I am late to the party as ever, hope you don’t mind. I have given some thought to your original set of questions and come up with some waffly answers. I apologise in advance for the length of the post and for the inevitable repetition of points already ably made by others.
1.Why do you keep coming back to read or to write W/T fan fiction? You probably have a job/school/family/busy life, and reading and writing fan fiction takes time and effort. Of course, the characters themselves are a huge draw, but what else does fan fiction give you that you can’t get anywhere else? (In general, but also with regard to recent events, of course). I have found that reading fanfiction has become an extension of the subtext hunting I have done for a long time. As a lesbian, I spent my formative years looking in the media for the characters and situations which reflected my own life and feelings, only to find that they didn’t exist. I’m sure I won’t be the only one to fess up that the first fanfiction I read was J/7. That brought me to Lisa of Nine, who also wrote W/T and I suddenly discovered this whole community that was completely in love with Willow and Tara, and not one bit embarrassed to be celebrating it every day.
I’ve always read compulsively, devouring books at an alarming rate. I read quickly, accepting that I will miss the nuances, but knowing that I will almost certainly re-read. I can happily re-read a book with which I am already overly familiar. I think of them as old friends and never consider them disposable. I am the same way with TV shows or films. My partner never re-reads, in fact she won’t even watch a video if she’s seen the film at the cinema. My approach is to think of stories, whether written or dramatised, more like pieces of music – nobody chucks out a CD after they’ve heard it once do they? (Unless it’s total shite!)
So – what does fanfiction give me that I can’t get elsewhere? I think it is about the community that produces it. The writing, more so on the Pens than any other forum I have found, is the product of other people who are like me. Like me because they are lesbians, or because they have watched every episode of BtVS, or because they are fans of Aly and Amber, or because they are in love with Willow and Tara – all or any of the above. There is a common ground that forms the foundation for the community, and one of its products is the fanfic.
When I first came to the Pens I read the “missing scene” stories which were easiest because I knew what to expect. I wasn’t particularly interested in the original stories or AU’s, because I’d never read them before. Then when I ran out of “missing scenes”, I started on the original pieces and before I knew it I was reading everything that was posted and loving it all.
I guess primarily it’s about the varied descriptions of a loving lesbian relationship between two characters I already care about, written by people who care about them as much as I do.
Why do I keep coming back? To read the next instalment of course! The reason I like Pens more than archives is because it is always changing, always growing. It is like being part of an organic, expanding world, full of twists and surprises yet anchored by the certainty we all feel about the essential ‘rightness’ of Willow and Tara.
2. Is there something about reading and writing W/T fan fiction that is essentially different from the other reading and writing that you do? How would you describe that difference, or how would you say what makes fan fiction reading and writing unique?Umm… I think I already answered much of this question in my previous ramble. It is, as I already said, a growing process, and on the Pens I can be part of that if I choose. Certainly many people take a far more active role than I in the feedback and praise which forms part of each thread. I am astounded by some of the philosophical debate, which takes place, and by the depth to which themes are explored by the readers. I imagine it’s a little like belonging to a book club or reading circle; each member reads a book or part of it and then the members meet to talk about the story, but also about their own relationship to the narrative and the effect it may have had upon them.
As for writing, my own experience is very limited. I have posted a couple of short pieces and started others, which may or may not make it to the board. It is the only fiction I have written since school so it differs vastly from my other writing, which is work-based (and very boring). But the reason I have written at all is rooted in a desire to be a part of this community, to contribute to it and attempt to give as much pleasure to others as I have received myself in this forum; (which came out a lot more lesbian than it sounded in my head).
3. Have the recent events on the show changed your feelings about W/T fan fiction specifically? Do you feel more or less compelled by it now than before? Does it do something more or less for you than it did before?If anything, I have become more immersed in the fanfiction, more attached to it and more defensive of it. Unlike many others, I have watched the end of season 6 and believe me; I am more than happy to see all the damage undone by the creative minds of the kittens. I am enjoying the alternative season 7 offerings, and I think that, if anything, there has been an explosion of creativity which could be directly attributed to the way in which season 6 ended on the show.
I was dismayed by initial responses from some who suggested that they would leave Willow and Tara behind in their efforts to heal from the pain of S6. I understand the anger, but I am happy that this has not happened, and that a number of writers have chosen to carry on, keeping Willow and Tara alive and kicking for those of us who
actually care.
4. May I ask you follow-up on questions via e-mail?Feel free!
5. Do you think that at some point your need for W/T fan fiction will go away? If not, why not? Is it really cathartic if you keep coming back to it?Honestly? I have no idea. I am a bit obsessive by nature and at the moment I don’t feel any desire to go away. I have to admit that I pretty much gave up on J/7 fanfiction once I found the Kitten. I think that is because, much as I loved it, it was pure fantasy whereas Willow and Tara was actually happening right there on the TV screen, and nobody was pretending that it was anything other than two girls in love with each other. The other reason for moving over so whole-heartedly to W/T shipping was the opportunity to be part of the Kitten community. I read J/7 in archives, so it was a solitary experience, whereas here I am part of a group, enjoying the experience with others.
Has it been cathartic? Yes I think so. I have been moved to tears more than once reading accounts of Willow’s grief and turmoil, happy reunions and painful realities. I imagine that the writers have used the writing process for this very purpose, and it has affected me deeply. As long as I feel that way, I will keep coming back for more.
6. How important is the response and feedback of readers to the experience of writing OR READING fan fiction?Feedback – am I qualified to answer that one? I have been registered for about 10 months and am still a flaming bloody O. I like to think of myself as selective, or mysterious, but the truth is actually that I am lazy and a bit shy. I read almost all the stories posted on the board, and you will find a post from me in most threads if you look hard enough. Part of the reason I don’t post more is that I feel a little intimidated by the time and effort some people put into their feedback – I often just don’t have the time to read all the feedback, so I feel like I can’t post and interrupt the debate. I also feel like this sometimes when there is a lot of banter between updates – it’s almost like there is an in-crowd in the playground, and I’m not part of it. That makes me sound petty, and is probably rather unfair. It’s just a feeling I have had sometimes and I didn’t know if anyone else felt like that or had managed to say as much.
Having said that, at the risk of being a total hypocrite, I have bantered a little myself on occasion, and thoroughly enjoyed the experience. It’s just a matter of being in the right place at the right time I suppose. Maybe my suggestion above is just a fit of jealousy that others are funnier or wittier than I am? Hmmm… I didn’t plan any self-
analysis in this post.
When I did post my first story, way back when, I was utterly thrilled by the response. Nice people said nice things. It was a real encouragement to me, and made me feel part of the community in a way I hadn’t before. Two people even took the time and effort to e-mail me in addition to posting in the thread. That led me to start writing something else, and the end result was that I have spent the last six months in a very privileged position. I get sneak previews of Katharyn’s Sidestep Chronicle, in order to beta-read it.
Reading the feedback in the thread can be a positive part of the whole experience or package. I am grateful that the Kitten is so well moderated, as it means that I have not had to read the flames that pop up from time to time. The only thing I don’t like is when a reader decides to offer critical analysis of the writer in middle of the thread. There are some inexperienced writers who will learn a great deal from a more experienced beta-reader or through helpful, private, constructive criticism. I firmly believe this should be done via e-mail. I know everyone asks for feedback when they post – but there are ways and means – if you feel strongly that you are able to offer helpful advice about style or standard of writing, I know I’d rather it wasn’t quite so public. Just occasionally I’ve felt like I was watching someone get told off by the teacher in the middle of class.
7. Does feedback help to improve a writer’s craft?I don’t have any kind of track record as a writer, so this one is probably best to others. What I will say (because I can never let it lie) is that the few bits and bobs I have sent to be beta’d have improved as a result of the comments and suggestions made in the feedback. There’s something about the opinion of others – I know that Katharyn has already talked about this – which allows for a vital sense of objectivity in the development process.
Enough already.
jo x
) 
Well, you've never said that to me anyway, so I guess I'll just go away and cry me a river.
at: 8/5/02 7:23:13 pm
emoticons and "update soon!!!" from the readers). 
) and the words come easier.
Come Away With Me and She's A Keeper turned out far better than I could've ever imagined. They have exceeded my hopes and expectations and, for the life of me, I can not figure out how that happened.