The Questions and (un)-Answers game

[Boschi]

A: They're always great fun if you take them on a spin through Dusseldorf and show them the sights, but you asked what to do "to" them I see, not "with" them.



Rather exclusionary of you I think. Some of us have relationships with pumpkins that transcend their objectification as victims of our will and whim.

You apparently haven't really known a pumpkin, and believe me, it's your loss. To know a pumpkin truly is to love it; every noble arch and curve, every warm orange glow. The time and love I've shared with pumpkins has profoundly shaped my life. Pumpkins have shaped all our lives in fact.

I think if you, for a moment, tried stepping out of your non-cucurbit privilege and considered the impact of pumpkins on history you would realize that perhaps a better question is:

Q: "What can pumpkins do to me?"

ETA: missing quote marks

[umgaynow]

A: You could get a couple of the nice round sugar pumpkins and stuff your bra with them if you really wanted to impress a date...just make sure they aren't the ones with a really long curly stem

Q: Anticipating a sore back after a night of candy duty, I cannot help asking...why must children be so short?

[Auriam]

Cause it would really (more than it do already) is the baby born in the form of adult !


Why people drink when they know, in the morning they will be sick?

[Brianna]

cause thy wanna see green elfs

why we can only see green elfs when we are drunk??

[dynigirl]

A. Because usually they are blue and blend in with the sky untill you comsume alcohol

Q. What do you have to do to make the blue elves turn purple?

[Auriam]

oh it's easy, you have to give him some milk, wait a day,
when i become white, you have to take his shoes like that he will be angry and become all red.
Then give him some chocolate
and ta daaaaaaaaaa
he is purple !

Why my pillows always finish on the floor when i'm sleeping ?

[Brianna]

A: cause its a rebel and wanna indepnedence!!!!

Q: Why are some people so umpleasant??

[StaceAngel]

No candy. Or piles... whichever you prefer


Why is there such thing as a leap year?

[umgaynow]

A: I can't give details, but lets just say the frog lobby has a lot of power in Washington and leave it at that...

Q: Why is the logo of the Country Music Awards the same symbol as the insignia on the original Star Trek?

[Candleshoe]

A: Because Dolly Parton's chest is the Final Frontier...

Q: Candy Canes. Who thought those up, then?

[db]

A: Well, duh. Elves! They use them as divening rods to find underground chocolate springs.

Q: Turtle Doves. What's *that* whole thing all about?

[umgaynow]

A: Turtledoves...exactly the sort of thing that proves that mad scientists and bongs hits don't mix

Q: Is there anything in the universe so useless that some fool won't buy it on Ebay?

[Brianna]

A:A part of elvis ones shocks... what can you do whith that???

How could you esplain a dungeons and drangons adicction?

[NewRuthRising]

There's something in the water. the chlorine is for the psychotics, the iodine is for your teeth and there's a kind of secret potion thingy that reacts with a certain genetic quirk that appears in several teenaged boys, forever corrupting their minds.

Why are baby swans called cygnets? Goslings and ducklings at least sound like their parents!

[watty]

A: originally swans were called cygns, but it was too hard to pronounce and the vowel lobby sent several representatives to push for their cause. The vowel lobby was very powerful in those days. After much discussion they were still undecided on a new name, and the head of the Poultry Naming Committee screamed in frustration, "can we stop swanning about and pick a name already?" and there the name was born. A junior intern forgot to update the associated names for the young and so the term cygnets stayed.

Q: what is the best cure for the flu?
[br]

[Auriam]

From my island is Rum with honey



When were the last time you go shopping? And what did you buy ?

[NewRuthRising]

dijon mustard and a llama. i only went out for the mustard but the llama was half price with quite a long expiry date so i thought "why not?" it was only when i got home and the llama shat everywhere that i remembered why impulse buys are a bad idea.

[umgaynow]

pssssst...you forgot to leave a question!

[NewRuthRising]

D'oh!

Okay...um...

Why does the phone always ring just as you get in the shower?

ETA: The phona rang just as I hit the Submit button....freeeeeeeeeaky.

[Brianna]

Cause our phones are alive and the spy us.....

Why when u're waiting for a call everyone (whose call aren't waiting) call you?

[Auriam]

Cause they are clueness and think all the world living for them !

Where is your butt right now ?

[NewRuthRising]

A. Working it's way up my spine to my shoulders. Sitting down has become somewhat difficult.

Q. When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were able, for the time beingexcluding all restraints on her not to go also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?

Disclaimer: I stole that question from a fantastically funny xena fic. It isnt mine and whoever wrote it is far smarter than me.

[Auriam]

Hum let me think mmmm
dunno maybe ?

What would you do for a kiss from Tara ?

[umgaynow]

A: I would gladly endeavor to shellac a tiger...or if being a vegetarian and kitty lover, she objected...then I would decoratively hi-light a large rutabega

B: Why is it that the turkey is the only one who ever manages to get stuffed on Thanksgiving?

[Brianna]

A: turkeys never give thanks.....


Q: What do you think about the clam collection out of season?

[NewRuthRising]

A. Darling, it's so passe! Not even a good pair of Manolos could redeem such a thing. The Clam Collection, and indeed shellfish in general, is OVER. Calamari, Squid and Other Squishy Stuff is the new black, dontcha know?

Q. In the scene in Titanic where Jack and Rose are lying on the rail of the ship as it begins to sink and one of the guys hanging on falls, hits a big thingy with a loud clang and spins into the ocean, did you giggle and say "Wheeeeeeeee!"? You did, didn't you?

[Auriam]

maybe


Why everything always fall ?

[SithLordWiccan]

A: Laws of physics.

Q: I don't have to go to classes today because the college is closed due to bad weather. So why am I going to go anyway?

[Candleshoe]

A: Because that's where your harem of lovely ladies is....

Q: Why does my neck hurt?

[db]

A: Because you were a very naughty. No more lifting tortises with your ears! It is just not seemly, hygenic or ergonomic. I don't *care* what you are trying to gain strength for... you'll damage yourself that way .

Q: ABCD Puppies?