The Lesbian Hand Thing - Biology and Homosexuality

[sprhrgrl]

This is random and silly. . . Maybe it should go in questions, maybe it should really be an MKF, but hey.



Xita's lovely av, here, reminded me of something:



I was playing with my girlfriend's fingers when she said something that confused me - "Oh, you're doing the lesbian hand thing." Now I consider myself a Good Lesbian, but I was unaware. . . Apparently lesbians like to play with eachother's hands?



So it's a silly stereotype, but apparently it's seen a lot of places.



Willow and Tara, for one - the av and Willowhand, at least. Where else have you seen it, W/Twise and other?

sprhrgrl.com

counting*stars

racism=sexism=homophobia

The truth shall set you free, but first it will piss you off. – Gloria Steinem

Edited by: DrG at: 6/30/03 10:59 pm

[kbk3022]

Hi, I'm not sure if this is what you're talking about but there was a discussion in the Gaydar Discussion Thread about a hand study that was conducted, could be what she meant.



Kasey

[mscheckmate]

I still wish I'd put a emoticon in my post about the finger-length study. It was meant to be tongue-in-cheek, actually, rather than a statement of scientific fact.



I think, though, that lesbians might notice other women's hands in general, because we tend to be sort of "hands on" in bed. Maybe that's what your gf was talking about.

"I really, really love giving you a hard time. I'm starting to think of it as foreplay." Mrs. Mscheckmate

[Jennpurr]

Hands! Or... women's hands to be more exact...



I love hands. I think it's become a new obsession of mine, besides eyes.



You know... I happen to think that Amber has really nice hands.



Jen

||My Fan Fiction and More!||
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
ALEX: I did a striptease in front of her mother! Are you listening?
MARIA: One nipple does not constitute a striptease, Alex.
ALEX: She saw my nipple? Oh, God! ~ Roswell, "Surprise."

[bluemote]

oh the 'lesbian' hands thing.........



i for one have always noticed an abundance of hand related images in lesbian movies (ie. the bedroom scene cuts to hands clasped in passion etc etc) i find this all unbearably naff, but then again maybe because i think it's all a bit of a cop-out. i mean, i like the ladies and the ladies hands but i'd rather look at other bits.plus i think it plays on the idea that lesbians can't do much in bed apart from hold hands. i mean, your hands should really be elsewhere?? *drifts into own thoughts*....



sorry if this has ruined the tone...but i'm glad it was posted because i've noticed it a lot and i'd like to know what everyone thinks

ps. no offense to those who like hands by the way it's not like i hate them or anything. and i guess i would sneak a look before.....well, before.

[SySnootles]

If you all will allow a non-lesbian to chime in on this topic...



I love hands, also. I have no idea why. They're amazing to look at. To think about what they are capable of doing, it's just mezmerizing. Five digits able to move independantly, in unison, in all directions. (I have a thing for piano players. Coincidence?)



I have noticed when hanging out with my gay and lesbian pals, the women do a lot more hand holding and caressing than the men. I never really thought much about that until now. Interesting. Now I'll have a big goofy grin on my face when they start with the digit touching.

[famer]

My neighbour gave me a new "lesbian hands" trick:



Go up to a Lesbian and tell them to look at their fingernails, immediately!



Answer:

Apparently, those who are more girlie will splay their fingers out away from their body (no bending at the knuckles).



Those who are less girlie will twist their wrist and curl their fingers up, with their nails pointing towards them.



See if it works for you! It did for me.

Edited by: famer at: 3/5/03 6:46:07 am

[Kalita]

I must conclude that it is because we have so much vested in what a partner's hands can do, than other people would be. I mean, you wouldn't want anyone with long nails (ouch) or dirty nails (ew), and after a while, there's probably a certain hand-aesthetic that would attract you over another.



It makes sense to me, that way...

"...not many people understood the karmic value of grilled cheese."

-Tara, Blue Athame's Angels and Goddesses

[xita]

I also read that there was a study that figured lesbians had ring fingers that were longer than their middle fingers. Unfortunately, my straight co-worker had that and I didn't. I am not very gay



When I came out, one of the tips someone gave me for spotting lesbians was looking at their fingernails.



famer , I guess I am girly

-----------------------------------

En un mundo de ilusión yo estaba desahuciado, yo estaba abandonado.

Vivía sin sentido, pero llegaste tú. -
Mana

Edited by: xita  at: 3/5/03 7:19:59 am

[Aradia785]

Hands! I'm just glad it isnt just me! Woo and Hoo! I've had a thing for hands since I could remember



I think Mscheckmate had it right... you can look at a girls hands and fingers and think of... well... we are "hands on in bed" and all...



Ann

[Jennpurr]

Xita, not very gay... Pffft!



Jen

||My Fan Fiction and More!||
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
ALEX: I did a striptease in front of her mother! Are you listening?
MARIA: One nipple does not constitute a striptease, Alex.
ALEX: She saw my nipple? Oh, God! ~ Roswell, "Surprise."

[sparrow]

xita not very gay? In what alternate reality is this true.

And yet, I just can't seem to care
Buffy as you know it is over

[LadyCallie]

Hehehe...... I'm a pianist-actor-gay type lover...who's dating a multi-instrument playing-actress-artist-photographer. And the study of our hands has happened. I have long fingers (a blessing in the music business and else where ) and my darling has very talented fingers (her fine motor-control is above average because of her art interest).



So "The Lesbian Hand Thing" is really a thing. Unlike straight couples who can be all over each other anywhere at anytime and not get glared at or worse, us of the Sparkly Rainbow Side had developed a way of showing our inner-passion. Fingertips are one of the highest nerve points in human body (there are more in the tongue and the clitoris though). So if you can find the right spots, hands can signal deep passion and an unspoken need to find a quiet out of the way spot. Or, as is more often (at least for me and my hunny) finger fondling is an unending physical reminder of our love for each other.





Plus it feels nice.

-LC

~*~

RealLiveTara is my RealLiveGirlfriend! *swoons*

"It doesn't have to be a really frenchish french, I just wanna feel your tongue."- my girlfriend last night.

"I don't wanna come out of the closet. All my clothes are in there!" -Me

[tkheaven]

ahh yes..hands, fingers...



or darn...I'm less girlie....bah..

Edited by: Warduke at: 3/5/03 12:24:28 pm

[sprhrgrl]

Actually, bluemote, that's where I was going. Scenes where there is hand holding and caressing and such. Xita's av really *is* a good example of it. I personally like the way Bound completely kicked the Hand Thing's ass. . .



I'd heard of the hand study, though, and it proved true for most of my queer friends. . .



Also, I've found that most lesbians have, of course, Freud's oral fixation - the majority of dykes at my old school had either highly chewed fingernails or highly chewed pens.



Oh, full of random.



--And famer? What about the drama femmes? Jazz hands and all that? Because that's what I think about when I splay my fingers. . .

sprhrgrl.com

counting*stars

racism=sexism=homophobia

The truth shall set you free, but first it will piss you off. – Gloria Steinem

Edited by: sprhrgrl  at: 3/5/03 1:52:09 pm

[frau rosenclay]

Great topic, i have had much discussion of this in my circle(s) of friends.

The lesbian hand thing was first pointed out to me when I was a teenager, out with a girl I was attracted to, and my flamer friend who was experinced in gay things, , Jackson. He pointed out that her and I did the lesbian hand thing, and i had no idea what he meant. Then he explained it, and it made sense in my life.

I have found it quite true.

[sheila wt]

Oh yes, LadyCallie, I so agree with you. I'm a very touchyhuggie kinda gal (I guess it's a Brazilian thing... ) and I thought about that so many times. It's hell to be in places where you can't really be free with your gf, so the hand thing comes in handy (ok, I know, that was *really* bad) .



I have long fingers and long fingernails (most of the time), and everybody always told me to learn piano, but I always liked my guitar better. Famer, I'm afraid I'm girlie... but I seem to be in very good company with xita on the boat too.



I think one of the things my gf loves more in me is my hands. She is always talking about them and showing them off to our friends...

--------------------------
"She had tasted Willow on her tongue, and she had worn Willow on her skin. There wasn't a shower in the world that could have washed that away." (Terra Firma, by Tulipp)

[Willster]

Maybe it should go in the gaydar thread, but I have this question.



According to Kalista who said: "I mean, you wouldn't want anyone with long nails (ouch)"



A girl with long nails is necessarily straight ?



But, I agree with the ouch..!

[sprhrgrl]

I think it depends on how you define long. They have to be long enough for scratches some places, and short enough to be able to avoid scratches other places. It mostly just depends on control.

sprhrgrl.com

counting*stars

racism=sexism=homophobia

The truth shall set you free, but first it will piss you off. – Gloria Steinem

[BabyJune]

i also play guitar, and i have the callused fingertips to prove it. They're not scratchy, just sorta hard on my left hand. I don't know if that's a turn-off or what, but i'm sure as hell not gonna give up the guitar. I also fence, which means short fingernails on my right hand so can control my foil. My life dictates my hands, what can i say?

[sheila wt]

Quote:

---

A girl with long nails is necessarily straight ?

---

Well, I can tell you that, if this is true, they certainly forgot to tell me...



Everything depends on how long you're talking about. I keep mine long for most of the time, but just long enough to look nice and to not hurt my gf. I can't imagine a lesbian with Barbra Streisand's nails...



All in all, I guess it's just a matter of habit. You get used to it and nobody get hurt... On the contrary, nails can be extremely erotic.

--------------------------
"She had tasted Willow on her tongue, and she had worn Willow on her skin. There wasn't a shower in the world that could have washed that away." (Terra Firma, by Tulipp)

[AutumnT]

Quote:

---

I also read that there was a study that figured lesbians had ring fingers that were longer than their middle fingers.

---

Actually it was not the middle finger but the index. The middle is always the long one. Both my index fingers are longer than the ring. hmm.

Autumn

-----------

BUFFY: I could wrestle naked in grease for a living and still be cleaner than after a shift at the Doublemeat.

WILLOW: Plus, I'd visit you at work every single day.

[LadyCallie]

Both my ring fingers are longer then my index fingers. Gotta remember to use them more.........





I had acrylic nails for the first few weeks with my hunny. they were gorgeous (I had them styled after Dru's nails...they were pretty long.) . When they started costing me more I took them off and Kat (my hunny) was grateful. She likes the feel of my fingertips better when my fake nails are off. I commonly keep my nails just above my flesh...long enough to look pretty polished, but not enough to hurt (and long nails hurt me).





What about rings? Does anyone take theirs off when doing the ?

-LC

~*~

RealLiveTara is my RealLiveGirlfriend! *swoons*

"It doesn't have to be a really frenchish french, I just wanna feel your tongue."- my girlfriend last night.

"I don't wanna come out of the closet. All my clothes are in there!" -Me

[relativegirl]

Quote:

---

Both my index fingers are longer than the ring. hmm.

---

relativegirl skips away chanting "I'm gayer than Autumn, I'm gayer than Autumn"

I stopped counting after the third one . . .

Edited by: relativegirl at: 3/5/03 10:35:56 pm

[AutumnT]

Heh. I mistyped.



Both my ring fingers are longer.



So there miss skippy.

Autumn

-----------

BUFFY: I could wrestle naked in grease for a living and still be cleaner than after a shift at the Doublemeat.

WILLOW: Plus, I'd visit you at work every single day.

[Jennpurr]

Quote:

---

relativegirl skips away chanting "I'm gayer than Autumn, I'm gayer than Autumn"

---

*snort*







Jen

||My Fan Fiction and More!||
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
ALEX: I did a striptease in front of her mother! Are you listening?
MARIA: One nipple does not constitute a striptease, Alex.
ALEX: She saw my nipple? Oh, God! ~ Roswell, "Surprise."

[Penrose Orleans]

Weird... my ring fingers are longer too... but that couldn't possibly be connected, could it?

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

BRAIN: "I must undo the damage I've done and repair your broken spirit."

PINKY: "Will it involve power tools?"

[tommo]

Waitaminute...relativegirl is gay???



Bloody hell.



And my ring fingers are longer than my index fingers. What does that mean? And does it make any difference when said fingers are um...thrusting anyway? Ahem.

"There's so much more to wiccan Willow than muff-diving gimmickry" ~ SFX

[xita]

Autumn you are right, I had it right back then though.



Anyway, yes I am still not gay



Damn index finger.

-----------------------------------

En un mundo de ilusión yo estaba desahuciado, yo estaba abandonado.

Vivía sin sentido, pero llegaste tú. -
Mana

[bluemote]

hey sprhrgrl aggree about the bound coment. it rocked (well the hand bit did anyway the rest of it was questionable but that's a whole 'nother story)



just to carry on with this intriguing experiment my ring finger is much longer than my index. which i find to be most useful.



and as long as we're going down this route... left or right or both?

i'm right handed but i normally use my left hand when i'm, well, um, you all know what i mean.