Calling all Kittens! Need help with sexual identity survey!

[Yelowsub]

Age: 18



1. Do you consider yourself to be lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, etc.? I think of myself as bisexual, but I have also questioned if I can call myself pansexual. I am currently in a great relationship so I honestly do not feel comfortable questioning if I am attracted to certain people because I am so in love right now. (does that make full sense)



2. Do you remember your first crush as a child? If so, was it with someone of the same or opposite sex? Yes I do. The opposite sex



3. When do you first remember being attracted to someone of the same sex? I knew that I was attracted to women but it took me years to realize that not all people were. I was 15 when I first found out that I was bisexual, that there was a title that made me different than other people. My first full bown crush to someone of the same sex was as a sophmore in high school.



4. After realizing you were attracted to the same sex, did you

a. date people of the same sex

b. date people of the opposite sex

c. not date at all

d. date both



I have dated both, but I would not call my relationship with a person of the same sex "dating" we were both very casual. I have not been in a sersious relationship with a person of the same sex.



5. If your answer to question #4 is "a," approximately how long did it take you to date people of the same sex? My relationship with that person was 3 years after I realized that I was bisexual



6. If your answer to question #4 is "c," are you more comfortable with men, women, or both?



I honestly don't know how to answer this question. But I do feel comfortable with both sexes



7. How comfortable are you with being gay or bisexual?

a. very comfortable

b. somewhat comfortable

c. not comfortable

d. still trying to figure things out

e. it isn't even a question for me



I am extremely comfortable with it. Even as a very religious christian I am very comfortable with who I am.



8.How long did it take you to accept your sexuality? What helped you come to terms with your homesexuality or bisexuality? Was it a matter of time, another person, your family, etc.?



Shall I be blunt? My family got a computer and I finally had internet connection. Okay this is embaressing to admit, but when you're a teenager you get cursious and look at porn. I soon realized that I was only comfortable looking a soft porn of women. Then I realized that from hearing people talk in school this wasn't exactly normal...okay can I stop blushing now?



9. Have you come out to friends and family? If yes, how long did it take for you to come out? If no, do you see yourself coming out to them some time in the future?



I came out to some friends my junior year in high school who I knew were bisexual or transgendered. At the end of my senior year I came out to my friends (the prevsious group had graduated shortly after me telling them) only to find out that my best friends were bi too. we had no idea that all of us weren't straight. Oh it was hilarsious. I came out to my father this summer. I defineiltly see myself coming out to the rest of my family and adventiually my boyfriend.



10. When asked whether or not you are gay or bisexual, are you:

a. quick to answer "yes, I'm gay/bisexual"

b. hesitant to answer "yes. I'm gay/bisexual"

c. quick to answer "yes, I'm straight"

d. hestitant to answer "yes, I'm straight"

e. will not answer the question because you don't believe in labels

f. just laugh off the question and move on to the next topic

g. will not answer this question no matter who asks

h. other



I used to not answer this question as a sort of protest against the lutheran church currently not ordaining sexualy active GLBT pastors. But as my work in the church progressed I told people that I was bi. There is actually a great story about how I came out as being bi at a national youth gathering of youth church leaders but it's a little long.



The following questions are about sex so if you don't want to answer these, that's ok......If you have not had sex, skip to question #15



11. The first time you had sex was it:

a. with someone of the same sex

b. with someone of the opposite sex

c. with two people, one male and one female



umm...errr....c but I really only had sex with the person of the opposite sex



12. Approximately how long did it take you to come to terms with your sexuality and then have sex with someone of the same sex?



I have not have sex with someone of the same sex, but I (to put it slightly crudly) folled around with a person of the same sex 3 years after coming to terms with my sexuality



13. Did you feel that it took more or less time to have sex for the first time because you were gay/bisexual? (I hated how he worded this question......)



If I was not bisexual then I would not have gotten involved in that relationship, so for me personally it took less time



14. Did having sex with someone of the same sex for the first time:

a. reinforce your sexual identity

b. make you question your indentity

c. other (if your answer is "c" briefly explain)

The following two questions are for those that have not had sex at all or have not had sex with someone of the same gender......



Definitly A



15. If you have not had sex, are you comfortable enough with your sexuality to say that your first time will be with someone of the same sex? N/A



16. If you are bisexual and have not had sex with someone of the same sex, are you:

a. still trying to figure out if you want to have sex with someone of the same sex

b. still trying to find the right person

c. just not interested in having sex with anyone right now

d. just not interested in having sex with someone of the same sex right now

e. in a relationship with some of the opposite sex

f. just isn't an option for me



E and C. okay so maybe truthfully C is not a truthful answer, but I am not currently sexualy active and I am very happy

Edited by: Yelowsub at: 12/4/03 9:09 pm

[Tawilove]

1. Do you consider yourself to be lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, etc.?

I don't really like labels but as it go i'm definitly attracted to women



2. Do you remember your first crush as a child? If so, was it with someone of the same or opposite sex?

It was with someone of the opposite sex, i was about 8, he was the trouble maker of the class



3. When do you first remember being attracted to someone of the same sex?

I was about 10 and I didn't realize what it meant so i was very confused and so i pushed it down, then i had a crush over my best friend if i should describe him I would say he is a mix between Xander (physical aspect) and Oz (Quiet type and a guitar God)!!



4. After realizing you were attracted to the same sex, did you

c. not date at all





6. If your answer to question #4 is "c," are you more comfortable with men, women, or both?

It's tricky one cause see, i'm attracted to women but i don't feel so confortable around them, 80% of my friends are males! I think i always found women very intimidating



7. How comfortable are you with being gay or bisexual?

b. somewhat comfortable





8.How long did it take you to accept your sexuality? What helped you come to terms with your homesexuality or bisexuality? Was it a matter of time, another person, your family, etc.?

Took me a huge while!!!!!! I knew it for long but had a very hard time accepting it. I finally came to term with my sexuality around 3 years ago, when i fell in love with a friend of mine (unfortunatly she didn't feel the same, but after a hard period, we're now very good friends)! And i must say that WT relationship and this wonderful board helped me a big deal, openning for me the doors to a world i never thought was there, i'm not alone anymore so thank you dear Kittens



9. Have you come out to friends and family? If yes, how long did it take for you to come out? If no, do you see yourself coming out to them some time in the future?

I came out to many friends of mine about the same time as i accepted my sexuality (see above)! More recently like a bit less than a year i came out to my best and oldest 'girl – friend', i was so terrified cause she means a lot to me, she's like a sister, but i shouldn't have feared telling her, cause she was great and so understanding!! She's always here to listen about my crushes and heartaches, she's wonderful!!

I didn't come out to my parents yet! However i'm sure they must suspect it, i'll tell them probably when i'll be in love and happy!



10. When asked whether or not you are gay or bisexual, are you:

e. will not answer the question because you don't believe in labels



15. If you have not had sex, are you comfortable enough with your sexuality to say that your first time will be with someone of the same sex?

Yes

You can destroy whatever you want / All she needs is to open her arms / To rebuild everything, to rebuild everything

[GiftofAmber]

Age: 26



1. Do you consider yourself to be lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, etc.?

90% Lesbian. 10% Bi-sexual.

2. Do you remember your first crush as a child? If so, was it with someone of the same or opposite sex?

My first crush was definitely on a girl.

3. When do you first remember being attracted to someone of the same sex?

I was in 5th grade, so about 10 years old. There was a girl who had just moved to our school, and I couldn't get up the nerve to talk to her.

4. After realizing you were attracted to the same sex, did you

This is a weird question. When I realized I was attracted to girls, I didn't date at all. I avoided the issue. When I was 19, I had a crush on a boy. Then I dated boys. The boys basically threw in my face that I was more interested in girls, so I guess now, I date both.

5. If your answer to question #4 is "a," approximately how long did it take you to date people of the same sex?

10 years. I was 20.

6. If your answer to question #4 is "c," are you more comfortable with men, women, or both?

I'm more comfortable with men, but more excited by women.

7. How comfortable are you with being gay or bisexual?

Not comfortable. Not at all.

8.How long did it take you to accept your sexuality? What helped you come to terms with your homesexuality or bisexuality? Was it a matter of time, another person, your family, etc.?

Accepting, or resigning? Let's see, when I was 20, I loved this one boy--that 10%, you know. He said, "no, you don't. you're a lesbian."...all because I'd dated one girl. I don't think I'll ever accept it.

9. Have you come out to friends and family? If yes, how long did it take for you to come out? If no, do you see yourself coming out to them some time in the future?

Friends yes, family no--except one cousin. No, because that would require accepting it myself.

10. When asked whether or not you are gay or bisexual, are you:

most of the time, I avoid the question. It's usually years of knowing someone before I admit to it.



The following questions are about sex so if you don't want to answer these, that's ok......If you have not had sex, skip to question #15



11. The first time you had sex was it:

b. with someone of the opposite sex



12. Approximately how long did it take you to come to terms with your sexuality and then have sex with someone of the same sex?

Make out with a girl? When I was 20. Actually have sex? This year. 26.

13. Did you feel that it took more or less time to have sex for the first time because you were gay/bisexual? (I hated how he worded this question......)

I had sex much later than my friends because I couldn't find a guy I was interested in, and no one I knew admitted to liking girls.

14. Did having sex with someone of the same sex for the first time:

a. reinforce your sexual identity

b. make you question your indentity

c. other (if your answer is "c" briefly explain)

Reinforced it; I had a hunch, but I wasn't wholly positive until I kissed a girl.

The following two questions are for those that have not had sex at all or have not had sex with someone of the same gender......

[numbered words]

This is going to be boring considering I'm a virgin. But what the hell. I have nothing else to do.



Age: 15



1. Do you consider yourself to be lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, etc.?



Bisexual



2. Do you remember your first crush as a child? If so, was it with someone of the same or opposite sex?



My first crush was on a little boy in my kindergarten class.



3. When do you first remember being attracted to someone of the same sex?



I think I had being slightly attracted to some of my friends when I was younger. I always got chased around the playground by this one little girl and kind of hoping that she would catch me. She was really huggy and I don't think I really minded a lot.



4. After realizing you were attracted to the same sex, did you

a. date people of the same sex

b. date people of the opposite sex

c. not date at all

d. date both



5. If your answer to question #4 is "a," approximately how long did it take you to date people of the same sex?



6. If your answer to question #4 is "c," are you more comfortable with men, women, or both?



I'm more comfortable around women.



7. How comfortable are you with being gay or bisexual?

a. very comfortable

b. somewhat comfortable

c. not comfortable

d. still trying to figure things out

e. it isn't even a question for me



8.How long did it take you to accept your sexuality? What helped you come to terms with your homesexuality or bisexuality? Was it a matter of time, another person, your family, etc.?



Talking and meeting new friends online who were homosexual helped me a lot. It just really helps being able to talk to people who understand



9. Have you come out to friends and family? If yes, how long did it take for you to come out? If no, do you see yourself coming out to them some time in the future?



I came out to a couple friends (they probably don't remember), and I came out to my sister



10. When asked whether or not you are gay or bisexual, are you:

a. quick to answer "yes, I'm gay/bisexual"

b. hesitant to answer "yes. I'm gay/bisexual"

c. quick to answer "yes, I'm straight"

d. hestitant to answer "yes, I'm straight"

e. will not answer the question because you don't believe in labels

f. just laugh off the question and move on to the next topic

g. will not answer this question no matter who asks

h. other



The following questions are about sex so if you don't want to answer these, that's ok......If you have not had sex, skip to question #15



11. The first time you had sex was it:

a. with someone of the same sex

b. with someone of the opposite sex

c. with two people, one male and one female



12. Approximately how long did it take you to come to terms with your sexuality and then have sex with someone of the same sex?



13. Did you feel that it took more or less time to have sex for the first time because you were gay/bisexual? (I hated how he worded this question......)



14. Did having sex with someone of the same sex for the first time:

a. reinforce your sexual identity

b. make you question your indentity

c. other (if your answer is "c" briefly explain)



The following two questions are for those that have not had sex at all or have not had sex with someone of the same gender......



15. If you have not had sex, are you comfortable enough with your sexuality to say that your first time will be with someone of the same sex?



I think that my first time will be with someone of the same sex. There's no telling though



16. If you are bisexual and have not had sex with someone of the same sex, are you:

a. still trying to figure out if you want to have sex with someone of the same sex

b. still trying to find the right person

c. just not interested in having sex with anyone right now

d. just not interested in having sex with someone of the same sex right now

e. in a relationship with some of the opposite sex

f. just isn't an option for me



Okay...and I'm finished! Hoorah!



-Kris

Edited by: numbered words at: 12/5/03 12:52 pm

[LiquiDreams618]

Thank everyone how has filled out the survey so far! I have received 39 responses. That is so awesome! The response has been unbelieveable. Based on the responses to the questions, I have adjusted the wording and added/subtracted some questions.



You guys rock!



MJ

Edited by: LiquiDreams618 at: 12/5/03 5:13 pm

[Amymlc]

Age:21



1. Do you consider yourself to be lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, etc.?

Bisexual, but I don't really believe in labeling people.



2. Do you remember your first crush as a child? If so, was it with someone of the same or opposite sex?

I think I had crushes on both boys and girls, but I was always told that people shouldn't like people of the same gender that way, so I never thought of my same sex infatuations as crushes.



3. When do you first remember being attracted to someone of the same sex?

I never thought of my feelings as attractions, but I've always thought women were very beautiful. I've known my girlfriend since I was a very young child, but the summer met again after four years, I found it hard to stop staring at her because I thought she was so beautiful. I was so....clueless (for lack of a better word) and didn't realize that I was attracted to her, or women in general, so I pushed that feeling away. I wasn't until my best friend told me she loved me more than a friend and I found myself wanting to kiss her that I actually started to think about my homosexual feelings.



4. After realizing you were attracted to the same sex, did you

a. date people of the same sex

b. date people of the opposite sex

c. not date at all

d. date both

Hmmm...I dated my girlfriend, so I guess that would be A.



5. If your answer to question #4 is "a," approximately how long did it take you to date people of the same sex?

It took me a little while to come to terms about it. I thought that I was pretty open minded, but I guess I was a little homophobic because I freaked out for a while. It took me probably two months to get over it.



6. If your answer to question #4 is "c," are you more comfortable with men, women, or both?

I know I didn't answer C, but I don't think I am more comfortable with one gender over the other. It's not the gender that matters to me, its the person I am with. There things that come with dating men that I sometimes miss, but I'd miss a lot more if I weren't dating my gf.



7. How comfortable are you with being gay or bisexual?

a. very comfortable

b. somewhat comfortable

c. not comfortable

d. still trying to figure things out

e. it isn't even a question for me



I am comfortable but I prefer not to be labeled.



8.How long did it take you to accept your sexuality? What helped you come to terms with your homesexuality or bisexuality? Was it a matter of time, another person, your family, etc.?

I knew that if I didn't deal with it, I'd lose my best friend, whom I was in love with, forever. So I got over my homophobia and just learned to accept that I was attracted to people of both genders.



9. Have you come out to friends and family? If yes, how long did it take for you to come out? If no, do you see yourself coming out to them some time in the future?

I have come out to some people and so has my girlfriend. My girlfriend's family has basically cut her off from their lives. My brother created profiles for me on dating sites hoping I'd find a guy and get over my homosexual feelings. I lost quite a few friends over it. I am sad about that, but I feel that if they are that quick shun me, they weren't really my friends to begin with. My little sister thinks it's cool and says she thinks she is bisexual too. I'll soon have to be "out" because I plan on marrying my gf as soon as it is legal in the US, or until we move to Canada, whichever comes first.



10. When asked whether or not you are gay or bisexual, are you:

a. quick to answer "yes, I'm gay/bisexual"

b. hesitant to answer "yes. I'm gay/bisexual"

c. quick to answer "yes, I'm straight"

d. hestitant to answer "yes, I'm straight"

e. will not answer the question because you don't believe in labels

f. just laugh off the question and move on to the next topic

g. will not answer this question no matter who asks

h. other



It depends on who asks me, but usually I'll say that "I am bisexual if you must put a label on me."



The following questions are about sex so if you don't want to answer these, that's ok......If you have not had sex, skip to question #15



11. The first time you had sex was it:

a. with someone of the same sex

b. with someone of the opposite sex

c. with two people, one male and one female



12. Approximately how long did it take you to come to terms with your sexuality and then have sex with someone of the same sex?

It took me a while, but the day I accepted that I loved my girlfriend more than as my best friend I wasn't afraid of having sex with her, and I did.



13. Did you feel that it took more or less time to have sex for the first time because you were gay/bisexual?

Do you mean the amount of time it took the first time I was having sex, or do you mean how long I waited until I had sex? I don't think it made a difference in how long I waited to have sex, but having sex with a girl usually lasts longer.



14. Did having sex with someone of the same sex for the first time:

a. reinforce your sexual identity

b. make you question your indentity

c. other (if your answer is "c" briefly explain)



The following two questions are for those that have not had sex at all or have not had sex with someone of the same gender......



15. If you have not had sex, are you comfortable enough with your sexuality to say that your first time will be with someone of the same sex?



16. If you are bisexual and have not had sex with someone of the same sex, are you:

a. still trying to figure out if you want to have sex with someone of the same sex

b. still trying to find the right person

c. just not interested in having sex with anyone right now

d. just not interested in having sex with someone of the same sex right now

e. in a relationship with some of the opposite sex

f. just isn't an option for me

Edited by: Warduke at: 12/6/03 1:06 pm

[dizzysyd]

I hope this is still going on. I haven't been to the board in awhile, but yay, I'm back now.



Aaaand here we go.



Age: 27



1. Do you consider yourself to be lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, etc.?



Bisexual, heavily leaning towards lesbian.



2. Do you remember your first crush as a child? If so, was it with someone of the same or opposite sex?



I remember having various crushes on boys in my classes. At the same time, I would get extremely attached to my friends that were girls. I had no idea those were also crushes.



3. When do you first remember being attracted to someone of the same sex?



7th grade. I guess I was 12? I was just fascinated with this girl that I knew. And later that year, in gym class, I had this strange "flash" of one of the girls in class lying on me and kissing me. Weird, because I had no interest in the girl at all. I also knew nothing of sex, so I didn't know WHAT was going on.



4. After realizing you were attracted to the same sex, did you



c. not date at all



5. If your answer to question #4 is "a," approximately how long did it take you to date people of the same sex?



6. If your answer to question #4 is "c," are you more comfortable with men, women, or both?



I've always felt kind of awkward with guys. The only guys I'm comfortable with are gay. I'm very comfortable with girls.



7. How comfortable are you with being gay or bisexual?



b. somewhat comfortable

d. still trying to figure things out



I guess it's D bordering on B for me.



8.How long did it take you to accept your sexuality? What helped you come to terms with your homesexuality or bisexuality? Was it a matter of time, another person, your family, etc.?



Sometimes I'm still not comfortable with it. Up until recently, I considered myself to be equally attracted to men and women. But recently, I realized that wasn't true. I am attracted to women much easier than I am to men. Having good friends helps, but it's still hard for me to admit to some people.



9. Have you come out to friends and family? If yes, how long did it take for you to come out? If no, do you see yourself coming out to them some time in the future?



It was easier for me to start the coming out process when I made friends in my town. They're gay and happy with it. Recently, I've met a nice group of lesbians in town and I'm starting to be accepted there, so it's getting easier. My family still doesn't know. I don't know if I can tell them. They're nice people, but very old-fashioned. They wouldn't take it well.



10. When asked whether or not you are gay or bisexual, are you:



b. hesitant to answer "yes. I'm gay/bisexual"



The following questions are about sex so if you don't want to answer these, that's ok......If you have not had sex, skip to question #15



11. The first time you had sex was it:



b. with someone of the opposite sex



12. Approximately how long did it take you to come to terms with your sexuality and then have sex with someone of the same sex?



Maybe a year?



13. Did you feel that it took more or less time to have sex for the first time because you were gay/bisexual? (I hated how he worded this question......)



The first time I had sex, I had deeply suppressed my sexuality. Although, for the longest time, I thought guys didn't want to date me because they "knew."



14. Did having sex with someone of the same sex for the first time:



a. reinforce your sexual identity





And we're out.

-Syd

---

"There's just too much that time cannot erase" - Evanescence

[tothemax1]

age 40



1. Do you consider yourself to be lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, etc.?

lesbian now



2. Do you remember your first crush as a child? If so, was it with someone of the same or opposite sex?

opposite thou i was attracted to a female p.e teacher





3. When do you first remember being attracted to someone of the same sex?

cant really remember in my teens



4. After realizing you were attracted to the same sex, did you

a. date people of the same sex

b. date people of the opposite sex

c. not date at all

d. date both

b opposite



5. If your answer to question #4 is "a," approximately how long did it take you to date people of the same sex?



6. If your answer to question #4 is "c," are you more comfortable with men, women, or both?





7. How comfortable are you with being gay or bisexual?

a. very comfortable

b. somewhat comfortable

c. not comfortable

d. still trying to figure things out

e. it isn't even a question for me

would say b



8.How long did it take you to accept your sexuality? What helped you come to terms with your homesexuality or bisexuality? Was it a matter of time, another person, your family, etc.?

actually took me about 32 years before i fell in love with a woman and realizes how right it felt for me



9. Have you come out to friends and family? If yes, how long did it take for you to come out? If no, do you see yourself coming out to them some time in the future?

no not said anything apart from a few friends who know,as to telling my family when i meet the one then yes i would tell them



10. When asked whether or not you are gay or bisexual, are you:

a. quick to answer "yes, I'm gay/bisexual"

b. hesitant to answer "yes. I'm gay/bisexual"

c. quick to answer "yes, I'm straight"

d. hestitant to answer "yes, I'm straight"

e. will not answer the question because you don't believe in labels

f. just laugh off the question and move on to the next topic

g. will not answer this question no matter who asks

h. other

prob f



The following questions are about sex so if you don't want to answer these, that's ok......If you have not had sex, skip to question #15



11. The first time you had sex was it:

a. with someone of the same sex

b. with someone of the opposite sex

c. with two people, one male and one female

b



12. Approximately how long did it take you to come to terms with your sexuality and then have sex with someone of the same sex?

after they made the first move,think it was a few weeks



13. Did you feel that it took more or less time to have sex for the first time because you were gay/bisexual? (I hated how he worded this question......)

dont know



14. Did having sex with someone of the same sex for the first time:

a. reinforce your sexual identity

b. make you question your indentity

c. other (if your answer is "c" briefly explain)

b



The following two questions are for those that have not had sex at all or have not had sex with someone of the same gender......



15. If you have not had sex, are you comfortable enough with your sexuality to say that your first time will be with someone of the same sex?



16. If you are bisexual and have not had sex with someone of the same sex, are you:

a. still trying to figure out if you want to have sex with someone of the same sex

b. still trying to find the right person

c. just not interested in having sex with anyone right now

d. just not interested in having sex with someone of the same sex right now

e. in a relationship with some of the opposite sex

f. just isn't an option for me

[CEsgirl13]

Age:14



1. Do you consider yourself to be lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, etc.?Lesbain all the way



2. Do you remember your first crush as a child? If so, was it with someone of the same or opposite sex?it was of the opposite i had lots of crushes



3. When do you first remember being attracted to someone of the same sex?

about 2 years ago

4. After realizing you were attracted to the same sex, did you

a. date people of the same sex

b. date people of the opposite sex

c. not date at all

d. date both

well since i didnt come to terms that i was a lesbian for a little bit i dated guys





5. If your answer to question #4 is "a," approximately how long did it take you to date people of the same sex?



6. If your answer to question #4 is "c," are you more comfortable with men, women, or both?



7. How comfortable are you with being gay or bisexual?

a. very comfortable

b. somewhat comfortable

c. not comfortable

d. still trying to figure things out

e. it isn't even a question for me

a. very comfortable- i dont care how people think of me



8.How long did it take you to accept your sexuality? What helped you come to terms with your homesexuality or bisexuality? Was it a matter of time, another person, your family, etc.?

it took me about 3 or 4 months to ccept i was bi, then i noticed i wasn't even attracted to men.



9. Have you come out to friends and family? If yes, how long did it take for you to come out? If no, do you see yourself coming out to them some time in the future?

everyone at school and all my friends know only about 4 people in my family know, i try to hide it from them cuz they're complete homophobes



10. When asked whether or not you are gay or bisexual, are you:

a. quick to answer "yes, I'm gay/bisexual"

b. hesitant to answer "yes. I'm gay/bisexual"

c. quick to answer "yes, I'm straight"

d. hestitant to answer "yes, I'm straight"

e. will not answer the question because you don't believe in labels

f. just laugh off the question and move on to the next topic

g. will not answer this question no matter who asks

h. other

a quick answer "yes I'm gay"







15. If you have not had sex, are you comfortable enough with your sexuality to say that your first time will be with someone of the same sex?

i doubt it will be with a man very highly in fact.



hope this helps everyone sorry i had to repost this it didnt come up correctly the first time

[neroden1]

Age: 27. Male, FYI!



1. Do you consider yourself to be lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, etc.?

Bi. (Kinsey 1 or 2 though, not 3).



2. Do you remember your first crush as a child? If so, was it with someone of the same or opposite sex?

Opposite.



3. When do you first remember being attracted to someone of the same sex?

High school.



4. After realizing you were attracted to the same sex, did you

(c. not date at all)

Which is what I was doing before.



6. If your answer to question #4 is "c," are you more comfortable with men, women, or both?

Women, I suppose -- the majority of my close platonic friends are women, and this has always been the case. But I reject the premise of the question because I am just as comfortable with my (fewer) male friends as I am with my female friends. As for dating, I dated very, very cautiously (most would say too cautiously).



7. How comfortable are you with being gay or bisexual?

(b. somewhat comfortable)



But more comfortable than I was with the idea of being "straight", which disturbed me. Sexuality as a whole disturbed me for a long time, although I'm comfortable with it now.



8.How long did it take you to accept your sexuality? What helped you come to terms with your homesexuality or bisexuality? Was it a matter of time, another person, your family, etc.?



I was brought up in a deeply anti-sexist environment. Restrictions on who I was supposed to fall for seemed simply sexist to me; so unlike some people, I never assumed I was straight. So I transitioned from considering myself asexual to considering myself bisexual. That took years.



9. Have you come out to friends and family? If yes, how long did it take for you to come out? If no, do you see yourself coming out to them some time in the future?



To friends yes, to family not really, but I think they know. Anyway, I never told them I was straight either. ;-)



10. When asked whether or not you are gay or bisexual, are you:

(a. quick to answer "yes, I'm gay/bisexual")



Very few people ask outright though.



The following questions are about sex so if you don't want to answer these, that's ok......If you have not had sex, skip to question #15



11. The first time you had sex was it:

(b. with someone of the opposite sex)

The *only* time, and it's the *only* person I've had sex with, and I'm still with her.



I think there are more offensive assumptions in this survey than you already identified....



12. Approximately how long did it take you to come to terms with your sexuality and then have sex with someone of the same sex?



Um, irrelevant. :-)



13. Did you feel that it took more or less time to have sex for the first time because you were gay/bisexual? (I hated how he worded this question......)



No. I was going to take a long time before I had sex no matter what.



14. Did having sex with someone of the same sex for the first time:

(c. other)

Not applicable.



The following two questions are for those that have not had sex at all or have not had sex with someone of the same gender......



15. If you have not had sex, are you comfortable enough with your sexuality to say that your first time will be with someone of the same sex?



Um, this is a bizarrely loaded question for bisexuals.



16. If you are bisexual and have not had sex with someone of the same sex, are you:

(e. in a relationship with some of the opposite sex)



OK, so I think this survey is really poorly constructed.



The first point I'd complain about is that some of the questions really don't apply to bisexuality reasonably, particularly the variety of bisexuality which "loves a person, not a gender", like mine. The second major point I'd complain about is the implied linkage between having sex at a younger age and accepting sexual orientation. It's quite possible to come to terms with one's sexual orientation (freeing and accepting one's imagination) before coming to terms with the idea of actually, y'know, *doing* something with someone.