It's 'Don't Wanna Go to Work' Monday, MKF 9/16/02

[Dumbsaint]

So my girl woke me up this morning snuggling up to me and informing me that she had just "called in dead." And now I'm trying to wake my butt up enough to hop in the shower and head on out to the office. In a highly disgruntled fashion, I might add.

So... what do you think Willow or Tara would say to their bosses on Mondays like today, to get out of going in to work? C'mon, I need some ideas here.

Happy Monday.

[Sheridan]

They wouldn't need any excuse, they would just soummon up a suddden unexpected snowstorm.

[lcmSilek]

No magic. Willow would insert postdated mails asking for the day off, and later go in and alter both their number of vacation days in the payroll system.

Sometimes called the "Ferris Bueller Method".

*sigh*. I put too much thought into this.
-lcm

[vix84]

Willow: H-hi, this is Willow Rosenberg. I'm calling to let you know I won't be able to come to work today.
Boss: Indeed. May I ask why not?
Willow: My little girl is sick. S-she's got a terrible cough, her bronchial tubes sound rattlely! And she hasn't spoken for, well, a long time...
Boss: Oh, I see. Well, I hope your daughter feels better. She has been very ill lately, hasn't she? *hangs up*

Willow: Heh, he thinks Kitty is my daughter.
Tara: *giggles* Now, Ms Kitty Fantastico, I'll just go and make you some chicken soup. Will is going to rub your paws with rose oil while I'm gone. OK? *kisses Willow's, then Kitty's, head*

hehe don't know where THAT came from...I must be super bored/tired/avoidy of work. Good luck getting out of bed!

[Sweetjane]

my personal favourite is the " i can't come in , i have to look after 100 baby muskrats" defence , or , a real winner - you can always use the " sorry boss , i can't come in , i have such a strong vein of unrequieted love for you , i must bask all day in my melancholia....why must i dream and always see your face?" - this not only compliments them , but scares them into taking pity on you.see , i'm full of helpful ideas.

but willow and tara on the other hand , may not be in for all the 'muskrats' shenannigans , i feel they would be more of the innocent "..i've got a sore throat.." variety. bless them. but i don't think i would take much time either thinking of a lengthy excuse when i had them snuggling up to me in bed....*sigh*

[Grimaldi]

i think they might use the classic "family emergency" excuse or the dreaded "24 hr flu" excuse

[Tulipp]

Loved the MKF with a cold scenario.

I think maybe W and T would plan ahead. You know, call and leave a voice mail message before anyone could possibly be in the office. Fake a series of ambiguously unhealthy sounds and sigh deeply a few times as they explained they were very sick.

Not that I would know. I didn't do that last Monday. Not me.

[theatremouse]

mmm i'll be back later with a theory on wt. of yet i'm clueless, but i myself am having a sort of dont wanna go monday....except its semi valid. it's yom kippur. theoretically i'm attoning. and i am. really. i'm contemplative today. (even the contemplative must fulfil obsessions and check in online at least once, but still) but i feel like i'm playing hookey, even though it's reasonable that i not go to class today because of yom kippur, because i kinda failed to email my professors about it until like midnight last night. so i'm kinda a jerk...... but still. i am jewishish, and yom kippur is VERY important. so i havnt gone to class. (extra guilt points, i have all my classes today)
hmmmmm i suppose while i'm attoning i have to atone for the fact that i was rude in telling people of import that i'd be attoning.....such a circle.
OHMYGALOSH! i just had a huge thought! think of willow, in the current timeframe that is, and it's yom kippur........oy, if she were a conservative jew she'd be pummeling herself about now........wowza......what a thought.

peace out y'all.

[relativegirl]

oh Julia, you silly girl. just tell 'em you have a doctor's appointment.

with dr. feelgood.

and back into bed with your girl where you belong.

besides, it's a major religious holiday today; it would be illegal to discriminate against you on account of your being conveniently Jewish on Yom Kippur.

which i am sure is the foolproof excuse Willow would use if she wanted to spend the day in bed with Tara today. she'd call in absent on account of needing to atone for her sins. and then lose sleep over whether using her heritage to spend the day under the sheets with her gf was some new sin she had to worry about.

[Mrs Vertigo]

Humm I think taking days off in Sunnydale might turn out a little problematic:

*Willow*:
Hello, this is Willow Rosenberg, Im calling to say that Im sorry but I cant make it to work today its my girl, she has a horrible cough and I think shes starting to change colors no sir, shes still breathing, she has to be doing that in order to cough, right? oh, Sunnydale, I suppose she really doesnt but shes perfectly alive, I assure you no, its not the one that I resurrected, thats the other woman I live with no, shes not temporarily insane either, just of the completely regular diseases no, the cancer thing is long over and just a flue what do you mean, [i:3bde66cb39] no[/i:3bde66cb39]? Shes seriously ill and I have to be with her - what do you mean sick-days overdraft!? yeah, but I was busy saving the world from a fashion victim hellgod no, I was raising someone from the dead, Id like to see you find the time - I was in magic rehab then, excuse me! its not my fault that every single week theres something sir, please, I need to make chicken soup and sir?... unreliable?!... no, sir, I didnt mean to use that tone, I know [i:3bde66cb39] youre[/i:3bde66cb39] the one thats paying [i:3bde66cb39] me[/i:3bde66cb39] sorry sir.. yes, Ill be there in fifteen minutes goodbye.

hehe

[Tulipp]

Mrs. Vertigo, I am LMAO here. Perfect.

[mollyig]

Love Willow's babblefest of an explanation [b:7108bab839]Mrs Vertigo[/b:7108bab839] [img:7108bab839]http://homepage.eircom.net/~mollyig/haha.gif[/img:7108bab839]

I didn't want to come into work today as I had to go on a stupid course to help me manage my job performance, but which actually had the result of nothing at all getting done today so I'll have even more tomorrow. Ah well. Such is life.

[Mrs Vertigo]

Couldn't resist the lure of babbling away...glad you like it

[Dumbsaint]

Hehe. Okay, so I called in. Shhh...

I actually do feel pretty lousy today. My allergies have gone a little yuckified, and for some random reason, my left eye is irritated and red. And even though I'm not working, I still have to use the better part of today to run errands. Yuck.

And I can't go jump on my girl, RG. Alas, she is being good and studying for class. *drools openly*

Schoolgirls. So, so sexy. Note to self, [i:ea6ccd39d5] distract[/i:ea6ccd39d5] her later.

[darkmagicwillow]

I loved the Willowbabble! I guess it would be suspicious missing work [i:fc0243bcc9]every[/i:fc0243bcc9] Tuesday...

[Gatito Grande]

Speaking of Yom Kippur . . .

OK, the following is a [i:ec5107116c] slightly[/i:ec5107116c] ethno/religious joke, but please take it in the [u:ec5107116c]good nature[/u:ec5107116c] w/ which I believe it was created:

[i:ec5107116c] A rabbi is on his death bed, and he's asked by a family member if they can do anything for him. "Yes" he says "Could you please bring me a ham sandwich?"

Naturally, everyone's taken aback. "Rebbe, why would you do this---eat a ham sandwich?" The rabbi explains: "Soon, I will die, and then I will see G-d face to face. The Lord will list and explain all my sins. When He gets to the ham sandwich, I'll know He's finished!"[/i:ec5107116c]


Now, in that spirit, I can see Willow reasoning "What good's a Day of Atonement w/o sins to atone? Therefore, baby, I think you and I need to work on a few more [i:ec5107116c] Evil Schemes[/i:ec5107116c]."

And we all know what Tara would say to that!

GG [i:ec5107116c] Evil's good . . .[/i:ec5107116c] Out

[kyraroc]

I'm still unemployed! WHEEEEEEEEEEE! *kyraroc runs off naked through the desert*

Unfortunately, my girl has classes today . . . and yes, Dumbsaint, schoolgirls are so hot - she was frowning over a problem set yesterday with this incredibly cute expression and all I wanted to do was jump her.

I would imagine that all the Scoobies are pretty much experts at making excuses by now . . . either that, or they simply get jobs with Tuesdays off.

--- KR

[oneyedchicklet]

Hey Julia,
Just do what I do. I just called in "too well to attend." My boss laughs at me cause everyday when he gets in I'm usually reading the paper. I have this habit of reading the obituaries first. Sick I know. He asked me one time what section I was reading and I told him that I was reading the Obituaries and if my name was there then I wouldn't be in work the next day.

My ex husband must have a popular name cause I've seen his name twice. Once he even called me telling me not to throw a party because it wasn't him that was dead. Damn, I was already on the phone with the caterers.

Enjoy your day off. I know I am.

Love to All
Barb

Sarah, my heart belongs to you!!!
I'm yours all day!!! And night too!!!

[ProducerEthan]

I was gonna say pretty much what Kyraroc said, they either have jobs with Tuesdays off that they never talk about, or Whichcraft (or lack thereof) must be a fulltime job! Self employed, of course.

P.S. - I also loved the Willowbabble!

[Sheridan]

I have got the absolute best 'don't want to go to work excuse'. Just tell your boss how much you hate the job and quit! Of course for this to work you must be prepared to sell your house, pack your belongings in a suitcase and set off travelling with the proceeds. Hey it works for me, or will as soon as the buyer exchanges contracts.

[Enigmatic]

I never stay home from work, not unless I feel very sick, and that's almost never. It's not because I love my job, it's just that I don't work much, and I REALLY need the money.

Barb? I will hold you all night if you let me...I love you!

[Mrs Vertigo]

I have the most disgusting job... *whimpers* vacations. I'm still in school so I'll be mostly working vacations.

Speaking of which, [i:1c3c24b712] what are[/i:1c3c24b712] Willow and Tara's job? Internet help desk? Resident charm and hex maker? Sandwich wrapper in the cafeteria? Cmmon guys, take your shots!

[Elianna]

I don't think that Willow and Tara work. If they were to, I would have NO idea what.

And for those of you Jewish Kitties, remember outside of Israel, Yom Kippur is honored as having two days, so you can take tomorrow off, too.

And Ms. Vertigo, I noticed in the Las Vegas gathering thread, you said that you lived in Israel. I was there this summer, and I have to say, it's looked the worse I've ever seen it. Not safety-wise, but morality wise.

It's just so depressing. My stepmother and I are trying to convince my father to move back to the US, but he doesn't want to.

Anyway, stay safe, and if you ever want to talk, you can email me. elianna_358_1999@yahoo.com

-Elianna

[WebWarlock]

Well. I am at work now and I don't want to be here.

Bright side, is my student who is supposed to be taking the make up final tonight has not showed, so I get to split in about 15 mins.
Bad news (for him) is I have to give him an "F".

I can see Willow teaching at the U ala Sass' "Vingettes" series. Tara. Well I always thought she would make a good psychologist or social worker, but now I am leaning towards something like Lisa's idea in "Milestones". Ok I better stop before this becomes a fic recomendation thread!

Could some one enlighten me and remind me what Yom Kippur celebrates/honors. Sorry for my ignorance, I just forgot.

Have a good one Kittens!

Warlock

[WiccansIllusion]

The buzzer was going off. The buzzer on the alarm clock had been going off for the past two hours. Not to mention the phone had been ringing. Of course, the missing duo had decided to take a shower together, since showering together saved time in the morning, didn't it? Giggling errupted from the steamy shower stall, even long after the water had gone cold.

Frusterated, Anya hung up the phone finally. Both Willow and Tara had promised to help her in the Magic Box that morning, but obviously they were screwing around. And why not screw around when you had someone to screw around with. Making up her mind, she turned off the lights, wrote out a sign for the window, posted it and locked the door.

Several moments after that, Dawn and Buffy showed up. Buffy was armed with Mocha's and Dawn with donuts, but both of the Summer sisters looked to each other bewildered that the shop wasn't open an hour later then it should be, and saw the sign Anya had written:

Out to Lunch.

[Elianna]

Yom Kippur is like a Jewish Day of Atonement. It is the end of the ten day period where we were supposed to ask everyone for forgiveness for sins that we committed against them, and ask G-d for forgiveness for sins committed against G-d and humankind.

Usually, Jews fast on that day, and spend all day in Temple (depending on how religious one is) and hence, no work.

I hope that this is descriptive enough. I didn't want to spend pages writing an essay on Yom Kippur. (Oh, and it's pronounced "Yom (rhymes somewhat with home) Key-poor" not "yam kipper" which I've seen on tv shows a bunch unless you come from a very religious background from the East Coast).

-Elianna

[WbBuffyfan00]

Well of course I don't want to go...but I must say it really is nice to be able to say I have a job to go to. For everyone who is still unemployed I wish you all the luck and send good job hunting vibes your way.

-Amy

[browneyedgirl]

I don't think I've ever called in sick to work on a day I was actually sick. I ration my sick days so that when prospects more appealing than work come up, I can take advantage. When I'm *actually* sick (which is rare) I just tough it out at work.

I imagine Tara would have a hard time calling in sick if she wasn't really; she'd just feel too guilty.

As for Willow, she would call in, tell some horrendously bad, obviously false, incredibly convoluted story that wouldn't fool a five year old child.

[friskylez]

How about its "I shouldnt have gone to work Monday"...
Sheesh what a fucking day, District manager in to do an audit of my inventory and to tell me that the associates need training..

My response is duh, what do you think ive been saying since ive been here for three weeks and why did the old manager keep their job? This has been going on long before i got there.

Geez luiz Rome wasnt built in a day..Its amazing how quickly upper management can point the finger, but will take none of the blame...Can you say should have replaced the old manager ages ago..

I keep wondering "why did i come back to work for these clowns"...Insane much

[zero]

Well, I'd rather like to call in sick to work tonight but seeing as though it's the first shift of a job I've only just got (after a long and dull stretch of unemployment) I probably better turn up! It's just suckful because I actually am less than stellar in health right now.

Mind you, getting fired before I've even started would beat my previous personal record of three days before being sacked!