I said I'm gonna post my replies to the individual fbs, but I'm so sleepy now (it's already 130 a.m. here
), and I'm not done with it yet (I'll post it tomorrow). So, I'm giving you instead the update!
I know that some of you have been waiting so long for this. We apologize for the delay, but betaing 18 pages (it turned out 18, after the final revisions), is not that easy. I think this chapter have been the most difficult one to beta. So, I hope you'll like it, and that it makes up for the long delay
Thanks again to all your wonderful fbs, it surely meant so much to me
Thanks Trom DeGrey for the great help, patience, understanding, and for making sure that I bring the best in my fic. And Rain for the beta help too.
Chapter 13 [center]JEALOUS HEARTS[/center]
***MONDAY EVENING***
The chill autumn air flowed through the open window of her bedroom. Darkness had sprawled into the room and the house began to fall into a hush, with only the squeaking sound of her bed breaking the silence with each restless movement that she made. “
It’s been one hell of a day”, Tara thought, recalling what had happened after dinner with Wesley. Tara went straight home, refusing Wesley’s offer to take her back to the house. ”
I’ve had enough”, she thought. If Wesley had been anymore persistent, she would have exploded. But Tara did not want that to happen. She had always had the patience of a seasoned hunter waiting to take his shot at his chosen prey. She would do everything possible to keep her cool intact. She had escaped Wesley, but things were not getting any better. She was now faced with the dilemma of going to the Rosenberg’s with Wesley, and seeing Willow.
“What would Willow think when she saw us together?" Tara worried. “
Why am I tormenting myself? As if I need to explain to her that I don’t have a boyfriend!”
***********************************
***TUESDAY MORNING***
That morning when Buffy woke up, she decided that there were things that needed to be done, seeing that she had accepted Faith and knew what she really wanted…
“Mom, can I talk to you?” Buffy asked, as she walked through the hallway of the second floor of their house and saw her mom just coming out of the bathroom.
“Oh sweetie, I’m in a hurry right now,” Joyce replied, brushing her hair as she walked towards the master bedroom. “Can we do this tonight?” she told Buffy before crossing the threshold of her room.
A bit disappointed, Buffy said, “Umm… sure.”
“Thanks sweetie,” Joyce returned and proceeded inside the room.
***********************************
When Willow woke up, she was excited and confident that this was going to be a great day. She had been feeling somewhat blue when Buffy had not kept in touch with her since the incident at the café. But late last night, she had received a text message from Buffy simply telling her that they needed to talk after school today.
Smiling and feeling cheerful, Willow walked through the school corridor and waited anxiously to see her best friend. She had worn the tattered pair of jeans and blue tee that had long been hanging in her closet. It was the outfit that Buffy had picked for her their first day of school their freshman year. Willow had always noticed that whenever she was wearing this blue cotton tee, Buffy seemed to always compliment how it looked good on her. Her reminiscing was cut short when she arrived at the classroom and discovered that Buffy was not there.
“
Well I always arrive ahead of her,” Willow thought, not wanting to worry that Buffy might have bailed on her. She walked towards her seat.
Two minutes before the bell rang, Willow saw her flustered friend enter the classroom hurriedly.
“Hey. What happened?” Willow asked, as Buffy dropped into the seat near her.
“I ran. I…I was still in the restroom… and I…” Buffy tried to tell as she gasped for air in between words.
“You what?” Willow murmured impatiently as she saw Ms. Calendar enter the room.
“Tell you later,” Buffy declared and grinned at Willow. Her eyes suddenly darted to the girl that entered the classroom followed by the teacher. Buffy’s eyes were mesmerized and followed the girl until she got to her seat on the other end of the row.
Curious, Willow asked, “What are you doin’?”
Buffy shrugged and gave Willow a perplexed look. “Huh?” Her brows furrowed in confusion. But before she could ask Willow…
“Miss Summers! Care to explain to us how we arrived at this?”
Buffy heard Ms. Calendar, after the teacher finished writing the problem on the whiteboard. She scratched her head, not having the slightest idea how to solve the equation on the board. “I… I…” She then gave the teacher a sheepish grin, and before she could tell Ms. Calendar that she did not know the answer, Willow raised her hand to get the teacher’s attention, and to save her best friend from an embarrassing situation.
“Yes, Miss Rosenberg!”
*************************************************
After their class ended, Willow and Buffy went straight to the school’s cafeteria. Willow was relieved that the place was almost deserted. Willow was about to sit on the cafeteria chair to listen to what Buffy would have to tell her when she felt something vibrating in her right jeans pocket. She excused herself and answered her cell phone.
After a few minutes she returned to the table where Buffy was, and gave her a disappointed look.
“Buff, that’s my mom,” Willow said. “She wants me to meet her at the grocery store. Now.”
When Buffy heard that, she decided that it would be better to postpone the conversation. “Oh. But that’s cool… I mean… your mom’s way more important than me,” she said, feeling that she would need a lot of time to tell Willow what she really wanted, and this was not the right time.
“I’m sorry,” Willow apologized. Seeing a slight look of disappointment on her best friend’s face, Willow took Buffy’s right hand and held it comfortingly. “Whatever you wanted to say now, I hope it can wait.”
Feeling a bit guilty, Buffy gently pulled her hand from Willow’s warm comforting touch. “Of course it can wait,” she returned sheepishly. “Go! You don’t wanna keep your mom waiting. We’ll have plenty of time to talk tomorrow.”
Willow then smiled at her best friend’s understanding reassurance. “Thanks! See you tomorrow.”
“Yup, see you.”
Willow held Buffy’s gaze until she stepped out of the cafeteria. She felt that she was about to receive the anticipated “yes” from Buffy. She was confident when she left school.
******************************************
“Mom, don’t you think that’s too much for both of us?” Willow questioned, after she saw her mother put the 15lb. turkey in the cart that she was pushing. She continued to trail behind her through the aisle of the grocery store.
Sheila shot a perplexed look at her daughter and asked, “Didn’t I tell you?”
Completely clueless, Willow asked, “What?”
“I’ve invited Tara and her boyfriend!” Sheila declared, standing in front of Willow, with the cart separating them. She then turned around and walked further to the next aisle.
“You did what?!” Willow shouted as she ran after her mom with the cart. “What did you say?!” Willow demanded as she cornered her mom in the aisle of vegetables. Her eyebrows were furrowed and her lips were partly open due to the fact the sudden surprise hadn’t worn off and pure turmoil was just beginning to mar her face as she waited anxiously for her mother to confirm whether she had heard her right or not.
“Tara and her boyfriend are coming for Thanksgiving dinner,” Sheila replied, as she tossed a bag of carrots in the cart.
As soon as that registered in her mind, Willow felt as if she was about to shatter into million pieces. For a while, she had tried to deny to herself that the man that she had seen at Tara’s house might have been her boyfriend. She hadn’t dwelt on that idea, hoping that she was wrong.
“Is something wrong?” Sheila asked, seeing that Willow seemed to be dazed for a moment.
“N-nothing,” Willow mumbled as she tried to take her mind off what had just happened. When she saw her mom walk ahead, she followed and pushed the cart absent-mindedly.
“So, she does. She does have a fucking boyfriend! I should have known! I should have known!!!”
“You could have just invited Tara,” Willow grumbled while trailing behind her mother in the dairy section.
“And what exactly do you mean by that?” Sheila asked after closing the door of the milk section, surprised at Willow’s attitude.
“Well, you just don’t go inviting people you don’t know!” Willow commented, avoiding her mother’s eyes. Her temper seemed to be starting to make itself known now at the thought of the coming Thanksgiving dinner.
“Actually, I have met him. I saw he and Tara at Alfredo’s the other night,” Sheila replied while putting two cartons of milk in the cart. “His name was Wesley, and he seems like a nice man.”
“Nice?!” Willow snorted. She was growing angrier. “How can you tell he’s nice when you just spent three minutes with him!?” she retorted and rolled her eyes in disagreement. Her mother didn’t seem as if she actually heard what Willow said and proceeded taking canned tomato sauce from the shelves.
By this time, the cart that Willow was pushing was becoming heavier, and she noticed that it was nearly full. Willow absently followed her mother to the counter, aggravated that she had to push all this so that Tara’s boyfriend could have a delicious meal on Thursday.
Too distracted at the thought of Tara and her boyfriend coming over to their house, Willow did not notice that she had lost track of her mother, and unconsciously unloaded the cart onto the counter.
“That’ll be one hundred seventy three dollars.” Willow was yanked from her sulking by the cashier’s voice.
Confused, she said “Huh?!” And her eyes suddenly darted to the items on the counter. She was surprised to see the cart unloaded and everything checked out. “Oh!” she uttered in embarrassing realization, and grinned at the frowning cashier. “Umm… could you excuse me for a sec, while I’ll get my mom?” she said, and escaped the piercing eyes of the customers that were behind her in the line.
She searched frantically through the store and after checking four aisles, she found her mom heading towards the counter.
“Mom!” Willow called.
“Where have you been?” Sheila asked her panting daughter. “And where’s our cart?!”
“I… I’ve already checked out!” Willow blurted, gasping.
“You what?!” Sheila asked.
“I thought you were heading towards the counter.”
“But I didn’t!” Sheila corrected. “Didn’t you see me talking to Joyce?”
“No!” Willow replied.
“Willow Rosenberg, what have you done this time?!” Sheila glared at Willow.
Willow gave her mother a sheepish look and grinned. “I think we better head back to the counter before they kick me out of this grocery,” she told her mother and led the way to the counter.
***********************
Seeing that her mother had arrived, Buffy ran to Joyce and took the grocery bags that Joyce was carrying in her arms. “I’ll take those,” Buffy said, discerning that her mother was exhausted and went ahead to the kitchen.
“Thanks Buffy,” Joyce returned, relieved from the heavy bags and proceeded to the kitchen too.
“Umm… Mom,” Buffy started after unloading the last item from the grocery bag and looked in confusion at the items that were lying on the table.
“Yes, sweetie,” Joyce answered while finishing her water. She went to the kitchen counter where Buffy was standing, looking concerned.
“I think you forgot the turkey,” Buffy said, checking the empty brown bag again.
“No, I didn’t,” Joyce replied.
“We’re not celebrating Thanksgiving?!” Buffy exclaimed.
“We’re not because…” Joyce tried to explain, but before she could finish the sentence, her cell phone rang and she answered it upon recognizing the number. “Yes? What?! All right I’ll be there, just give me an hour.”
“Please don’t tell me that you’re going back to the museum?” Buffy whined, distress written all over her face. She was growing frustrated.
“I’m sorry honey, but I have to.”
******************************************
***WEDNESDAY***
When Buffy went into their dining room she was saddened to see one plate with ham and eggs and a glass of orange juice on the dining table. Her eyes quickly searched for that little yellow paper that her mother always used when leaving a note for her and found it on the fridge. “
Breakfast on the table. I have to receive the shipment that’s coming today.”
“Not again!” Buffy whined and crumpled the paper in her hand before throwing it in the trash bin.
She went upstairs, abandoning the breakfast, and laid on her bed again. She was growing more exasperated by not being able to talk to her mother. When Joyce had arrived home yesterday, Buffy thought that she would have the chance at dinner to tell her mother about she and Faith.
And today, expecting that her mother wouldn’t be working since it was the day before Thanksgiving, Buffy was immensely disenchanted to find that her mother was out at work again. Suddenly, her moping session was halted when her cell phone rang. Recognizing the ring tone that she had chosen for Faith’s number, the grumpy expression on Buffy’s face disappeared.
“Hey. Didn’t you just call twenty minutes ago?” Buffy said, grinning. “Now? But I’m seeing Willow today,” she tried to explain, but she was eventually convinced. “Alright, I’ll be there. Give me half an hour.”
******************************************
***Thursday dinner.***
Willow answered the door and was taken aback when she saw Tara with a man. Her suspicions proved right. He was indeed the one that she remembered that day she went to Tara’s a long while ago. Before her anger could go to the next level, Willow’s eyes caught the beauty in front of her. Though covered with a black velvet coat, Tara’s beauty still radiated and captured Willow.
*************************************
As the door opened a different Willow unfolded before Tara’s eyes. She was mesmerized at how gorgeous Willow was in a long-sleeved button-down baby blue dress shirt, and a pair of khaki slacks. She gazed at Willow. “
Oh. My. God.” Tara thought, and gaped helplessly at her. Her nose picked up the scent of Willow’s perfume.
“She smells so good,” she thought. She picked out honeysuckle, sandalwood and balsam; a scent that one couldn’t usually find in a woman’s perfume.
“Damn! I wanna kiss her!” Tara realized with a start, but she suppressed this sudden urge as she saw Willow’s puzzled expression.
Her eyes made a quick scan starting from Willow’s torso. The first button of the dress shirt was open and revealed some of Willow’s freckled skin. Tara found Willow devastatingly attractive in it. The dress shirt’s sleeves were rolled up; and a simple yet elegant silver chain bracelet was knitted around Willow’s right wrist, making her look even more handsome in her attire.
Tara’s little pleasure of ogling was suddenly interrupted when her ears caught the sound of a cough behind her. Tara suddenly remembered Wesley standing behind her. Blushing in embarrassment, she composed herself and said to Willow, “Happy Thanksgiving!” and handed Willow a bottle of wine that she was carrying.
**********************************
Showing a calm expression, Willow forced a smile and replied, “Happy Thanksgiving too!” She then stepped aside and let her guests come in.
Tara and Wesley hadn’t taken off their coats yet when Willow heard the excited and cheerful voice of her mother and saw her emerge from the kitchen.
“Oh! Tara, Wesley! It’s good to see you!” Sheila Rosenberg exclaimed.
Willow saw the man walk towards her mother and kiss her hand.
“You looked lovely tonight Mrs. Rosenberg!” Wesley complimented.
“Aww, Wesley,” Sheila uttered, blushing at the compliment. “You look handsome yourself tonight!”
Willow smirked, not believing that she was hearing this conversation between her mother and this stranger. She then shook her head and turned in Tara’s direction, and saw that Tara was starting to take off her coat. Willow’s hand caught the coat from behind. “I’ll take that.” Willow said. Tara’s hair was pulled up in a relaxed sexy twist. And as Willow helped her remove her coat, she was able to finally take in what Tara was wearing. Willow swallowed at the lump in her throat as Tara turned around revealing her outfit of tan linen pants topped with a scoop neck coral camisole and a sheer ivory cardigan. A tantalizing expanse of Tara’s upper chest beckoned Willow’s eyes and she suppressed a shiver.
“Thanks.”
Willow heard Tara’s voice but was still left dumbfounded and continued to stare.
Tara shifted uncomfortably.
“Why is she staring? Do I look okay? Does she like my outfit? What am I thinking?!”
“Staring! You’re staring!” Willow’s mind screeched. She shook herself and looked down at her shoes. “You, um, look nice,” she mumbled.
Tara felt herself blush, but smiled her lopsided grin. “Thanks, Willow,” she murmured. “You look really nice too.” Without any thought, Tara stepped closer. “You, um, really smell nice too.”
Willow looked up and smiled. “Thanks,” she whispered and felt a blush of her own start to creep across her cheeks. “
She is just so beautiful.”
“I want to touch her,” Tara thought, but stuffed her hands into her pockets. “
Tara, control yourself!” she admonished internally.
“Tara?” Wesley called.
“Y-yeah?” Tara answered.
“Willow!”
Willow heard her mother’s voice and turned around. “Come here!” her mother beckoned. Willow grimaced in dismay as she was broken from her Tara-induced haze and saw the man that she hated standing beside her mother. “
I hate this!” she thought as she heeded her mother’s call.
“Wesley, this is my daughter, Willow,” Sheila declared cheerfully.
Willow plastered on a fake smile and eventually took Wesley’s offered hand “Hey,” she said dryly. Not being able to withstand the man’s presence anymore, she said, “Excuse me, I need to kill the turkey,” and walked to the kitchen.
Willow tried to compose herself as best as she could. Seeing Tara with this man was making her blood boil.
“What the hell was my mom thinking?!” she railed internally, thinking that her mom could have just invited Tara alone. But she needed to cloak her dislike for this man and act normal in front of them since this was the first time that her mother hosted a Thanksgiving dinner for friends.
***************************************
Since they had arrived, Tara’s thoughts kept wandering. Now, sitting on the sofa waiting for Sheila to serve dinner, her thoughts drifted down memory lane.
Tara fondly recalled the first time she arrived with Matt at this house and the first time she and Willow were introduced. She couldn’t help but smile as she clearly recalled Willow’s flabbergasted expression the first time they came face to face.
She smiled as she relished the good old days. “
She was so adorable,” Tara said to herself and sighed at the thought of the eight year-old Willow-y cuteness, ignoring the presence of Wesley beside her.
Her eyes darted to the bay window of the house, and the smile fled her face when the scenes from the time she confronted Willow about the little girl’s love proposal came pouring into her mind. Tara suddenly felt sorry after recalling how hurt Willow was when she told her that she couldn’t be her girlfriend. But how could she ever fall in love with an eight year-old girl? Tara never expected that her feelings could make such an abrupt turn after nine years. And now, as Tara saw Willow emerging from the kitchen with the bottle of wine and two glasses coming in their direction, her heart thudded with desire and attraction. “
Does she still want me? Tara began to wonder, as her eyes followed Willow’s figure and gazed helplessly at the silent Willow. Willow’s presence was making her wish that she had the courage to tell her the truth. “
Oohhh, tell me you haven’t forgotten about me,” Tara worriedly thought, hoping Willow’s love for her was still there. Her feelings intensified more when Willow came closer to the table and started pouring their wine, and her nose caught Willow’s alluring smell. “
Say you still love me!” Tara shouted desperately in her mind. She continued to stare at Willow as she poured the red wine in the last glass. Tara sat back and took a deep breath. “
I’m losing it,” she thought. “
What am I thinking?”
Tara noticed that Willow had not talked much; opposite from the talkative Willow that she knew and it was making her uncomfortable. After pouring the drinks, Tara’s mental drama was distracted when she heard Wesley thank Willow for the wine and Tara saw her give him a cold smile. The look caught Tara’s attention and she allowed herself a little bit of hope. “
That might just have been jealousy.” She was about to say ‘thanks’ but the sound of the doorbell ringing kept Tara from starting a conversation.
Willow put down the bottle and went to answer the door. Seconds later, a small young woman and a middle-aged woman with curly blonde hair came in. Tara’s eyes widened and she felt the unmistakable flair of jealousy as she saw Willow stoop a bit and plant a kiss on the pretty girl’s cheek. She recognized the girl right away, and got upset as she remembered that it was the girl she had seen Willow hugging. She never expected that there would be any other guests besides her and Wesley, and it was not just some other guests but the girl that made her insecure and jealous! Tara tried to compose herself, but she couldn’t help herself and drained all the liquid from her glass.
“Will you go easy on that?”
Tara heard Wesley’s voice and almost forgot that she had a companion due to this sudden rush of jealousy in her body. Instead of listening to what Wesley had said she took the bottle of wine and poured some more into her glass. She was about to take another drink, when Wesley’s hand halted her and took the glass from her.
“What’s happening to you?” Wesley said.
But before she could say anything, Willow and the two newly arrived guests approached them and Wesley stood up to greet them.
“Joyce, Buffy this is Tara and Wesley,” Willow said.
“Of course! Buffy, the best friend!” Tara realized, and extended her hand to the older woman first. “Nice to meet you,” Tara said and smiled. But as she was about to shake the young woman’s hand, Tara saw her looking at her in an awkward manner. “
I don’t like that stare,” Tara thought, feeling self-conscious. She shook hands with her quickly and said “Hi.” But it was all she could mutter and she took a seat as the rest took theirs.
***************************************
Sitting in the living room with Buffy was uncomfortable as Tara often caught Buffy stealing glances at her. She was thankful that it was not too long before Sheila came in the living room to ask them to go the dining room. When they came to the table, Tara hoped and wished that she could sit next to Willow. But she was disappointed when Sheila, standing at the other end of the table, waved to her and motioned for her and Wesley to sit on the left side of the large rectangular mahogany dining table. Tara noticed that there were only two plates set on that side. She read the two place cards on the table and saw that Wesley was placed near Sheila and she was next to Wesley. Wesley pulled the chair out for her and she sat down, watching where the others sat. Her eyes followed Willow and she turned green with envy when she saw Willow pull the chair out for Buffy. Tara was disappointed to find Buffy was sitting opposite her and that Willow was at Buffy’s right. “
Of course she’s sitting next to her. Stop being insane!”
As soon as they were all seated at their respective places, Tara’s eyes remained on Willow, who seemed to be satisfied sitting beside the pretty Buffy. The Rosenbergs had a fairly big dining table and a silver antique candelabra with tall lighted candles was placed in the middle. This was the one comfort Tara found in the table seating, since it obscured her and Buffy from clearly seeing each other. She looked to her right and was glad in a way that Wesley was seated next to Sheila, who was sitting at the head of the table. She did not have to talk much with Sheila and Joyce, she thought and could instead concentrate on Willow and working out her feelings.
Grace was said and then the food began to be passed around the table. After everyone had been served, Tara snuck a peak at Willow before she started on her meal. She was surprised to find a pair of green orbs already gazing at her. How her heart melted as those green eyes made a sudden unexpected contact with her. “
When did she become so gorgeous? What am I gonna do?” she thought. Tara broke off the tender moment. Willow’s brief gaze sent Tara into bewilderment and she found herself warm and reddening. However, Tara was disappointed when Willow was distracted by Buffy.
“What’s wrong?” Wesley mumbled.
“What do you mean?” Tara asked in a hushed tone, her brow furrowed.
“You don’t look happy,” Wesley told her.
But before she could reply, Sheila’s voice got their attention.
“I want to thank you all for celebrating Thanksgiving with us,” Sheila said. “And it’s nice that you could join us Wesley.”
“It’s a pleasure and thank you for inviting me to your fabulous house.” Wesley returned.
“So Tara, how did you and Wesley meet?” Sheila asked.
Tara felt awkward upon hearing the unwanted question. She put down her fork and knife on the plate. It suddenly felt like the food in her mouth was hard to swallow. She wiped her mouth with the napkin, and was trying to decide how to answer the question. She did not feel like reminiscing and telling this kind of story and was confused on how to begin. But before she could utter a word, Wesley was there to fill them in.
“We actually met at a restaurant,” Wesley began, as all eyes set on him.
”
He always likes the attention,” Tara thought.
“Tara was with her friend, eating dinner and when I saw her, I knew that I was in love with her,” Wesley said proudly.
Tara became anxious when she heard the last sentence and was uncomfortable in her seat. She looked at Willow, wanting to see her reaction to Wesley’s remark, but Willow just continued eating her food quietly.
“That’s so romantic!” Joyce exclaimed.
Tara ground her jaw in agitation as these unwelcome remarks transpired over dinner. Just as she was about to disagree with Joyce’s comment, Tara was suddenly distracted by Willow and Buffy. She was consumed with jealousy as she watched Willow whispering in Buffy’s ear while the blonde girl giggled. Tara became self-conscious about her big ears as she glanced enviously at Buffy’s dainty little ears. She hated to admit it, but Buffy looked even prettier up close. She remembered that day when she saw Willow’s face deeply snuggled into Buffy’s neck, and how devastated she had felt by that scene. It was almost replaying now and Tara was surprised to realize that she detested anyone making such cozy contact with Willow! “
I don’t know what I’m going to do, but I can’t stand this. I can’t deny this. I don’t want Wesley. I want Willow.” She swallowed at the fear that bubbled up in her chest over her admission.
“And may I say, you two make a perfect couple,” Sheila added, after cutting more turkey.
Tara was about to oppose, “Oh, we’re...” But the sound of telephone ringing beat her to it.
“I’ll get it!” Willow said, and stood up to get the phone.
“Well, thank you.” Wesley replied, satisfied. “That’s absolutely wonderful to hear.”
As Tara was about to disagree with Wesley’s comment, Willow came in with the phone.
“Mom, it’s Matt!” Willow said excitedly.
“Oh! Give it to Tara first,” Sheila suggested with excitement. “He’ll be excited to know you’re here,” Sheila told Tara.
Tara accepted the phone from Willow and talked to her friend first, before handing it to Sheila. While Sheila continued talking to Matt on the phone, the table topic turned to politics, and Wesley and Joyce exchanged their opinions on the economy.
Tara felt envious as she saw Buffy sitting happily with Willow. And she noticed that Willow seemed to be having a nice time chatting with the lovely girl. How could she have agreed to come over at the Rosenberg’s house? Tara had not expected that there would be other people aside from them. But as soon as she caught sight of Buffy, she suddenly felt threatened and thought that coming over was a mistake.
And now sitting at the table and sharing this meal with Willow’s family and friends seemed like torture to her. Tara gazed at the preoccupied Willow and thoughts of her high school days came pouring out. She relived the moments when Willow would hang around with she and Matt, and she didn’t notice Willow’s interest in her. ”
She’s just a little girl with a crush,” Tara always thought, but how foolish she felt now. “
Could you possibly still have that crush now?” Tara continued to watch Willow, and stealthily observe the two across from her.
”
Does she still find me attractive?” Tara suddenly began to fret, as her eyes found Buffy pretty and fresh. She then tore her sight away and shook her head a bit. “
Get hold of yourself! You’ve got to work this out. Be rational!” But her heart couldn’t seem to get enough of Willow and she found herself gazing at her again, but Willow seemed to be engrossed in talking with Buffy.
Tara bristled when she saw Buffy giggling again. Willow leaned closer and mumbled something that caused Buffy to blush. Willow seemed to be flirting with Buffy, and Tara hated it immensely! She squirmed in her seat, and started to feel uncomfortable as this flirty whispering transpired between Willow and Buffy. Tara’s hands reached for the white table napkin that was lying on her lap and unconsciously wringed it.
Growing more upset, Tara drank all the red wine in her glass, before tearing her sight away from Buffy and Willow and giving her attention to Wesley, Joyce and Sheila’s conversation. She pretended to listen intently, and yet her thoughts and her senses were focused on the two on the other side of the table.
*****************************************
A while later, Buffy joined Willow washing up the dishes, as the others gathered in the living room.
“So, she’s back.” Buffy smirked, standing beside Willow as they began rinsing the plates and added, “And with a boyfriend.”
Pretending that she did not get it, Willow said, “I’m sorry, what were you saying?” She stepped back and looked around the kitchen, as if looking for something that would make her leave Buffy’s side.
“Why didn’t you tell me that Tara’s here?” Buffy continued, while brushing the remaining food off a plate.
Willow heard the demand in Buffy’s voice. “Well, does it matter to you?” Willow asked, and walked to the kitchen counter.
“Of course it matters to me,” Buffy replied her back to Willow. “She has been the cause of your suffering.”
“Let’s not talk about that,” Willow returned. She was beginning to be annoyed, and walked away from Buffy and went to the fridge to put the leftovers away.
“I’m sorry,” Buffy apologized. “Will?” she said and turned around to face Willow. “We need to talk,” she proclaimed and gave a deep sigh.
Thankful to be clear of the touchy topic of Tara, Willow walked over to her best friend and stood beside her by the sink. “I’m listening.” Willow’s voice became tender, and she flashed a smile at her best friend. She had almost forgotten that they had this thing to resolve, and that Buffy might be feeling jealous now because of Tara. Seeing Tara together with Wesley had made this evening intolerable, and Willow had tried to mask the jealousy and anger that were struggling to steam out of her. She was glad that Buffy was beside her to lessen the pain and to distract her.
“You’re my best friend,” Buffy started, moving closer to Willow. “And you know how much I love you.”
Willow nodded and grinned. “Uh huh,” she mumbled, her eyes never leaving Buffy.
Growing anxious, Buffy tried to compose herself. “And you’re probably wondering why I didn’t give you an answer when you told me that you…” Buffy suddenly wasn’t sure what to say, and began to pace around the kitchen. “The thing is… I’m in love with a girl and…” A great pause suddenly occurred as Buffy saw Willow’s look of anticipation. She felt guilty, but she needed to tell this so that everything would be clear between them and they could all move on. “And her name is Faith,” Buffy murmured.
“What?!” Willow blurted out, completely shocked. She was being rejected again. What was even worse was that Buffy was the one rejecting her; her very best friend, whom she thought was deeply in love with her. “How could this happen?!”
“I fell in love with her,” Buffy mumbled.
“That’s bullshit! How could you fall in love with someone you barely know?!” Willow exploded. “I thought
I was the one you
loved! I thought
I was the one you
wanted! How could you do this to me?!”
“You barely know her,” Buffy pointed out. “Look, I haven’t done anything wrong!” she defended.
Willow turned around and faced Buffy, her eyes smoldering in rage. “Oh yeah, then what do you call this?!” Willow retorted. “Why were you hiding this from me?!”
“As far as I know, I don’t owe you any apology, coz it’s you who’s hiding something from me!” Buffy snarled back.
“What?! I’m not hiding anything from you!” Willow snapped.
“Oh, yes you are! You’re hiding your pain!” Buffy retaliated. “Don’t tell me you weren’t hurt when you found out that Tara had a boyfriend!”
This time Willow was silenced by Buffy’s remark. The truth pierced her heart.
“I can see in your eyes that you’re still in love with her,” Buffy declared.
“N-no I’m not,” Willow denied, and avoided Buffy’s eyes.
“Don’t lie to me Willow, I know you,” Buffy claimed and stood in front of Willow. “You’ve been in love with Tara since the day you met her, and you’d never stopped loving her.” Buffy brought her hand to Willow’s face and held her best friend’s jaw. “Look at me!” Buffy ordered. “Tell me I’m wrong,” she said firmly, still holding Willow’s jaw. “Tell me!” Buffy demanded, but was just answered by a conceding silence. After extracting the truth, she released Willow and was nearly in tears. “And to think, you told me that you wanted me…” Buffy’s eyes glistened with unshed tears.
Willow’s brow contorted in worry and guilt as she saw the look of hurt in her best friend’s eyes. “Buffy,” Willow uttered softly, and tried to reach for Buffy’s face, but her best friend avoided her touch. “What do you want me to say?”
“The truth Will.”
Feeling the pressure of not wanting to lie anymore, Willow blurted out, “All right! I’m still in love with Tara and I’ve never stopped loving her! I’ve never stopped wanting her! Being in that room, pretending not to be hurt and seeing her with her boyfriend was the hardest and most painful thing that I’ve ever experienced in my life, and I’m so
fucking angry! Coz I’m not a f
ucking man and I can’t give Tara what she
fucking wants!” She took a deep breath. “Satisfied?!” Willow snapped, but then her brows contorted in confusion when Buffy’s stare lifted from her and turned to the direction of the kitchen’s door.
TBC
Grrrr 
OK, I don't hate you but grrrrr....!!!
Also if she is going to be in a relationship with someone, Buffy or a new invented character would always be preferable to her being with WIllow or Tara. 
... how can you do this to us!! Not only has he got himself invited along to Thanksgiving, but he's also her new business partner 
hehe..)
A slight description of a person that coulda been Faith, (which i assumed it was) was made earlier in the fic, and so making quite alot of peeps going "oooh... " when Faith actually came into the fic, so 
on that.
,
and 
? It seems that everytime that they are about to do anything or about to tell the other anything someone or something comes in to iterrupt them. You are going to tease us with this aren't you? 
Well, I can't wait 
more.
, she needs her Tara.
Update soon
, I just hope it's not Wesley.
This story is beautiful and heart wrenching. please write more. 
You're killing me here!!
