Gaydar Discussion Thread

[Lindy]

Yeah, they had people looking at 'candidates' and their way to walk and move and said they were able to say by that who is a jew and who isn't. Quite scary.

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It's nothing. It's all.. nothing

[lustandrhymeremover]

I knew they used facial features, like the nose, but walk? What if you stub your toe? Suddenly you become Jewish? That's just messed up. WWII always gave me the creeps - Just that anyone could be that cruel is beyond me.



But, that's rather depressing for an otherwise cheerful thread, isn't it? Happier thoughts anyone?

"Pronouns make it hard to keep our sexual orientation a secret when our co-workers ask us about our weekend. 'I had a great time with...THEM.' Great! Now they don't think you're queer, just a big slut!"-Judy Carter

[pikachu1060]

Quote:

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Concerning this "finger" thing I seriously doubt it's scientific and I think it's way better that stuff like this isn't true 'cause it reminds me of some Nazi-stuff (no offense!).

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Well, i totally agree with that. Anyway, sometimes i just wish there was some way to know for sure if someone is gay or not. But at the same time, i'm aware that segregation would probably be a result of this... I mean, if the non-gay-friendly people had a mean to find out that someone is gay, that would be bad, wouldn't it? Imagine this: You go to an interview for a job, and the guy asks you, "show me yours fingers!"



Well, i guess it's better that there isn't something that give us away...

Chris
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There is no such thing as a problem without a gift for you in its hands
You seek problems because you need their gifts
Richard Bach - Illusions

[Cipher]

I heard of the finger thing in another context (I think it had to do with a correlation to risk for heart disease or some sort of cancer, in a study I think among men in that case). The finger length ratio mostly came down to a hormonal influence--I think during fetal development--so it also becomes loosely correlated to other things that have a similar hormonal correlation. Men and women tend to have different ratios.



Note that the reliable way to measure your finger lengths is on the palm side measuring from the crease where the finger meets the palm, centered along the width of the finger, measuring from the crease to the tip. Measure each finger independently and then compare the numbers. That makes it independent of how your finger moves side-to-side (like spreading your fingers). There might be another consistent way by bending all your fingers 90 degrees from your palm and measuring from the tip to the back of the last knuckle (where it meets the palm). Or you could presumably measure bone lengths in a flat hand X-ray, but that's hard to do on your own. These three methods could give slightly different ratios (and each hand could be a little different, too).



If you just eyeball it (typically from the back of your hand) it depends too much on how you hold your fingers, and by angling your fingers left and right you can make the apparent relative lengths of your index and ring fingers change by as much as a centimeter or so. If the study (was there a real study?) did it that way, it's fairly worthless.

[vix84]

My problem is that I have gaydar specifically for lesbians that are taken. I find out she's gay, but in a relationship. My gaydar is rendered useless as soon as a single girl walks past!

-------------------------

BUFFY: I'm like that kid
in the story, the boy who stuck his finger in the duck.
ANGEL: Dyke.
(off her confusion)
It's another word for a dam.


BUFFY: Oh. Okay, now that story makes a lot more sense.


Buffy, 'Gingerbread'

[Kieli]

Ok, so I've got itty bitty stubby little fingers and midget hands. Does that mean I'm not lesbian enough? Inquiring minds wish to know!

Love is tricky. It is never mundane or daily. You can never get used to it. You have to walk with it, then let it walk with you. You can never balk. It moves you like the tide. It takes you out to sea then lays you on the beach again. Today's struggling pain is the foundation for a certain stride through the heavens. You can run from it but you can never say no. It includes everyone."--Amy Tan "The Hundred Secret Senses"

[pikachu1060]

lol, yeah, i guess the finger theory is quite absurd

Though now, i look at my finger with awe... lol



No, seriously, i'm really wondering who carried out this study... just out of curiosity, i'd like to see it...

Chris
------------------
There is no such thing as a problem without a gift for you in its hands
You seek problems because you need their gifts
Richard Bach - Illusions

[lustandrhymeremover]

Haha! Sorry, that was the triumphant cheer. Turns out I was surfing and I just happened across the finger-length study. So, Chris if you want to check it out here it is:



www.cnn.com/2000/HEALTH/0...y.fingers/



It's actually kind of interesting, if a little far-fetched. Oh, and don't you just love that address? gay.fingers... hehe... You can have gay fingers...

"Pronouns make it hard to keep our sexual orientation a secret when our co-workers ask us about our weekend. 'I had a great time with...THEM.' Great! Now they don't think you're queer, just a big slut!"-Judy Carter

[scifiacid]

Okay, okay.. wait, lets see... index... hm... ring... hm... gay... hm? Well, my ring is shorter then my index does that make me... hm? not... gasp!

[Pipsqueak]

Okay, when I look at my fingers from the palm side of my hand, the ring finger is shorter. When I look at them from the back of my hand, the index finger is shorter.



Does this mean I'm bi?

~~~~~~~~


"We're just ... stupid." -- Buffy, on Season 6
Check out my Buffy videos at http://www.pipsqueaky.com

[slayer747]

Quote:

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It compared the finger lengths of lesbians to straight women, and found that lesbians, unlike straight women, tended to have index fingers that were shorter than their ring fingers

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oh my God!!! i guess i am straight afterall!!!







anyway, as for me, my gaydar works 100% now...



i just think that everyone that crosses my path is gay and let them prove me otherwise... works everytime!

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"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong, and those are the ones that change your life." - Jessie "Once and Again"

[pikachu1060]

Thank you so much, lustandrhymeremover, that was a good laugh Sounds like it isn't meant to be a joke, which made me laugh even more... But true or not... yay, my index finger is shorter anyway

Chris
------------------
There is no such thing as a problem without a gift for you in its hands
You seek problems because you need their gifts
Richard Bach - Illusions

[Underneathherclothes]

Ok, slightly worried about this 'i've got long hair so i won't get laid' thing.

After our fave couple, i tend to assume (wish) that people with long, cute hair and wearing skirts/dresses w/t style are more likely to be gay.

Short hair suits some people, but why make it a rule, and why make it automatically mean butch?

Maybe it's just me but that sort of thing just really makes me a mad truck driving moma!

Anyways, good luck with finding out if those girls are actually flirting with you, or just being friendly-argh-ladies r difficult sometimes

That 'glint in the eye' thing is so true. My friends catch me doing it all the time, especially in clubs, it's like laser beam eyes!

How bad could it be, if you should fall in love with me? How bad could it be-sexuality

[slayer747]

okay, so my friend will be having a birthday party by next month and we will go in with costumes...



mine will be this black velvet suit, with a white silk shirt unbuttoned underneath revealing a black bra, and then i will wear the devil horns and my tail's end will be a labrys.



i just really hope it will scream "lesbian" all over the place.

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"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong, and those are the ones that change your life." - Jessie "Once and Again"

[kukalaka]

Um, this is rather stupid, but I'm trying to calibrate my gaydar here:



Did any of the German Kitties (or anyone else, for that matter) happen to watch "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" last Monday and Friday?



I'd just like to know whether you also got the impression that candidate (the one who was on both shows, he's won 16.000 EUR, wanted to do a cruise "with someone else" and was accompanied by his ex-girlfriend, who he's "very good friends with") seemed to be "kinda gay"



And yes, I know, recognizing male gays is a really important skill for me, but I have to start somewhere

--

It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt. - Mark Twain

[slayer747]

i dunno, i am more aware, or shall i say, accurate when it comes to figuring out if a guy is gay... there's just something about them... aura, perhaps?

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"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong, and those are the ones that change your life." - Jessie "Once and Again"

[Mrs Vertigo]

My gaydar has never failed to fail me. It had to be put to sleep. From then on everyone in my world is straight until proven otherwise beyond any reasonoble doubt. ugh. I suck.

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“You know, if you weren’t such a bitch-queen from hell you and I would’ve gotten along just fine” – Me making with the friendly at Glory, in a dream where I was Buffy and she was crucifying me.

[Bicola]

I'm really fasinated about the whole index finger shorter than ring finger lesbin trait and also lesbians have short fingernails...



You see, on my left hand i have short nails and my index is much shorter than my ring finger BUT on my right hand i have long nails and my index is slighty longer than my ring finger!!



Does this mean i am bi?



I like this thread



Ps: I know you must think im weird with the whole different fingernail lengths but i assure you its a guitar thing.

[GigglesNSwing]

I don't know if Gaydar is accurate or not but we sure have fun trying to figure peoples preferences! If my grrlfriend & I spot a person we think is gay we look at each other with a knowing smirk & question, Family?

[Sweetjane]

well , thats one way to classify , but me and my raging queen buddy have always used the terms - Martini , for straight and Martini with a twist! for someone we suspect (or really wish) is gay. don't ask me where it came from , but i have a sneaky suspicion that he got it from Sex and the City ( his favourite programme)



and another note on the subject of well , sex and stuff ,i have a little tip for those who like to talk loudly in the streets about the sexually attractiveness of those passing you : we have worked over many years labouring over creating the essential system of using ranks of alcohol...ie "Look at that ice cold bud darling!....i really really want that long tall glass of vodka on the rocks....ect"



for me however , if i see someone to die for , i always say 'long island ice tea' because i luuuuurve it....



right enough of my stupidity...i'm going off to find a feather boa and a willing audience .....i mean , other than my small , cute pet dogs , whom luuuurve my dancing....i'm sure

"....we got high on travel and we got drunk on alcohol , and on love , the strongest poison and medicine of all" - Joni Mitchell

[strongwoman66]

It's very interesting to see you discussing gaydar. I almost laugh off this idea about fingers. Well, it's hard to

'feel' gay people nowday. I'm not even sure if I'm right when I guess this person's gay or bisexual. Just rely on my gut feeling. It's like a bell ringing in my mind, screaming the red sign. As if all of my body parts're on alert. Especially when I'm in my favorite class - Philosophy:sex and gender. You can imagine how many people're there! No wonder some told me this classroom's a good place to find a cute girlfriend. I'm almost looking at all of these beautiful girls.lol Anyway, it's right that it's hard to judge people with their clothes. A lot of people're very surprised to know I like to date people of the same sex b/c I don't look 'that'. I'm quite new at the culture of 'gaybar' so please don't mind my words. Hope you guys can introduce me to this world.



Cheers,

Strongwoman66

[slayer747]

these days, it really is hard to tell. i mean, i told my classmate in chem that i was gay (we were in a heated argument... he was insisting that men are better, that women cannot live without men... blah blah) and that i am a living proof i didn't really need them in a romantic way... he still wouldn't believe me. apparently, i don't look like one...

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"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong, and those are the ones that change your life." - Jessie "Once and Again"

[slowontheuptake]

I'm a definate believer in the power of gaydar. (I just wrote that sentance and and am now picturing a latenight infomercial complete with pitchman and dosens of people espousing the greatness of the product.) My intuition on gayness tends to be fairly accurate especially with men. Of course this is only for people I peg as gay. I'm not sure how accurate I am when it comes to women I peg as straight.

It generally comes from interaction or somtimes other peoples reaction to me. I tend to come off as a woman of nebulas sexuality. Thats my big word for saying bi and somewhat aloof. Gay women have a tendancy to try to find out if I'm gay. Not necessarily because thier attracted to me but because it's annoying. Also, when it occasionally happens, it's not hard to misenterpret intrest.

[slayer747]

well, of course, gaydar-wise... the length of a woman's fingernails is an indicator... but of course it doesn't work all the time.

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"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong, and those are the ones that change your life." - Jessie "Once and Again"

[themagicpixie]

Yup, slayer, fingernails... I remember seeing an interview with Ellen DeGeneres and she was saying: Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct with another woman?! Have you seen the length of those fingernails? Never gonna happen!



Which is funny because SS ended up playing EdG's girlfriend in "If These Walls Could Talk 2"!

[Hanki]

thought i'd jump in...



my gaydar works sometimes... you know when some other girl is standing waaaaaay too close to me in a rock club and batting her eyelids at me but usually it's not all that accurate.



oh and whoever said:

Quote:

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Ps: I know you must think im weird with the whole different fingernail lengths but i assure you its a guitar thing.

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i know exactly what you mean! i play guitar too, lol.

[cassiopeia191]

Talk to the person and if they play the pronoun game...or refuse to swoon over cute guys passing by (I developed a frighteningly fake enthusiasm when it comes to this)...there are signs.

Yeah, the fingernail thing is the only thing I could think of, too.

[girlofp]

i've come to the conclusion that my gaydar is always right.. i mean it isn't my fault that people i see and know are gay don't know they are gay yet!! *did that make any sense?*

to p: "I'm only here tonight because of you. You are the reason I am. You are all my reasons. Thank You." A Beautiful Mind

[Katty]

When I moved back to my home town of Glasgow (Scotland) in September 97, I started my 'coming out' process (to myself at that point.. my family between 6-24 months later). I had this preconceived notion of a Lesbian... short hair, jeans, t-shirt, Doc Marten shoes and little or no make-up (lol... me!)



Anyway, I was seeing women like this all over the place but once I started work and got to know some of these people, I discovered that it's just a natural 'Glasgow Woman' look and that the majority weren't lesbians at all! A perfect example of Gaydar gone wrong!



Another example would be two guys I've worked with in the last few years. One I was convinced was totally 100% gay and it turned out he was practically married, complete with mortgage and dog. Very in touch with his feminine side though - wouldn't leave the lunch table if all us girls were sitting talking about how we remove leg-hair, etc. He was fascinated by it. Hmm... thinking about it, maybe he just hasn't realised it yet - I was 29 before I did!



The second guy had a reputation as a womaniser, but again I always got the feeling that there was a bit more to him than that. One drunken Xmas night out, he told me he wondered what it would be like, but had never been with another guy. I live in hope.. lol.



These days, I find it a little easier to tell but that's mainly because my social life is 100% gay - the local Gay & Lesbian Centre, Gay/Lesbian bars, all of my friends are gay or lesbian. I do still use my Gaydar though - these days I find it's in the EYE contact. Or when my gf and I walk down the street together, it's the women that do a double take that set it off.



Kinda hard to pinpoint otherwise.



Kat



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Katty

Not a catty person, just a bit

older than the average Kitty!

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[slowontheuptake]

Fingernail length. hehe.

With the crowd I hang out with that's more likely an indication that she's an artist. Try sculpting with little half moon shapes on everything you touch. Not gonna happen.

Buffy: Let's face it: none of us are ever gonna have a happy, normal
relationship.

Xander: We're doomed!

Willow: Yeah!