Interesting. I actually read very little fantasy. My wife, however, is a fantasy addict. I think she owns more books by Mercedes Lackey and people like that than I own all together and I have a B.A. and M.A. in English Literature. I’ve read probably 10 fantasy books if you count TLOTR as well. Still, I appreciate your comment that my descriptions of the culture and customes don’t overwhelm.I do read some fiction with a fantasy setting, but I’m often disappointed when authors get so caught up in the details of the world they have created that they neglect the characterization and drama of the story.
I’m glad you liked the first-person narration. I felt that it was truly the only way to go and make the story work. At the same time, I felt it became quite problematic when the history of the narration reached the present day. When Faith knocks on the door, I felt like the narration became much more troubling. Suddenly we have Tara narrating events in real-time. To me that part felt awkward.
That was very intentional. I wanted the reader to be able to understand more than Tara even through her narration.Seeing so little of Dani and not knowing her true feelings creates a wonderful imaginative space for the reader to inhabit.
Excellent. I don’t think I’ve read this concept put so clearly but yes. That scene should make clear to Tara that Dani has wanted her as badly as she did but it has the opposite effect.For me, on second reading anyway, the pivotal moment is when Dani is distraught and incoherent at the idea of being taken against her will by the lords. And Tara completely misinterprets this. She doesn’t consider that, if Dani can be so distressed at even the thought of such exploitation, she could not possibly have faked her desire for Tara for years.
Oh absolutely. Tara has no sudden change of attitude or belief. She doesn’t want to free all servants or stop making marks. She just wants Dani to love her freely. But she has no problem with owning servants or having others do so.At the end of the story Tara’s guilt seems to be focused on her perceived sexual exploitation of Willow, rather than the bonded servant practice as a whole. This makes sense. Giving characters in historical or fantasy fiction 21st century Western values can break the spell. Tara’s world is Dani, and she only really questions the customs of her society as they relate to their relationship.
I would say that of every story I have ever written this was the most interesting and helpful feedback. The questions from people about the intricacies of marks rights and how the Lord and Ladyships are handed down really helped me to make the rules clear. I absolutely agree that the feedback is incredibly rare and very valuable. It’s one reason that I think a forum like this can be treated almost like a workshop community for writers.The feedback is also fascinating to read.
Hmm. I’ve never considered a vignette but I may think about that. It’s weird because I know exactly what happens in the sequel (which includes full explanations of Willow’s geneology so it includes a story from 20 years ago as well as 80-100 years ago). Still, I feel like the prospect of writing the full story is so daunting…This is a lovely story. I would really like to read a glimpse of this world from Willow’s POV. I know that a full-length sequel would take more time than you have available, but perhaps you might consider a vignette or something similar?
Thanks so much for your wonderful feedback.
