unregistered posted May 27, 2001 19:28
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wiccie
Cool Monster Fighter
Posts: 276
Registered: Jan 2001 posted March 13, 2001 12:06
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For this week;~)
Top ten Bogus Tara Death Spoiler
From the home office in Pine Nut, CA
10. Brazilian Bikini waxing goes horribly awry.
9. Shrunk by evil gnomes and eaten by Miss Kitty Fantastico.
8. Improper insertion of Dolls' Eye Crystal.
7. ACME safe misses the Roadrunner and falls on her.
6. Struck by lightning while playing golf in Palm Springs at the Dinah Shore Women's Weekend.
5. Three Words: tainted Scooby Snack!
4. Saves Willow by pushing Glory (and herself) into a lava pit, but return miraculously with no explanation early in the 6th season.
3. Drowned in Menstrual Life Force at local women's music festival.
2. Stoned to death by villagers.
And the Number One Bogus Tara Death Spoiler of the week:
1. Brains sucked by Glory!
You heard it here first, kitties.*G*
BBOvenGuy
Gay Now!
Posts: 1156
Registered: Sep 2000 posted March 13, 2001 12:18
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Hey, these are good! I especially like #4.
Can I play, too? Here are a couple more...
* Excessive bite injuries from making out with Spike and Oz.
* Gunned down by mysterious assailant recognized only by the half-obscured words "WB BRO__C_ST ST_NDA__S" on his clothing.
* Freak vibrating broom accident. (That one's for Darin.)
* Dies from exhaustion after weekend of passion with Xita.
Anybody else?
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Come visit Now Leaving Sunnydale - A Showcase for Buffy Fans and their Non-Buffy creations
Puff
Cool Monster Fighter
Posts: 134
Registered: Feb 2001 posted March 13, 2001 12:20
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LOL Wiccie, I can see all of them happening except the number one...not sure where you came up with that crazy idea!
wiccie
Cool Monster Fighter
Posts: 276
Registered: Jan 2001 posted March 13, 2001 12:27
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Good ones, Bob! We'll post those in next week's list. I have a sad feeling there will be plenty more to come from the Bogus Spoiler crowd;~)
Puff, I can't remember why number one inspired me so...Could be the pages devoted to it on another thread, or just the voices in my head.*G*
Hey! I rhymed!
april
Gay Now!
Posts: 1191
Registered: Oct 2000 posted March 13, 2001 13:02
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lol wiccie! you're really on a roll lately...i just keep laughing harder and harder! number four is great! ah xena, the legacy you have left us with...
but xita, look out. i hear that willow is after you now...you should have been more discrete!
Warduke
Willowhand
Posts: 397
Registered: Nov 2000 posted March 13, 2001 13:19
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Great list wiccie
#4...a plot that could only come from Rob Tapert
Buttercup
Floating Rose
Posts: 37
Registered: Jan 2001 posted March 13, 2001 14:12
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LOL, that was great wiccie and bob. Love #8, I assume you meaned she was chewing on it and choked to death right...cause where else would she put it??
I got another one.
Willow suddenly realizes she was under Tara's spell all along. With Oz at her side, Willow beats Tara to death for making her all evil and gay. Bad Tara..
This is fun...I mean after this what will the phobes say?? They will have nothing left because we used all their *Tara dies* spoilers.
Teresa
Doll's eye crystal
Posts: 72
Registered: Sep 2000 posted March 13, 2001 14:34
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wiccie, thanks for the list! I especially loved #4!!!
Teresa
rocketdyke
Doll's eye crystal
Posts: 101
Registered: Feb 2001 posted March 13, 2001 14:36
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or in a plot twist reminiscent of "the sixth sense", we will learn that tara has actually been dead all this time, having been killed off in "hush," but just not realizing it.
using her special ability to see dead people, willow will help tara finally rest in peace by encouraging tara's *obvious* romantic attraction to xander, until finally tara's ghost joins the ranks of the ex-gay. in a show of gratitude, tara ultimately sacrifices her life-force to fuel a spell by willow which will bring back both oz and riley, who team up to kill glory, thereby saving the world and re-establishing good family values and social norms.
rocketdyke
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willow: she's like, this cleavage-y slut bomb...
WbBuffyfan00
Cool Monster Fighter
Posts: 220
Registered: Sep 2000 posted March 13, 2001 14:46
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one word....EEEEEWWWWWWWW
Wiccie....you are kinda twisted (I like it)
LOL
-Amy
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"You want to take a picture of my butt?...ummm...OK...You've got two seconds." -Amber
Catwoman
Willowhand
Posts: 307
Registered: Jan 2001 posted March 13, 2001 15:14
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9. Shrunk by evil gnomes and eaten by Miss Kitty Fantastico.
I don't think Miss Kitty would eat her own mommy, she'd leave that up to her other mum
BlackLab
Cool Monster Fighter
Posts: 135
Registered: Jan 2001 posted March 13, 2001 15:39
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Wiccie & Rocketdyke, those are *so* funny! I used to check this board a couple of times a week, and now I'm on it almost daily for my regular dose of fun.
xita
Ms. Moderator Fantastico
Posts: 2674
Registered: Sep 2000 posted March 13, 2001 19:00
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I would never take Tara away from Willow. Oh, god I am lying, and I would risk Willow wiccie vengance for the shot at it
Anyalvr
Cool Monster Fighter
Posts: 240
Registered: Dec 2000 posted March 13, 2001 19:32
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Funny, I didn't know bestiality was a good ol' family value. I figured once you've dated
something that's part canine, a relatively normal, sweet, fully human girl is a step *towards* conventionality. But that's just me
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"I tried to be unlovable/why couldn't you do the same?"
-(jewel)
"Spank us 'til Tuesday! We promise to be bad if you do!"
-(drusilla, angel)
eekiboo
Nether World Anchor
Posts: 536
Registered: Nov 2000 posted March 13, 2001 19:48
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#8! LOL! and #4 reminds me of Gabrielle when she fell in the lava pit to save Xena while Xena went insane thinking she's dead! heh.heh. and a night of passion with xita? that totally cracked me up! ROTFLOL! thanks wiccie and Bob! pax
Roxton
Gay Now!
Posts: 1326
Registered: Sep 2000 posted March 13, 2001 19:55
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wiccie these are two great lists. You are really breaking me up to-night.
Dr.G
Gay Now!
Posts: 1022
Registered: Jan 2001 posted March 14, 2001 03:20
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ROFL Wiccie, you are an evil one. Actually I hear Tara croaked from laughing too hard after reading this thread.
You really should be censored. Where are the moderators when you need them? Hmmmm....posting in this thread apparently, go figure.
*note to self*: "Must watch Xena more often, that scenario sounds hilariously funny in a moronic kinda way..."
wiccie
Cool Monster Fighter
Posts: 276
Registered: Jan 2001 posted February 15, 2001 12:29
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And a few about the other Scoobs as well - I wrote these with Barron last season, and Lord Bowler's funnies inspired me to shamelessly share;~) http://www.altfic.com/subextfic/buffy/d ... opten1.htm
Kalita
Cool Monster Fighter
Posts: 130
Registered: Jan 2001 posted February 15, 2001 12:55
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LOL! Great stuff.
Slight typo in your URL - fixed it for ya: http://www.altfic.com/subtextfic/buffy/ ... opten1.htm
Kal
wiccie
Cool Monster Fighter
Posts: 276
Registered: Jan 2001 posted February 15, 2001 13:45
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Doh! Thanks Kal!
My typing skills are suffering with this week's cold & fever - yuck.
eekiboo
Nether World Anchor
Posts: 536
Registered: Nov 2000 posted February 15, 2001 17:22
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hey, i liked that 13 w/t euphemisms for sex... "doing the wiccan wiggle?!" LOL! thanks! bookmarked the URL as my fave! peace
Thespia
Floating Rose
Posts: 35
Registered: Feb 2001 posted February 15, 2001 19:13
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Regarding the sex euphemisms, I don't object to "worshipping Thespia"... They're welcomed anytime!
Roxton
Gay Now!
Posts: 1326
Registered: Sep 2000 posted February 15, 2001 19:28
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Thanks wiccie, they were great. I especially enjoyed the "Thirteen Willow/Tara Euphemisms For Sex" and the "Ten Things Anya's Learned This Season". I can see where putting Eleven hundred years as a vengeance demon on a job application might create problems.
[This message has been edited by Roxton (edited February 15, 2001).]
wiccie
Cool Monster Fighter
Posts: 276
Registered: Jan 2001 posted February 15, 2001 19:41
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You're welcome! One day I might even have the brainpower to do a list for the 5th season...But not today;~)
Lord Bowler rocks!!!
Catwoman
Willowhand
Posts: 307
Registered: Jan 2001 posted February 15, 2001 20:31
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"Nothing says 'I forgive you' like a crude hand gesture"
hehe i love that one!
oh and the top 10 rejected Buffy stories - Willow goes to band camp.
Come on, that would be a cool episode, hehe
xita
Ms. Moderator Fantastico
Posts: 2674
Registered: Sep 2000 posted February 15, 2001 23:19
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My favorites are from euphimism for sex.
10. Working as a "single delicate implement"
9. Dripping wax on the Wymmin Power Shrine
2. Eating an empowering bundt cake
ROFL!
Mara
Doll's eye crystal
Posts: 88
Registered: Jan 2001 posted February 16, 2001 01:15
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Loved Willow's 3 and 4.
And those sex-euphemisms... ROTFLOL
Thanks for the link!
Dr.G
Gay Now!
Posts: 1022
Registered: Jan 2001 posted February 16, 2001 15:42
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Oh hehehe, very funny Wiccie, I read these just now.
Somehow I am not surprised that Xita's favourites are from from euphemism for sex.
I am off to watch some of those euphemisms on the BBC again in ten minutes, WAY including driving stick this time hopefully.
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"Hello! Tarasexual now..."
[This message has been edited by Dr.G (edited February 16, 2001).]
*reposted at new board
[This message has been edited by xita (edited May 27, 2001).]
[This message has been edited by WillTara (edited July 18, 2001).]