The Questions and (un)-Answers game

[Auburn]

A: What have a cake if you can't eat it? What have a light if you can't shine it? And what have Brake if you can't use it? Because life likes you to have things and she also likes you to stand at scratch your head while you figure out how to use it. It's a guilty pleasure for life, like a sugar addict's tub of ice cream.

Q: Why are bags called bags?

[umgaynow]

A: Because if they were called nipples nobody would want to give them back for re-cyclage

Q: Why is red, white and blue such a popular color combination for flags?

[DelWhicker]

A: When combined those colors create the most marvelous shade of lavendar, which, as everyone knows, is the perfect color to promote peace, harmony and tolerance. Those same colors, represented separately, achieve the exact opposite and that's just the way the Republicans like it...uh-huh uh-huh.

Q: Why is it that your least favorite song is the one that gets stuck in your head all day?

[dynigirl]

A Thats how Simon Cowell makes his money.

Q Can trolley rage be called trolley rage if your only using a basket?

[Auburn]

A: Well I'm not sure if you have ever heard of the term 'basket case'. It came about because a woman with serious PMT attacked a man waiting in line at the till behind her, because he was chewing on his gum too loudly. Her weapon of choice was a basket. The man then took the woman to court, suing her for battery with a basket. The papers were, of course, documenting the case due to the interest of the public and they aptly named it, 'Basket Case'. So, to answer your question, no, it cannot be called trolly rage.

Q: Why are parents choosing silly names for their children?

[Darth Pacula]

A: Well, the World Health Organization and the UN are trying to keep it secret, but there's a worldwide epidemic sweeping the globe at a .... well, a worldwide level. I'm afraid it's an epidemic of ... inane stupidity.

Just think about it: they're everywhere you look! There are stupid people living near you, there are stupid people where you work. There may even be stupid people in your very own family!

And, as everyone not afflicted by this insidious desease knows, stupid people can't pick a name worth a damn.

Q: Where. oh where has my brain gone? It doesn't seem to be inside my head.

[DelWhicker]

A: Paul, you should check the fridge. Bottom shelf...all the way in the back behind the beer. There should be a large jar with a label that says Abby Normal. Look familiar? If not, my guess would be it's on holiday and it never left you a note.

Q: Why don't sheep shrink when they get left out in the rain?

[Auburn]

A: because they wash in a special formula of washing powder that stops their woolly fur from shrinking. This means that they can roam around a field quite happily while making the sound 'baaaaa'.

Q: Is the moon made of cheese?

[db]

A: No silly. The moon is not made of cheese. That is a myth. It is made of tofu.


Q: How much wood CAN a woodchuck chuck?

[DelWhicker]

A: If he spends a lot of time at the gym, at least a cord and a half. If he's one of those woodchucks that spends all day in his burrow, eating bon-bons and watching Oprah reruns, then none at all.

Q: Would it still be called an orange if it was blue?

[Thianne]

A: it would probably be called smurf-orange

Q: where does cheese grow?

[Auburn]

A: The man in the moon grows cheese in his back garden on the moon's surface and when its ripe he sends a shooting star as a signal for Americans in funny shaped machines to get it and bring it back to earth.

Q: Does an elephant really never forget?

[DelWhicker]

A: 4 out of 5 elephants actually remember being asked this question, but could not recall what they gave as answers.

Q: Who is this Pete guy, and why do we swear for his sake?

[Thianne]

A: oh, he's my cousin. and i asked him, he doesn't know

Q: *holds knife at throat* what did you do with my DICTIONARY!!?!?!?!

[cantbefredless]

A: I ate it!!!

Q: why is santa claus gay?

[Thianne]

A: 'cause CBFL is a bit crazy!

Q: why on erth did you ate it? it was my best friend!

[cantbefredless]

A: i really dont know!! i'll buy you a knew one

Q: how come everybody calls me crazy?

[Thianne]

A: 'cause when it senses you, the smurf in my pocket starts screaming

Q: why does my back hurt?

[Auburn]

A: Because you were sleep walking last night and ended up in the gym, but instead of picking up weights you picked up a 250 pound body builder. He didn't seem to mind.

Q: Why do driving licence pictures or passport pictures always turn out to be embarrassing?

[oneyedchicklet]

A: So in the event you commit a serious crime, they can be used as mug shots and on wanted posters.

Q: Why do my eyes keep going blurry today?

HUGS
Barb

[DelWhicker]

A: Because I'm remotely controlling them all the way from the left coast. Let's see what happens when I push this button...

Q: What exactly did happened when I pushed that button?

[Auburn]

A: The world went back in time by ten minutes.

Q: Where do remotes hide when you can't find them?

[Candleshoe]

A: In the tumble-drier with the missing socks.

Q: Should I put my cardigan on?

[Auburn]

A: No you should put on a cubicle.

Q: Why does water taste awful at room temperature?

[oneyedchicklet]

A: Because when you leave it out of the refrigerator, the trolls come in the middle of the night and spit in it.

Q: Why is perfume sometimes called "Toilet Water"? That's just wrong on so many levels.

HUGS
Barb

[Emms]

A: Because other countries are making fun of us.

Q: What's the back-story of the "Morton Salt girl?"

[notl33t]

She was originally a boy.

Why are Soap Operas still on the air?

[SithLordWiccan]

A: Because people need something to do in the morning.

Q: Who gives love a bad name?

[willowbaby05]

A: Gold Diggers.

Q: Why do women have boobies?

[Auburn]

A: So that other women can perv at them, yet appreciate their other purposes.

Q: Why are builders always showing their bums?