to where the creature lay curled in the centre of the courtyard. He seized the vampire roughly by the hair and it cried out once more in pain. Giles remained immune to the pathetic sounds emerging from its lips as he dragged it to its feet. Without waiting for it to gain a proper footing he pulled it up in one swift tug and threw it against the wall of the courtyard.

Such was the force behind the shove that Jeremiah winced as the vampire’s head cracked against the stone. She cried out again and he almost felt as though he should intervene. The feeling unnerved him somewhat as he had a well-developed loathing of vampires. After all, Giles had told him the one such creature had been responsible for his father’s death. However, he couldn’t help but feel that something was different…and the longer he stared at her, the more her realised he was seeing her as a woman rather than a demon.

Giles on the other hand, could not see it as anything but the demon that had murdered Willow Van Helsing. With rough fingers he tugged aside the rags covering its chest to expose the flesh above the heart. He then drew his arm backwards in preparation for plunging it downwards. He merely grazed the skin covering its chest with his fingers but that was all it took for him to feel the unmistakable thud of a heart. He paused long enough to come emerge from his hate fuelled rage and realised that the vampire was breathing. As it tried to cringe away from him, its breaths came short and fast with terror

“Tell me now you piece of filth, what has Abraham Van Helsing done to you?” Giles demanded in a tightly wound voice, clearly straining to maintain any semblance of control.

The vampire did not reply as it was still trying to shield its eyes from the harsh sunlight. He once again seized the chin, forcing it to look at him through narrowed eyes that watering profusely in its pain.

Giles felt his finger nails dig into its flesh but he could not care less, all he wanted was an answer, “Tell me now or I will take great pleasure in driving this stake through your chest!”

“S-s…” the vampire’s lips worked slowly as it struggled to form words.

Giles was impatient in his anger and he pulled he forward slightly only so he could again slam its head backwards against the stone, “Speak!”

“Soul,” the single word emerged as a drawn out gasp from its lips.

Just that one word was enough to almost knock Giles off his feet. For a moment his guard was down entirely and an expression other than anger registered on his face, that of fear…however it was quickly wiped, replaced once again by his fierce scowl. He could do nothing however about the turmoil that raged within. He wondered how the hell Abraham had managed to do the impossible.

“Giles, what does she mean by that?” Jeremiah asked incredulously, daring to step a little closer.

“Firstly stop referring to this creature as ‘she’,” Giles replied coldly, “It is not a person…and secondly, I believe Abraham Van Helsing found a way to restore it’s soul and the spell had a few unwanted side effects, a botched job most likely.”

“How can you restore a soul at all let alone botch it?” Jeremiah strained for a better view and his eyes widened when he clearly saw the rise and fall of her chest, while he had never seen a vampire before he definitely knew that they were not supposed to be breathing.

Giles ignored Jeremiah’s incessant questioning, knowing that there would be no end…and also because he did not possess many of the answers. His real concern was establishing why this creature had remained alive in Abraham’s cellar. Despite the pitiful state it was in, he felt only anger and hatred towards it. Although he found what Abraham had done to it to be horribly unethical from a magical point of view, he did not feel the slightest bit of sympathy for the suffering he had inflicted. Giles even felt a small smile come unbidden to his lips when he realised the creature would have been left in the dark, fully aware of exactly what she had done to Willow and suffering terribly because of it. It was a fitting punishment…if a little unconventional.

“You have precisely thirty seconds before I end your miserable existence…tell me, why are you still alive?” Giles demanded.

“T-to suffer,” it whispered, “H-he wanted me to…s-s-suffer.”

“I’m well aware of that!” Giles barked, removing his fingers from its chin only long enough to slap it across the cheek with the full force of his palm, the head snapped to one side momentarily but he grabbed the chin once more and forced it to face him even as the tears fell freely down its cheeks, “However I am also aware of the fact that you could have given up…refused to feed, ended all of this…surely that option was preferable to dwelling in your own filth for years?”

“Y-yes,” the vampire whispered, “but I had to live…to tell someone…to tell you…the skull…”

Giles scoffed derisively, “What does a pathetic creature like you know about the skull?”

“I know who knows where it is,” was the small reply.

“And I suppose Van Helsing told you this did he?” Giles snorted, already having difficulty believing a word of what she said.

She replied with the barest hint of a nod and drew in a deep breath before speaking, “He said W-Will…” another deep breath, “He said Willow would know how to find the skull.”

Giles let out an angry growl, incensed that it would even dare to mention Willow’s name, “There is a small problem with that…one you are responsible for.”

“I know…and nothing I do will change that,” its voice was raspy, barely above a whisper, “But if you truly desire to uncover the skull in order to destroy it…you’ll need to bring her back.”

“Impossible!”

“No…nearly impossible…w-w would need to work together,” another deep, shaky breath before it continued, “You know as well as I that she deserves a chance at life…she was murdered cruelly…unjustly. Please Giles, ignore the fact that you have to accept the words of a demon and do it for her.”

Giles released the vampire and it fell back to the cobbles; pale skin marked red where his fingers had dug into the flesh. She immediately curled into a tight ball against the courtyard wall as though she expected him to strike her once again.

“Jeremiah, take this thing and get it cleaned up, I find its smell offensive!” Giles turned away from the vampire, unable to remain looking at her any longer.

Jeremiah stared blankly ahead in shock for a moment before Giles’s words actually registered. He looked back and forth between the vampire and Giles before spinning on his heels.

“Me?” Jeremiah spluttered, following Giles back into the house, leaving the vampire unattended as it huddled against the courtyard wall, “Giles…you can’t leave her in my care! I do not know what to do!”

“You must,” Giles growled, refusing to turn around as he continued walking further away from the courtyard, “I cannot look at it for a moment longer or I will drive this stake through its chest!”

He angrily tossed the stake to one side where it knocked a vase from a table, both stake and porcelain fragments fell to the floor. Jeremiah realised that Giles was not going to be swayed and stopped following him. He slowly turned around to stare back out the open door. The creature had not moved, she remained exactly where she had crouched when Giles had released her from his grip. With tentative steps, Jeremiah moved back out into the sunlight and into the presence of the vampire. His mouth opened to speak but he realised that he did not know what to say. What was one supposed to say to a filthy, half-starved vampire with a soul?

“Hello,” Jeremiah called quietly, “We haven’t been formally introduced but I am Jeremiah Croft.”

The vampire made no attempt at a response. Jeremiah screwed up his face as he pondered his next move. He felt somewhat annoyed by the fact that he was afraid of this creature, especially with his chosen career path at stake.

“If you would like to accompany me I can see about getting one of the servants to draw you a bath…and perhaps obtain some food…if you eat food? You prefer blood? Not that I am offering my own…I really would appreciate it if you did not attempt to drink mine, you surely noticed that Giles is in somewhat of a temper and I think attacking me might push him over the edge…and you would be…well…” Jeremiah spread his fingers to mimic his words, “Poof!”

She flinched noticeably, causing Jeremiah to instantly regret his words. Although he was reluctant to move any closer to the vampire, he hunkered down slowly to join her at her level.

“I do not know who this ‘Willow’ is or why Mr Giles needs to find this skull but I do know that he has decided to spare you, an unlikely turn of events given what you are, so you should accept my help…will you come with me?”

She turned towards him, studying him with her empty eyes. Jeremiah tentatively extended his hand, trying his best to keep his fingers from trembling.

Several minutes passed, Jeremiah and the vampire continued to stare at one another, neither daring to make a further move, either from fear on his part or something unknown on her part.

“Will you come with me?” Jeremiah repeated, he had been staring into the vampire’s sapphire gaze so long he feared he was being intoxicated. Given that this was the effect when her eyes were dull and her strength sapped, he could only imagine the effect their full luminescence would have on him…he imagined that it would be something akin to infatuation.

Finally she started to move, her hand moved away from its position curled against her stomach and towards Jeremiah’s outstretched hand.

“T-Tara,” she said the name as though it were unfamiliar to her own ears.

“Tara,” Jeremiah repeated, managing a small smile of encouragement.

As Tara’s icy fingers met his own, he of course had no idea that he was taking the hand of the vampire that had killed his father.


TBC in Chapter 30 – Resurrection
Last edited by Alcy on Mon Feb 11, 2008 7:08 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Willow Van Helsing...saving the world since 1777Van Rosenberg II - Lord of Ice and Shadow
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 15 Jan)

Postby JustSkipIt » Mon Feb 11, 2008 7:05 pm

Dibs

ETA: well how very interesting. So all these years Abraham has just allowed himself to be completely destroyed by his revenge and hatred. He's kept her in that cell so many years her sanity is gone and returned, gone and returned. She seems more sad animal than anything else. And he alone knows where the skull may be. Oh Giles. Your using young Croft (Jeremiah?) as the pov is quite effective. We can feel his romance for demon hunting and for Tara but also know his naivety. I'm no less fascinated than I've been all along.
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 15 Jan)

Postby taraslove » Mon Feb 11, 2008 7:08 pm

Damn it, I just missed it. That's what I get for screwing around when there's a post to be dibsed. Be back in a sec.



Well.

Now we know why Tara enchanted the mirror to merge WVH with WR. And, poor Jeremiah! I don't blame him for being dangerously close to being infatuated with Tara, but that's just a bad road for him to go down on all accounts. I wonder what he'll do when he finds out that Tara offed his dad.

And Giles. Holy cow! When he threw her into the sun, I didn't know whether to cheer or bury my head in my arms. He definitely has some righteous anger, and I'm loving the conflict that you've set up with that situation. And Tara's poor stutter. Man. Angst up the wa-zoo.

I must say, you're doing your job well because when that scaffolding came down, all I could think was, "Oh no! The skull!" Poor Abraham. But he really did let vengeance make a mess of his life. So, not really.

Great update! Can't wait for the next.
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 12 Feb)

Postby dlline » Mon Feb 11, 2008 8:30 pm

Alcy!

Interesting update. Abraham is road kill, Giles is pissed, and Tara knows how to bring Willow back. Cool.

I have a question: What was your reasoning behind writing the first part in the present tense? Just wondering.

Anyway, thanks for another cool update.

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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 12 Feb)

Postby wimpy0729 » Mon Feb 11, 2008 10:24 pm

Oh, Alcy, so glad to see you back. You know I always miss you when you're gone for too long.

And wow, another powerful update. We see Abraham meet his end (eww), and luckily, Giles knew what his last words meant. I wonder if Giles really knew what to expect when he found that hidden cell. And boy, what a reaction. Although, it was understandable, I think Giles even scared me more than a little. And man, the image you created of Tara's existence in the cell, her clothes, the smell, the conditions of her knuckles, so powerful and sad.

We knew that Tara goes on to work with Giles, but it was so interesting to see how this all came about. Now I'm really curious since she brought up the subject of resurrecting Willow, and I'm really super anxious to see what happens in the next chapter.

Well, I have to take a minute to reflect on the Abraham of the beginning of the story, such a young, brave and vibrant man, is such contrast to the way he ended up. I remember Willow R even being afraid of his picture in the museum. So, so sad.

Can't wait to see what happens in your next, much awaited chapter.


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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 12 Feb)

Postby Safuega » Tue Feb 12, 2008 12:15 am

Oh my god, I could fall on my knees and weep tears of gratitude for your return! I was beginning to despair as to your whereabouts and the cliff you had left us hanging from.

Anyway, just got home from the office and I'm exhausted, so I'll return to leave proper feedback when I've actually read and not just skimmed the update.

ETA -- Oh Alcy, this udpate is terrible! It's terrible what's been happening to Tara, what's become of Abraham and even Giles' reaction. It's all terrible! And I know you wanted to convey how debased Tara had become by speaking of her not as a person but an object, but the whole thing struck me as so unfair. Once Tara got her soul back and other mysterious bits, she was as close to the Tara we all knew and loved, so to see Abraham and Giles behave the way they do towards here is horrifying and painful. The Tara that is suffering this torment is not the Tara that did those horrible things and it's unfair that this new Tara should have been treated the way Abraham has treated.

And you, you, you sliced him! I'm guessing this was your way of dealing with the monster he has become since putting Tara's soul back. I understand his pain at having failed both Tara and his sister, but once he realized that Tara had more than a soul, wtf was his excuse? I'm not sorry he died or the way he did. I get it, he was in pain, he was suffering but that did not give him the right to treat the new Tara in such horrible way. He would have been better off physically torturing and starving the vampire than what he's chosen to do here.

Giles -- I must admit that you surprised me with his harsh reaction, but I get it. I expect his behavior to change once he has gotten his hurt and rage at facing Willow's killer once more. I'm sure that like Abraham Giles has also been beating himself up for not having prevented Willow's death. So okay, I'll let him get his rage and pain out, but I expect his gazillion years of 'wisdom' and experience to kick in soon and start being kinder to poor suffering Tara.

Tara -- oh my god, it's so terribly sad what's been done to her. It's terrible that she go her soul back and now has to live with what she has done but to also have been kept in isolation and darkness is just terrible. As human beings we are social monkeys and there is a reason why isolation is a form of torture.

Now for my speculation (oh b/c the rest of my feedback is totally based on fact) -- so you've killed Abraham so the price for the mojo may not be tied to his death or it might be and you are just trying to throw us off the scent. I'm going to go with the second option and say that although Abe is dead his life is some sort of price for something else, something like allowing for Willow's resurrection, otherwise why could we not just resurrect Abe? He might have felt that she was dead before her time and without having a second chance at happiness after Tara was killed, so he might have struck some bargain with the powers that be that would allow her to come back. I refuse to believe that Willow's return is all just for the skull, yes, yes, I get that as Abe's sister there is no one better to think like him and figure out where he hid it, but I'd like to believe that her resurrection is more poetic than that.

Okay, that is as far as I got before my brain went dead. Thank you so much for sharing this incredible story. I look forward to the next installment, you genius, you!

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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 12 Feb)

Postby katjetson » Tue Feb 12, 2008 1:10 am

That's a big helping of "oof!" with a side of "ouch." Revenge and hate musta had a sale, 'cause Abe and Giles cleaned the shelves of it. It's been terribly crushing to watch the metamorphasis of Abraham, and to see his life end the way it did... He was indeed a tortured soul. And Giles having to watch the two VH's die. Ga, it must kinda suck to be a warlock. You know, living all kinds of old and seeing all kinds of suffering.

As for Tara... wow, has she been in that cell for YEARS?! Daaaaamn. My heart was bursting with ache after reading the state in which she has "lived" since being souled. What I can tell you is that in between bouts of Abe and Giles' venom being thrown in the direction of heart-beating Tara, all I kept thinking about was how desperately in love Willow VH and Tare once were. And how very much I wanted them get going with the sexual healing. But until then, gadzooks Alcy! I love this fic, and look forward to each new emotional journey you take me on.
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 12 Feb)

Postby Zampsa1975 » Tue Feb 12, 2008 3:51 am

Wow! Great update-y goodness... Tara is in really sad state... I hope she will get better soon... Seeing old Abe finally die was kinda sad, but what she did to Tara was unforgivable... Giles reaction to Tara was shocking but understandable... Jeremiah's reaction to Tara would be interesting when he finds out that it was Tara who killed his father, I hope he could forgive her atleast in some level... So in the next chapter we see the resurrection of Willow, it would be interesting to see how they pull that off...
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 12 Feb)

Postby Paint the Sky » Tue Feb 12, 2008 1:20 pm

I can't decide if Abraham told Giles what he did because he wanted to save Tara to salve his own conscience before dying or because even in death his need for vengence was strong as ever.

The fact that Tara survived this treatment at all is a testament to her amazing strength, both physically and mentally, plus her undying sorrow and love for Willow. I shudder at the pictures conjured by your writing of Tara's treatment at the hands of AVH.

The Tara/Giles relationship is going to be an interesting dynamic, it can't be an easy thing having to work with something you hate even though there is a common goal. What's the old saying, 'The enemy of my enemy is my friend'.

A fabulous read as ever.
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 12 Feb)

Postby WillowRulez » Tue Feb 12, 2008 2:35 pm

Jeremiah began to think that perhaps his mentor had also changed…although this was difficult to accept, he had always imagined that Giles had changed little over the centuries. Jeremiah immediately felt somewhat ashamed that he would hold onto such a narrow point of view…people changed over the course of their lives, sometimes dramatically and there was no reason for Giles to be any different.

I like Jeremiah. He is much nicer than his dad.
Never imagined Abraham dying such a horrible death. Always thought he died of age.
So Willow knows where the skull is. Not that it's THAT surprising that she knows. I just had my money on Giles... or Tara.
Jeremiah and Tara could have such great friendship... I wonder what happens when Jeremiah finds out the truth about Willow and Christopher. Did we ever see Lara in the room with Tara? How she reacted to her? If so, forgive me :( I really should reread the story when I find the time.
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 12 Feb)

Postby WolfDragonGod » Wed Feb 13, 2008 10:29 am

nice update and i and i am glad to be here reading it.
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 12 Feb)

Postby JujuDeRoussie » Wed Feb 13, 2008 4:09 pm

Hello Alcy :)

Yes I do type everything on Word when I reply to feedbacks, and I know I should do it too when I do a feedback myself. I do it sometimes though. Like right now. ^^

Abraham's death isn't really pleasant. But it is also ironic. Abraham Vanhelsing, Demon fighter, dead during the day by a human object, in an unfortunate accident.

Oh and.. 16 years? Tara has been there 16 years! No wonder she had trouble to let out a word. The way Giles was treating her were already good reasons, but to not talk for 16 years, or to see the light. Wow.
She's strong. She is really strong. :)

Thankfully Giles was there when Abraham Died, and thankfully he was able to at least give hime the book's title. :)

That is truly a wonderful fic. I know I have already say this, but really I love it!

Thanks for the update :)

Friendly,

Julia :)
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 12 Feb)

Postby nothingtosay » Thu Feb 14, 2008 2:38 pm

yaaaaaaaaaaaay! :pinky

update, here i thought i had to beg you for an update or i bash my head with my computer while waiting for an update. :D

happy v-day! :party

what a way to die for Ab...after all that fighting with evil and everything...and he gets sliced up in half.

AHA! so thats why they need Willow....so im guessing theres more flashbacks for Willow here.

ill be waiting for more.
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 12 Feb)

Postby Alcy » Sun Feb 17, 2008 12:15 pm

JustSkipIt: Hi there Deb, congrats on sneaking in for another dibs, I hope things are going well with the recent arrival in your life and you’re managing to get some sleep!
Yep, Abraham has been boiling in his grief for a long time and so it’s justifiable that by the end there is no redemption available for him. Willow was grief struck when she lost Tara but she channelled her energies into something worthwhile…demon hunting.
Glad you enjoyed things from Jeremiah’s POV, it’s always good to sneak in a fresh pair of eyes into the story before we get back to our girls (which I am really looking forward to, I so miss writing them together!) I will endeavour to keep up your fascination as you know I am always flattered that I can even manage to fascinate one of my favourite writers.

taraslove: Infatuation with Tara is always a dangerous thing, as a certain redhead would be able to tell you and Jeremiah has almost as much reason to hate Tara as Willow does.
Giles is one big anger ball but we’ll see how we can work out an understanding between him and Tara. There does seem to be a lot of angst going around at the moment although I think that has been the case through most of the story.
I must say, you're doing your job well because when that scaffolding came down, all I could think was, "Oh no! The skull!"

Abraham really had turned into an old bastard by the end so my mission was accomplished, getting people to dislike such a well-liked character. Thanks very much!

dlline: It’s been a while so it was a tough chapter to come back with but I think it came out alright. There are quite a few things going on that are necessary to move the story along.
Your curiosity is most welcome, I wrote it on a whim, I haven’t written a chapter of anything in the present tense before so I thought why the hell not, I’ll give it a go! It was a challenge to say the least and I don’t think I’ll be repeating it, but it was interesting!

wimpy0729: Hi there wimpy, well, I wasn’t gone for too long so hopefully the wait for an update wasn’t agonizing.
I don’t think Giles had any idea of what to expect when he entered that cell, it was obvious that he and Abraham had grown apart to the point where they barely knew each other anymore…although Giles still did not know what Abraham was capable of. As I said above, it took some effort to make Abraham into the character he became as he was such an awesome guy and it is sad.
I’m pleased to be able to bring everyone the back-story of Giles and Tara’s relationship…and it is a difficult road to get to the point where they are in the ‘present.’ If you read back over their interaction in earlier chapters, you’ll find that there is a good relationship between the two of them, if marred a little by Tara’s guilt and the fact that Giles cannot let her forget it.
I hope to be able to deliver the next ‘much awaited’ chapter soon!

safuega: I am pleased to be able to return, I would never leave anyone hanging out for a chapter for too long.
It is all exceptionally terrible, the Tara that languished in that cell for 16 years is very close to being the quiet young woman who wrote the diary entries at the beginning and it is heart wrenching to realise what she went through just to help Willow…not to be with Willow, as she believes that this will never happen, but to atone for what she did.
Yep, Abraham had become so nasty that he kinda deserved a nasty end after all those years he had tortured Tara.
Your prediction for Giles’s eventual change of heart is well reasoned, stay tuned for the next chapter for the continuation of the relationship between him and Tara.
You make some very good points with your speculation, of course, as per canon, resurrection is an exceptionally difficult thing to do and it will be no less so in this fic otherwise everyone would be getting resurrected! While Willow is key to finding the skull, if you read Tara’s first words to Giles, you’ll see that there is more to bringing her back than simply as a tool…Tara loves her, and she’ll do anything to atone for what she did. I think having Willow alive and hating her is preferable to having her dead.
Thank you very much for your valued and inspiring comments as always.

katjetson:
Revenge and hate musta had a sale, 'cause Abe and Giles cleaned the shelves of it.

Haha, very nicely said. Definitely a case of two for the price of one I’d say. It definitely must suck to be a warlock, although hopefully Giles’s strength is also evident in the type of man he is in the present and the role he carries out in Willow Rosenberg’s life as her teacher.
There is some serious sexual healing needed in this fic, both Willow and Tara just need to realise that everything will be fine after some hot gay lovin’! That will happen I promise…eventually. Thanks very much kat!

zampsa1975: Tara is definitely in a sad state, stay tuned for the next chapter to continue this part of her story as she recovers and has to work with Giles.
There will also be more interaction with Jeremiah and Tara which is also an interesting relationship to develop, as well as the resurrection of course!

Paint the Sky:
I can't decide if Abraham told Giles what he did because he wanted to save Tara to salve his own conscience before dying or because even in death his need for vengence was strong as ever.

You make a very good point and I’ll leave it up for individual interpretation as there are arguments for both ways!
There were some very interesting things coming out of this chapter, of course the fact that Tara’s love for Willow was the reason she survived all those years and the real beginning of the working relationship between Giles and Tara, both have had a formative influence on Willow so it was an important element of the story to tell.

WillowRulez: I’m glad you like Jeremiah, he’s like an earlier version of Myles…although I have to point out that Christopher is his grandfather and Benjamin, whom we only saw quite briefly, is his dad.
Never imagined Abraham dying such a horrible death. Always thought he died of age.

I think Abraham was always destined to die abnormally, I would think it was uncommon for a demon hunter to die of old age…and the Van Helsings are a particularly tragic family (a succession of dead infants, Mother died in childbirth, father died before his time, then Willow).
You will see more of Jeremiah and Tara interacting in the next chapter so I hope you enjoy it. And if you’ll remember back a few chapters, Lara and Tara were Giles’s workroom…Faith was being all snarky towards Tara because she was jealous of the looks between her lover and the vampire. And there are upcoming chapters with more interaction between them too.

WolfDragonGod: Thanks very much, I’m glad you’re reading too, I love sharing!

Juju: Abraham’s death is definitely sad, for one who spent much of his life fighting demons, to die in such a tragic but very human accident it seems like more of a waste.
Oh and.. 16 years? Tara has been there 16 years!
Yes, it’s a long time which definitely explains the mess she is in when Giles opens up her cell, and I hope to be able to convey the lingering effect of this in the next chapter. But it does go a long way to proving Tara’s strength and determination.
I’m really glad you’re still loving the fic.

nothingtosay: Well, there was no bashing your head with a computer waiting for an update (and hopefully I can put the next chapter up early enough!)
Yep, very icky way for Abraham to die but I don’t shy away from icky deaths where one is called for!

The next chapter is a tricky one but it's coming along nicely and I should have it done within the next few days.
:peace
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 12 Feb)

Postby Alcy » Tue Feb 19, 2008 1:57 pm

Chapter 30 – Resurrection

The comfortable blanket of night had fallen upon London’s houses and streets. It was quiet, with only the occasional meowing of a cat or rumbling of the night soil cart to disturb the peace of the mostly slumbering residents inside their modest and tidy town houses. Ordinarily, creatures of the night did not stalk the well-kept streets of the middle class but on this particular night, one lone figure moved quietly through the shadows.

Eventually, it paused for several minutes, ensuring that it was indeed alone on the street before moving towards the front door of one of the houses.

A moment later, the figure was greeted at the door by Jeremiah Croft, his already affable features rendered even friendlier by the grin that touched his lips at the sight of the person standing on the doorstep. He swiftly ushered the cloaked and hooded figure inside with a wave of his hand. His heart beat a little faster when he closed the door and the hood was drawn back to reveal a young woman with pale blonde hair. When she turned to regard him with a cool blue gaze he was powerless to keep his knees from trembling.

“Tara,” the tremulous tone of his voice reflected his nervousness, “It is truly a pleasure to see you again.”

She lifted her eyebrows as though a little surprised by his enthusiasm but she inclined her head to return the greeting. Jeremiah flushed so violent a shade of red, she may as well have kissed him.

When he had last seen Tara several months earlier, although her injuries had healed, she had still appeared painfully thin. Now as she stood before him, he found himself confronted with a woman of unsurpassed beauty, her hair shone like moonlight as it framed her marble-skinned face. Her lips were lustrous and red, only her eyes reflected a measure of her pain, an unspoken sadness that she carried with her like the black cloak on her shoulders.

Jeremiah struggled to find words to sum up the picture she presented, “You appear…well.”

He bit his lip, rather embarrassed that he was so afflicted in Tara’s presence, especially when he considered himself such an accomplished young man in all other respects. Clearly he had much to learn when it came to women, especially those that possessed an indescribable and unnatural beauty.

“Is Giles here?” Tara apparently did not share Jeremiah’s need for conversation.

The young man was clearly disappointed by her business-like manner but he maintained his cheery demeanour, “Unfortunately he is out at the moment…but I believe he was not intending to be long. Would you care to wait for him here? Take a seat perhaps?”

“I will wait,” Tara replied quietly, removing a small cloth wrapped bundle from beneath her cloak and holding it out in front of her with an amount of reverence, “but I would rather stand.”

“As you wish,” Jeremiah replied quietly, she then turned her back to him, he suspected she was concealing the parcel in her hands, and he suppressed a wistful sigh.

A small part of Tara felt decidedly uncomfortable standing in Giles’s small parlour with Jeremiah. Her discomfort had nothing to do with the young man himself, whom she supposed to be a truly good person, but everything to do with the turmoil in her own mind. Outwardly she appeared to be the perfect image of an ensouled vampire…however such a creature was supposed to look and behave. Inwardly she felt like a broken young woman, one who was uneasy in the company of others, whether they be demon or human. Demons sensed that something about her was wrong, and the only humans she dared to come into contact with were Giles, who detested her, and young Jeremiah. Although the latter treated her like a woman as opposed to a demon she was certain this would all change when he learnt that she was responsible for the death of his father, Benjamin Croft.

Tara lived in fear…although she barely felt she could call what she was doing ‘living’…it was more like ‘existing.’ The only reason for her continued existence was her purpose, and she would not allow herself to sink into the abyss of hopelessness and despair so long as she had such a purpose to cling to.

With trembling fingers she caressed the frayed cloth covering the small object in her hands. Try as she might, she could not suppress the memory of what she had done to obtain the item, but it had been a necessary evil.

“What is that?”

Although not intentionally loud or abrupt, she was startled by Jeremiah’s question and her shoulders twitched noticeably. She turned to find him staring at her with reddening cheeks.

“My apologies, Tara, I did not realise you were so deep in thought.”

“No apology is necessary,” Tara replied, her discomfort quickly fading as she was put at ease by Jeremiah’s straightforward and friendly manner.

“My curiosity often gets the better of me,” he admitted with a sigh, “Giles often says it serves me well as a scholar but in all other areas it renders me an impertinent young man.”

“The criticism is unjust, no one should be forced to hide a part of themselves because it makes others uncomfortable,” Tara observed quietly.

Jeremiah was taken aback somewhat by the perception of her response, he pursed his lips together for a moment as though contemplating whether to ask another question. He drew in a breath before speaking, “I do not mean to pry ever further…but you speak as if you have experience in such matters?”

“Your curiosity also makes you a terrible liar,” Tara said as Jeremiah reddened once more, “but I find myself liking you…against my better judgement of course.”

Jeremiah’s cheeks took on an even more violent hue of red but he also grinned. It was a mixture of reactions which gave him a comical appearance. He noticed a slight lift to one corner of Tara’s mouth and dared to think that she might also be smiling.

The possible smile was fleeting however as she continued with a note of regret in her voice, “When I was a young woman, probably the same age as you are now, I made a dreadful decision because I was too afraid to be myself.”

“How long ago was this?” Jeremiah pressed gently, eager to learn more about the mysterious woman, “Were Mr Van Helsing and Giles young men?”

Tara shook her head slowly, “I do not think that Giles was ever a young man and I did not know him. I did however know Abraham Van Helsing and he was indeed a young man, both handsome and kind.”

“Giles told me as much…but he would not tell me why he changed,” Jeremiah felt somewhat guilty seeking the answers from Tara when Giles had refused to give them to him. However, he could not help himself, “Do you know?”

“His sister died,” Tara replied abruptly.

Jeremiah was taken aback by the unexpected speed of her response and his mouth worked soundlessly for almost a minute as he tried to formulate additional questions or even make a simple comment. Whatever words he might have said died on his lips as it dawned on him that the blank expression on Tara’s face was masking an immense pain.

“Her name was Willow,” Tara added before she realised that, as nice as Jeremiah was, there was no way that she could continue the conversation without succumbing to tears. She pursed her lips together and bowed her head to indicate that she was prepared to say nothing more.

“You might want to ask Tara exactly how Willow died.”

Neither Tara nor Jeremiah had heard Giles come through the door. He now stood between them, a dark cloud hanging over what had been Jeremiah’s first real conversation with Tara…and Tara’s first real conversation with anyone since her imprisonment. After staring at Giles for a moment, Jeremiah turned to Tara. Her expressionless mask had been swept aside to reveal a look of absolute devastation. However Willow Van Helsing had died, it had obviously cost Tara dearly.

“You raised me to have better manners,” Jeremiah said curtly, angered that Giles would intentionally cause such distress.

“Manners only apply to humans…and certainly not to traitorous, murdering demons of that creature’s ilk,” Giles nodded towards Tara.

“She has a name,” Jeremiah muttered quietly, glancing at his mentor from the corner of his eye.

“And you have better places to be,” Giles added with some finality.

If Jeremiah had been several years younger, he would have stamped his foot with some measure of frustrated anger. As it was, he saw the look on Giles’s face and knew that this was not an issue he could force. With a curt nod in Giles’s direction he turned on his heels and made his way out of the room. He did cast one brief glance back over his shoulder as though he was worried about leaving Tara alone with Giles.

As soon as the door closed behind Jeremiah, Giles turned to Tara, “You have accomplished your task?”

He nodded towards the package Tara held in her hands and she glanced down as well, still cradling it against her body. She nodded and tentatively extended it towards Giles. He took it roughly as though she were not worthy to hold such an object. His next actions however contradicted the care Tara had taken with the package. He tossed aside the cloth wrapping and dashed the small porcelain box to the ground. It shattered into several large shards and the contents within spewed out for several feet. It was dust…grey, ordinary dust that resembled something swept up off the kitchen floor.

“You obviously had no problem gaining access to the grave,” Giles muttered, settling himself on the floor beside the dust.

Tara followed suit, a little more hesitantly as she was staring at the dust as though it were flakes of gold, “There was no one for miles…and your protection spells were easily revoked.”

“Because you knew they were there,” Giles growled.

“The task was not difficult…in theory,” Tara ignored his posturing, “But seeing her body like that…not even a body, just bones…and having to reduce the bones to dust…”

Tara shivered when she remembered the anguish Giles’s task had caused her. She glanced up into his eyes and knew exactly why he had not gone himself. He wanted her to be forced to face what she had done, to see the reality of Willow’s death and the ultimate consequences of what she had done. It was yet another form of punishment. Giles had succeeded; the sight of Willow’s decayed body would haunt her for the remainder of her years.

“Well, that is normal for people who have been in the ground for decades,” Giles replied tartly.

Tara squared her shoulders in the face of Giles’s hostility, they both had a job to do…and it did not involve trading barely concealed barbs, “Shall we begin?”

Giles did not offer her the courtesy of a reply; he merely began to speak the opening lines of the incantation. The words were ancient, written in a lost language few understood and copied into a medieval tome so rare that Giles was certain he possessed the only remaining copy.

No sooner had Giles opened the spell, its power was revealed to devastating effect. The ornate glass lamp above their heads shattered and the fragments of glass multiplied as they burst in every direction. The shards hit Tara and Giles, piercing skin and drawing blood. Giles immediately blanched, the blood draining from his face and his eyes rolling into the back of his head. Tara could only watch in horror as something appearing to be draining the magicks…and the life, from his body in front of her eyes. She did not open her own mouth, the only words that were to be said were that of the incantation…and no interruptions or deviations were permitted. If anything should happen, they would both be destroyed…and no doubt the entire street along with them.

Tara could not understand what was happening to Giles. He possessed an immense power, she could sense it…and yet he was fading much too quickly. She found herself mouthing the words in time with his but at the same time she felt her own blood grow thin as an oppressive, evil force descended on the room. While not able to shrug it off completely, Tara absorbed some of the oily sensation, it matched the darkness already present in her own veins…she knew evil when she met it.

Before Giles’s words ceased altogether Tara forced herself to concentrate enough to be able to force the incantation out from between her lips. Although it had always been Giles’s role to take the lead, Tara knew every word by rote, having repeated the spell dozens of times in the event that Giles did falter. He faltered now; the words had long since died on his lips but Tara had already picked them up, her voice just as firm as his had been.

Tara felt as though her entire body was being pierced by thousands of shards of glass as she took Giles’s burden. The pain that had engulfed him now threatened to engulf her as well.

Almost as soon as she started the incantation Tara heard angry, threatening voices in her head. They were guardians, demanding to know why one such as she would dare to disturb the peace of the dead. Tara ignored them and continued to invoke the forces that were already at work around her, dangerous, dark forces which would tear her apart in an instant should she let her guard down. With everything working against her, trying to prevent her from going against the very nature of the universe, Tara stood her ground. Where lesser and even greater magic wielders would have failed, Tara was succeeding because she believed in what it was she was doing.

Even as the words left her lips, she continually fought a separate battle in her mind, denying those who would deny her access to Willow’s soul, She does not belong to you...she has always been mine and I will take her back!

In front of her, the swirling dust was slowly drawn together into a single floating mass. Tara watched as the tiny fragments gradually elongated, moving together to create recognisable shapes, an arm, fingers, the curve of a breast. As the moments passed by and the form began to become recognisable, Tara’s jaw dropped. Forming into something resembling solidity in front of her eyes, was Willow. The form was naked and insubstantial, reflecting the fact that it really was made up of a myriad of dust particles. However, after all her years spent imprisoned, it was as close as Tara had come to seeing Willow again. The sight of her limp, lifeless shade was enough to bring burning tears to her eyes.

Tara forced herself to close her eyes on the sight in front of her as she focused every remaining ounce of strength she had to perform the last part of the spell. With Giles slumped unconscious on the floor opposite her, she had to do it alone. As Tara formed the words on her lips and the necessary images in her mind, summoning the departed soul of the dead woman back to life, she found everything flowing seamlessly, almost effortlessly. Although she was drained of much of her strength, it took very little for her to gain admittance to the soul. She reached out to the bright, intense light in her mind, pulling it forward. Very little coaxing was needed on her part; the soul came willingly, almost eagerly.

Too easy Tara mused internally…but with very little additional thought, she knew why, I love her more than my own life…she is drawn to me as we were always meant to be one, two bodies, two halves of one soul…this isn’t a resurrection…it’s a reunification…

When Tara’s eyes slid open once more, she had to keep her lids half closed lest she be blinded by the brilliant light that lit up the entire room. Even with her eyes half closed, she was clearly able to see the light settle into Willow’s limp form, moulding itself gently to every curve, to every hair. Gradually the light was fused into the body and Tara was able to open her eyes fully.

The previously limp form twitched suddenly and the brilliant green eyes blinked once. Tara then realised that the form was aware…and she was staring directly at her. Only moments passed before a look of recognition settled on Willow’s face, her mouth opened slightly in wonderment.

“Tara?” the voice was thin and barely audible, as though it was being carried across a great distance.

When Tara went to speak she found a lump in her throat. She instead settled for a weak smile and a nod that did not express a single iota of the emotions that were surging through her mind. The hazy form that represented Willow glanced around. The confusion registered clearly on her face as though she was wondering where she was.

“Tara,” the tiny voice repeated, “Where am I?”

Tara coughed to clear her throat before she could reply; it came out like an awkward sob, “Somewhere safe, Will.”

The tiny frown at Willow’s brow deepened, “Everything is so foggy…what is happening to me? Why can I not remember anything? Tara, please help me…”

Tara could not help but choke out another sob upon hearing Willow’s desperate plea, “I am helping you…trust me?”

A small smile played at the corners of Willow’s mouth, relief flooded her worried features, “I do.”

“Will…” Tara whispered, extending on hand towards the floating form, “I love you…”

The small words were lost to an awesome and sudden rush of air that whipped Tara’s hair forward over face, partially obscuring her view of Willow’s shade. For several moments she felt as though she was at the centre of a maelstrom, fighting to keep from being sucked into it. She watched as Willow’s form reverted back to dust, the tiny particles swirling furiously in the air for a moment before disappearing altogether.

The vortex was gone just as suddenly as it had appeared and everything was still once more. Aside from the two windswept people in the centre of the room, absolutely nothing else had been disturbed. The glass shards or the damage they had caused were no where in sight. The lamp still hung intact above their heads, swaying slightly. Aside from the missing dust that had lain between Giles and Tara, it was as though the spell had never taken place…that and Giles’s limp body.

Tara barely heard the door being forced open at speed but she did see the blurry form of Jeremiah rushing into the room. The young man had obviously remained just outside the door throughout the spell, waiting and listening. He fell to his knees at Giles’s side, a sigh of relief escaping his lips when he saw the welcome rise and fall of his chest. Giles was merely unconscious.

Jeremiah looked up to Tara, “What happened?”

“It is done,” Tara whispered, only in the calm did she realise that her entire body was covered in sweat. She felt it beading on her forehead, sliding down her neck and running in rivulets between her breasts.

She and Giles had done it. Somewhere, at some time, Willow Van Helsing would be born again.

~~~~~~

It took some effort, but between Jeremiah’s strength and Tara’s magickal abilities, the two of them carried Giles’s limp form up the stairs to his room. The unconscious warlock was bundled into his bed without so much as a whimper of protest. Both Jeremiah and Tara took up positions watching over him, Jeremiah in a chair beside the bed and Tara at the foot of the bed.

As she perched uncomfortably on the very edge of the mattress, feeling her shoulders sag with exhaustion, she finally acknowledged the fact that she was surprised to have outlasted Giles during the resurrection spell.

“There is something that I do not understand,” Jeremiah commented quietly without turning to look at Tara, “Why do you not leave? You would be free. Giles is in no condition to stop you, and I am most certainly not even going to try.”

“Leaving would not set me free,” the vampire replied quietly, “I think that there is a reason it was Giles who found me…and despite his feelings towards me, I think he and I must work together to protect Willow.”

“And Willow is…was…is…” Jeremiah screwed up his face for a moment before he relaxed and gave up trying, “Mr Van Helsing’s sister, who was she? I know almost nothing about her and yet everything seems to revolve around her, she must have been terribly important.”

Tara paused to draw in a deep breath, “Yes, she was…she is.”

Tara studied the young man’s expression. While she had little experience when it came to men, she knew enough to know that the earnest look in his dark eyes was intended for her. She also knew that she did not deserve such devotion and it made her distinctly uncomfortable, almost to the point of feeling physically ill. Although it was an event which had been very quickly overshadowed by what happened subsequently, she very clearly remembered killing Jeremiah’s father. The longer she studied the young man sitting next to the bed, the more she realised that the similarities him and his father were almost uncanny. Seeing the dead man’s eyes staring back at her overwhelmed her to the point where she was forced to wrench her gaze away abruptly.

“I-I am sorry Jeremiah…perhaps I am more drained that I first thought,” Tara whispered, slowly rising to her feet, she gently brushed off Jeremiah’s offer of an arm to support her and turned her head, “I would like to rest for a while.”

“Of course,” Jeremiah replied quickly, he could still see the shining tears on her cheeks and he turned his head to spare her the discomfort of staring at her pain, “I will watch over Giles and you are more than welcome to the guest room at the end of the hall…if that would be appropriate?”

Tara nodded, as she moved away from the bed she felt Jeremiah’s gaze follow her. She stopped walking, paused for a moment staring straight ahead, before finally turning back around to look at Jeremiah again.

He smiled slightly as though he had been hoping for one more glimpse of her face, ‘Was there something else you needed?”

Tara ducked her head for a few seconds, hair falling forward to hide the liquid pools that were her eyes. Coward, she thought with disgust, you should look at him when you tell him…see the expression on his face change to one of hate and loathing, after all, it is what you deserve. With some effort she managed to look at him again and she sighed sadly, already hurting to know that she was about to lose the one person that she could possibly call a friend.

“I killed your father,” Tara admitted quietly.

The air hung thick and heavy in the small room as the two, Tara and Jeremiah, faced one another. Accepting her punishment calmly, Tara forced herself to meet Jeremiah’s gaze, to watch the emotions that played out across his face.

At first he appeared to be struggling to grasp her words even though they had made perfect sense. “You what?” he asked dumbly.

Tara drew in a breath. The sensation of air filling her lungs was still something she had not yet become accustomed and each breath was somehow significant. It was also a painful reminder of the length of time she had been dead…and in many ways, she still was.

“Sixteen years ago I decided that I wanted the skull for myself, I confronted Abraham Van Helsing and your father and a fight ensued, your father fought bravely but he was young…and I was very strong. I plunged his own knife into his body. I would hope that the knowledge that it was overly relatively quickly would offer you a small measure of comfort, but I would understand if it did not.”

The look of disbelief remained on Jeremiah’s face long after Tara expected that it would change to one of anger and hate. His brow furrowed and his lips parted, the only outward sign of the myriad of thoughts that were obviously racing through his mind. As his legs gave out on him, he sank back into the chair beside the bed.

“You said you confronted Abraham Van Helsing as well…” Jeremiah paused as though trying to think through what he was saying, “Where was he when you were stabbing my father?”

Watching…waiting to seize the opportunity to ensnare me while I was occupied with the young man…he did absolutely to help, Tara clearly remembered the young man pleading with Abraham for assistance. The cries had no impact on her then…but now they pierced her beating heart with shards of pain. Tara had every right to hate Abraham Van Helsing and every motive to drag his name even further into the mud; however she could still not bring herself to forget the man that he had been and for this reason she omitted to tell Jeremiah the full truth of what happened that night. “I had already knocked Abraham to the ground, he was…he was unable to reach your father in time.”

Jeremiah then sighed quietly, wistfully, as though in that brief moment he was once again imagining a life lived with his father. However, it was gone quickly. He was a young man who knew all too well that life could not be lived in dreams.

“Thank you for telling me,” Jeremiah replied quietly, without a trace of anger or hate in his voice, “It cannot have been easy.”

“You deserved to know,” Tara replied simply, lifting her eyebrows slightly as Jeremiah failed to show the prescribed reaction. Whatever Abraham Van Helsing did or didn’t do…it was I who plunged the knife into his gut.

Jeremiah then stood but Tara’s first instincts, that he was going to strike her, were quickly dispelled when he extended his hand. She reached out and placed hers atop it. He then lifted it to his lips and pressed the tiniest of kisses to the back of her hand.

“I want you to know that I hold no grudges against you,” Jeremiah said, intentionally keeping his voice firm to ensure Tara realised he was serious, “No matter what others may say, you are no longer that demon…you are Tara Maclay once more…and you are my friend.”

“T-thank you,” Tara whispered, sincerely touched by his kindness.

She excused herself before she could give into tears once more, even though this time the tears would not have been sorrowful, and made her way to the guest room down the hall. The appearance of the room was immaterial to Tara, she could see that it contained a bed and that was more than she needed. Although she had been feeling weary ever since the spell ended, it was only when she folded herself atop the bed that she realised just how absolutely drained of energy she was.

When she closed her eyes, images of the redhead who had dominated her entire life filled her mind. As she drifted off to sleep, she knew that Willow’s face would be the only one in her dreams.

~~~~~~

When Tara woke she found, with some measure of disappointment, that night still lingered outside. As exhausted as the resurrection spell had left her, her dreams made sleep impossible for more than a few hours at a time. She sat and lingered on the bed for a few moments as though contemplating staying before swinging her legs over the side of the bed and standing with an air of purpose. It was time to leave the comfort and safety of Giles’s house and return to the night where she belonged.

Before she left, she paused at the threshold to the room where Giles lay recuperating. The door was ajar and the chair beside the bed empty. Jeremiah had obviously retired to his own bed after reassuring himself that Giles was not about to suddenly stop breathing. She did not quite know why she had brought herself into the presence of the man who despised her. After a few moments of staring at his sleeping form she realised that the sight of her would hardly be conducive a swift recovery for a weakened Giles. She was sure his tongue was still just as acidic while he was lying down.

Even as she went to turn around she saw his eyes open, he was staring directly at her. Neither vampire nor man spoke for a few moments. Tara could not think of anything to say to extricate herself from the situation in haste so she just stood up to his blank gaze.

When he finally did speak he surprised Tara with the tone and content of his words, “I know you saved my life during that spell…and I thank you for that.”

Tara inclined her head slightly, still too taken aback to say anything in response to Giles’s change of heart.

“I would also like to apologise for my treatment of you earlier…” Giles sat up slightly, propping himself up on his elbows, “You have suffered more than enough already. Do not mistake my apology for forgiveness however…”

“I do not expect you to forgive me,” Tara was quick to interrupt, she moved forward and retrieved several pillows from the floor beside the bed, as Giles leant forward she tucked them gently behind his back, “But that will never stop me trying to atone for the crimes I committed while I was a demon. Giles, I wish to aid you and Jeremiah in your work.”

“Why?” Giles asked quietly.

“I need an occupation,” Tara admitted, “And it would seem to be the only thing I am qualified for…that and the fact that I would otherwise spend my days waiting…longing for Willow’s return…and given that it could be a very long wait, it would be a wasted life.”

“We have done our part, “Giles nodded, “The resurrection will be brought about when the time is right.”

Tara nodded in agreement although it was an action which did not mirror her inward feelings. More than anything she wanted Willow to stroll back into the world immediately, as fully formed and beautiful as she had been that day at the Marlborough’s picnic. It was a fool’s dream, the world did not work in that manner…and the Willow that was reborn would not be the woman she had loved. Tara closed her eyes for just a second and brought her face into view, she inhaled deeply, as though she could smell her intoxicating fragrance.

When she opened her eyes once more she saw the look of pity on Giles’s face and remembered the tragic creature that she was. When Willow was finally reborn, she would be reduced to the role of voyeur, forever looking in on a life which was not hers to be a part of. It would be a heartbreaking existence…but at least she would have the pleasure of the knowledge that Willow was alive once more.

“Tara…” Giles paused as though he could not quite believe he had addressed her by that name instead of ‘demon’ or ‘it’, “Any assistance I can provide…or Jeremiah for that matter, he worships you, you know.”

Tara nodded slightly, “I thank you Giles…and Jeremiah also, but if I depend overly on your goodwill any chance I have of reintegrating myself into the demon community will be lost and my value to you and your work will be sorely diminished.”

“Where will you go now?” Giles asked quietly, although he knew Tara was more than capable of protecting herself; he was beginning to feel some measure of responsibility towards her, as though she had suffered more than enough already.

Tara’s soft expression changed and took on a razor sharp edge, when she spoke her voice was tinged with iron, “I believe my beloved husband would be overjoyed to see me after all these years.”


TBC in Chapter 31 - Death and Rebirth
Willow Van Helsing...saving the world since 1777Van Rosenberg II - Lord of Ice and Shadow
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Alcy
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 12 Feb)

Postby taraslove » Tue Feb 19, 2008 1:59 pm

dibs. boo-yah. I got Van Rosenberg dibs! About freaking time I got dibs for something!

Off to read now.


I like Jeremiah. I'm glad that Tara told him about his father. And her protection of Abraham's part was very well done - it's one small step for her on the road to redemption.

And I can certainly understand Giles. Not entirely able to forgive, but willing to try and get past it.

I can't wait to see what happens next. Brilliant stuff!

Oh, and:

Even as the words left her lips, she continually fought a separate battle in her mind, denying those who would deny her access to Willow’s soul, She does not belong to you...she has always been mine and I will take her back!


Wow. Just, wow.
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Re: Van Rosenberg (Updated 20 Feb)

Postby Wills » Tue Feb 19, 2008 3:45 pm

This is a beautiful story. I have been keeping up with it on another website, and now that I joined this board I can express my thanks and admiration for the author.

Alcy, this is a truly fantastic piece of writing. You write Willow and Tara's predicament in a such a way that you audience feels every emotion, and what emotions they are. I

believe this past chapter redefines bittersweet. While I appreciate Giles' loyalty to Willow's memory, I find it frustrating that he cannot understand that Tara the demon and Tara the ensouled vampire are two completely different people, and Tara should not be held accountable for her alter ego's crimes. It was not her fault she got turned. Even Willow, the victim of her deceit, would agree. So let it go Giles.

I can't wait to see what happens in the next chapter when Tara finds her bastard husband. Keep up with the great work!
"She practically had 'genuinely molded plastic' tattooed on her ass."
*Off everyone's shocked faces"
"Just tryn' out the spicy talk." - Tara in "I Was Made to Love You"
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