TITLE: Like Nobody Knows You
AUTHOR: teeth (all lowercase)
STORY RATING: PG to NC-17
CHAPTER RATING: PG-13
DISCLAIMER: I don’t own these characters. I’m just borrowing them for a sec.
SUMMARY: Willow/Tara “workplace romance” & "friends to lovers" AU. This is gonna be a little slowburny but it’s worth it. Hopefully.
FEEDBACK: Yes please but be nice. I'm not really a writer. I just write what I wanna see.
SPOILERS: None. I made all of this up.

NOTE: Almost nothing remains from canon. Family dynamics are pretty different. I won’t explicitly mention parental abuse, but it is heavily implied to have happened before the events of this story, so take that as your warning.

First chapter is a little short but the rest will be longer, probably. I'll try to update weekly but I also might forget.

Thoughts in italics.



Willow looked in the mirror, trying to psych herself up for her big day. She finally got a job after months of applying everywhere in the city. She wasn’t really sure what they did at this place. Something about typing? They hired her on the spot, transparently admitting they just needed “butts in chairs”. Not a huge self-esteem boost, but money is money.


Stupid Willow. Coming out when no one’s hiring. “Should I get a job first? Noooo, no, they’ll take it really well.” Yeah, right.


She quickly ran a brush through her hair and adjusted her collar on her button-up shirt, wishing she had asked about the dress code. She threw on a sweater and briskly walked downstairs, very carefully avoiding eye contact with her parents. If she left now she’d be an hour early, but she couldn’t stand another second in that house. She silently got in the car and started her long commute.


This is gonna suck.

---

“Good morning, Willow,” said Willow’s new boss as she walked in. Was her name Samantha? Sally? Sarah? Why don’t they wear name tags here? “You’re early. You can’t clock in until 7.”


“I know. Just getting ahead of traffic!” Willow replied, trying not to seem too nervous. She settled on stiffly holding her hands to her sides like a robot and breathing as little as possible. It’s hot in here. Why is it so hot in here?


“Alright. Well, since you’re here, I might as well introduce you to your supervisor. Go to her with questions about your job, and come to me with questions about payroll, benefits, whatever. Legal stuff. Otherwise don’t bother me because I don’t know anything about what you do. Cool?” Samantha/Sally/Sarah reached into her pocket. “Oh, and here’s your temporary badge.”


“Thank you, ma’am,” Willow said as she clipped it to her shirt. “When do I get my permanent one?”


“Ask your supervisor.”


“Oh, sorry.”


“Don’t be,” her boss smiled. “We’re happy to have you here. Hold on just one second. TARA.”


“Here, I’m here, I’m coming!” shouted a voice Willow couldn’t see yet.


“Thank you, dear,” the boss shouted back. “Tara will be your supervisor. You’ll get along. You’re both dressed very… weather-unconsciously,” she said with a smile.


Willow suddenly remembered the concept of weather and realized she probably looked ridiculous with her three-layer outfit in 100 degree heat. Duh, that’s why I’m hot. “Oh, well, you know what they say. Fashion before function! Not that I think I’m fashionable. Or that I care about fashion at all. Really I just don’t have that many clothes, and I—”


She stopped in her tracks as her new supervisor approached. Her hair was light brown, barely below her shoulders, but still covered most of her face. She was wearing dark blue jeans and a long-sleeved tie-dye shirt. She looks hot. No, not— I mean— temperature. She looks like she’s too warm. Do I look like that? Do people think that when I wear a lot of clothes? She should wear fewer clothes. I mean— oh boy. No. Not like that. Willow released the breath she’d been holding since she got there.


“Hi. Willow? I’m Tara. Your new s-supervisor,” Tara smiled politely. “Um, don’t get too used to me though. I’m… My schedule is changing soon, I’ll be w-working evenings, so… s-so you’ll only be on my team for a few m-months.”


“Nice to meet you, Tara,” Willow said. She should be nervous, but she’s not anymore. Just really, really hot. “So, I’m gonna be honest, I don’t know what to do. Like, at all.”


“Oh, um… No problem. That’s h-how all of our new hires feel,” she replied. “Here, I’ll show you where you c-can sit. Um… I get my own desk, b-but you don’t, so it’s k-kind of first come, first served. B-but…” Tara looked down nervously. “You can s-sit near my desk. For today. So I can sh-show you what to do. But it— it might not be open every day.”


Willow smiled. “That sounds great! Where do you sit?”


“In the b-back. I’ll walk you there. It’s the one with the um… The one with the c-cats all over. Cat statues. You can’t miss it.”


“Cats! I love cats! The animal. Not the musical. I mean, the musical is fine. I don’t think about it too often. I heard the movie was bad but I can’t see how they could’ve messed it up because the musical is all about the spectacle. So just have spectacle and you’re all set. I didn’t see the movie. But my parents have a cat. I mean, I have a cat. I live with them. That sounds really lame but I have a job now so it’s not that lame. Not that I judge anyone who doesn’t have a job. This is my first job. At 22 that’s probably a little embarrassing so I can’t judge anyone,” Willow didn’t know why she couldn’t stop talking, but by the time she finished her tangent, they had arrived at their desks. “Sorry. I like your cats. A tasteful amount of them.”


Tara giggled. It was the cutest giggle Willow had ever heard. “Y-yeah, I like cats too. The animal. The m-musical was fine. I like S-Skim— um… Skimbleshanks.”


“The railway cat!” Willow blurted out. “That’s the best one!”


“H-he has a good song. It’s my favorite. So um… Right. Your job. Basically, you t-transcribe these phone calls. For the hard of hearing. Um… It sounds hard, but it’s really not. They’re conversations and most of them are s-slow. Don’t be scared!” Tara quickly added, seeing how overwhelmed Willow looked. “It’s super easy. A-and you get a lot of training. Two weeks. It’s um… s-self-paced. So you just log in and do the classes. And there will be some t-tests that you send me and I’ll grade. A-and then you’re ready for calls.”


“Are you sure it’s easy?” Willow nervously tugged at her sleeves. “It sounds hard. I’m not really good at… things.”


“Oh, it’s really easy. The h-hard part is doing it for 8 hours a day. B-but calls are slower now than when I was on ph-phones. We hired a lot of people. So you don’t get that m-many,” she reassured. “You’ll be f-fine.”


“Have you seen The Ring?”


“What?”


Willow realized that train of thought only worked in her head. She felt unqualified to explain her own reasoning to somebody else, so she decided to not even try. “The Ring. It’s a good horror movie. Or so I’m told. I don’t like being scared alone so I haven’t seen it. But um, I want to. And I’m off at 4:30. So I was hoping you’d do me a favor and watch it with me if you’re also off at 4:30.”


“I’m off at 3 today.” Tara tucked some of her hair behind her ear.


“Oh.”


“But y-yes. I mean, I haven’t s-seen The Ring. And I’d— I would l-love to. I’ll meet you in the b-break room after your shift. I hang out there a l-lot.”


“Okay! Yes! I mean…” Willow didn’t want to seem too eager. “Yeah, sure, that works. Um, I still can’t clock in. Too early.”


“Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot. Y-yeah, definitely don’t start working off the clock,” said Tara. “Want me to show you where they keep the free snacks?”


Willow smiled. “Yes, please.” Maybe this job won’t be so bad after all.

_________________

Love to see a new fic on the board and great to see you posting!

I'm always super intrigued to see Tara in a position of power above Willow and how it plays out. I can see Willow is still very much stuck in insecurity which hopefully Tara will bring her out of! I'm laughing hard at Willow bluring out about 'The Ring', now there's a way to get them huddled close together!

Looking forward to seeing where you'll go with this!

_________________
Amber Benson killed me once.

Check out my finished fics

Love, The Series … Two For Joy/21+/Joy To The World … Dancing With Dimensions

Inevitable/Infinitely …Confidential Eternal … A Twisted Date … Dachsund Through The Snow

Wooo hoo! Fresh story time! Very intrigued by the premise and loving the babble! Can’t wait for more!

_________________
- I am a poster girl with no poster, I am 32 flavours and then some -

Hello,

I see you have said yes to feedback.

While feedback hosts a dictionary definition, the word means very different things to different people. To help assist readers and yourself with how your work is interacted with could you please answer some questions? (Depending on your answers some questions may not need answering).

Would you like positive only feedback? This includes but not limited to; best moments, happy feelings, and obvious compliments. E.g. OMG when Character A did B thing I went squee! You’re so talented!

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If you have not updated in a while would you find a “Just reread, can’t wait for more! Is there an ETA on the next chapter?” rude or supportive?

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Do you welcome an analytical view, looking deeper into themes and metaphors? E.g. The parallels between character A and C are such tangents due to action but emotionally it's really bringing in a cohesiveness for the overarching theme of X I’m feeling

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This is to better aid your story interactions and overall experience of posting at the KB. Writers and readers all have preferences, this is not to single out icks or unwanted feedback habits but more to give an understanding of preferred communication styles regarding your work.

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This questionnaire is a very early draft, any feedback please contact Dub.

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_________________
One Shots - Basement Grotto - Door 25 - "You're My Always" - "Do You Like Cats?"
You don't have to write to contribute to the board, feedback can be its own event - Dubs Festive Advent Challenge - Fic Club - Pens Write A Holiday Story
Existing at some point, maybe - The Justice for Tara series.
*Rides in on a tricycle* Wanna play a game? - Five Minutes of Artistic Integrity - Those Three Little Words - Sassy Synonyms - Aradia's Antonyms

Holy moly, Dub! If I were the writer I would feel pretty overwhelmed by this huge catalog of questions.

Personally I hope teeth will find the time to write a new chapter first before writing an essay in response to you...

I really like the start of the story.




That's a cool boss - not very helpful, but cool! That is good because I can't imagine such a boss will react uptight when employees start dating each other.


I love Willow's inner babble, so cute! And Willow's outer babble as well:





So either your version of Willow isn't the smart genius, straight A student Willow normally is written as or she has an extremely low self esteem.


I'd like to know how she got on that tangent.


Yay for them already spending their free time together! I'm looking forward to their first "date".

Wow, thank you everyone for your kind responses! No update just yet, I do have a chapter ready but I'm exercising restraint (plus it's not proofread, kinda recovering from a two-day migraine here and if I have to Google "where does the punctuation go in quotation marks" one more time my head will explode). Update should be coming Tuesday. But I wanted to respond before I forget everything!

Laragh:


Thank you! I hope you'll enjoy



Confession: This is a barely-adapted version of the first time I asked my girlfriend out, except instead of "The Ring" it was "Sonic the Hedgehog 2". Much less romantic.

Thank you for reading! Super honored to hear your feedback.

GrimCityGirl:



Thank you so much!

Dub:

Thank you for asking! I'm comfortable with all of those forms of feedback and discussion (especially SPAG!!), I'm not picky I'll highlight a couple for elaboration



Negative feedback is definitely welcome, but I loooove positive feedback also, and am a big appreciator of the "sandwich method" (e.g. "I love what you did with X! The delivery's a little clunky. But still super cute!" and such)



Kind of. I will accept and listen to all forms of advice, but I usually only post a story if I have a super clear idea on where it's going, so things are usually unlikely to change. Posted chapters are mostly final. But suggestions on improving wording and stuff are welcome and will be considered!



Very supportive, I love those comments! Unfortunately I have a lot of health issues so I can't promise it'll always be given a straight answer (most common answer will probably be "next update will happen when my eyes can focus again"). But I do find those comments very motivating

Thank you for reading!

Will's redemption:



I like to see teeth!Willow as "generally smart, could be anything she wanted to be, but she's extremely aware of and insecure about the things she doesn't know". Kind of an "A+ in comp-sci and sociology, dropped out of beginner Spanish" type.

Thank you so much for reading and your feedback!

_________________

This is a very cute start and I love a slow burn! Plus, great title- can't wait for more!!

_________________
You ARE Magic ~ Tara

Thank you, shirrey! <33

CHAPTER RATING: PG-13
NOTE: Hello! Posting from work so let me know if I accidentally attached some confidential government files. Turns out this chapter isn't that long either, sorry. If I left any typos, let me know, & also blame my beta.

---

---

“Willow!”


“Tara!”


The two girls excitedly greeted each other as if it had been weeks since they’d spoken, even though it had only been an hour and a half.


They were both holding two cups of coffee.


Willow laughed. “Wow. Sorry. We’re more alike than I thought.”


“I’m r-relieved. I was worried you’d be all like, ‘I hate coffee, why would you assume I like coffee,’ or something,” said Tara, smiling from ear to ear.


“We’re gonna be up all night!” Willow blushed. “Because of the coffee. Or maybe because of The Ring. Or both. Both will be factors, I’m sure. What’s the plan, by the way?”


Tara sipped from one of her coffees. “We could w-watch at my place. I live a-alone. Usually. My s-sister stays over sometimes. But she’s not here today. So we’d be a-alone. Or we could go to y-your—”


“No!” Willow said a little too quickly. “I mean, no, that’s okay. We can go to your house. Um, is it okay for us to hang out outside of work? I don’t want to get you in trouble.”


“Oh, y-yeah. I don’t actually, um, have any power over you or a-anything? I mostly j-just babysit. Make sure you’re not, um, asleep on the job. So, I can be f-friends with the um— the people on my team.”


“Friends,” Willow smiled. She hadn’t had a friend in a long time. “Good. Good, I’d like to be friends.”


Tara smiled back. “M-me too. Um, I’ll drive and you can follow me. I um… I d-don’t get paid a lot, so s-sorry about my neighborhood. In a-advance.”


“No worries, Tare. Let’s go! Cursed video awaits!”


Willow followed Tara to her apartment, nervous for reasons she pretended not to understand. After only about a five minute drive, they arrived. Tara led Willow into her apartment, quickly picking up some blankets from the floor and clearing off the couch. “Th-this is my place. You can, um… You can take your shoes off, if you want.”


Willow looked around like a kid at Disneyland at Tara’s one bedroom, 700 square foot apartment. “You live here? All by yourself?”


Tara smiled nervously. “Y-yeah. For about a year and a half.”


“No way! You can afford all this on your salary?”


“Well, f-for now. Rent was $700 when I moved in but it— it keeps rising. It’s $900 now wh-which I can k-kind of afford. But they’re p-probably gonna raise it to $1100 th-this year. I m-might have to find another p-place.”


“That sucks. Maybe they’ll give you a raise?”


Tara laughed a little too loudly. She noticed Willow’s confused face and stopped abruptly. “Sorry. Sorry. No, they d-don’t do that.”


Willow chuckled. “Yeah, it was a longshot.”


“Y-yeah,” said Tara. “So, how do you um… How do we watch the movie? Is it on N-Netflix?”


“Oh, yeah. It’s on Prime,” Willow replied. “We can use mine. You can stay logged in too. I don’t mind.”


“Are you s-sure? We just met.”


“Of course!” Willow exclaimed. “Just don’t buy a lot of movies. Obviously.”


Tara smiled and handed Willow the remote. “Sounds like a d-deal.”


“Sweet!” Willow said as she started the arduous process of logging in. “So, you said your sister comes over sometimes. Are you close with your family?”


“K-kind of. I’m the oldest of three. I l-love my siblings. I have a fine relationship with m-my parents. We’re j-just— we don’t talk very much. But my sister comes over almost every w-week. Well, less since she got a g-girlfriend. They hang out a lot.”


“Girlfriend?” Willow didn’t want her surprise to accidentally be read as disgust, so she continued. “Right. She’s gay. That’s cool.”


“Bi, technically,” Tara said. “I guess it runs in the f-family. I’m a lesbian.”


Willow’s eyes widened. “Oh! Oh, that’s neat. I’m— I’m not— I’m not gay,” she said before she remembered where she was. Alone with Tara. Safe. “Okay, yeah, no, who am I kidding? I’m— I’m gay, too.” It felt good to say it.


“O-oh. Cool,” Tara said. “How long have you been o-out?”


“There was a ‘coming out and going back in’ process. I’ve been back out for about… 45 seconds. You?”


“Oh. Well, I’m p-proud of you,” Tara blushed. “Um… I’ve been out for a-about ten years.”


“Ten years? That’s crazy!” Willow gasped. “You came out in, like, middle school?”


“Y-yeah. Well, high school. I was 14.”


“Wow,” Willow was impressed. She didn’t know that was allowed. “Did your parents take it okay?”


“Eventually. They were w-w-weird at first,” Tara smiled gently. “But they c-came around. It, um— it helped that I didn’t d-date much. So they c-could just ignore it until they got used to it. Did… Do you not have a g-good relationship with your p-parents?”


Willow froze. She shook her head, less as an answer and more to ground herself. “No. I mean— we’re fine. It’s fine. Oh, look, the movie’s starting.”


Tara took the hint. She settled into her seat and got ready to watch.


Less than ten minutes in, Willow already had her shirt pulled over her eyes.

---

By the end of the movie, Willow was curled into a ball, her head on Tara’s lap. Tara had gotten her a blanket to hide under during the scarier parts, which she had definitely been utilizing.


“Is it over?” Willow said as she nervously peeked her head out from her blanket cover.


Tara smiled gently. “It’s over. Did you l-like it?”


“It was the best movie ever! From what I heard, anyway. It was soooooo scary I thought I was gonna explode! I’ve never seen anything like that before!” Willow’s fear was replaced with excitement as she quickly sat up. “That was so cool! I’m glad I didn’t have popcorn or I would’ve spilled it everywhere! Were you scared? You didn’t seem scared at all!”


“Oh, movies d-don’t scare me that much,” Tara replied. “But it was good. I liked it.”


“Me too!” Willow smiled sadly. “Well, I guess I should get going. Sorry to bounce so fast. It’s just— my mom will worry.”


“R-right,” Tara smiled back. “Are— I’m n-not trying to stall, b-but do you want dinner? It’s late.”


“Oh, no, that’s fine. I have dinner at home,” Willow lied. She planned on eating a bag of chips and half a pack of Oreos in her room, again. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Do you work tomorrow? If you don’t then I guess I won’t see you tomorrow. Obviously. Not like I’ll just drop by your place unannounced. Unless— I mean, I can drop by. But it’d be announced. Um— I don’t have a phone. Temporarily. So I’d have to announce it in person, so I can’t come over until we work together again. But, um… I’ll have a phone when I get my first paycheck. So, temporary. Like I said, obviously. And then we don’t have to wait until we see each other at work.”


During this babble, Tara had grabbed some leftover pasta from the fridge and put it in a small pie tin. She wrote her email address on the lid. “You’d be d-doing me a favor taking this. I made too much. I just— I still haven’t f-figured out how many servings one package makes. Just microwave it. It’ll be g-good. And um— you can email me whenever. And I’ll be at work tomorrow f-for sure.”


“Oh. Oh wow, thank you,” Willow said. “I— thank you. I’ll see you tomorrow.”


“Bye, Will.”


Will…


Willow got in the car and looked at the time. Just past 7. Shit. She popped in whatever CD she grabbed first and started the long drive back home, trying desperately not to think about how badly she wanted to stay.

---

“Willow. You’re home late.”


“Yeah, sorry. Worked late,” replied Willow, staring at the floor.


“Fine,” Mrs. Rosenberg said with a sigh. “If I find out you’re lying to me—”


“What? You’ll kick me out faster?” Willow mumbled under her breath.


Willow could feel her mother’s eyes piercing her skin. She didn’t look up. Mrs. Rosenberg noticed. “What did you say?”


“Nothing. I’m going to bed.”


“Keep your door open.”


Willow quietly made her way up the stairs and into her room. She pulled out Tara’s pasta and ate it cold in bed. She pulled out her laptop and put on an episode of Xena: Warrior Princess— the musical, specifically. She set the laptop on her bed and laid down next to it.

Gamble the worth of you on the rebirth of you
Don't turn away, don't start to fade
What's still unwritten… You can erase

As usual, she was asleep before the first song ended.

_________________

Love, love, love Willow's a Xena fan. One of my favorite things to headcanon is Willow and Tara sharing gay culture (canon wise I imagine Tara introducing Willow to the music, characters etc and that's how we get 'strong like an amazon') but I would love to see Willow and Tara talking Xena here! (I'm assuming Tara is aware since she's been out since high school)

Willow's home situation though, ouch! What's happened there? Have they tried to send her to some kind of pray away the gay camp? Why does a grown adult have to keep her door open? Or report why she's home late? I'm hoping it's not something more sinister like to prevent Willow hurting herself. Although that kind of controlling parent is sinister in and of itself.

So glad to see Willow getting a small reprieve in her time with Tara. I hope over time she trusts Tara enough to let her into her situation and they can try and get out of it together!

Well done for continuing this on!

_________________
Amber Benson killed me once.

Check out my finished fics

Love, The Series … Two For Joy/21+/Joy To The World … Dancing With Dimensions

Inevitable/Infinitely …Confidential Eternal … A Twisted Date … Dachsund Through The Snow

I have a better idea, Tara: take Willow as a roommate! Although I guess that Willow's salary is lower than Tara's I hope that she could afford half the rent. That girl desperately needs a new home!


AWWW, so cute!


Willow's babbles are so adorable!


So sad that Willow feels the need to lie instead of just saying: I spent some time with my new colleague after work. I guess she feared that would lead to an interrogation by Sheila?


I don't like Sheila talking to Willow as if she were a troublesome teenager instead of 22 years old. And how cold is Sheila that she doesn't ask her daughter if her first day of work was good. Willow needs to move out of her parents house asap!

Sorry the update's so late. I just quit smoking, finally! But it meant I was in bed with a headache for a couple weeks.

Thank you for your feedback!


Laragh:


This is my headcanon, too! I can't wait until I have an excuse to write their Xena-nerding. Tara's definitely familiar



I'm sure they believe they're protecting Willow, in their own way... But rest assured, her situation becomes clearer, and definitely improves!



Our girls always find a way to make each others' lives better



Thank you so much!

Will's redemption:



I've done the calculations, and it is possible We'll see!



Thank you so much! It's kinda hard to capture the spirit of her cute babbling, haha. I hope I'm doing a good job!



I'm sure Tara will take her as a totally-platonic-roommate as soon as legally possible (darn lease rules...)

Thank you so so much!!

---

Update Below

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_________________

CHAPTER RATING: PG-13ish
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Does everyone write Willow this oversharey or is that just me? + Sorry this one's short again. Aforementioned cold turkey headache.

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Chapter 3

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Willow went into work two hours early just to wait in the break room for her shift to start. She looked around at all her coworkers. Heating up lunch, calling their spouses, doing their schoolwork, playing table tennis with their friends. What did she have? Parents that hated her. 60 credit hours for a major she hated. A splitting headache.


She sat on the couch and stared at the break room TV. It was playing some Adam Sandler movie she didn’t recognize. How did people survive without cell phones? I’m going crazy.


“Willow?”


Willow jumped before she recognized the voice of her new friend. “Tara? Hey!”


“Wh-what are you d-doing here? It’s w-way too early,” Tara looked concerned. “Are you okay?”


“Oh, yeah, yeah. Super okay! Great, I’d say. More than great,” Willow stood up and put her hands in her pockets. “I just haven’t gotten the hang of the traffic. Wouldn’t want to be late.”


“You gave yourself two hours of wiggle room?”


“Yeah! You can never be too careful. You know what they say, early is on-time and on-time is late!” Willow tried to change the subject. “What are you doing here? Don’t you start work later than I do?”


Tara smiled. “I left my w-water bottle here. Kinda couldn’t go another s-second without it, it’s a weird attachment thing, so… um… I c-came here as soon as I got ready. I was about to g-go back home. Want to, um…” Tara’s cheeks turned pink. “Want to come hang out with me for a wh-while?”


“Oh,” Willow took a second to process. “Oh! Yes, yes, that would be so cool.”


“Okay! Wanna go for c-coffee? Just— since you have to be back in a couple h-hours. We couldn’t really do much at m-my place.”


Willow bounced a little bit. Coffee! A real hangout! And I didn’t even have to beg! “Sure! Can you drive? I hate driving.”


Tara playfully rolled her eyes. “I suppose.”

---

“So, did you go to college?” Willow asked between sips of her caramel macchiato.


Tara tapped her fingers on the table. Willow recognized the rhythm as Tequila. Interesting choice. “Art school. I’m an i-illustration major, ceramics minor,” Tara took a bite of her mediocre egg sandwich. “Obviously d-didn’t help my c-c-career. How about you?”


“Dropout,” Willow smiled shyly. “Temporarily, I think. Just had some stuff come up. But I’m theoretically a computer science major.”


Tara looked over at Willow with kindness in her eyes. “What h-happened? If you don’t mind me asking. You c-can ignore me. Sorry.”


“No, no, it’s fine. I don’t mind talking about it,” Willow nervously tugged at her sleeves. “Some stuff at home kinda made my brain do some things,” she said, staring at the table. “Not super serious— like, I wasn’t in danger or anything! But I couldn’t really handle the school thing.”


Tara could tell she didn’t really want to say more. She didn’t push. “I’m sorry you w-went through that. If you want to go b-back just let me know. They tell employees that schedules are s-set in stone until the next q-quarter. But there are s-secret exceptions for students,” she held her hand out across the table, leaving it up to Willow to grab it or not. “And I’ll b-be here. For, um… e-emotional support. I mean it.”


Willow held back tears. She couldn’t remember the last time someone was this kind to her. She placed her hand on top of Tara’s. “Thank you. That means a lot. I’ll let you know.”


Tara, sensing Willow’s discomfort again, decided to change the topic. “Do you like your c-coffee? I’m glad you d-didn’t get food here because it’s, um… not very g—”


“I’m bipolar.”


“What?”


Willow really needed to work on this staying-on-topic thing. She made a mental note of it. “Sorry. Sorry. Yes, your sandwich looks poisonous. I’m glad I didn’t get one,” Willow smiled despite herself. “Everyone says not to disclose mental illnesses to your bosses unless you have to but you’re not really my boss and I decided that it’s better if you know. Both as a friend and as a supervisor in case I use all my paid time off in a week so you don’t think I’m dead or something. Um…” Willow took a deep breath. “Obviously that’s why I dropped out but I wasn’t diagnosed until way after. I’m really bad about oversharing so I hope you’re not freaked out. I’m normal, I promise. I’m managed.”


“Oh,” Tara smiled kindly. “It was really b-brave of you to tell me. I know it’s s-stigmatized,” she took a sip of her coffee. “But it’s n-not a big deal, sweetie. I m-mean, I’m sure it is for you. But… um… what I mean is it’s not a big deal to m-me.”


“Really? You’re not freaked?” Sweetie…


“No,” she looked at her watch. They should start heading back soon. “N-not at all. You can tell me if you n-need any… um… accommodations at work. I can t-talk to Sandra.”


Sandra! That was her name. Sandra, Sandra, Sandra, Sandra. “Thank you. I don’t think I need anything.”


“Good,” Tara smiled again. “C-come on. I’ll drive you back.”

---

“How was t-today’s training?” Tara asked as she packed up her stuff for the night. She spent an hour and a half after her shift playing games on her computer so she could wait for Willow. She hoped Willow wouldn’t notice.


“Oh, good, good. Went over contractions today,” Willow replied. “Kinda crazy to devote an entire unit to spelling ‘you’re’ and ‘y’all’.”


“Most people here c-can’t spell to save their lives,” she said lightheartedly. “They have to cover every c-case.”


Willow laughed. “For sure. Hey, what are your plans for tonight?”


Tara smiled and bounced on her heels. “N-not much. Probably j-just doodling and watching trashy TV. Wanna c-come over?”


Willow nodded quickly, before remembering her circumstance and shaking her head. “I mean, I want to. But I have to get home. Maybe tomorrow?”


Tara’s smile turned sad. “That’s o-okay. I u-understand. I’m off tomorrow. But soon.”

---

It was shortly after 10PM, and Willow sat in her room, headphones on, scrolling through an ancient music forum. She liked reading the drama. Just as she was getting to the juiciest part (sleazoid248 just called a moderator a “helpless bonehead idiot”) she was interrupted by a loud bang coming from her parents’ room.


She ran over, fearing the worst. Her mom had been sick and could’ve fallen out of bed. The cat could have run into something and knocked it over onto its own head.


She arrived to see her mom sitting on the bed and her dad looking embarrassed. “What happened? Are you okay?”


Sheila Rosenberg sighed. “Your father threw his phone in the wall.”


“What?”


Sheila pointed at the wall. “Phone. Wall. They ought to put this in an advertisement for those phone cases.”


Sure enough, her dad’s phone was there, stuck in the wall. He was silent. “Why?” Willow tried to hide that she was shaking.


“Nothing to worry about. Go back to bed,” Sheila said, uncharacteristically apologetic. “Sorry for startling you. I appreciate you checking.”


“It’s okay,” Willow said. “Can I go to the school library?” She always found great success asking for things right after they fought.


“Alright. Keep it down when you come back.”


Willow ran back to her room. She grabbed a backpack and stuffed some clothes and her laptop inside. She didn’t need much. She just needed a night off.

---

“Willow?” Tara opened the door and rubbed her eyes a little. It wasn’t quite bedtime, but she already had her t-shirt and sweatpants on for the night. “What’s up? A-are you okay?”


“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Can I come in?” Willow said, trying not to cry. “It’s not a big deal. Really isn’t. And I know we just met. But can I stay over? Slumber party? I can sleep on the couch, obviously. It’s okay if that’s not okay. It’s really not a big deal, like I said.”


Tara stepped away to let Willow in. “Of c-course,” she muted the TV and went to the kitchen to get her scared friend some water. “D-do you like Family Feud?”

_________________

Oh poor Willow </3

The very first fic I started writing was about a bipolar Willow, based on my own experiences of being bipolar, and I lost it all in a hard drive meltdown. I decided to scrap it and went a different route but I'm very interested in seeing how this bipolar Willow deals with life!

I'm so glad she has support in Tara already. Can't wait to see them bond more!! (read: )

_________________
Amber Benson killed me once.

Check out my finished fics

Love, The Series … Two For Joy/21+/Joy To The World … Dancing With Dimensions

Inevitable/Infinitely …Confidential Eternal … A Twisted Date … Dachsund Through The Snow

I'm glad that Willow was so brave to tell Tara about her mental illness right at the start of their friendship. And Tara's reaction was perfect!

I assume that Willow has medication - she should keep proper mealtimes and eat proper food to balance the meds. Hopefully Tara can help her with that in the near future, too.



Poor Willow, so distraught! She needs a big Tara hug. I hope that she will be brave once again and tell Tara about her dire situation at home.

Hi everyone! I really intended for updates to be less sporadic but I kinda think posting fanfiction is some type of curse. Like life throws every inconvenience it has at you when you decide to post on a schedule.

Laragh:



That's so cool! I'm bipolar also and I've really wanted to write a bipolar character for a while. I've just been putting it off because I'm the only bipolar person I know, and I'm scared of accidentally passing off my personal bizarre brain as The Bipolar Experience. Like, accidentally spreading a myth that bipolar people all dream in musicals every night or something. Hopefully I've got it down by now... but if I ever write a sentence like "Willow knew that, because she was bipolar, it was only natural that she eat a pumpkin empanada every morning for breakfast," please call me out! haha

Thank you for reading!!

Will's redemption:



I think Tara brings out a boldness in her for sure! Partly because of her kindness, and perhaps partly because of some feelings she brings out in Willow...



I'm really excited to show them helping each other!

Thank you so much for commenting!!

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Update Below

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_________________

CHAPTER RATING: PG-13ish

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---

Willow gingerly sat on her new friend’s couch. She looked down at her hands and started absently picking at her nails. This was the first time she’d had a friend since high school and she probably ruined it by just barging into her home. After I promised I would announce! Now I look like a crazy person who doesn’t keep their promises to not drop by unannounced! She pulled her prescription bottle out of her jacket pocket and looked at the label. Once per day, twice as-needed. She shook one of the tiny pills out and swallowed it, trying not to be too obvious about what she was doing out of embarrassment.


Tara sat on the other chair, tossing a small stress ball back and forth, only occasionally glancing towards Willow. She wasn’t sure how much she’d want to talk about it. Between Steve Harvey quips on the TV, she quietly spoke. “D-do you need anything? We can, um… play a game or something. Or we can t-talk.”


Willow looked up. “I don’t wanna talk about it. It’s not a big deal,” Despite saying this, Willow couldn’t stop herself from talking. “Parents were fighting again, definitely about me. I hope I didn’t worry you too much. I’m not in danger. I just can’t sleep in there when they fight like that,” she subconsciously brought an arm to her mouth and started chewing on her sleeve. “They don’t like me. Feels like they’re fighting about who hates me more. But it’s okay. I’m not in danger. Not since I became an adult,” she suddenly noticed her chewing and stopped. “Sorry. Gross. Nervous thing.”


Tara got up and sat by Willow, being careful not to get too close. “I’m s-sure they don’t hate you. Here,” she handed Willow a stick of gum. Willow smiled in appreciation.


“They do. Or they at least don’t like me. But it’s okay,” Willow shrugged, shaking a little. “They loved me growing up. My own fault they stopped.”


“It isn’t,” Tara responded quickly. “It c-can’t be. There is nothing you could’ve done to cause that,” she said, hesitantly putting her hand on Willow’s shoulder. “We don’t have to k-keep t-t-talking about this. If you don’t want.”


Willow nodded quickly. “Yes. Please. Sorry. Um… What are your plans for tomorrow?” She started chewing on her sleeve again. The lights felt blinding. Every passing car felt like it caused an earthquake. Her heart was trying to escape her chest. What were the signs of a heart attack again? Is one of them being tired? No, you’re being stupid, you’re fine.


“My s-ssister’s coming over, actually. Said she’d bring her g-girlfriend,” she draped a blanket over Willow’s shoulders and put her slightly-cold water bottle on her lap, hoping it’d provide best-of-both-worlds benefits. Willow didn’t seem to notice either of them.


“Oh, oh, cool,” Willow nodded, trying to do the breathing exercises her old therapist taught her. “That’s cool. What… um… was her name again?”


“L-Luna. Her g-girlfriend is Emma, but she g-goes by Em,” Tara spoke quietly and evenly, noticing Willow looked overwhelmed.


“Tara and Luna? Your parents really like the cosmos,” she replied. “I like to joke that if I had a brother he’d be named Common Persimmon,” There we go. Horrible Willow-jokes. You’re okay. Back to normal.


Tara giggled. “Yeah. She p-picked her own name though.”


Willow’s eyebrows furrowed. “How come? Did they name her something dumb like Asteroid?” she thought about it for a second. “Actually, Asteroid would be pretty fun. It’s not unlike Astrid, which is a name. A dumb one would be Satellite. Wait, that’s kinda cool too. She could go by Sal. Um…”


Tara smiled and cut Willow off, which Willow was very thankful for. “N-nothing like that. She’s trans.”


“Gender?” Willow was surprised, but she didn’t want it to read wrong, so she clarified. “That’s cool. That’s neat. Luna’s a good choice. Is it because of the book?” she desperately hoped Tara had also read that book by Julie Anne Peters or she’d look like a fool. That is what that book was called, right? It wasn’t, like, Elizabeth or something? Oh god, what if I’m wrong… I don’t want to seem like I don’t read. Oh god, what if that book’s actually crazy offensive? It has been like five years since I read it. Why do I ever say anything?


“Oh, no, I th-thought that too. I loved that book,” replied Tara. “But no. She l-loved Looney Tunes as a kid and, um… thought it’d be an easier transition— no p-pun intended— because Mom and Dad already c-called her Looney. Plus, cute m-matchey names.”


Willow let out a sigh of relief. I knew I didn’t make that book up. I’m not crazy! “That’s so cute. How about your other sibling, does their name match?”


Tara was surprised Willow remembered her other sibling. “Wow, you’re a g-good listener. Um… Kind of, but I th-think it was an accident. His name is L-Leo. Since Luna came out we’ve been j-joking that he should be glad our parents didn’t, um… name him Capricorn.”


Willow laughed heartily. “That was a good one.” She looked at her sleeve, which she just noticed had gum on it now. Oops. “Can I use your restroom?”


Tara nodded in understanding. “Of course. R-right down the hall, last door on the left. Um…” Tara’s cheeks turned red. “Sorry m-my apartment sucks. It’s embarrassing. There’s a c-crazy leak in the bathroom, um… S-something to do with the AC I think?”


“No big,” she replied. “I don’t mind. Thank you!” She speed-walked to the bathroom to start trying to pick the gum out of her shirt. She made a mental note to stop doing this to her clothes. I could get one of those teethers for babies or something.


She looked at herself in the mirror and combed through her hair with her fingers. She found herself staring blankly at her reflection. She spoke aloud to herself. “What am I doing? This is stupid. You’re stupid. She’s practically a stranger. You can’t just expect this of someone you barely met. This is why you don’t have friends,” Willow splashed some water on her face. She’s so nice. She must like me. Would you let someone you hate into your house? Don’t be so hard on yourself. She’s a friend. Newness aside. You’d do the same for her. Is that crazy? I think I’m crazy. No I’m not! This is how friends work. Right?


When she’d finished unsticking the gum to the best of her ability, she walked back to the living room. How do I walk again? Oh no. I’m breathing manually now. Blinking, too. Okay. One step. Two steps. I need to sit down. She sat next to Tara on the couch and smiled weakly. “Hey.”


“H-hi,” Tara smiled back. “Sleepy?”


Willow nodded. “Yeah. What’s… um… the call out policy at work? I might not feel up to it tomorrow.”


“Oh, that’s easy,” she said, going into supervisor mode. “Y-you just call the call out line. No penalty as long as you c-call before your shift starts. They’re usually, um… overstaffed, so they don’t care. You can also just email me— to my work email of course— a-and I’ll make sure it’s all set. Has to be email, you can’t just, um… t-tell me in real life. G-gotta be in writing so the managers know I’m not just ‘s-saving your ass’.”


Willow sighed with relief. “Okay. Cool. Good. I might do that. I don’t know.”


“You’re welcome to h-hang out with me and my sister. As long as you promise not to be… um… weird.”


“Why would I be weird?” Willow looked confused, before realizing what she meant. “Oh! The trans thing.”


Tara nodded. “The trans thing. I’m v-very protective of her. So… D-don’t be weird. I mean, I t-trust you. But she’s s-sensitive. She’ll pick up on weirdness.”


Willow quickly nodded. “Oh yeah. For sure. No weirdness here. I won’t even bring it up. Oh, and, um, speaking of not bringing things up,” she stared at her hands again. “Could you not mention my situation? Any of it. I don’t want your sister to think your new pal’s a mess.”


“You’re n-not a mess, sweetie,” Tara put her palm on Willow’s back and rubbed up and down. “But, of c-course. I wouldn’t tell a-anyone your business. I’ll m-make something up if they ask why you’re here so early,” she stood up, turned out the lights, and brought back two pillows and three blankets. “I, um… don’t know h-how you like to sleep. Sorry about the world’s l-least comfortable couch.”


“Thank you,” Willow got cozy and smiled up at Tara. “I think the couch is great. Perfectly Willow-sized.”


Tara giggled as she saw that Willow was right; when she stretched out, her head and feet perfectly touched both ends of the couch. “Cutie. Well, I’ll just be in my r-room if you n-need me. F-feel free to keep the TV on if you need noise.”


Willow was already half asleep. “Mhmmm… The bitter and sweet of it…”


Tara beamed. “All in the lips that you kissed.”

---

Willow woke up in a cold sweat. She was pretty sure she had just screamed. Well, that’s embarrassing. Hopefully I didn’t. She sat up to look at the clock on the stove, which was just barely visible from the couch. 4:33 AM. Well, I’m up. She wanted to treat her new friend to breakfast, but it felt rude to cook in her kitchen, and she couldn’t leave the apartment without Tara, since she wouldn’t be able to lock the door behind her.


Willow settled on the next best thing: sitting silently and unmoving until Tara woke up, at which point she could buy her breakfast. Lucky for her, after only five minutes of the “act like a rock” routine, Tara came out of her room.


“Willow, y-you’re up early,” Tara rubbed her eyes. “Are you okay?”


Willow nodded. “Nightmare. Why are you up?”


“Because I’m crazy,” Tara smiled. “I d-don’t need much sleep. And I like, um… Watching the sunrise.”


Willow tried not to look jealous. She missed all-nighters, waking up at 3AM to cram, midnight snacks, and all manner of fun nighttime activities. But she learned the hard way that if she doesn’t get good sleep every night, or at least 6 nights a week, her brain will turn upside-down. She was forever doomed to a life of going to bed by 11PM. Bedtimes, decaf coffee, no drinking. Sometimes she felt like a 12 year old. “That’s cool. Can I buy you breakfast? I haven’t gotten paid yet so nothing really fancy but I have a lifetime of birthday money.”


Tara chuckled. “Th-thank you. That’s really sweet. Um… How about you just make us some eggs?”


Willow smiled. “Okay. I’m the egg master,” she suddenly remembered something from last night. “Oh! Do not ask how I got here, my brain works in mysterious ways, something like eggs leading to ‘frying pan’ leading to ‘can we cook with your juices’ blah blah. But you’ve seen Xena, right? You replied to me as I was falling asleep.”


“Yes!” Tara exclaimed, smiling ear to ear. “I l-love Xena. The… um… first album I ever b-bought on CD was the soundtrack to the musical. The f-first one. Not the jukebox.”


“That’s so cool!” Willow said. “About the eggs. Is scrambled okay? If you don’t like scrambled I can make you sunny-side-up. I just haven’t had scrambled eggs in forever so I want scrambled eggs.”


“S-scramble me up,” Tara smiled.


“Yes, ma’am!”


Willow liked it here.


Did she like it a little too much?

_________________

Oh bless Willows heart. Horribly relatable as someone with anxiety myself. love the closeness already, really curious to see where it goes.

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- I am a poster girl with no poster, I am 32 flavours and then some -

Oh, Willow! Canon Willow is naturally a little bit manic so actually-bipolar Willow is it cranked up to 11! It must be so hard to recognize racing thoughts when your natural persuasion is toward babble in the first place.

Tara is so kind (of course) I wonder has she looked up the disorder or if she's just trying to learn Willow as Willow. Either way she's doing a phenomenal job of taking care of her new friend. Especially since it seems Willow herself is still learning 'how' to be bipolar, when to take emergency meds, how to handle sudden bursts of anxiety, when and how to induce sleep etc I wonder if Tara could help her with some kind of meditation or something?

All so interesting and so much to explore! Keep up the great work

_________________
Amber Benson killed me once.

Check out my finished fics

Love, The Series … Two For Joy/21+/Joy To The World … Dancing With Dimensions

Inevitable/Infinitely …Confidential Eternal … A Twisted Date … Dachsund Through The Snow

High school isn't that long in the past for Willow so I wonder why the friendships she had then are obviously over now. Did her friends abandon her after she came out? If so I really hope that it weren't Xander and Buffy. I'd prefer those two to still become friends with Willow (maybe they could be already friends with Tara and accept her shy new friend into their circle)


Poor Willow! My heart aches for her! I wanted to hug her and tell her everything will be okay. I guess that Tara wanted that too but gave only those small gesture of physical comfort out of fear that she would further overwhelm or even scare Willow otherwise.


That part of reassuring Tara (and probably herself too) that she's not in danger at her parents home makes me wonder if Willow got physically abused by her parents as a teenager (probably not in her earlier childhood or otherwise she wouldn't have said "They loved me growing up.")


I hate how Willow talks herself down and even insults herself! But it's a good sign that in her thoughts she dares to hope that Tara really likes her and is her friend. Scary that she somehow forgot how to "operate" her body in the basic, automatic functions.


Obvioulsy Tara is already protective of Willow, too. I wonder if she also has other feelings for her?
I love that Tara calls Willow "sweetie" and "cutie". I assume that neither her parents nor her former friends have used such terms of endearment when talking to Willow as far as she can remember.



I'm wondering if Tara told a "white lie" here. I can imagine that she woke up from Willow screaming and wanted to check on her as soon as possible without making Willow feel bad about the fact that she woke her.


I hope she'll like it even more soon when she get's to move in...

One thing that puzzles me is that Willow doesn't seem to worry about how per parents will react to her staying away all night. I can't imagine that libraries are open over night in the US so they couldn't think that Willow just fell asleep there.

I'm looking forward to the next chapter with Willow meeting Luna (formerly known as Donny?) and her girlfriend.