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Poetry by TheWhiz

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This archive is for Poems, unfinished fics, and other short artistic efforts of Different Colored Pens. You Can Leave Feedback!

Re: New Poem: Candle

Postby thehighpriestess » Thu Aug 15, 2002 4:49 am

Ooh, I liked this one.....slightly on the depressing side though ;)

WILLOW: Where would you go? If you felt lost
and alone? Where would you go?

TARA: To you.

thehighpriestess
 


Re: New Poem: Candle

Postby TheWhiz » Thu Aug 15, 2002 12:45 pm

Oooh look at all my replies! :shock



Steph- I'm glad you muchly liked! I'm also glad you liked the candle reference! My room is full of candles, so its probably where I got the inspiration, though if I remember rightly I wrote it during a break at work, so maybe not! :hmm



Piper- Thank you!! And ooh a clap too!! :grin



ninjitsgrrl- Thank you for stopping by & your kind words! :D



mollyig- I'm glad you liked my use of imagery, that line is one of the first that came to me & I built the rest around it! :)



P- Hey you!! Glad you stopped by and I didn't even have to remind you! :wink Sorry if you found the poem depressing, was my state of mood at the time!! :(



Once again, thanks for all of you that stop by & read my poems!! I truly appreciate it!! :heart

"I am a whiz...If ever a whiz there was"

TheWhiz
 


Re: New Poem: Bereavement

Postby Loco2 » Fri Aug 30, 2002 2:59 pm

woohoo! new poem :D



hiya :D



this was really good, very dark, but dark can be good, yes? :D



liked the rhymy bits :D



:clap :clap



thanks



steph

"I'm not gay - I'm just Trevor's bitch." - some drunken guy about his sexuality
"Oh, bugger off, you BROLLY!" - Anya to Giles on his use of the english language
"We'll all be a lot happier without the constant whining....Mom, Buffy, Tara, Waah" - DMW to Dawn

Loco2
 


Re: New Poem: Bereavement

Postby ninjitsugrrl » Fri Aug 30, 2002 3:47 pm

I like the new poem. I think the tone really captures the darkness which surrounded the end of this season especially for Willow. Don't know if that's what you were going for but I could see it. :) Good job!

"I know the answer! The answer lies within the heart of all mankind! The answer is twelve? I think I'm in the wrong building." - Lucy in "Peanuts" by Charles Schultz


My Homepage

ninjitsugrrl
 


Re: New Poem: Bereavement

Postby TheWhiz » Sat Aug 31, 2002 1:36 am

Steph- Thanks for your comments, muchly appreciated :D Yes I agree dark can be good, most of my poems are dark though I can do happy on some occasions! :grin



ninjitsugrrl- I'm glad you liked the new poem. I wrote this poem with two thoughts in mind, the first was as you thought the end of season 6 and the darkness for both Willow and the rest of the Scoobies. The second was the murder of two young girls in England, which had a nation mourning and what their families must have been going through.

Morbid I know, but the words came to me so I wrote them down. Anyway thanks for stopping by! :D

"I am a whiz...If ever a whiz there was"

TheWhiz
 


Re: New Poem: Bereavement

Postby foreverpiper » Sat Aug 31, 2002 6:57 am

Oooh! Me likeies! Very dark, but very good! hehe, i even went to look up what "bereavement" ment. :grin



It's better to be pissed off than to be pissed on. - My mantra on a bad day.


And never let it be said that I left a Tara craving unsatisfied. - Willow in Wilderness

foreverpiper
 


Re: New Poem: Bereavement

Postby TheWhiz » Sat Aug 31, 2002 11:51 am

Piper- Hey there you! I'm glad you liked the poem despite it being very dark! See I've even encouraged your learning, you now know what 'bereavement' is! :grin

"I am a whiz...If ever a whiz there was"

TheWhiz
 


Re: New Poem: Bereavement

Postby TheWhiz » Mon Sep 02, 2002 12:43 pm

mollyig- Thank you for stopping by. Your comments are much appreciated :grin

"I am a whiz...If ever a whiz there was"

TheWhiz
 


Re: New Poem: Bereavement

Postby tiredsoul » Mon Sep 02, 2002 3:03 pm

You really captured the tone of the end of this season. Tragedy strikes and you find yourself caught up in a wcicked circle that constantly replays in your brain until it consumes you. Okay, maybe I read too much into it. That's just me :grin



Bottom line: I liked it a lot. Can't wait to catch your next one.



--celia

---------------------------------



"That was just rude. Now I forget what I was saying."

tiredsoul
 


Re: New Poem: Bereavement

Postby TheWhiz » Tue Sep 03, 2002 1:40 pm

tiredsoul- Thanks for stopping by! Its nice to see a new face in my thread :grin

Thanks for the great comments. I'm glad you think I managed to capture the tone of the end of the season. I think the great thing about poetry is that each individual reader can interpret it differently or read new things into it. :D

"I am a whiz...If ever a whiz there was"

TheWhiz
 


ooo!

Postby Tara22 » Tue Sep 24, 2002 4:37 pm

love the poems!!!

you should write more of em... :D



they are all great!!

:grin



Go you!!!



oh. er. excuse the fact that this is WAY overdue, but I just read em so....



:D





Tara22
 


Re: ooo!

Postby TheWhiz » Tue Sep 24, 2002 4:57 pm

Tara22- Thanks for fishing my thread out of its murky depths!! :grin

It means alot that you wanted to read my poems (better late than never as I always say!) and I appreciate the comments, I'm glad you liked them.

I'm currently working on something now, so keep an eye out...:D

"I am a whiz...If ever a whiz there was"


"Make your own kind of music"-Mama Cass

TheWhiz
 


Re: ooo!

Postby Tara22 » Tue Sep 24, 2002 5:17 pm

no problem!!



ah! now I'm excited!! hurry with the new thing :grin

Tara: Every time I... even when I'm at my worst, you
always make me feel special. How
do you do that?





Willow: Magic

Tara22
 


Re: New Poem: Goodbye for Now

Postby Loco2 » Wed Sep 25, 2002 8:42 am

see? reply :D



well i liked it :D and the imagery :D sets a nice mood..



thanks for posting, and i'll bully as much as i can ;)

¥ ¥ ¥ Behold my symbols!! ± ‡ ¤ » †
"Oh, bugger off, you BROLLY!" - Anya to Giles on his use of the english language
"We'll all be a lot happier without the constant whining....Mom, Buffy, Tara, Waah" - DMW to Dawn

Loco2
 


Re: New Poem: Goodbye for Now

Postby TheWhiz » Wed Sep 25, 2002 8:48 am

I see your reply and thanks! :grin

Glad you liked it, looks like I'll have to return the bullying to get you to update ;)

"I am a whiz...If ever a whiz there was"


"Make your own kind of music"-Mama Cass

TheWhiz
 


Re: New Poem: Goodbye for Now

Postby pacou » Wed Sep 25, 2002 9:03 am

Lovely! :)

Kind of depressing, but peoms mostly are. And it was good. I really liked it! :)



Quote:
Time to say the things we were unable to,

Yet we speak no words- our eyes say it all.


I really loved that line, I think that is exactly what true love must be. Understanding without words.



Thank you! :)



:peace -Viv-



--------------------------

Well, we can answer questions.
Tara - Checkpoint

Dont dream it, be it.
Rocky Horror Picture Show

pacou
 


Re: New Poem: Goodbye for Now

Postby mollyig » Wed Sep 25, 2002 9:09 am

sending a shiver to my soul I liked that line.



Though the overall poem is about grief, the fact that it is goodbye for now brings hope.

Adding up the total of a love that's true, multiply life by the power of two
Indigo Girls

mollyig
 


Re: New Poem: Goodbye for Now

Postby TheWhiz » Wed Sep 25, 2002 9:24 am

Pacou- Thanks so much for your kind words :D Its always nice to see a new face in my thread. I'm glad you liked the poem. The lines you picked out were my probably my favourites as I too believe sometimes words are not needed.

Btw, I love the 'Don't dream it, be it' part of your sig, probably cos I'm am also a huge Rocky Horror fan! I'm going to see it on tour in 6 weeks! :grin



mollyig- Once again, thank you so much for your kind words :) I like to know what lines people find effective. I'm glad you recognised the hope in the poem, I think Goodbye always sounds so final, when it doesn't need to be.

"I am a whiz...If ever a whiz there was"


"Make your own kind of music"-Mama Cass

TheWhiz
 


:)

Postby Tara22 » Wed Sep 25, 2002 2:48 pm

Whiz, I really liked it!!! :D

some great imagery :grin



Edited by: Tara22 at: 9/25/02 2:39:12 pm
Tara22
 


Re: :)

Postby ninjitsugrrl » Wed Sep 25, 2002 3:37 pm

Oooh, a new poem. Great description! It made the poem so vivid. Wonderfully done.

"I know the answer! The answer lies within the heart of all mankind! The answer is twelve? I think I'm in the wrong building." - Lucy in "Peanuts" by Charles Schultz


My Homepage

ninjitsugrrl
 


Re: :)

Postby TheWhiz » Thu Sep 26, 2002 2:42 am

Thanks for all the replies :grin



Tara22- Thanks for returning to my thread. I'm glad you liked the poem and the imagery :D



ninjitsugrrl- I was thinking it was about time I posted another poem! I'm glad you liked the description used :D



Piper- hehe! I'm glad you got the poem after reading it a second time. You are not a dumbass though, my brain never functions when I'm sleepy either! Thanks for stating your favourite lines, its nice to know which people find effective!

I think you, Steph and I will have to keep harassing each other! ;)

"I am a whiz...If ever a whiz there was"


"Make your own kind of music"-Mama Cass

TheWhiz
 


Re: more comprehensive review

Postby pacou » Thu Sep 26, 2002 2:16 pm

Quote:
I'm am also a huge Rocky Horror fan! I'm going to see it on tour in 6 weeks!




Gosh, you are lucky! I only have the movie at home, but a friend of mine has seem it on tour before too, she said it was fantastic! But I mean, Rocky Horror is always fantastic, isnt it? :)



And I hope there will be a new poem soon, cos actually Im am way too lazy to go through your whole thread and read your other poems, please dont sue me, but Im really really lazy. Although Im very curious to see what kind of poems you've written before. But I wasnt able to overcome my laziness yet, maybe in some days :grin



:peace -Viv-

Well, we can answer questions.
Tara - Checkpoint

Dont dream it, be it.
Rocky Horror Picture Show

pacou
 


Re: Feedback!

Postby TheWhiz » Mon Sep 30, 2002 10:58 am

Tara22- Hehe! Thanks for stating your favourite lines, you didn't have to but thanks :grin



pacou- You should definately go and see Rocky Horror on tour if you get the chance! It is fantastic, a really great atmosphere. I saw it, I think it was 5 times on the last tour!! Its never the same!!

Tut, tut! Too lazy to read my other poems, don't worry I won't sue you! :grin . However, I seem to be only writing sad poems at the moment, so if you want to see some happier stuff, its there on previous pages, hint, hint! ;)



bulldog tidnab- Hey there! Thanks for visiting my thread :D I'm glad you liked the poems. The words you picked out seemed to be other's favourites and they are mine too! Glad you felt inspired!!

-------------------------------------------------

I'm currently working on some poems now so keep your eyes peeled!! Thanks to everyone who stops by!! :D





"I am a whiz...If ever a whiz there was"


"Make your own kind of music"-Mama Cass

TheWhiz
 


Re: Poetry by TheWhiz

Postby maudmac » Sun Sep 28, 2003 1:27 am

This is new to the archive. You can leave feedback!



To the creator of this thread: If you ever want to add something new, just email a mod and we'll move it to the active Pens board.



I have often been adrift, but I have always stayed afloat.    --  David Berry,  The Whales of August

maudmac
 

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