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New Fic: Contentment

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Update

Postby Drakkenfyre » Mon May 20, 2002 11:26 am

Laurel that was one of the most beautifully written updates I have ever had the pleasure to read. The emotions of falling in love and the ability to write those emotions are a difficult thing, indeed. You did it with such grace and care. Thank you.

"In my world there are people in chains and we ride them like ponies."

Drakkenfyre
 


Promises I will make

Postby mtnlaurel » Mon May 20, 2002 2:01 pm

TrueXena, ExtraFlameyWT: There will be an update by Tuesday--what I'm actually thinking in light of certain developements...it might be necessary to post sooner than that (no promises on THAT but I hope it won't be any trouble...*wink*)



Mix: Thanks for joining us! You're not too far behind at all! Happy to have you.



Willow420: Thought...just for the fun of it, why don't you email me some spots you'd like to see our girls make it (wow, that I'm not going to edit that because it's funny) in GA, and I'll see if I can't work it in. Maybe. We'll see. Ok.



Drakkenfyre: Just so you know, been reading for a while, just never courteous enough to reply until I found out how much fun it can be.



Off to get some other work done! Later Kittens!

Laurel

mtnlaurel
 


Re: Promises I will make

Postby jdcioffi » Mon May 20, 2002 2:18 pm

mntlaurel, this is so charming. i really can't stress enough how wonderful it is ... we get the a/u and the sweet mcsweet sweet of their falling in love.



it's nice to get to see the bits we never got to see on the tele, eh?



jd

"I smell the smelly smell of something that smells smelly!" (SpongeBob Squarepants)

jdcioffi
 


Re: Promises I will make

Postby willow420 » Mon May 20, 2002 2:21 pm

What if they take the campers to six flags and get stuck on a ride together. Just a thought. ;)

--------------------------------------

A.K.A. Liz


If you're horny and you know it spread your legs.
********************
“That’s like, two drinks and a light switch away from being totally gay.” Joel from Ruth's fic: Final Exam

willow420
 


Re: Promises I will make

Postby ExtraFlameyWT » Mon May 20, 2002 2:24 pm

I know, no promises..but I really hope you DO post sooner! :bounce



-Aimee :D

*****
"Pope John Paul today confirmed his opposition to gay marriages, said they're unnatural. Gay marriage is unnatural. Then he put on a pointy hat, his dress, and returned to never having sex at all." -Bill Maher

ExtraFlameyWT
 


Re: Promises I will make

Postby VampNo12 » Mon May 20, 2002 2:42 pm

Just adding I too like the sounds of an earlier update, but whenever you post am I sure it will be a wonderful exploration of W&T falling in love.

VampNo12
 


Hooked

Postby Pudds » Mon May 20, 2002 4:08 pm

I'm hooked...More proof that Will & Tara are meant for each other no matter what the circumstances are. The romance of it all is just so beautiful.

Pudds
 


Re: Hooked

Postby tinkcrzy1972 » Mon May 20, 2002 5:00 pm

This is our girls, as they should be....please, keep up the great work, I am really looking forward to more!



Sharon

:tara + :willow = :love :bounce :love

tinkcrzy1972
 


Luvvin it luvvin it luvvin it!

Postby Lynz » Mon May 20, 2002 6:26 pm

:blush delurks :blush

I absolutely LOVE this fic!! can u tell?!?! :love :love

nicely timed happy fic with everything else happening in the buffyverse at the mo.

Luvvvvvvin it! update soon?? :shy



Lynz :bounce

x x x x x

Lynz
 


Feedback

Postby Drakkenfyre » Mon May 20, 2002 8:29 pm

Okay, Laurel, now if we are lucky and no one else post after me, the 100th post will be yours. Mayhaps, we shall be so lucky, good lady.



Well, woo damn hoo! Look at me, I got Sassy Eggs!!!

"In my world there are people in chains and we ride them like ponies."

Edited by: Drakkenfyre at: 5/20/02 7:30:45 pm
Drakkenfyre
 


Woo and Hoo! I made it to 100 posts!

Postby mtnlaurel » Mon May 20, 2002 9:30 pm

OK, because I'm so excited about this auspicious moment you all will receive a double dose. One update tonight, and then another tomorrow!!! I'll save my replies for the inbetween time, but for this evening:



Title: Contentment

Part: 8/?

Email address: mtnlaurels34@hotmail.com

Distribution: I just like to write...but it would be fun to know if this shows up somewhere else.

Feedback: This is my first fic, but I already think I'm going to be a feedbackaholic...your insights will help me steer some of the "fun" aspects of the W/T relationship *wink,wink*

Spoilers: This is completely AU! No spoilage here.

Rating: PG -13...at least for now… well, there’s some fudging on that perhaps.

Disclaimer: Yeah, so I just thought it would be fun to play with the Willow/Tara relationship. I have no rights whatsoever...most of the other characters in this fic are new, so that should be fun.



***I did a whole lotta changing and adding to get this in here tonight, but I hope you all enjoy!



Ch. 8

“What are you thinking about up there, being all silenty and stuff?” came Willow’s muffled question from her position on Tara’s stomach.



Concentrating on an imaginary line on the exposed flesh of Willow’s back, Tara took a moment to answer. “Hmm. Your freckles actually.”



Tara could see the movement of Willow’s cheeks into a grin. “What about my freckles? There are millions of them!”



“I know...I was just thinking that they’re like daytime stars. You’ve got shapes and everything.”



The blonde could feel Willow’s laughter against her belly.



“What didya find back there, huh?”



Tara shifted slightly as she reached for the felt-tipped pen on her nightstand, then moved to study the skin of Willow’s back once again.



“I only know a couple of real constellations, but this...”



Willow felt the cold touch of the pen move in lines across her back.



“...this group looks like Orion. And then this group, well...” chuckling at the image the freckles formed in her mind, Tara continued her drawing. “It looks like the man from the pedestrian crossing sign!”



Tara’s index finger moved across the lines she’d just drawn. She smiled at Willow’s intake of breath.



“I’ll have to do further investigation, of course, to ascertain any other such designs...and the patterns will change almost daily I’m sure.”



“You know,” Willow began. “Some people spend their entire lives studying the stars...”



Tara’s lips replaced the light touch of her hands, and her tongue lightly traced the lines she’d drawn moments before. Willow shook under the contact as her hands squeezed Tara’s thigh.



“I can see how one might become obsessed with the pursuit.” Tara murmured, her kisses hindering Willow’s ability to breathe.



“Indeed.” responded Willow with some difficulty.



--



“So...what do you think of everything so far?” Rachel asked as she lowered herself next to Willow’s position close to the bonfire.



Every member of the Contentment staff had made it in by dinner Sunday evening, and Willow spent much of the time being introduced to everyone. There were only a few ‘new’ additions to the staff, and Willow happened to be one of those that got special attention.



The plan was to make an early night of it. Tara welcomed everyone back, schedules for the training weeks had been given out, and now they were meeting for the first bonfire of the summer; a tradition that marked the start of the season.



The group gathered when the first stars appeared in the sky, and took their places around the fire for a pickin’ and grinnin’ session...a time to sing camp songs they’d grown to love over the years as well as other songs they just loved singing together.



“You know, I’m a little overwhelmed with everyone...they just seem to know where to go and what to do. I kinda feel lost in it all.” Willow said into response to Rachel’s friendly question.



The nineteen-year-old squeezed Willow’s arm reassuringly. “You’re doing great, Wil. You are going to love this. It’s nothing but fun tonight.”



“I’m sure it will be. I just don’t sing too well.”



Rachel laughed loudly at this. “One thing you need to know, Willow...no one sings camp songs well. It’s more like yelling together...there are a few songs that we actually attempt to ‘sing’, but not too many.”



“Well, that’s something good I guess...” Willow finally caught sight of Tara as she took position on the stump that served as the head of the circle.



Someone passed the director a guitar and Willow’s green eyes widened as she turned back to Rachel. “She plays?”



The younger woman looked slightly surprised. “You’ve never heard her?”



Willow shook her head slightly in wonder.



“She plays and sings...says it’s a prerequisite to directing a camp.”



Tara played only a few bars before the group caught onto the song and joined in singing.



Willow watched the firelight play on Tara’s skin. When the director smiled, she found herself smiling in return. The playing and singing continued on for nearly thirty minutes before the tone began to mellow a bit. The songs finally ended after about an hour, and wishes for a good night were given as dismissal.



The staff disbanded, soon after but Tara remained seated on the stump, staring into the fire. Willow moved behind the director and dropped her hands to her lover’s shoulders.



“I didn’t know you could sing...or play an instrument. It was wonderful.”



Tara reached for Willow’s hand and kissed the back of it. “Did you have fun tonight?”



“Uh-huh. The only thing that would have made me happier would have been being closer to you. I couldn’t really hear you sing, but I’m sure you were just great.”



Smiling tenderly at the remark, Tara brought Willow’s hand to her cheek and was amazed, yet again, that the simple touch brought such joy.



“It’s going to be hectic pretty much from now on. Paper work, risk management stuff, procedures, as well as group bonding activities...there won’t be another night like tonight for a little while. But it’s so good to have everyone back, you know?”



Willow dropped down on the back of the seat to straddle Tara from behind and wrapped her arms around the director’s waist.



Tara laced her fingers with those that came to rest on her stomach before adding. “And...the best part is I get to share all this with you.”



“Baby, do you really mean that?” Willow questioned gruffly.



“With all of my heart...trust me.”



--



“Willow, do you trust me?” Tara’s voice was insistent.



Without hesitation, Willow answered with a quick nod of her head.



Tara, pleased with the admission, shook Willow to get the wary woman to her look at her. “I trust you, too. Look at me!” Tara waited for Willow to hold her gaze. “I know you won’t let me fall. I believe in you—now believe in yourself…call the command for me to ‘climb on’.”



Willow looked once again at the thirty-five faces surrounding her; encouraging her. She gave one last look into the calm blue eyes that saw straight into her heart and finally gave Tara the command to begin the ascent up the ‘pamper pole’.



Tara gave a beaming smile to Willow and quickly made her way up the thirty foot pole. Once she’d reached the top, Tara carefully stood on the small platform that the twelve-inch diameter of the pole created and then communicated her readiness to jump for the bar suspended some ten feet in front of her. Willow nervously shouted that she, too, was prepared for the jump and within seconds, Tara made the leap. She purposely missed the bar, but Willow, standing down below on-belay, resisted the urge to scream and instead, held firm to the line that secured the director’s safety. Slowly, Willow lowered Tara down to the ground. The camp staff surrounding her cheered Willow’s success and Tara, after removing her harness and helmet, made her way to the center of the huddled group of people.



After the group finally quieted down, Tara began to speak: “As always, I’m very proud of each of you,” the young director announced. “This week, we’ve been learning how to trust others—sometimes a very difficult thing. Not only that, but you have proven yourselves trustworthy. Look around at the people in this group and remember this time. We spent the week learning, not just how to run a camp…we spent the time learning to trust and encourage one another…rather like a family should. I can assure you, you’ll need all the love, trust, and encouragement possible for the work you are about to engage in.” Tara stole a quick look at Willow before continuing.



When she turned her attention back to the group she said “Now…everyone, we’ve got some time before dinner so go get cleaned up and we’ll meet in the mess hall at six.”



--



While most of the staffers left the area, the six members of the Leadership Staff—including Tara—cleared the high ropes course and replaced all of the gear that they’d used that day.



Willow waited patiently for Tara during that time. As she sat, she thought back to an incident four days past:



Sunday morning, only hours before the bulk of Contentment’s staff were to arrive, Willow overheard a nervous Tara rehearsing a welcome speech. Willow had never seen Tara in such a state, stammering her way through nearly every line. She knew, of course, that Tara had had quite problem speaking when she was younger, Willow just hadn’t heard her that nervous before.



That same day, however, Willow was surprised yet again when the director stepped in front of the crowd of new arrivals and spoke without a hint of the former impediment. That Tara had been the picture of confidence and strength. Completely in control, of herself and the situation, Tara was definitely in charge. For a while, Willow just sat in awe and tried to reconcile the two facets of Tara’s personality.



And each day, she amazes me more than the day before Willow thought as she watched the director interact with the Leadership Staff.



The small group nearby met one last time with Tara for a few moments to discuss the evening’s training schedule and then they, too, left the area.



Tara, aware that Willow had waited for her, extended her hand to the redhead. “Walk with me a while?”



Willow happily took the offered hand in her own, and the two made their way around the pond in companionable silence for some time. Tara finally led Willow to the end of a dock positioned in a rather secluded corner of the small pond. As they stood together, Willow realized that they were nearly concealed from view so she dropped her chin onto Tara’s shoulder and wrapped her arms around the blond from behind.



“Thank you for trusting me,” Willow whispered close to Tara’s ear.



Tara placed her own arms over Willow’s and squeezed gently in response to her words.



“Hey Wil?” Tara asked in a surprisingly cheerful voice.



Willow made a noise indicating that she was listening so Tara continued, “Have you ever been swimming in a pond? Or are you a pool kind of girl?”



This was asked so innocently that Willow, not even having time to answer the question, never expected Tara’s next move. The director’s grip suddenly tightened on her arms and she sent both of them over the edge of the dock and into the chilly water.



While Willow came up sputtering and trying her best to make it back to the dock without drowning, Tara broke the surface in a fit of laughter.



They met at the dock, neither able to touch the bottom with their feet so they clung to the wood of the dock instead. The mirth soon left Tara’s eyes and she turned a serious gaze to Willow. “I want you to know how proud I am of you…and I’m not just talking about on the pamper pole earlier…You belong here, Wil. You’ve made a place for yourself.”



Willow couldn’t look away from the blue depths of Tara’s eyes.



Tara continued “I have watched you with the staff this week and I have been touched by your ability to care. You didn’t have to do all the training stuff, you know. Actually, everyone else already knows that, but you came and learned along with the rest of us…that means so much to me—to everyone.”



Willow had no idea how to respond to such a statement, so she remained silent. Tara could tell that while Willow remained quiet, her mind was working frantically.



Still gripping the dock with both hands for support, Tara slowly leaned towards Willow and placed a tender kiss on her lips. As Tara slowly moved her head back to look Willow in the eyes once again, she saw something there that made her breath catch in her chest. She’d seen Willow’s eyes darken with desire and yearning before, but this look was different. It shook Tara to the core.



Wordlessly, Willow moved closer to Tara so that their bodies were nearly touching. Without warning, the redhead wrapped her legs around Tara’s midsection while they both remained partially submerged. Slowly, Willow removed her hands from the dock and slid both hands into Tara’s wet hair and tilted her head back. The smaller woman lowered her lips to Tara’s neck, and the contact of her warm mouth on the chilled flesh sent shivers through Tara’s body.



There was nothing for Tara to do but continue to hold onto the sun-warmed wood of the dock, for if she let go, they would both sink simply from the weight of all of the clothing that they were wearing.



Willow continued her gentle assault on Tara, moving her mouth from the director’s neck to her ears. Tara closed her eyes and gave an involuntary gasp when Willow took the soft, cool flesh of one lobe into her mouth.



Willow eventually moved back slightly, more than pleased with the effect her kisses had on Tara and whispered in a voice thick with emotion, “You’d better be glad that I really suck at holding my breath under water, or you’d be in serious trouble.”



Tara could only stare dumbly at Willow’s lips as she spoke. Willow noticed Tara’s fascination and let out triumphant laugh.



Quickly, Willow grabbed the dock once again and unwound her legs from their position around Tara’s body.



Tara felt the rush of cold water replace the warmth that Willow’s body had provided. She remained in stunned silence for quite a few minutes as Willow moved to ladder at the end of the dock, seemingly unaffected by what happened, and climbed out of the water.



Finally, Tara began her own move to get out of the water when she heard Willow’s cheerful voice address Micah in the nearby woods.



“What happened to you?” Micah inquired of the soaked, but gleeful Willow.



“Oh, Tara was just teaching me a new game and I think I won.” Willow announced, certain she spoke loud enough for the director to catch every word.



If the purpose of the game was to make me completely lose my mind, you most definitely won Willow Rosenberg Tara thought.



Tara finally managed to climb out of the water and began walking back to the cabin she shared with Willow. Micah only sent his leader an amused look before continuing on his solo journey around the pond.



--



By the time Tara made it back to her cabin, Willow was showered, dressed, and drying her hair.



Everyone had wanted to know what happened to the director... at least it seemed as though everyone had stopped Tara as she tried to make her way to her cabin.



Tara walked through the cabin door, and straight to the bathroom. She quickly showered, wrapped a robe around herself and immediately made her way to the upstairs loft.



Willow sat on the edge of the bed and waited for Tara to speak.



The director wanted answers… “You mind telling me what that was all about?” determination brought a bit of an edge to her voice, but she quickly changed the tone. “I mean, at first, we were nice and sweet and just being near each other. Yeah, so I was just trying to have a little fun throwing us in the water, but then I thought we were getting serious and sweet again and then…you just…what was that all about?”



Willow decided to answer the question with one of her own “Tara? Do you really think I belong here?”



“Yes!” Tara responded emphatically, though clearly confused as to where the conversation was going.



“My family back home was never really big on the whole nurturing, quality time, encouraging thing…what you said about being a family really meant a lot to me.”



Willow took one more deep breath and continued. “No one’s ever trusted me the way that you do either—my friends always saw me as kind of the book-wormish, too-scared-to-do-anything geek…you never treated me that way. When I’m with you I feel like I can do just about anything—even the things I…fantasize about doing but have always been afraid of. Just once, I did what I wanted to do before I became too afraid to do it—did that make sense?”



Willow said all this rather sheepishly, with her eyes averted. Finally, she looked up to find Tara tenderly smiling at her. Just like the first day I met her. “Are you upset with me?”



Tara would have laughed at Willow had the situation not been quite so serious—mad at her? Tara wanted nothing more than to skip dinner and keep the enchanting woman in her arms for the rest of the night! “Willow, I was never upset with you…shocked, amazed, turned-on. Upset? Not for a second. Well, maybe for a second when it seemed like it didn’t affect you. Now I know better.”



Willow reached up, grabbed Tara’s hand and pulled her to sit on the bed in front of her. Willow snaked her arms around the other woman and held her close.



“So, exactly what do your fantasies consist of?” Tara asked beguilingly.



Willow held her smile as she responded, “Well, actually, I wonder what would happen if we were still in the woods all alone, no staffers around for miles. In fact, I think we might have wasted those first two weeks!”



Tara chuckled a bit at Willow’s admission and then settled back, happy to be held.



They sat quietly for a few moments, just enjoying being close to one another, until finally Willow broke the silence.



“Tara?”



“Yeah.”



“Do you have any idea what a wonderful director you are?”



The switch in topics would have floored Tara had she not become rather used to Willow’s quick subject changes.



“Why do you say that?” Tara queried, anticipating Willow’s response.



“I’ve just been watching you with the staff lately. You use your position to equip others to lead…you don’t keep them in your shadow. You don’t have to always be the center of attention. I think many people with power need to feel important, but you don’t.”



Tara blushed at the praise. “I just want people to know how special they are…there’s nothing really remarkable about me or what I do.”



That’s just the sort of thing I expected you to say, Tara Willow mused. “I know at least thirty-five people who would beg to differ. For years, you’ve been a part of most of their lives. They know you, and they still trust you completely. If I knew nothing else about you, I’d be impressed and say you were pretty remarkable.”



When Tara finally looked into Willow’s eyes, tears threatened to spill down her cheeks. All of the sunlight in the room caused Tara’s eyes to nearly glow and Willow thought she could stare at the other woman for the rest of her life and never grow tired. “But I do know more about you,” Willow whispered softly, “and I happen to think you are the most amazing woman I’ve ever met.”



The final admission prompted the tears to fall, but Tara ignored them as she cupped Willow’s face and kissed her with all the longing she possessed. Willow responded to the kiss with equal passion, soon reaching to untie Tara’s robe…



--



More to come in the next 24 hrs...but only if you ask nicely.

Laurel



(Note: That wasn't the harness bit Katharyn tauted with earlier in the posts...promises promises)





Edited by: mtnlaurel at: 5/20/02 9:46:52 pm
mtnlaurel
 


Re: Woo and Hoo! I made it to 100 posts!

Postby TrueXena » Mon May 20, 2002 9:31 pm

WOOO HOOOO! i waited so i wouldnt take your post. :)



Thank you ever so much for the Update. Now i must run off to read it. :)

---------------------

Tara: "C-can you just be kissing me now?" - in 'Entropy'

Tara: "Its good to be a chicken casserole." -in 'Answering Darkness' By: Sassette

Tara: "Evil's....good." - in 'Seeing Red' (shooting script)

TrueXena
 


Woo and Hoo! I made it to 100 posts!

Postby mtnlaurel » Mon May 20, 2002 9:32 pm

oops



Edited by: mtnlaurel at: 5/20/02 8:33:20 pm
mtnlaurel
 


Re: Woo and Hoo! I made it to 100 posts!

Postby The Rose24 » Mon May 20, 2002 9:56 pm

Another outstanding update!!!!! :bounce :bounce :bounce



You are an incredible writer!!!!! I loved W/T's little romp in the pond. Looks like both W/T are soaking up courage from each other. I hate to even bring this up, but what is going to happen when the summer comes to an end? I have an idea what may happen, but I do not want to jinx it.



:willow :love :tara

Tara: My heart doesn't stutter.

Tara: Willow, I got so lost.
Willow: I found you. I will always find you.


Willow: Hi, um Tara. I was wondering maybe you want to go out some time for coffee? food? Kisses and gay love?

The Rose24
 


Uh...

Postby mtnlaurel » Mon May 20, 2002 9:58 pm

that's why it's a story...we get to there when we get to there...patience grasshopper. Enjoy the W/T love





Edited by: mtnlaurel at: 5/20/02 9:01:12 pm
mtnlaurel
 


Update

Postby LeatherQueen » Mon May 20, 2002 10:02 pm

Oh man... that was wonderful! As always, these updates are so moving and beautiful. :) Totally loving this.








--------------------------------


"But when they're playing your song on the jukebox in Hell, you might as well dance." - K. Simpson


"Futile... like a FOX, baby!" - Tara in The Late Shift by wiccachica

LeatherQueen
 


great

Postby hopico99 » Mon May 20, 2002 10:37 pm

i've been reading and re-reading this fic, it's great. I love it. you've done a great job, it's nice to get a different willow and tara, falling in love all over again and differently but the same. blah blah i hope you understand what i mean.



peace



:)

hopico99
 


Re: great

Postby blameburner » Mon May 20, 2002 10:51 pm

Lovely, simply lovely. BTW, the changes you made were perfect. ;)



Continuing to be a fabulous story. Can't wait for more!



BB

"And remember... if you hurt her I will beat you to death with a shovel. A vague disclaimer's nobody's friend. Have fun!"

blameburner
 


FIC: Contentment: my upmost praise!

Postby LoverofLesbianCharacter2 » Mon May 20, 2002 11:15 pm

This is my first post. I have read many other works of fiction on this sight, but I am for the first time inclined to respond. I was nervous to do so at first, but I just had to reply. I expect posting will be frequent from me, from here on out. The beauty with which this prose exudes so naturally is breathtaking. Willow and Tara are so real and I feel as though I am there with them. The camp setting is magical, as I felt all those years I went to camp.



My favorite parts thus far are: Willow and Tara's early morning discoveries by the pond, their exchanges (powerful, yet simple, and full of reverance), and the moment when willow freaked out about the frogs, Tara was so gentle and yet motherly with her.



What a beautiful and unusual story. So out of the ordinary. I know many of us would enjoy even more smut :blush , but not if it takes away from your design of the story. YEA for this fiction. :)

LoverofLesbianCharacter2
 


Re: FIC: Contentment

Postby tommo » Tue May 21, 2002 12:43 am

The camp fire scene was lovely; the two of them bonding even further and wanting to share things with one another; that's heartwarming.


----------
"Smut now." - Dark Madfic Tommo

tommo
 


Re: Woo and Hoo! I made it to 100 posts!

Postby VampNo12 » Tue May 21, 2002 12:52 am

Another amazing update mtnlaurel! I love the image of Tara in the act of discovery in the beginning of this part. The gentle exploration of Willow's freckles, and seeing these freckles as patterns of stars was a wonderful image to convey Tara's continued act of discovery of Willow. Loved the lines of Willow saying "Some people spend their entire lives studying the stars...", and Tara replying "I can see how one might become obsessed with the pursuit." With this in mind, you see both W&T reveling in discovering new things about each other, and see in essence them falling in love.



The theme of trust was very important in this part. I saw the "pamper pole" as a metaphor for W&T taking a big leap of faith in trusting each other with their hearts. In a sense giving another person your heart is like falling from the "pamper pole", and you have to believe/trust that the other person will hold your heart without breaking it into tiny pieces (ie just like when Tara jumped she had the belief Willow wouldn't let her fall).



Lastly the sense of belonging was vital in this part. With Rachel you get the sense that Willow still feels like outsider especially when she was amazed that Tara played guitar and sang. However, starting with the talk at the pond and later at the cabin Tara made it clear that Willow has found a place at the camp she belonged/became "family". With this mind, Willow's actions in the pond was her way of conveying to Tara that she gives Willow the strength to try new things because she finally found someone who sees the "real" Willow. Also in this respect Willow makes it clear that she also sees the "real" Tara, who is an amazing woman who deeply cares about other people. Really I wonderful story to watch how these two change each other lives as they fall in love, and can't wait to the next update!

Edited by: VampNo12  at: 5/20/02 11:55:51 pm
VampNo12
 


Re: Update

Postby xita » Tue May 21, 2002 1:45 am

Love this fic. I love the intimacy of the freckle scene. It's a glimpse of what it is like for them and what an impact words can have.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Willow and Tara Love

Truly and Forever

xita
 


Re: Update

Postby Willowfan » Tue May 21, 2002 3:01 am

I am so loving this. It is so...different. Not in a bad way, but in a very, very good way. I'd be very disappointed if I saw even a hint of a vampire, demon, spirit or spook unless it came in the form of a campfire story!

I am totally and completely in love with Willow and Tara's love for each other! You write it so beautifully and so true to the characters!

Some of my favorite lines:

"All I seem to do anymore is grumble because of that woman," Willow said as she opened the office door and then realized, "See, I'm doing it again" and the quiet tirade continued even as she seated herself for work.



Thiat is SO Willow! It screams her! I can actually visualize her doing that!



Ah, Tara in jeans...hot. Tara in that outfit...I can't even think of the words. And I know so many words! Why can't I just think of one good word instead of "yum"?



Again....perfect Willow! You write her so well...and Tara as well. I'd quote her....but I'd have to repost the whole story!



Ok...I'm done now....Love the story, can't wait for more....doing great!

Willowfan:)



P.S.- All the stars, all the summer time outdoors stuff...The Big Pineapple will HAVE to come up...you know that, right? ;)

Willowfan:)

“Love’s bitch?” Spike asked softly...
“Woman enough to admit it,” Willow agreed with a nod and a sad half-smile.

“Cheers, luv,” Spike whispered...
-Answering Darkness by Sassette

Edited by: Willowfan at: 5/21/02 2:07:04 am
Willowfan
 


Re: Update

Postby mollyig » Tue May 21, 2002 3:02 am

Oh my. The conversation about Willow's freckles being like stars. That was just heart-meltingly (yeah, like thats a word!) lovely!





Adding up the total of a love that's true, multiply life by the power of two
Indigo Girls

mollyig
 


Re: Update

Postby Sivi27 » Tue May 21, 2002 3:51 am

I am in love with this fic. I'm serious. I come here, what, 16 times a day to check for updates? Even though I know they won't be there unless the AUT is updated. This is just so wonderful to read. Butterflies in my tummy, all the way through. Thank you so much for writing this! :)

-------
"GO GO GO: the Series." Spread the word, baby.

Sivi27
 


Re: Update

Postby Little M » Tue May 21, 2002 5:51 am

It keeps getting better and better :D The pond-scene was fantastic :D

----------------------

'I go online sometimes, but everyone's spelling is really bad..it's depressing' - Tara

Little M
 


Re: Woo and Hoo! I made it to 100 posts!

Postby pikescoob » Tue May 21, 2002 6:46 am

I would love to read some more of this amazing fic in 24 hours!! :)



--Michelle

pikescoob
 


I'm a sick, sick individual...

Postby mtnlaurel » Tue May 21, 2002 8:08 am

I was up at 5 a.m. today to be ready to watch the sunrise. It's my last week between college graduation and work and I feel all literary. So, I was sitting outside, and guess what happend? I went back in and grabbed my laptop and two batteries...and guess what I came up with? This:





Title: Contentment

Part: 9/?

Email address: mtnlaurels34@hotmail.com

Distribution: I just like to write...but it would be fun to know if this shows up somewhere else.

Feedback: This is my first fic, but I already think I'm going to be a feedbackaholic...your insights will help me steer some of the "fun" aspects of the W/T relationship *wink,wink*

Spoilers: This is completely AU! No spoilage here.

Rating: PG -13...at least for now… well, there’s some fudging on that perhaps.

Disclaimer: Yeah, so I just thought it would be fun to play with the Willow/Tara relationship. I have no rights whatsoever...most of the other characters in this fic are new, so that should be fun.



Ch. 9



The week before the arrival of the first campers was spent in intense program-area training. The entire staff only came together for breakfast and evening meals.



Willow continued familiarizing herself with the new computer equipment as well as teaching the leadership staff the computer program she’d developed. Tara, however, spent most of her time in the office making phone calls, confirming reservations, and taking care of last minute details.



Tuesday afternoon, Ed stopped by the camp office to check on the progress.



“I think we are about as ready as we’ll ever be, Ed.” Tara said with a happy smile.



Ed noted the smile, gave Tara one of his own and decided to satisfy his curiosity. “So, how’s it working out with Willow, kid? Did you get her all settled in?”



Tara leveled Ed with a look that said she knew what his game was, “You planned it all along didn’t you, you big, wonderful jerk?”



Ed continued to smile lovingly, “Tara, I promise, I hired Willow because I was impressed with her the first time I met her and I thought she’d do well at Contentment—I only hoped you two would see the special qualities in each other. I’m happy things seem to be working out.”



Ed sat across from the woman, his sister in every way that really mattered, and watched her for a few quiet moments. The blonde sat composed under his searching look.



“You’re falling in love with her, aren’t you kid?” Ed speculated in a soft voice.



Tara expelled the remaining breath from her lungs and turned uncertain eyes to her brother.



“I think that you can change the tense on that, Ed…I have loved Willow for some time—it’s like I didn’t have a choice. It wasn’t feeling; it was a decision. It makes sense to me…I was afraid at first because it happened so fast. The thing is, even if she doesn’t love me back, I’d care about her just the same. That’s how I know that it is love. I just don’t know how to say it to her…or even if she’s ready to hear it.”



Ed noticed that while Tara was unsure of what to do, she was completely confident the facts…there had been no hesitation in her voice. He knew she had a lot to deal with, so he just nodded thoughtfully and stood up. Ed hugged Tara goodbye, and kissed her forehead.



As the man reached the threshold of the office door, he turned one last time to Tara. “Hey, Beth and I are taking the kids rock climbing Friday afternoon. I know you are giving the staff the Friday and Saturday off before the campers arrive… why don’t you and Willow stop by and join us for a while?”



Tara thought about the suggestion for a moment before responding. “Willow might have had enough of the outdoors for a while, but I’ll definitely ask.”



Ed tried once again to leave, but Tara called out after him so he turned to face the young woman.



“Thanks, Ed.” Tara added with an adoring smile on her face. “For everything, you know.”



The big man just winked at Tara and disappeared from view.



--



By Thursday evening, most of the staff had already packed and left for the few days of respite they’d been given. Tara and Willow opted for dinner in the cabin, and so they shared an evening much like their first ones together. Tara cooked, Willow set the table, and they shared with one another about the day’s events.



During dinner, Tara brought up a subject she’d hesitated to ask about for days. “Wil? Um, I have been wondering about s-something for a while now…well, I guess I wanted t-to know about your job. I mean, what are you gonna do after the summer?”



Willow heard the concern in Tara’s halting voice.



What should I say to her? ‘Oh, I just thought I’d stay here with you for the rest of my life’ OOOH! Maybe I should tell her I’d give up my career to shack up with a wonderful, sexy woman I’ve known for like a month. Huh, that might not go over so well… then I’d get shipped back to California, visit companies all over the world and fix computers, get paid a good deal of money, have a big house in an actual city, and be...completely miserable for the rest of my life…I’ve got time to figure that stuff out later. What do I say now?.



Willow gave Tara a distressed look for a few moments trying to decide the best thing to say.



Tara couldn’t take the silence, so she moved to stand as if attempting to find something they’d forgotten to bring to the table.



Willow watched Tara rise and knew the other woman had been hurt by her failure to respond.



“Tara, I don’t know what I’m going to do yet. I mean, the business I’m in calls me to travel all over the place. The thing is, it used to make me happy…I’m just not sure it does anymore.”



Tara nodded her understanding. “Well, do I complicate things for you? I mean, the only thing I want is to see you happy.” With me. Happy with me would be good. Tara wanted to add.



Willow didn’t even need time to think about her response. “Tara, being here with you is the one thing that I am certain is right, right now…that probably didn’t make sense, but you know what I mean. I don’t know what’s going to happen to my career in next few months, but I know that you are supposed to be in my life. And, it-it kind of scares me, you know, that I don’t know what to do already. I mean, out of all of my friends, I was the one who always knew what I wanted; the whole overachiever, good grades, teacher’s pet deal really worked for me, but this not knowing—I don’t like it. I don’t like waiting and not knowing, but um, will you wait with me ‘til I can figure this whole thing out? I don’t want to go into it alone.”



Willow ended her speech in the tiny, uncertain voice Tara had come to love—the voice she could never say no to. “I’m sorry, we just never talk about it and I wasn’t sure how you felt or what you thought. Waiting, I can do waiting if that’s what you need.”



Tara quietly sat back down and the two women finished their meal each lost in her own thoughts.



As had become routine, Tara moved after dinner to build a fire, and Willow brought her laptop from Tara’s office to the couch and ran the long phone cord from that room to her modem.



Tara picked up a book from her selection and moved to the section of couch nearest the lamp while Willow made quick work of accessing her email.



Occasionally, actually more often than she paid attention to what she read, Tara’s eyes drifted over the rim of her reading glasses to Willow’s beautiful face. Sometimes smiling, other times intent on her work, always adorable…and Tara thought for the thousandth time that she would be happy to stay that way forever.



Willow shut down her computer and dropped the top with a click. She noted Tara’s eyes dart back down to the page she’d been reading, trying to hide the fact that she hadn’t been reading at all.



How does she make every single thing she does look so sexy? Oh, yeah. She’s sexy. I can’t decide if I like her hair up or down...but I like the glasses. Nope. Love the glasses. Love taking the glasses off. Love the fact that she waits for me to take them off for her...love that she knows I’m gonna kiss her then.



“Whatcha reading over there?” Willow asked as she moved closer to Tara’s side.



“It’s actually just a book I’ve thought about putting in the kid’s library for the fall, but I honestly haven’t been paying as much attention as I should have to what I’ve been reading…a little preoccupied.”



“Imagine that.” Willow said with a lazy smile on her face.



Tara laid her book aside, and patted the seat beside her. Willow sat down, reached over to remove the frames from her lover’s face, and placed them atop the book on the coffee table. She put a pillow on her lap and Tara immediately put her head to rest. The two just sat and stared at one another for a few moments before Tara’s voice broke the silence.



“Wil? Tell me about your dreams...I mean, I know what you do, an-and I know that you’re great at your job, but what are your dreams? Why do you wake up each morning? What have you always wanted to do?”



Sadness entered Willow’s eyes at the question, and she looked away from Tara’s face to study the fire nearby.



“I don’t remember...like, I know what I’m doing, but I don’t know why I’m doing it anymore. You, you have this huge dream to help people and you go after it...I do, and do, and do, keeping busy just so I don’t have to think about the fact that I don’t know why I’m staying busy. I was good at learning. I liked it. Somehow, I stumbled into my life...and I just make myself keep going, but I don’t know where to. That’s why I think I took the job Ed offered for the summer...I just realized I needed time to think.”



Tara wordlessly nodded her head on the pillow. I know what you mean, love. Finally, she broke the silence once again.



“You know you have a place here until you figure everything out, right? No matter how long it takes.” I want forever! But I’ll take whatever you give me.



Green eyes drifted down to Tara’s, and Willow smiled slightly. Would you get tired of me if I wanted to stay for the rest of my life? Though she didn’t say the words, Willow gave Tara a light squeeze in response.



Willow ran her hands rhythmically through Tara’s hair, and Tara traced her fingers along Willow’s forearm, which rested lightly on her stomach.



Every so often, Willow would lean down and place a chaste kiss on Tara’s lips, eyes, or nose. Not kisses of passion, just joy at being in the company of the woman she cared for so much.



At one point, after Willow had leaned down to kiss Tara, her lover lifted one hand to her head to bring them closer. When the touch finally ended, Willow leaned back just a little and asked, “So, are you tired?”



Tara shook her head and smiled mischievously.



“No? Well, then I guess it’s time for bed.” Willow supplied with a cheeky grin. The two laughingly made for a dash for the bathroom to brush their teeth.



It had become a fun game in preparation for bedtime for each woman to get ready and then have the other ‘inspect’ for the quality of cleanliness.



Willow had once remarked, “Mom should have had you around when she was first trying to teach me the value of good oral hygiene; you make all this stuff so much fun!” It soon became a running joke between the two of them.



After they’d both finished brushing teeth and drying their faces, they moved close to each other and playfully kissed. The kiss deepened, as it always seemed to, until finally one of them remembered the rule and backed pulled away. This night, the blonde had the most restraint.



“Did I pass inspection?” Willow asked with her eyes still closed.



Tara just laughed and hugged her close. “Yeah, I think we did ok.”



“So can we go to bed now?” Willow asked finally opening her eyes, which were full of hope and excitement.



“Why don’t you head on up there, and I’ll be back in just a bit. I need to go to the office for something.” Tara responded a little too easily for Willow’s comfort.



“But baby, there’s no we going to bed if I have to go up there all by myself. It’s not fair.” Willow remarked with a huff.



The director just held her smile. “I’ll let you pick out what I wear to bed…” Tara teased.



“Hmm, hardly seems fair to give me that option since ‘nothing at all’ is my choice…I can live with that as long as you hurry." the redhead added with a glint in her eye.



“I won’t be long.” the blond promised.



“See to it that you aren’t. If I have to come after you, I promise you’ll enjoy every little thing I do to you.”



They shared another laugh as they parted.



As Willow made her way for the stairs to the loft, Tara moved to the door of the cabin. She did need to go to the office, but not for work. As she’d lain in the arms of the woman she loved, Tara made the decision to tell her how she felt…but first she wanted to find the letter she’d written just after Ed’s visit earlier that week.



--



Willow heard the door close downstairs indicating that Tara had returned. The director also turned all the lights downstairs and Willow could hear her feet moving on the stairs. Only the light provided by the small reading lamp beside the bed broke through the darkness and Willow waited silently on the bed for Tara to make a move.



“I, uh, had to go find something that I wanted you to have” Come on…Make it make sense. Tara berated herself.



She slowly knelt on the bed beside Willow so that they were facing one another and tossed a piece of paper onto the nightstand.



“That's for when I don’t say all of this right...but, I w-want to try to say it first.”



Willow only slightly raised her eyebrows in question, but waited for the explanation she was sure Tara would give.



“You were wrong, Wil. About what you said earlier and me knowing what I want...you were wrong. I knew I loved kids--well, people—and I knew that camp was a place where they could be loved, and where they could grow. The thing is, I knew Momma K’s dream, but I didn’t understand it.”



Blue eyes glistened with tears of frustration at not being able to convey the message she’d hoped.



“I-I know you don’t understand that...I'm not saying it right. I just want you to know that no matter what you do, I’m going to love you. Even if you leave at the end of the summer, you’re going to be in my heart for the rest of my life, and I’ll always remember this as the time I was happiest."



Tara gave Willow a moment to process the information, and saw the moment her love understood what she was saying. “Wait. What are you telling me…?” Willow began.



“Willow, I love you... I have loved you for a while. I just didn’t know how to say it. And, and I don’t want you to think I’m saying this to make you stay here…I just want you to know that, well, I want you here. That is, I mean, if-if you want to stay.” Tara added.



The redhead could only stare at her lover, who was twisting the edge of the blanket under her bent knees in nervousness.



Slowly, Willow pushed Tara to lie back completely on their bed before resting herself on top. “Do you really mean that, honey?” Willow whispered near Tara’s face.



“Yeah, Wil…I love you.”



Willow closed her eyes tightly and pressed closer to Tara’s ear. “I love you, too. You just, you never said anything, and I didn’t say anything because…I didn’t know how you felt. Not for sure.”



“I’m sorry, sweetie. I just…” Tara stopped mid-sentence as she felt Willow’s tongue flick to the sensitive skin just below her ear and closed her eyes as she felt her lover begin to place small kisses along her neck.



Tara’s own hands moved up to the small amount of flesh exposed at Willow’s side as she stroked the skin, and felt the sharp intake of breath. “Wil?” Tara’s voice held question even as her fingers began to push to remove the obstructive pajama bottoms.



They made short work of removing that bit of clothing and Willow began to slide her fingernails slightly along the length of Tara’s legs, pushing up the material of the gown as she went.



“I’m sorry it took me so long to say the words, Willow...but every time I’ve touched you, I’ve loved you. I knew that first night...if you’d have asked me to, I would have stopped.”



Willow’s hand stopped at the soft skin of Tara’s side and her eyes met those of the woman she loved. “I know. You told me that when you looked at me...and that was when I knew it wasn’t too soon; I felt safe with you. No one has ever cared about me that much—no one but you.”



“You’ll always be safe with me...always.”



--



“As much as I like to look at you, my love, I think if we’re going to sleep, we need to turn off that light.” Tara remarked as she reached over Willow’s body to turn off the lamplight.



“Wait! I want to read my letter first. Can I read my letter first?” Willow pleaded.



Color flooded Tara’s cheeks as she shyly grabbed the note from its place beside the lamp. “I wasn’t exactly planning on being around, or at least awake when you read this...but, here.”



The blonde quickly settled her head on Willow’s thigh before she’d even had the chance to open the letter.



Willow unfolded the piece of paper and focused on the now familiar characters of Tara’s handwriting.



-My most precious friend,



If you’re reading this, I somehow found the courage to tell you my heart. I’ve wanted to tell you for so long now; the words...I just didn’t how. I didn’t know what I needed to say because I only just realized something: What contentment really is. When Momma Kris passed on this camp to me, she tried to explain the name. Happiness; satisfaction with what one has...I understood the words, but not really for myself. I wanted to help others be happy, but I didn’t know happiness or satisfaction until you.



Momma Kris passed on a legacy. Loving you has made me understand the legacy and allow that to become my dream. I think of you, and I want everyone to feel as cherished as I feel. I look out this window and down at Contentment...I always thought that this was my home. I was wrong. Wherever you go, whatever you do, you take me with you because your heart is my home. In you I find my resting place. You’re all that I’ve ever wanted...and everything that I never knew I needed.



I’ll spend my life loving you and thanking you for giving me life. I’m completely yours. Forever.



-Tara




Green eyes glistened with tears as Willow replaced the letter on the bedside stand before removing the light and shifting down beside Tara, fitting their bodies together.



“I don’t ever want to leave you, baby.” The smaller woman whispered in the quiet room.



“That’s good...I never want to let you go.”



“I’ll never ask you to. Not ever. I want to dream with you for the rest of my life.”



Tara’s fingers tightened on Willow’s arms, and tears choked her voice slightly when she spoke one last time. “There's no one I'd rather share this dream with...”

---



As I said...I'm a sick individual. There will be ANOTHER post up sometime tonight I think. Things just keep coming to my head...before they get lost, I'm trying to write them down in some shape or form. Hope you all enjoyed this update!!! Thanks for all the great responses. You kittens keep me going--in search of more W/T goodness. I'll reply to you all later. I do have to do some other real work 'cause I have a life outside of this...tehehehe



-Laurel







Edited by: mtnlaurel at: 5/21/02 7:40:31 am
mtnlaurel
 


Re:

Postby mollyig » Tue May 21, 2002 8:29 am

Firstly, I really like that you gave Tara glasses!



Each so insecure in the depth of feeling they're experiencing in so short a space of time. But then Brave Tara: I just want you to know that no matter what you do, I’m going to love you



Truly beautiful work Laurel.

Adding up the total of a love that's true, multiply life by the power of two
Indigo Girls

mollyig
 


Re: Woo and Hoo! I made it to 100 posts!

Postby pleasantlyblue » Tue May 21, 2002 8:30 am

this is me waiting very patiently for another update.

i love the way Tara is written in this fic.

-----------------------------------------------------

the girl of my dreams is giving me nightmares

pleasantlyblue
 

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