The Crappy Feelings Thread (HOTLINES in first post)

[CrazyTaraWitch]

One of the babies I take care of got hurt today, climbing on a chair we'd been telling him over and over not to climb on. It wasn't nearly as bad as we thought at first, but even so he was very very upset and bled a fair bit when it first happened. By the end of the day he seemed perfectly fine, and his mom wasn't concerned at all, so the real crappy feeling is how my lead teacher acted about it. She was changing a diaper at the time, while the other assistant and I were in the room. I'd been having to take him off the chair and move him away repeatedly for the last five or ten minutes, and finally moved the chair to where I *thought* he couldn't get on it, and went to do something else for a moment. I had my back turned for about 20 seconds before we heard the thud as he fell, and the subsequent scream. I did feel like it was my fault (and I almost always blame myself when the kids get hurt), but after my lead teacher was implying that it was my fault, that she would get in trouble because of the carelessness of myself and the other assistant. It really frustrates me; I don't see how when we have 10 kids I can be expected to watch him every second. I don't feel like I was negligent in my care, but I really don't like her implications that I was.

[Nue]

my left eye hurts like hell ¬¬

[JustSkipIt]

Jas - Fact is there's no way to make absolutely sure little kids won't find a way to injure themselves. They could run into walls or windows if you took all the shelves and chairs out of the room. It sounds like you did a good job and this was just an ACCIDENT. Sorry you're feeling crappy and I'm glad he's ok.

[ScottishAsh]

Though i am feeling giddy right now, there are a few things that are pretty crappy. The main thing with planning a move is stress. I've been so stressed out for weeks, because im not only job and flat hunting but also ive started pre-production of a short film i will be filming later this year and i have been working all the hours i can at the bar to make sure im sorted for this move. So the film script i have been working on for the last 2 years has been put on hold, and i was on roll which sucks, but i will get back to zone when all this is over and done with.

[CrazyTaraWitch]

I know I kinda screwed up, but it really hurts that she doesn't want my comfort.

[ashcrash71590]

i miss my girl and my sister =(

Ash

[Nue]

I have to go back tomorrow...

[CrazyTaraWitch]

Even though there were some really wonderful parts to this weekend, as a whole it was exhausting, and left me feeling like I need a weekend to recover from my weekend. Plus... I really miss my girl, and it's still almost two months until she'll be here :(

[tetyline]

She's not here and this time is diferent, i don't know why i can't stop crying. I miss her so much

[mandyanyone]

OK, so I wake up and I’m late..yay..but not much..then I go to the bank and sit in line for ever, and then end up having to switch to another lane…cause the dude in front of hadn’t moved in like 20 mins…

Then, after that…I drive to work…I’m about…2 blocks from work..and my mom calls…she has a flat tire and I have to come get her…which she’s at the bank…about a block from the bank I was just at….

So I turn around and drive back there…and sit…waiting on her in the bank…for over an hour...

Then she finally comes out and we go to work…and all day now…cause she’s pissed about her car…she’s bitchin at me bout stupid shit…so I’m like..ok, we need to go, so my sister and I leave and go to the gym…

On the way to the gym…I have to stop and get headphones..(cause my cat eats my wires.*glares at cats*)..And so I’m in the store…and they don’t have the ones I want…and the only ones like the ones I want are $30…

So I get those, and then I’m standing in line behind this old lady with pillows in her cart…and her and the cashier lady…get into a discussion about which pillows go best with which of the sofa covers she had..and I stand there…

…15-20 mins…I get a lil upset…and switch lanes…and go behind 4 other people…and still beat the old chick out the damn store!

Then, off to the gym…good…office store…good..back to work…finish things..then we leave to go home…and mom and I stop for dinner…all good…then we meet my sister and her fiance’ at my moms car…so we can fix it…

So…we jack up the car…get the tire off…bout to put the new one on…

BAM CRASH!!

…the car falls off the jack and is on the ground…

So we’re like…what the hell do we do now..so my sister goes about 20 mins to a car repair store, and gets a better jack..(cause the other one BENT!!!)

She gets back, and we get it all fixed…after like hour or so standing outside in the freezing cold…and we all go to home…

Then….

I stop to get my mail…turn my car off…cause I need my keys…and get my mail…get back in my car…and my car won’t start…

Sooo…I call my mom…and I’m like come over here, my car won’t start…of course…she’s in a store…so I sat there….what…30 mins waiting on her…

while waiting I check my mail, and for some reason (which they should not have…) the government is keeping my state tax refund of $168…for reason unknown to me…

Then…my mom gets there, and we push the car out of the spot so that we could get it where we could jump it…and mom’s set of cables don’t work…luckily I had some as well…but yea…now cold and this was just a bad bad day…lol

[Nue]

I couldn´t sleep last night, cause she wasn´t by my side...

[Taralover]

I was woken up far too early today, and some w*****r keeps attacking my computer.

[CrazyTaraWitch]

She's trying to pull me in again. I don't think it's gonna work this time... I just want to be left alone.

[tetyline]

Is so hard, i try to please everybody, try not to make anyone angry but in the end is always my fault. I do all i can, but is never good enough.
I'm sick and tired of trying to make everybody happy, holding what i feel or think inside, but i just can't change. I know that i never gonna get the "thank's" that i deserve or a help in return and what sucks the most is that even thought i am right, i deserve to be angry, i feel too guilty or scare to express my anger. So i just put a smile on and pretend i'm okay whit at all.

[Zooeys_Bridge]

Where are you?

[Nue]

I miss her... I mean, I REALLY miss her... everytime we´re together, it´s amazing, but we have to say goodbye a few days later and this is killing me... I know it´s worthed, she is the best thing that ever happened to me, and I love her...

But kills me to know that I can´t help her when she needs me... kills me to know that I get angry, not with her, cause, you know, she´s incredible (I mean it, she´s adorable, kind, beautiful, all those great qualities that I ever wanted in a girl!) but angry with the whole situation... angry at myself that I can´t help...

[tetyline]

I'm suffering, she's suffering, and we both know how to make the suffering stop, we just need to be with each other, but the world seems to think that isn't such a great idea... but i don't really care about what the world think, to be with her, nothing can get in my way. In the end, we'll get what we deserve, our happily ever after... I believe that and that makes me keep fighting, if i'm don't, who will, right?

[Kessari]

The really great flights I found yesterday got 100 bucks more expensive over night and now I'm scared I will have to pay a lot lot more than I expected...

[CrazyTaraWitch]

I've been putting something off, telling someone what's wrong and why I've been so distant, and I know it's finally time to just suck it up and talk... but I so don't want to. Even after everything...I don't want to hurt her, and I know I will. But I can't keep pretending, and the problem's not going to go away unless I do something about it. I just really really hate confrontation...

[writerfreak]

I am leaving the board, and hope all my friends that would like to keep in contact to know you are more than welcome to do so. But this is it, I am leaving now. Goodbye, I will miss you all.

writerfreak

[umgaynow]

On Friday my dad is having things poked into his heart and here I am 2,200 miles away unable to do anything...not that I could do anything if I was there...only somehow I feel more ineffectual and scared being here

[CrazyTaraWitch]

Though I only take one class a semester and work 38 hours/week, technically my job is "student assistant". I finish my school program in May, which I thought would work out perfectly to let me keep my job through December, because you can stay in a student postion one semester after you're out of school and I *thought* the summer didn't count, cause I was fairly certain there were ex-students at my work that stayed from May-December of this past year... Tonight my stepmom. who works for the same university as I do and knows all the details of student employment, told me summer *does* count as a semester, which means unless I get a different position I'll be out of a job at the end of August.
The job I have now would be pretty much perfect to stay in through the end of the year, because once I'm not enrolled in school they have to give me a raise that would mean I'd get paid better than any other job I could find, and since I wouldn't be permanent I could take time off (admittedly unpaid, but even so... even I needed to go see my girl it wouldn't be a big problem). I really just... wanted to mantain the status quo for the next 11 months, and I really don't want to have to worry about getting a new job :(

[Taralover]

Last night when I was trying to sleep my thighs itched and needed constant scratching, my toes were numb and my chest hurt.

[Kessari]

My supervisor refuses to give me time off so I can go home to my girl. I talked to my current boss and he tried to convince her, but it didn't work. On Wednesday I can try to talk to my supervisors boss, but the chances are teeny tiny, that she will change her mind... I wanna scream and cry and punch things. I can't wait until July. It's just too long... Today just sucks!

[CrazyTaraWitch]

The last few days have just sucked. I've been feeling bad for a couple weeks now, went to the doctor last week and got on antibiotics for a sinus and ear infection, and I felt better for a few days, but then I felt like shit again... Wednesday I was worried I had or was getting a fever and was extremely congested, yesterday was I was out of it, my throat hurt, and I couldn't breathe through my nose, today my throat's even worse, my lymph nodes are swollen, my eyes have been itching all day, my ears hurt worse than ever, and on the way home from work I got a headache. Also this week there were three cases of vomitting in my classroom at work (one of which got on me, two of which I had to clean up the kids after), and lots of bad news/bad feelings. The final end of a friendship came, which was for the best but stressful and unpleasant, I found out my job ends sooner than I thought, and my girlfriend's plans to visit fell through. Today I haven't gotten to talk to my girl at all, I miss her like crazy and it was hard getting through a work day when I felt awful without getting to talk to her like I usually do.
I really just want things to stop sucking...

[ScottishAsh]

Well work. Yes work. It started out pretty good. An hour into my shift, thats right the beginning of the night, i had a customer shouting in my face, one i know and is friends with most of my family. Had a shouting match with, thank goodness for one of the other customers or i would have went for him and then he decided to throw a table at me while i was behind the bar. What a great way to start the night of busy bar night, with a band playing and me throwing up in the toilet, hmmmmmm cant wait to get out of that place.

[CrazyTaraWitch]

I was a complete idiot, again. I really really messed up this time... and of course it had to be today...

Plus, I'm still sick, and I'm worried I won't be allowed to work tomorrow since I now have a rash.

[Taralover]

I am 97% certain that my computer has been hacked and it will cost ££ to have fixed.

[CrazyTaraWitch]

I still feel pretty awful. I fear I should go to the doctor again, but I can't afford to miss any more work...

[Misanthropic_Ninja]

I want it to be over now. Please?