AUTHOR: Web Warlock
DISCLAIMER: Nothing to disclaim. Joss invented all of this; I am just playing in his sandbox.
RATING: PG, if not G.
PAIRINGS: W/T
SPOILERS: Tabula Rasa and a bunch of wild-ass speculation.
DISTRIBUTION: Not yet. This is beta.
FEEDBACK: Praise is nice, but constructive criticism is more helpful
SUMMARY: Tara gets the holiday blues. Gets help from an unexpected source, and remembers better times. Special guest appearances by Danny Glover and the Four Tops!
NOTES: This started as a dream I had the other night. My dreams tend to be very vivid and detailed, but I never got the end of this one because my son woke me up so he could watch “Blue’s Clues”. Yes Danny Glover did actually appear in my dream as the unnamed police officer. I am going on wild ass speculation that Tara is in college to be a psychologist or a social worker. At least that was what she was doing in my dream. In any case I can see her in role to help out others.
I am also trying some new things based on the feedback I got from QoL.
Post-Christmas, 2001
“Well I don’t understand why WE have to do it.”, said Anya for at least the third time tonight.
“You see, darling,”, replied her fiancé, with emphasis on the last word, “we do these things because we are her friends and that’s what friends do. We help each other.”
“She isn’t going to be all mopy is she? ‘Cuase I used to get the real mopy ones on the holidays.”
Xander sighed. “I don’t know. No. Maybe. It is the holidays and we are the closest thing she has to family. Besides, after blowing off her birthday, we owe her. We are here.”
The couple got out of the car and walked up to Tara’s new place. It was small, but they expected that. Xander often wondered where Tara got her money from since he was certain her so-called family was not helping her. He hoped she was doing ok.
It was chilly, by Southern California standards, but not to bad. They got to the door and knocked. No response. Xander knocked again, this time a little harder and called out, “Tara, hey it’s Xander and Anya!” He looked over to Anya and she returned his concerned look.
“Open the door.”
To the outside person, Anya’s comment might have seemed like another of her less-than-polite mannerisms, but Xander knew her better than anyone else, he knew she was worried that something was wrong. Xander opened the door.
“Tara, hey it’s Xander and Anya. Are you home?”
“Yes.”, the reply was quiet and seemed to come from no where. The room was dark, only lit with a string of Christmas lights. It took the pair a while for the couple’s eyes to adjust. Once they did they noticed that Tara was sitting alone, in the dark. A quick look around and Xander noted that the only decorations up where the lights.
“Hey. Anya and I were going to get a bite to eat and see a movie, would you like to come?”
“Yes. We want to see Harry Potter, it should be fun to nitpick all the things they get wrong with magic.”
There was a long pause, and in the end Tara simply replied, “No.”, but after a few seconds flashed a forced smile and added “thank you.”
Uncomfortable, Xander shuffled around looking for something to say, he noticed a stack of unmailed letters and a Christmas card. All were addressed to Willow. “Did you want me to mail these letters for you? We go right by the post office. Though I think it might be a bit late for the Christmas card.”
“Willow doesn’t celebrate Christmas.”, was Tara’s only reply.
“Very true.” Was Xander’s equally brief reply. “But we can still drop them off, since you stamped them all.”
“Postal rates are due to go up soon too, best mail these now and save.”, it was the most helpful thing Anya could think of.
Tara smiled again, this time it was more natural. “No. It’s ok, I wrote those, but never had the courage to send them. Sorta like therapy.”
“Do you write to her often”, asked Anya.
“Not much, only three or four times a day.”, again a slight smile. “Thanks for coming over guys, but I would not want to be a downer on your night out. Enjoy your movie. I’m not much in the mood lately.”
“Ok. But if you need anything call Anya or me.”
“I will. Thanks again.”
The couple walked out the door and Tara could help feel a little sad. It had been the first human contact she had all day. It was nice, even if Anya seemed really uncomfortable, and she just sent them away. “Was it too late to run after them?”, she thought to herself. “No, you’ll just look like a dork, and besides being with Xander and Anya was too much like,”. She put that thought out of her head as soon as she thought of it. It was too hard. Maybe things will be better in the morning she thought. She turned from her dark and lonely living room to her dark and lonely bedroom and tried to go to sleep.
“Well that was uncomfortable.”, was Anya’s first statement when they got back to the car.
“I can’t disagree with you there. It’s gotta be tough though. Last year at this time we were all so happy. Ok we still had a bitch hell god tring to kill us.”
“Ah those were the days.”
“Seriously Ahn. We were all together for Christmas. Now, Buffy acting all strange, Dawn and Willow haven’t exchanged two civil words to each other, unless you count Willow’s frequent apologies. And Tara living in a dump even Spike would avoid. Things are not good.”
“It’s the holidays”, Anya finally exclaimed, repeating the same thing said to her earlier. “All we have now is the long dreary winter ahead to look forward too. At least in this century we have TVs, movies, and Chinese carry out to hold us over.”
“Oddly enough we had those in the last century too. But I see where you are coming from. I just hope things get better that’s all.”
Anya just patted his arm for comfort, she did not understand why her lover worried so much sometimes about his friends, she just knew that seeing them unhappy made him unhappy, so seeing them happy would also make him happy, which in turn made her happy.
The Next Morning
Tara headed out of her new place in early morning cold. She was running late and she hated it. She was never late. She knew it was only an internship, but it might help her get a real job someday.
She got to the police station and saw Captain Murtaugh was at his desk reading the paper.
“Your late.”, he said without looking up.
“I-I know, I’m-I’m sorry sir, it won’t happen again!”
He paused while considering something in the paper, he turned and looked at the young woman and smiled. “Don’t worry about it. It’s Christmas. Let’s go get some coffee.”
“Oh, I-I can get you some it’s just right outside here…”
“Tara. You are here to learn, not get coffee for cops, no matter how old they seem to you. Besides I want coffee. If I wanted warm mud, then I’ll drink the stuff here.”, again with the quick and easy smile. Tara had volunteered to work at the Sunnydale Police Department when she figured she would not be doing anything else her Christmas break. Captain Murtaugh was an older man, African-American with an infectious laugh and a wonderful family of his own. Like Xander and Anya, he had asked Tara over for Christmas dinner. Which she had declined. Later he joked that giving his wife’s cooking that Tara may be the smarter one of the two of them.
They got to the coffee shop down the street, a little place that the cops all frequented. It didn’t have the variety of coffees that Tara had been used to at the Espresso Pump, but the coffee was good and there was very little chance of uncomfortable encounters.
“You don’t have any family around here do you Tara?”, the older cop said after many deep quaffs of his coffee.
“No Sir.”, she was about to add something about them being in Alabama, but she thought ‘no they are not my family anymore. My family is here’. But it would take to long to explain.
“I understand that. It can be hard. I spent many holidays, birthdays and every other days working. If I could do it different…If you come out of this internship with one thing, I hope it is that. Spend time with the ones you love. Well that and this.” He said as he handed her a small package. “Merry Christmas, even if it is a little late.”
Tara was dumbstruck. She had not expected this. Several thoughts went through her head at once. “oh my goddess, I didn’t get him anything!” and “is this appropriate?” were the first, but the strongest was, “Oh, this is the only gift I got so far.”. Not knowing what else to do, she took the gift and unwrapped it. Inside was a small leatherette notebook with a bunch of blank pages.
“It’s a case book.”, the older man said. “It’s not real leather, ‘cause I know that bothers some people your age. But I figured if you were going to be case worker or social worker or something like that you would need one of these. Besides, you are about the same age as my youngest, Carrie.”
Tara thought a bit and then laughed.
“Your wife made you get this didn’t she?” Tara said with a knowing look.
“Caught me!”, he laughed, “She said, ‘Roger, you get that girl something or there will no presents for you either!’, just don’t tell her I got you a cheap notebook.”
“It is wonderful. Thank you.”
“Well I need to get back to work. Why don’t you go on home, maybe call your family or loved ones. Your welcome to stop by New Years Eve.”
“Thanks, Sir. I really appreciate the offer. So I’ll see you on Wednesday then?”
“Wednesday is fine. But it’s back to work, so that means on time.” He joked. “Now go, my coffee is cold, and I have a lot of paperwork to get back to.”
Tara left and walked home. Despite that fact that very little had changed, she had been reminded about how much time she wasn’t spending with her family and her only Christmas gift so far was a cheap imitation leather notebook, her spirits were lifted. It almost seemed perverse enough to be funny.
She got home, turned on the radio and proceeded to keep herself busy with a bunch of little taks. She had never fully moved in or unpacked, and there was still the issue of which classes to take for the next semester, and the report on her internship for her faculty advisor.
“Let’s see,” she said out loud. “’Today my internship mentor reminded me how painfully alone I was and it brightened my day.’ I should get an A on general principle.”
She was washing dinner dishes when it happened.
“Baby I need your lovin'
Baby I need your lovin'…
Suddenly Tara was thrust in memory to an evening this last July. She was sitting on the couch reading a book when this song had come on.
Although you're never near
Your voice I often hear
Another day, another night
I long to hold you tight
'Cause I'm so lonely
Willow came down the stairs dancing, singing at the top of her lungs. She had been wearing that silly red, white and blue top with the flag made of glitter on it, and jeans. She danced into the living room and grabbed Tara by the hands and forced her to dance with her.
Baby, I need your lovin'
I got to have all your lovin'
Baby, I need your lovin'
Got to have all your lovin'
Some say it's a sign of weakness
For a man to beg
Then weak I'd rather be
If it means havin' you to keep
'Cause lately I've been losin' sleep
Now Tara was singing with her as they danced around the living room of the Summers' home. Dawn came in from the kitchen, putting together Goddess knows what kind of sandwich, and she stood there and laughed and clapped her hands till they convinced her to dance with them.
Baby, I need your lovin'
I got to have all your lovin'
Baby, I need your lovin'
Got to have all your lovin'
Empty nights
Echo your name
Sometimes I wonder
Will I ever be the same
Oh yeah, when you see me smile
You know
Things have gotten worse
Any smile you might see
Has all been rehearsed
Darlin', I can't go on without you
This emptiness won't let me live without you
This loneliness inside me darlin'
Makes me feel not alive, honey
Baby, I need your lovin'
I got to have all your lovin'
Baby, I need your lovin'
Got to have all your lovin'
Baby, I need your lovin'
I got to have all your lovin'
Baby, I need your lovin'
Got to have all your lovin'
When the song ended all three girls laughed and went scrambling for the phone so they could call the radio station to have them play it again. Tara then had to explain to a naïve Dawn and an equally naïve Willow that it had been the Four Tops, and not Smoky Robinson as Dawn had first thought.
When the song ended this time, Tara thought back to that happier time and smiled.
“That was the Four Tops, going out from one magical lady to another, we will be back on Golden Oldies 93.5” came the voice of the announcer. Tara smiled again. She left the greasy pans in the sink, grabbed her coat and walked out the door.
Tara screwed up her courage and rang the bell. It seemed odd, she had once called this place home once. The door opened and standing there was a vision that made her heart stop. Or was start again, she really couldn’t tell.
“Tara!”, cried the slight redhead. Her excitement was barely contained, but she did, seconds later, reel it in. “Oh, did you want me to get Dawn?”
“No. I came to see you actually. Can-Do you want to go see ‘Harry Potter’? I figured we could eat a bunch of popcorn, junior mints and make fun their version of magic?”
“Yes! I mean, are you sure it’s ok?” came her excited and then cautious reply.
“It’s only a movie. That’s it, nothing else.”
“Ok. I understand. I’ll get my coat.” Willow disappeared for a bit and came back. She turned and shouted, “Buffy, Dawn, I’ll be back in a bit. Going to the movies.”
Tara heard Dawn reply, ‘Whatever’ and was certain that if Willow had said she was on fire it would have gotten the same response, she might have to ask about that later. But for now she seemed content to be with her Willow and going to a movie.
“I did not know you were such the romantic.” Anya said, handing Xander a glass of wine. She sat down next to him. “How did you know about the song?”
“Willow told me about it a day or so later. She sounded really happy then.”
There was a brief pause.
“Should I be worried that you have the request line number to 93.5 memorized?”, she asked.
“Probably.” Was Xander’s only reply.
--
Warlock
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Web Warlock
web.warlock@attbi.com webwarlock@planetadnd.com
Author, the Netbooks of Witches and Warlocks
The Other Side: http://www.xtreme-gaming.com/~theotherside/
The DnD Community Council: http://www.dndcommunitycouncil.org/nbownw
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"If that is all the Gods can do then I'm over to the Dark Side so fast!" - Tom Servo, MST3k
