A few replies first,
Paul - I am confirming that I made apromise that there would be no smut (as VW with Tara... icky) and now I have borken
A promise.
If that is teasing I confirm there is teasing too.
And yes it is 5.19am right now. Eep.
The Big IT - It will be so worth it, I really hope that you think so when we get there.
Again with the smut rumour...I actually promised that there would be NO smut, rather than never promising that there would be some. If said smut were to occur then I am not sure that arm rubbing would play a big part. I know... I know... It would not be exciting without the arm rubbing - or gay - but I would have figured - if it existed or was going to - that rubbing of other things was more important.
Hermitstull - You can say it if you like... thanks. 100 posts... I figure probably 560,000 words maybe. The average paperback novel probably manages no more than 400 words a page so say 1400 pages.
As for the quote from Chance, well I was lucky enough to see it.
Thanks.
And so to Part 86... "Tara Gets Wet"... sorry... "Rain."
Enjoy.
Katharyn
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Title:
The Sidestep Chronicle – Rain (Part 86)
Author: Katharyn Rosser & Kerry Forrister.
Feedback: Constructive criticism always welcome.
katharynrosser@hotmail.comSpoiler Warning: Pretty limited. The story occurs in an alternate universe though reference is made to events that occur in both realities.
Summary: Tara gets caught in a storm.
Disclaimer: I still don’t own any of the copyrights or anything else associated with BTVS. All rights lie with the production company, writers etc, etc. I am making zilch from this series of stories.
Rating: 15
Couples: It’s so close that you can taste it.
Notes: This one has a Kerry inspired ending. That is to say that she wrote something, I took it and adapted it to fit what I needed – but much of it remains hers.
Thanks To: Hey, isn’t it about time I thanked Miss Benson and Miss Hannigan again? Sure it is… them and the usual suspects.
The Sidestep Chronicle
Rain
By
Katharyn Rosser
Not for the first time Tara bemoaned the fact that the Maclay house had been built so far from the road. She even muttered to herself, which was something that she hardly ever did. There were extenuating circumstances though.
Family legend had it that the house had been built alongside where the road should have gone before it was diverted by some official on the payroll of the highway construction company – and the upshot was that it was a heck of a walk from the road to the house. A good fifteen minutes when a person was loaded down with shopping. She couldn’t imagine what her life would’ve been like if the state had put the road where they’d said they were going to. That corrupt official, if there had been one, had a lot to answer for.
After all… the vampires had stopped in their barn because it was isolated. By the road they wouldn’t have been so out of the way. Things would have been so different for them all.
She might never have met Willow.
But it was fate. And that meant that there were some things that would have just
been. Maybe she could have met Willow without losing her family?
It was beside the point now. Life was what it was. Looking better and better. Indoors at least.
She really was going to have to get the truck looked at so that she could start using it. And before that she could try and get her licence. Right now there were small animals nesting in it and she wasn't about to kick them out for no reason. She could wait and in a couple of months when it was summer, and warmer out, she would ease them out of there.
It was a nice walk as walks went. The hill up from the roadside wasn’t too steep for someone to walk, even loaded down with groceries and when you looked to either side the view went for miles and miles. She and Willow had already enjoyed a few sunrises and sunsets at the top of this hill. Of course that was working from the top – which was easier. But now, as they entered spring, that was a view that was tinged with new greens. New life. It was good to look at that. To be rid of dreary winter.
Of course that
would have been what Tara was looking at if she hadn’t been so focussed on the rain that was pelting her in big drops. Lots of big drops. Almost a wall of big drops in fact. Soaking her clothes and weighing her down even more than the shopping.
When she had gone out it had been nice, nothing on the weather forecast about showers – let alone a rain storm - and even half an hour ago, looking at the sky from town there had been nothing bad there. Now all of a sudden she found herself in the middle of a rainstorm. Even worse the puddles had formed quickly and her both her feet were already squishing inside her boots after she had misjudged the depth of more than one. Still, she had got to the point now, with her clothes clinging to her and her boots all squishy, that she couldn’t get any wetter. The only reason she was hurrying at all was because she didn’t want any of the unsealed food to get too wet t be usable. The fresh bread was probably already a write-off but that wasn’t too bad. Everything else was in plastic, a box, foil or a tin.
And still the view was nice. Looking to her right there was the rain, grey on the landscape. The clouds mustn’t have been moving very fast as she still seemed to be caught in the front edge of it – when she looked to her left, down the shallow valley, there was bright sunshine – a rainbow even.
She didn’t think there was a bit of her that was actually dry anymore. She thought about it, focussing on different parts of her body by moving a little and feeling the wet there. What hadn’t been pelted by rain had been soaked by the trickling under the sway of gravity. Willow would tell her off for not taking a coat with her.
Chastised by a feisty red head. Even when she was out in this rain the idea made her laugh out loud as she imagined Willow’s face.
Little Miss Prepared was never going to get caught out was she? She had to smile to herself because there was no one else there, but Willow… By the Goddess Willow was wonderful. She was a constant pleasure in Tara’s life. Something she had feared was going to be fleeting and temporary had become something that was going to be forever.
Willow was
always going to be her friend. Living with each other had brought them closer and closer every day. Supporting each other in their bad moments had made them committed to getting the other through them. And the sharing the good times, the funny things and the closeness was what had made them such really good friends. They just clicked. Perhaps no one would have guessed it if they had just met in “better” circumstances but they complemented each other. They fitted in each others lives as best friends should do. At least as Tara understood it. She’d never had a friend like Willow.
Maybe there were no better circumstances than existed now? Okay so it had started out tough, got harder… but now, now they were good together as friends.
Sleeping together too… which had started as a comfort thing and now it was just who they were. They slept together because they were so comfortable with the other one being there that to be alone was the strange thing. They were so lonely when the other one wasn’t in that bed that they had to get up and track them down. There were still little things that they tried to avoid out of respect for each other’s memories – things that were overtly sexual or implied an intimacy beyond that of the friends that they were – but it was an almost humorous avoidance now. They could laugh about the little slips that were inevitable rather than turning bright red. They didn’t have to talk about those things – or fear talking about them. It was just the pattern that they were in.
It was just a part of who they were now and Tara, as she trudged towards the house with her feet still all squishy, was pretty happy with that. Sure she might have liked… something else but she was more than happy with what she’d got. It was more than she had dreamed was possible. Willow, as a friend, in her life by choice. Human too.
Even if Willow chose to leave they would still be as close – they would still be good friends. They would still be good together when they met up and that was more than she ever could have hoped for.
The implication though, as she analysed her own thoughts, was that she was still thinking of that ‘something else.’ It wouldn’t go away. The thing was that she was so happy she didn’t much care right now.
She hadn’t been as wet as this since the night that she went to find Lilah, to ask for her help. If some divine being had offered her what she had now with Willow back then she would have snatched their hand off and never given it back.
This was so much more than she had ever deserved.
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It was the strange sound that made Willow leave the living room and the PC that she was working on. It sounded like rain, thumping on the walls, windows and roof – but as she turned the desk chair to look out there was nothing but bright warming sunshine… Which she liked.
Then she saw the rainbow in the distance. So there was rain and it sounded as if it was falling hard. Which meant that they were just on the edge of the storm. Going to the kitchen she could see that storm. Big, brewing, clouds dumping splattering rain on the house. It was the water cycle in action. In her head her studies were coming to the fore – which was good. If anyone had been interested she could have explained the whole thing from rainfall to runoff. From river to ocean and back again via evaporation.
Except no one was much interested as she was the only one who was there right then. No need to show off either.
It was good to know things like that. It was good to know
everything. Knowing, in general, was a very good thing. And the more she looked for things to know, the more she found out and the better things were. It was like the knowledge thing was a mirror of her life. It just kept getting better and better.
She liked to think of it as catching up with her studies, but she knew that Tara was right – she really was, just a few months after starting that catching up, already looking at material that was designed for college courses. That was the value of excluding the frivolous free periods and the things that she already knew from her study roster. She had drawn it up herself – and plotted it on a spreadsheet. Five good hours of studying every day – minimum – and she could do that when she was at her most productive as well. This was how school should have been – with work that was tough enough to test a student and with self-motivation as the key factor.
She had lots of self-motivation. It was like she was the motivation girl personified. At least for herself. Motivating others… well actually she was managing it for Tara. Perhaps she was really the motivation girl.
She was so motivated that Tara said she was ‘Crazy for the knowledge.’ Maybe her friend was right about that – by any conventional standards. Whizzing through two and a half years of high school – without any teachers – in less a little more than three months was sort of crazy, but she’d done it because she could and because she wanted to. And, as she was making her own time, she’d been able to spend plenty of time with Tara too – they had a social life. Even if it was pretty much limited to the house and sometimes down in the town. She had got far enough that she could think of easing back a little, revising what she knew ready for the standardised tests that she intended to apply for – as soon as they figured out how to bring Willow Rosenberg back from the officially dead list without creating all sorts of trouble for themselves. But the easing back, that meant, as the good weather came, she and Tara could get out more.
Good weather? Not yet though – not on this side of the house anyway. Which was good – because getting out more would soon mean getting the two horses from Tara’s uncle who had been looking after them and bringing them back here.
Taking care of the horse… she had been persuaded about that – she was actually sort of looking forward to it. Tara had told her how she had loved to take care of them – though mucking them out didn’t seem to be quite as much fun – and Willow could get behind that. Grooming and feeding. She’d tried the sugar lump thing as a child. She’d liked the soft furry noses but the rabid pursuit of those sugar lumps had scared the wits out of her.
It was just when they opened their mouths and showed those giant teeth that she got the wiggins. They were herbivores, they ate grass. Oh and sugar lumps – which were bound to make them all hyperactive – it would be like her having coffee. And what the heck did they need teeth the size of Gibraltar for anyway? There was only one answer and she well knew what it was – biting of arms. Clean off with teeth like that at their disposal.
Then, Tara had insisted gently, over several discussions that had got less and less hypothetical, the safest place was riding them – where the teeth couldn’t get at her. It seemed like a logical argument after Willow had refused to let go of the idea of arm-biting but Willow knew that horses couldn’t actually ‘like’ being ridden. Who would want someone to sit on them like that? And what would they do then? They would throw Willow off, possible trample or kick her and only
then turn around to bite her arm off. The biting of arms was obviously very important to horses.
Why? Because they could – what other reason did they need?
She sighed… Tara was so looking forward to it that she sort of had to at least try - and trying would be doing her bit to look after one of them. As long as Tara was there at the start to stop them attacking her. And as long as she didn’t have to ride them – at least not… well not for a long while. Riding was more of a long term plan. With no fixed completion date.
Now that was her definition of ‘smart,’ which was what Tara frequently called her – ‘off the chart smart,’ ‘smarty pants.’ It was teasing but it was friendly teasing and she knew that Tara was proud of her – which was totally fine because she was proud of Tara too. Tara wasn’t formally studying with her – she hadn’t needed to look at a lot of the stuff that Willow had been doing, but as Willow got beyond the High School subjects she had found that Tara was with her, or using the same resources, more and more.
Tara was having fun with the learning thing too, just with a little less obsession and, to Willow’s frustration, without a proper schedule. She’d said that Willow’s enthusiasm was infectious – and like… good. As long as Tara was happy… which she was unlikely to be looking like she did right now. She looked out of the kitchen window and saw Tara coming across the yard not even bothering to hurry.
Tara should have had a schedule to study by – maybe she would fix one for her. Still that wasn’t the important thing now.
She was as wet as she was going to be. Maybe as wet as she had ever been in her life – at least with clothes on. Poor baby. Willow knew that she would have to do something about that. It was wondering just what to do that occupied her mind as Tara reached the door.
Willow could imagine the sigh as the shopping bags touched the ground.
----------------------
She didn’t head in right away, there was no hurry now was there. Besides squishy feet had to be taken care of before she went inside traipsing either water or mud. Standing there on the stone of the back porch she set the shopping bags down, hearing the cans clank. She was going to have to put all those away too – but first she had to dry off.
No.
First she had to get in out of the rain. She unlaced her boots and levered them off her feet, feeling the socks that were thick with water being squeezed, the water escaping into her boots. No matter where she put them they weren’t going to be dry for days, which would be fine as long as the rain stopped – otherwise the whole place was going to become a mudbath and she would need them just to go and get the mail.
Next she took those sodden socks off, and stood barefoot outside, protected a little from the worst of the rain by the house itself. The door opened just as she was ringing the water out of them. Okay so it wasn’t like a torrent or anything, but Willow was there right when what there was hit the stone. She saw it splash her friends own cosy, dry socks.
“Wow,” Willow said.
Tara looked at her, with a resigned smile. She knew that Willow was going to make fun of her, she just had to see how that was going to work. Teasing was something that they did.
She liked it.
“You’re all wet,” the red haired woman continued and there was something in her tone. It had sounded for a moment like… just like… But Willow was grinning. She knew just what it had sounded like. And while it was good that they could joke about that, it had also been kind of creepy. “Sorry,” Willow went on.
It wasn't gone – the hurt wasn’t – but it was better than it had been. The vampire was another time, another place. Different to where
they were now. They were different – both of them. It wasn't Willow and it was almost as if it hadn’t ever been her sometimes. Willow helped her to forget these things because neither of them could stop remembering.
Between them they were doing so much better – time definitely was the great healer and Tara wasn’t sure that she had ever believed that was possible back when things had been bad. Willow took the boots from the porch beside her and emptied them out herself. “Come in Tara,” Willow said and Tara followed her instructions, intending to head straight for the bathroom and a nice warm shower. Except the nice warm shower would be sort of a cold shower on account of the element giving out. And the water heater hadn’t been on long enough to allow her to have a bath.
Cold showers… not what she wanted right now.
“No,” Willow said, “Stay right there.”
“But I’m all wet,” Tara argued wondering what her friend was intending. She really… at the very least she needed to get out of her wet clothes and get dry before she caught a chill.
Willow waved a finger and her after she put the boots in the drying room on top of the recently turned on water heater. “You’re not coming inside like that,” She told her firmly.
Tara had to smile – when Willow got determined about something it was tough to change her mind or deter her. She had focus – focus that she wouldn’t have believed of the vampire. Perhaps it had just been that the vampire was focused on other things – things that she didn’t like to think about. In fact she didn’t like it so much that she was going to stop – and just think about her friend instead.
That was much better. She felt warmer already.
“It’s my house,” she said and it sounded weird to say it. It was her Daddy’s house. It had always been that to her.
But no. Now it
was hers.
The name on the deed was hers after the reading of Daddy’s will. But it was sort of theirs.
They had made it liveable – into a home again. She and Willow had done that. It featured touches of Willow’s style and tastes in many different places within the walls.
She was just going to think about this Willow, not the other one. Just the one who told her now “And I’m keeping it pretty for you. Wait there and I’ll be right back.”
Tara didn’t argue with her, even as the cold started to get to her. The rain had seemed fairly warm – it was just when she stood still that her body seemed to realise how soaked she was, reacting to that with a shiver.
-------------------
Willow knew what she was about to do. It was like the friend thing – but maybe a little more so. With fluffy things. Nothing bad there at all. New, fluffy, but not at all bad. She made her way through the house in search of what she needed. Some of it she wanted to take to the kitchen with her, some of it she was going to need in other places later. Some of this she had been secretly kind of waiting for.
It was just that they had avoided
this specific kind of friend thing until now. Maybe it wasn’t a friend thing at all. Maybe it was a closer thing than that? Maybe even closer than a best friend thing – and they were best friends. They were each other’s only friend – so that made them best friends by default… but it
was more than that. She felt so comfortable with Tara, it was as if she had known her forever – her whole life. It was more than nice. It was all comfy and the sort of place that she wanted to be.
Which was why she didn’t care what this might look like now. They had been tip-toeing around each other for so long – less so since the joy that was the holiday celebration but still… After the holidays Willow hadn’t even realised that they were still doing the tip-toe thing for a long time. They’d been able to hold hands when things got rough without thinking twice about it. They’d been able to actually start out holding each other in bed at night, rather than finding themselves like that in the morning, which was much, much better than just nice.
It wasn't a sex thing at all – god not that - but it wasn't just a comfort thing either. They just held each other now because it
felt nice and it was what they both needed from each other to get to sleep. And wanted. And why not? They were in each other’s lives.
There was just one little thing that they still avoided – that was getting naked around each other. They might sleep together but they didn’t get undressed whilst the other one was in the room – which was just like weird. They had both done gym at school. There should have been nothing different about changing here in front of someone else than there had been there.
It was weird but safe. Because there did seem to be a difference.
It wasn't that Willow was looking for that – she didn’t
need to see Tara get naked, nor did she need to strip off for her – it wasn't like she was some sort of voyeur. It was more that she couldn’t understand why they both had this hang-up about it with everything that had happened to and between them.
It was just… she didn’t know what she wanted, but it wasn't tip-toeing.
Why did Tara feel she had to go to the bedroom first to get undressed at night? Why did she have to go to the bathroom after that so that Willow could get undressed and into the modest attire that they chose to wear to bed with each other. They’d never discussed it – it had just sort of happened to them and it was like -
false. It was something that they shouldn’t have had to be – embarrassed or careful in case they stirred up some sort of memory that hurt the other person.
Picking up the warmed towel from the heated rail in the bathroom, then grabbing Tara’s robe from the back of the bedroom door she went back to the kitchen. To where Tara was shivering. The poor girl was wet through and she was cold now too. Willow had to do something about that.
She had to do something.
It was like they were stuck – neither one thing nor the other. Willow couldn’t help feeling that, as close as they were, they should have been closer. She wasn't sure whether that was the right thing for them or just a feeling that she was having and that uncertainty was what had stopped her from pushing anything along. Besides pushing might lead to smoochies and smoochies were going to lead to awkward questions that had to be answered – and they might not like the answers. And when they found the answers and they didn’t like them then how were they supposed to forget that they knew the answers? They couldn’t. And if they couldn’t then they couldn’t forget that they had asked the questions either.
There was no way, after that, to pretend that there were no questions and answers. No matter what they might be.
It was likely to be a whole awkward sweaty palm thing. Better, for now, just to see where events took them and figure out just how far that could possibly be. Because Willow was looking – she really was looking now.
Even if, right now, she was going to have to make out that she wasn’t doing the looking thing at all. Because that would be intrusive, embarrassing and… oh so much fun. Damn propriety.
She invited Tara to do what they had so far steadfastly avoided. “Strip Tara.”
“P-Pardon?” the other woman asked with an face that suggested mild shock at the very least. Maybe verging on swooning.
“Come on Tara, you need to get out of those wet clothes, then we can dry them out – and you,” Willow told her and as Tara weighed up her words she held out the huge, heated bath towel. “Before this gets cold too,” she added. Tara could almost get lost in a towel as big as that. “Seeing as how it is all warm and fluffy right now.”
Tara watched her for a little while longer, as if she suspected that this was just some big, Willowish prank – and Willow had to admit that she had given Tara reason to suspect that from time to time. Willow had found that she liked to gently tease – even if she had to create the situation for that herself. It wasn't as if those really counted as pranks. Just… teasing. Gentle teasing.
Maybe there was a little concern in there too. Tara knew as well as she did what was being suggested. The naked thing. Well nearly naked anyway. That all depended on just how wet Tara was she supposed and there was a level of meaning that she had missed up until that very moment. She felt herself flush with embarrassment and Tara probably thought it was about the naked thing.
“I won’t peek,” Willow reassured her and deliberately looked away into the corner of the room where there was a fascinating shelf with no less than ten jars on it. Ten jars and a number of bottles and cans. . Ten jars. Different jars. All shapes and sizes. Jars. Glass. And one that was plastic.
As she noticed Tara start to move out of the corner of her eye she deliberately looked back to Tara and added, “much,” before Tara could get too far along and it wouldn’t be so funny.
Before Tara could respond to that though she had already turned her head back to the corner. The warm towel was waiting for her friend to step into its embrace, which was sort of her embrace too, but Willow knew where to draw the distinction between the towel and herself. She just hoped that Tara saw it was in the same place.
It didn’t take long for her to start hearing the slap of soaked clothes on the tiled floor as Tara took them off. It was so unlike her just to drop her clothes like that – even if they were going straight in the washer – that she wondered was doing it deliberately? To attract her attention? Well if she was then Willow
was attracted. Attracted, drawn and curious. She couldn’t resist the tiniest peek and oh… there was something to peek at. Tara saw her looking, started to cover herself modestly and then gave her a sort of ‘Why should I?’ smile.
Why should she indeed? It was nothing that Willow hadn’t glimpsed in their life together here. It was nothing that Willow didn’t remember seeing
before – up close and very personal. Nothing that she didn’t remember touching, caressing and playing with. Even if it hadn’t really been her that had been eliciting the responses from Tara. She remembered the responses too. Though she might not like the way that had worked… she couldn’t help remembering it and sometimes… sometimes she wanted to replace that in her memory. Not only with something better – but with something that was
her.Sometimes… before she got a grip on herself and wondered whether that was for the best. Let alone whether it would work out if it happened. Rationalising - that was what stayed her hand, sometimes literally. That and the fact that love was something which, though she remembered the passions of the vampire and crushes of the girl she had been, she had no idea how to carry forward and turn into something mutual and real. That was… if these thoughts went anywhere then it had to go there. Yes passion was all very well… but it was nothing – worse than nothing – without the love that she’d never known.
Still this might just help break down another barrier between them.
Tara, almost naked by the door now, walked over into the towel and Willow found that she
couldn’t look at her. Not that she didn’t wonder – curious what effect it might have on both of them – but because Tara wouldn’t want her to. She didn’t want to disappoint Tara by being like that other Willow and so caught up in sensations. She didn’t want to disappoint Tara… or ever hurt her.
No matter what she thought, felt, wondered or wanted - Tara was the important thing. Nothing was going to happen without Tara wanting it and making it clear that she did really want it. Willow had promised herself that. Besides it gave her lots more time here, as she wrapped her friend in the warm towel, to work her own way through the worry about what might happen. She wasn’t sure that anything could, would or should happen – but she knew that she was interested in answering those questions. One way, or the other.
And having a towel in her hands was really helpful – it did wonders for the sweaty palms. Tara stopped shivering almost as soon as it closed around her body and Willow didn’t even have to press it to her. Some parts were pressing all by themselves. Gosh… look at those.
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Oh by the goddess…. She almost wanted to go to heaven right now. It might not really be anything like this but Willow’s actions, teasing but innocent, had awakened thoughts and feelings that she hadn’t had in quite a while. All the things that she hadn’t even allowed herself mentally to explore. Let alone emotionally or physically. All of this time and she hadn’t even been able to… herself… She hadn’t wanted to because she knew that it would have been Willow that she was thinking of and that would have been dangerous for both of them.
They were in a really good place and she didn’t want to… ohh… but she did as Willow started to take care of her as perhaps only she could.
Willow rubbed her body down, starting at the top with her neck and her shoulders, before bringing a flap of towel up to press gently over her face. It was a warm fluffy caress almost – but she was sure that Willow was just making sure not to poke her in the eye or something like that. In fact it felt like Willow was trying to get an impression of her face – just by touch. Through a towel. That was going to be tricky.
Willow carried on down to her collar bone. Lower… oh goddess lower and staying forward too. Her body’s reaction was as undeniable as it was automatic. Rough, yet soft, warm towelling rubbing over her skin… and the skin that it was rubbing right now. The movements were brisk and efficient from a drying point of view – definitely not lingering in any way at all. Not lingering… but Willow wasn’t exactly avoiding anything either. Nor focussing…
Willow was just doing her usual efficient best, applying herself to the task at hand. In her hands. She was in Willow’s hands. She liked Willow hands… especially
that Willowhand right there. She could think of other uses for Willow hand too… Ohh… this was almost too much. It was taking her to bad, desire filled places… and it was nice to visit.
No… it was too far. Just far enough… Not far enough.
Focus Tara!
It was just because they were friends. Willow didn’t want her to catch a cold – they were friends. Willow was just doing the friend thing. She’d bathed Willow in those first, wild, days here. She’d had to in order to keep her clean. She’d done the same for Willow as Willow was doing for her now. Except this time it was without the bathing first… so Willow probably sort of owed her this. Or she owed Willow this.
She hadn’t worried about anything then – she’d just had to do it. And that was probably how Willow felt right now. She just had to do this for her friend Tara, and that was that. It was a friend thing. A getting warm and dry thing.
Willow was behind her, holding the towel around her, but when she rubbed her back there were moments that the towel was no longer covering her and Tara didn’t care at all. She wouldn’t if Willow had been round the front to look at her. Tara knew that she was… she might not have been always wrapped in the towel but she was definitely wrapped in the moment. Her body was there. Her mind… that was some way behind the body. A distant second in the race. She had to stop thinking like this.
She had to stop feeling like this before she said or did something that was inappropriate… inappropriate like letting Willow kneel behind her and towel down her lower body, front and back… Her belly… oh… but not quite that low. Down her legs to her toes and back again after picking her feet up. She reminded herself of a horse being shod as she gave Willow the soles of her feet to dry for her.
Can’t have wet footprints – or nasty slips.
And Willow was on the way back up her legs making sure that they were all as dry as the rest of her. The backs of the knees, inside her slightly parted thighs as Willow determined the pose. And yes Willow rubbed against the wet cotton that still covered a part of her body. This time Willow did avoid a part of her though, sticking to the sides and the rear of her underwear.
Which was a good thing. Definitely the better part of valour – the discretion thing. The taking care not to go too far. Besides she would be able to rub… well rub it dry. After.
Oh yeah. Right. That was all she was thinking wasn’t it? And Willow had said something – Tara had missed it. “What?” She had missed it entirely thinking about the rubbing and where that was going.
“You all dry?” Willow repeated as she stood up, still behind her.
Her body screamed at her to answer ‘Nearly,’ so that Willow might just do that last place, but her mind and her heart were the parts of her that answered Willow. “Thank you yes.” She was naked to the waist and Willow set the towel aside and picked something else up from the kitchen table. She… she looked across the room at the reflection that was offered and she saw Willow looking back at her.
Distorted. She saw herself too. In the shiny stainless steel bowel that was hung from a shelf. “You’re still peeking,” Tara told her, looking around, but as she looked one way Willow came around the other side of her. She turned her head back and Willow winked at her. Willow was peeking? And she was the one stood here practically naked… peeking in her own way.
There was no need for the pan now… Willow was right there, but her friend was only looking into her eyes as she held open the robe for her. Tara turned around and slipped her arm in the sleeve, then the other and Willow closed it over and around her. Not peeking so much anymore then. Willow let it hang there until Tara tied it for herself, just resting her hands on her shoulders to straighten it up.
Maybe there was a drip from her still untended hair that hit Willow’s hand, because the still moment was suddenly gone and Willow stroked her fingers through the long, blonde, hair.
“Go into the living room, by the fire and I’ll dry your hair for you,” Willow told her.
She turned and smiled. It would be all cosy in there. There would be the fire. There was her kind of naked but for a couple of thin pieces of fabric and there would be Willow with her.
It sounded the sort of thing that her dreams were frequently made of… In fact had she actually dreamed this? Maybe… she just didn’t quite remember.
And she couldn’t find it in her to worry about it – or to tell Willow that she would do it herself. That she really should wash it first. She just… didn’t want to. She wanted to let Willow take care of her, as she had said that she would. Willow had always respected their limits… even if she had seemed to push them just now. But she had pushed them because she was doing something nice for a friend and that was never wrong.
And it had been nice.
Nice and sensual.
Sensual like… like Willow putting her clothes on to wash? That sort of broke the spell. Just a little – just for a moment. She left Willow getting the conditioner from the cupboard to put into the machine and went through into the other room where she had been told to go. In her dream… hadn’t she sat on the floor in front of Willow… right there? Maybe not – but she chose to now. Waiting for Willow to finish up and come to complete the tableau.
Was there something more behind what Willow had done? She was scared of either answer.
But scared in a good way. The sort of scared that could come out with answers that both seemed okay.
Scared in a nice way. But still scared. She folded her legs under herself as she sat in front of the chair that Willow had claimed as her own. It had used to be her Mom’s and Tara wouldn’t ever have felt comfortable taking her place there – but she liked the fact that Willow seemed to love to sit there. A few minutes later Willow came into the room, carrying another towel. Somehow her hairbrush was already there on the arm of the chair and Tara hadn’t noticed it.
Willow had intended to do this for her and she wondered if Willow ever guessed about the other person who had used to sit in that chair and brush her hair for her. Willow didn’t even know that it was
her chair. She could just sit in it as she was now… not knowing anything of the past – just focused on the present and the future.
Whatever that held.
-------------------
“Who knew,” she asked Tara after about ten minutes of brushing the other woman’s still damp hair, “that you were a hairbrush ho?”
Tara placed her cheek on Willow’s knee and let the attention continue. What Willow had needed to do she had done in the first minutes. All of this… this was just indulgence. She liked to indulge Tara.
“Not just the brush,” Tara replied. “It’s the person that uses it too.” She said that very quietly and Willow could understand why.
Because wow… that was… that was like an admittance of… something. That was like ‘I like you brushing my hair… please do that a little more,’ or something like that. Wow. Not that she didn’t already know what Tara liked… it had only taken a moment to see how she responded to the motion. The caress of the brush.
She was like a cat responding to being stroked.
Tara seemed to think on what she had said too. “I mean… my Momma used to do this for me, after bath time. When I was little.”
Willow tried to imagine little Tara and found that she could see the scene. She knew what Tara had looked like back then. There were pictures – and she knew what Tara’s Mom had looked like too. It was a nice thought.
Maybe what Tara had said was backing off some from what those earlier words might have suggested but it was still a nice image. She could see it so clearly. There were pictures all over the house of her Mrs Maclay. Tara seemed to have got a few more out as she had found them and bought some new frames for them. Sometimes it was hard to know whether it was actually a picture of Tara – except that taken a few years ago it couldn’t be. They were so alike, Mrs and Miss Maclay. Now that they were at similar ages it was almost spooky… but also kind of nice, having Mrs Maclay looking down on them – Tara had obviously loved her so much.
Still loved her.
Tara was full of love.
And because Tara liked it… that meant that she pretty much did too.
Some people might have thought of this as a romantic scene. The fire, the touching, the semi-nudity on Tara’s part as Willow knew that the robe was hanging more than a little open by now – even if she couldn’t see. She had her leg entwined with one of Tara’s arms and she had no idea who had entwined who. If either of them had intended it.
The idea of a romantic scene… romantic moods… by the fire. It didn’t bother her to think about that. It was just not quite right for now, here… yet. So she sat with Tara between her legs, the other woman resting her cheek on her knee and enjoyed the closeness of her friend.
She didn’t think that they were going to leave for a while.
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Tara’s hair was long since dry and they had moved from the armchair and floor to the comfort of the couch. There had been a couch in Sunnydale and Tara had always liked that. Even if the company was so much better here. She had also stopped tightening the tie of the robe around herself a while ago. Not that she was deliberately letting it all hang out or anything, but there was definitely a new comfort in Willow’s close, and non-sleeping, vicinity. They had… they’d stepped over a threshold. Another one. Not that the place they had entered was necessarily a different one. It just had a threshold.
Dinner had been reheated pasta bake which they’d enjoyed right here. She’d found herself in the kitchen with her robe hanging open and oven gloves on her hands. Looked down at herself and hadn’t even managed to be embarrassed by it. She’d just wanted to get back to the cosy living room with Willow. Which she’d done and they’d shared the bowl of pasta watching the videos that she had picked up for them in town – and which hadn’t suffered in the rain.
Once their dinner had gone down she’d found that Willow had started to make herself comfortable, leaning into her arms and she’d let her do that. It was like all that had happened since she had got home had broken down a barrier between them. Comfortable, day or night now, was with each other.
Most comfortable was virtually snuggling up together and staying that way. She thought though, that early in the second film, Willow’s attention was diverted from the screen to… well her. She was aware of the redhead laying along the couch at full stretch, with her head in Tara’s lap. Some of the time Willow was watching the screen with a cheek on her knee, but the rest of the time she knew that Willow was looking up at her.
She didn’t pay that much attention to it though… to whether Willow was watching her face or the robe exposing her as they moved from time to time. Either was good. No… no either wasn’t good. No… it couldn’t be the exposed flesh because that would mean…
No. She couldn’t start to assume that. They were just… comfy in snuggle mode and Willow just wasn’t too interested in the movie.
Tara was finding it hard to think too hard to think about the plot too. Willow had gone through so much in recent months. She’d been destroyed and reborn. She would never be able to go back to the same innocence that she’d had before she’d been turned… but neither did she have the wisdom that the lost years should have given her – except in abstract memory. There was no experience there. And Willow… she wondered if Willow was seeking that out now. Experiences?
She looked down into Willow’s eyes. But they weren’t seeking or anything. They were just happy and more than a little contented. Willow was contented there, in her lap.
Her lap… Just hers. She who’d had so much to do with that destruction and rebirth. Willow trusted her, liked her. They were friends and they were all the comfort that each other needed - even during the early days after Willow had returned. Weeks… months even where life had been a horror for Willow and Tara had been sure she was going to leave when that period was over.
Tara felt sometimes like she had taken a terrified child and built her up into an adult but that wasn’t the whole of it. She’d helped Willow deal with the burden of all that she had done. But Willow had helped her with all the same things. At first just be needing her – but after the worst by being there for her too. And after that… Willow had taught her how to enjoy life.
And that had shown her what life was… it was good.
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Willow looked up at Tara from below… and aside from the fact that she could see up her nose sometimes, there was the much more desirable aspects of that face there… And well she had to stop thinking of what, when Tara moved, was almost within the range of her lips. She had to stop thinking about what she wanted to do. Reach up with her hand… with her lips.
She sighed gently and watched the edge of the light robe blow. Her breath had to be going right… yeah there.
She’d worried about that side of things for a long, long time. About Tara’s relationship with the vampire that they both remembered. Willow remembered it but she didn’t understand it all. It had taken her a long time to figure out why Tara had done what she did – why she had saved her from the vampire that had been her existence. When Tara had loved her.
And then, once she’d figured that out, she had to figure out something that was much harder. She still was figuring it out in fact. Her feelings for Tara. As the vampire she could recall lust, desire, possessiveness and something else that was intangible and unnameable. Now that she was human… she knew that those feelings had no place in her heart. Well… okay that wasn't quite true… just not as she remembered those feelings. They remained, but they were changed. And there was… there was something else. Growing inside her. The glimmer was how she thought of it – because it was small but it was bright. It was growing… it was far more than a glimmer now. It was a light that was starting to guide her. Sometimes she felt it was hovering in front of her and showing her the way.
Tara moved again and once again her breast emerged from the robe. Willow was oh sooo very pleased right now that Tara had got past the need to cover herself immediately. She would do… in a few minutes… or when she noticed Willow looking for too long – but there was no instant, nervous, reaction. Tara was accepting that new closeness.
And Willow liked that. She liked it for reasons that she didn’t really know or understand.
Not that she was going to push that closeness into the sort of intimacy where she could take the tip of that breast into her mouth and suck it until Tara gave her something else to suck on. That was never going to happen. The vampire would have done that. Willow was happy just to look.
To look and to smell… she inhaled and caught Tara’s scent. She was so close…. So close. And Tara smelled so good, even when she had been all wet…
This would do.
A little voice in her head just had to chime up, ‘For now.’
Tara looked down again and she smiled, seeing Willow looking at her. “Not enjoying the film?” she asked.
“I was just thinking,” Willow replied, shyly. And she had been. And she was shy because what she had been thinking was entirely too far for today. They were going slow and Willow hoped that she knew where they might both choose to go, but that wasn’t for today… But maybe they could be honest about it now.
“What about?” Tara asked.
“Er . . . Life, the Universe, why horses are so big and why Twinkies are nearly indestructible. You know, just things.” Couldn’t she be honest about it?
“Good thoughts then?” Tara suggested.
“Yes.” Willow meant it with all her heart. She just wished she had the courage to say something. Maybe that was all that they needed? To talk about where they were? Was that all it would take to decide where they could go?
Tara didn’t turn back to the movie, she just looked at Willow as if waiting for her to reveal what was on her mind. As if she knew that it might be something that was important. It seemed important to Willow… but she didn’t know if she was just caught up in the mood and in the… oh, in Tara’s very close physical presence.
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Tara was so proud of how far Willow had come. At first Willow had been totally dependant on her for simple living. She had been as helpless as a baby. She’d returned to herself, but with no self-confidence, no direction and no desire other than to hide from the horror of the things she had seen and done in her other life. The mark of that was still upon her, in her eyes and in the way she’d suddenly go quiet for very little reason. Just as Tara knew that she did too. Willow had been like a broken doll. But they had fixed each other. They had become such good friends. Tara couldn’t ask for anything more. And… this new closeness, she was liking that a lot. But that was going to be full the extent of it. Surely.
“Come on. I know that look. You’ve got something on your mind. Wanna share with me?” Tara made the question light, but knew that the answer might be as deep as the ocean if Willow started to talk about where they were. This wasn't the time. It should be talked about at another time, when they were not so close and involved with the... naked flesh thing. Which she was so not going to cover up right now. They could talk when she couldn’t smell Willow’s hair and feel her body heat. Willow had a habit of letting things build up inside until they all came tumbling out and Tara suspected that there was something there that was likely to tumble soon. But she wasn’t prepared for what came next.
“I want …..” Willow stopped as if she couldn’t continue but gave Tara a half embarrassed, half coy look. And she glanced at that naked breast.
Tara just looked at her, wanting to appear totally oblivious to the signals that Willow was trying to send out. She put a puzzled expression on her face as the pause lengthened into a silence, broken only when Willow leaped up from her lap with embarrassment. Tara pulled the robe around herself. It seemed the right thing to do then if not before.
“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean . . . I mean I did, but not if you don’t.” Willow’s face was almost as red as her hair as she fled from the living room into the safety of her bedroom. The bedroom that they shared.
Tara wondered first, insanely, if she was supposed to not follow her there tonight – but it was when they were upset that they needed to hold each other the most.
“You did it this time, didn’t you.” Faith’s voice echoed in her thoughts. She knew how fragile Willow sometimes was, and how a mere look could upset her – especially when there was tumbling involved. But still, it seemed to be an over-reaction on her friend’s part. What was it she’d wanted exactly? It was something that Willow had really wanted – or that she thought she did… and it was the thinking that was the problem to Tara. Thinking was fine – but minds could change. That was why she held back – but… there hadn’t even been a made up mind before.
‘Willow-babble’ as she thought of it was just a defence mechanism. It was endearing and often frustrating, because she hated probing at her friend to get to the bottom of what she really meant. Willow could be painfully shy. Tara could relate to that – she thought that Willow assumed the same of her.
“Don’t just sit there like a shag on a rock. Go after her.” She switched the video off and went to see what she could do to make things right. It didn’t take many words at all.
There was no talking, just holding and when they got up the next day what Willow had wanted hadn’t been mentioned. They just knew that there was a want… and that both of them felt it.
That didn’t make it necessarily right though.
Outside the rain still thudded against the house.
*******************
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If I want a little pussy, I got my own to play with.
Chance in
Chance.------------------------
by Katharyn » Sun Sep 29, 2002 12:51 am 
Part 86! 
, peeking Willow, and etc., conveys this new closeness/comfortableness that has developed between the two (ie truly crossing a new "threshold"). With this in mind, they have gone from "fixing"/healing each other, to the stage where they are "best friends" (ie Tara knowing they will be in each others lives, which is more than she could of hoped for with in the beginning thinking Willow would just vanish from her life once she healed), and now the thought, ("They just new that there was a want... and both of them felt it."), conveys that W&T are at the point where they can no longer be "stuck" (ie not moving forward in fear of Willow hurting Tara, and Tara not wanting to burden Willow), but rather explore their new closeness (and see what develops from it). Can't wait for the next part!
, I swear… Just... over enthusiastic, I guess? I’ll shut up now…
