Have just spent the week chatting to random women on a dating/community website, feel really proud of meself! Last time I signed up for one of those things, I filled out all me details, smiled at a bunch of people, freaked out, then never logged on again! At least this time, I've actually struck up a few conversations!

Best part is, as I've been trying this site out I've been getting moral support from my (straight) best friend. Although have been out to her for 7 years, I never speak about my sexuality to her. Has been a bit of a test to start talking about trying to find a relationship again and discussing the various girs I've been chatting too. She's been really nice, sending me supportive facebook messages and giving advice about how to use these sites. (She's been on Match.com for years)

Still haven't come out to me new flatmates yet. something is scary me. tho am still proud of these little baby steps am taking!

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“The purpose of life, after all, is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experiences.” Eleanor Roosevelt

"It's a new dawn, its a new day, its a new life...for me...and I'm feeling good" Nina Simone

Just before coming home from uni for christmas i came out to a couple of my friends. there the first people iv told that i am gay, it feels such a relief to know that i have made the first step. Once the christmas holiday is over i plan to come out to afew more of my uni friends, not so sure about telling my friends from home and my family yet tho, i dont know how supportive they are going to be.

Well done Leanne, telling those first few people can be the scariest thing! Good luck when you tell your home friends and family-you never know, they might be more supportive than you think!

Have just spent the past couple weeks chatting on this dating site, have had 2 offers of coffee and got about email rallies going-yey me! Am completly terrified though about acutally meeting these women. Guess will just have to bite the bullet and give it a go feel ridiculously scared tho!

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“The purpose of life, after all, is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experiences.” Eleanor Roosevelt

"It's a new dawn, its a new day, its a new life...for me...and I'm feeling good" Nina Simone

congrats, guys.. first steps are the hardest. But once you find somebody, that can really help support you. keep your eye on the target: coming out is the biggest thing any LGBTTIQ person can do to change the situation regarding our rights.

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Check out Between Breaths if you like.

I came out to my best friend. We've been pretty much friends my entire life. She was soo happy for me! And wants to meet my girl! Next step is the parents.

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"There is never a pill strong enough to make me feel the way all your fingers could."

Haha woahnellie, that's just what i was about to say, and congratulations So yeah, I told her and apparently she has 'always known'. It was such a relief, I dont know why I was so worried. I'm not sure I'll be telling the parents any time soon though.

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If you're gonna get up, you might as well get up with me - Tegan and Sara

Saving Myself

Came out to my best friend on friday. He already heard some rumours, but never believed them, cuz he hoped I would fall for him... Hmm, didn't happen, but he is one of the nicest guys in the world. Love him to bits.
Well, it was awesome. After I told him, we talked about like all those things, that stood between us. All problems and misunderstandings between us are solved now. I'm so happy about it. Really missed him the last 6 months we didn't talk to each other. We're just sooo freaking stubborn, but it's all good now. YAY!

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You don't believe God, I don't believe in luck,
They don't believe in us, but I believe we're the enemy... ~ My Chemical Romance - Destroya

So I just found out that another player on my softball team is gay. It kind of bothered me how some people were acting like its a big deal. I just kept thinking that that could be me. But right now I am deep I'm the closet. She is a sophmore, I'm a senior in high school. I'm kind of jealous that she was confident enough to come out. I kind of feel like saying something to her or maybe tell her I'm gay too. I just feel like i'm hiding and I don't want her to feel like she's alone, cause she's definitely not. Thanks for listening, I just wanted to tell someone.

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Willow: We can come by between classes. Usually I use that time to copy over my class notes with a system of different colored pens. But it's been pointed out to me that that's, you know... insane.

Tara: I said quirky.

I say go for it tell her (unkless she's the kind person that would imediately out you to everyone, but I'm guessing she's not)
People come out the me in private all the time and from my experience that is a nice thing, if you're out yourself you've gone to the proces and being able to help someone else do that makes yopu feel great too. Also the having someone else who's not straight and won't judge you is nice

And good luck with the rest of your coming out. I guess it can be hard if theres many people who aren't very gay friendly, but if you are ok with yourself and you've got someone to talk to when things turn too mean it can work anyway

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Manchmal in der Nacht hab ich phantastische Träume. Aber wenn ish aufwach, quält mich die Angst.
Manchmal in der Nacht bin ich so hilflos und wünsch mir, es käm einer, der mich führt und beschützt.
(__/)
(O.o )
(> < ) This Is Bunny. Copy Bunny into your signature to help him on his way to world domination. (it must be bunnieeees!)

WillowandTara - I totally agree with Dorothy on this one. If you feel like it, come out to her. Maybe you'll both get some support and you could make a new friend.

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Menorah Tales | Working It Out | Random Bits

Thanks guys, I appreciate it. I give her a ride home sometimes since we live near eachother. Hopefully the next time, I'll be able to muster up enough courage

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Willow: We can come by between classes. Usually I use that time to copy over my class notes with a system of different colored pens. But it's been pointed out to me that that's, you know... insane.

Tara: I said quirky.

Good luck

_________________
"To days to come."
"All my love to long ago.

I hope, we'll have more happy ever after
I hope, we can all live more fearlessly...

~Jas

Feel so silly, still haven't come out to my flatmates yet. Is ridiculous, they must suspect, they never ask me about my relationships or ask why I'm not dating at the moment. I just want it all to be over with and it to be ok. the longer it goes on the harder it is.

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“The purpose of life, after all, is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experiences.” Eleanor Roosevelt

"It's a new dawn, its a new day, its a new life...for me...and I'm feeling good" Nina Simone

I will admit it, I'm a lurker. I've been creeping around here for months and have never posted one thing. Which is strange, because I always have a lot to say (as I'm sure this post will tell). But, you know, I guess this is a nice place to start.

I've been reading all of your stories, and it has given me inspiration to share my own coming out.

First, let me start off by saying that I'm 19. I have had two boyfriends in my life, and no girlfriends. I haven't even kissed a girl. But it's not that hard to know.

I first realized I was attracted to girls when I was 11. I wasn't obtuse, I knew what that meant. And so I knew what society's view on the matter was. For a long time, I thought myself to be this terrible atrocity because I listened to what the social order was saying. And they said the feelings I was having were wrong. So I thought, 'I must be wrong.' I decided it was something I could get through on my own. I refused to admit to myself, and I buried it deep down. Nobody needed to know these impure thoughts I was having, not my siblings, my parents, not my friends. I'll just pretend that I'm not that way, and everything will be fine. So I remarked about the guys at school and I 'swooned' over Leonardo DiCaprio when I saw Titanic. I 'hoped' a guy would ask me to the school dance, I 'wished' a guy would ask me to be his girlfriend. And when those things happened, I was oh-so-excited! I played my part, and I played it well. I congratulated myself on my trickery, I prided myself in the fact that I fooled everybody. Nobody suspected a thing.

And then I turned 16.

"Are you a lesbian?" Watching TV with my youngest oldest brother, that was not a question I was expecting. Why would he even ask that? What indication had I ever given for him to suspect it? "Pshh. No! Geez, Jon... I like boys." And we left it at that. At least, I did. For the next year, at random moments, in restaurants or school, the same question came up from him again and again. "Are you a lesbian?" And my answer always the same, "No."

Finally came the last time he asked for no reason. A couple days after my 17th birthday, "Are you a lesbian?" And before I could mumble my patented 'No', I heard the voice of my mother float out from the dining room. "So what if she is?" THAT would have been my cue. That would have been my cue to pull out my picketed sign that so cleary stated 'I'm gay!' and jump up and down pointing while simultaneously shouting, 'Ma! Ma! Look over here, look at the sign!' But all that came out was, "I'm not gay." My mother was basically saying she didn't care if I was... and I still couldn't tell them the truth... because I still hadn't told myself the truth.

I'm gay. That was the phrase I started repeating in my head over and over again until I was comfortable with hearing the thought. I got a pencil and some paper, and I wrote it down. I finally managed to say it out loud. And it got easier every single time. And then I looked in the mirror. I stood there for a good ten minutes before I looked myself in the eye and muttered those two words. And the world did not end. I didn't feel any different. I didn't look any different. And I finally realized it was because I wasn't any different. I was still the same old me.

Now came the hard part of coming out to others. And who better to come out to than my best friend, the one person who first noticed? My brother and I were in our bedroom one night. He was lying on his bed and I was on a mattress on the floor and we were talking, and the subject touched upon that of secrets. And I decided then was as good a time as any. So I turned and looked at him and said, "I have a secret." He looked at me, confused, and then smiled. "Are you a lesbian?" And I smiled back, but instead of saying 'no', I said 'yes.' And I felt SO relieved. All of my worries about him not understanding were dashed as he said, "Good for you. I'm glad you told me. And I'll be okay with it just as long as you don't go after my girlfriend."

It got easier after that and I came out to two other people, two people who were really good friends. And they were okay with it. (And they never suspected a thing).

And that leads to where I am now. I still have three friends to talk to, not sure what their reactions will be. I still have two brothers and two sisters to tell. And I have yet to come out to my parents. While I'm pretty certain they won't have a problem with it, especially my mother, it's still a little daunting to even think about. I mean, until it actually happens, you can't be too sure of how a person will react. But I have admitted it to a few others, and most importantly, I have admitted it to myself, and that's really all that matters at the moment.

And hey! I've kinda just told a whole bunch of strangers on the internet! That means something too, right?

Hey, BeckySue. Welcome to the Kitten! Congrats on finally delurking.

And congrats on coming out! Isn't it funny how so often other people have us figured out before we have ourselves figured out? Good for you that you figured yourself out! I know it wasn't easy.


It does! It definitely does! Just like the stories that you read here helped you in some ways, now your story can help someone else. So thanks for telling us your story.

I wish you the best in your future coming out adventures. (I'm 35 and, in my experience, coming out is something you're going to be doing for the rest of your life. It gets easier, I promise!)

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Thought I would make this link my first post back and share my story. I am what you would call a late bloomer. I dated guys all through HS and collage but they always turned into beer buddies with privliges, or just a place to scrach. Then I met the women I would spend my life with. Hidsight is a wonderful thing. It allows you to look back and go "duh!!!! were you blind or what?!" I was in my relasionship over 5 years before I had figured out what it was. That was 23 years ago. I never came out really everyone I know/knew just kinda already knew to include my familly, my mother said "yeah so", and my brother said "and tell me somthing new". I have always had a little guilt that it was so easy. However remeber what I said about hidsight? Looking back I can see all the confussion and pain, but then I thought it was religon not sexuality. I went to HS in the greater Salt Lake City area and went to collage in NE so it wasn't like I had lots of role models. The point of all of this is that everyones story is differant, and it is in those differances that we find comunity and greater understanding. Hats off to all of you who unlike me figured it out and were willing to go all the way to be yourself.

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"If you know your Bible,Shakespeare and can shoot craps, you have had a liberal education."
T. Bankhead

deleted

Congratulations! That's a big step. So happy for you
Coming out to people who accept it and are positive about it, is an amazing feeling

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“When you say, I am gay, you own it. No one can take it away from you.”
- Amber Benson

Natalie

coolish! Give my big congratulations and an imaginary giant gold medal to your mother for handling it like a champ

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Manchmal in der Nacht hab ich phantastische Träume. Aber wenn ish aufwach, quält mich die Angst.
Manchmal in der Nacht bin ich so hilflos und wünsch mir, es käm einer, der mich führt und beschützt.
(__/)
(O.o )
(> < ) This Is Bunny. Copy Bunny into your signature to help him on his way to world domination. (it must be bunnieeees!)

Not a real coming out of the closet thing AND I might have bragged about it before, proud as I am, but this story I really want to share here;

My sister is 13 years old, an age at which she, like most kids, is not very secure about herself or her peers and all. But at one point when 2 girls in her class were bullying another kid and calling her a lesbian several times...
My sister stepped in between the victim and the bullies and said "And what exactly would be the problem with lesbians? Mys sister happens to be one you know!" straight to their faces the little bit is SO cool, she's really not populair and usually pretty shy, but she did this calmly and without a fight or whatever. I'm so proud of her
The teacher was proud too, she was totally behind my sis on this.

Yay for my kid sister

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Manchmal in der Nacht hab ich phantastische Träume. Aber wenn ish aufwach, quält mich die Angst.
Manchmal in der Nacht bin ich so hilflos und wünsch mir, es käm einer, der mich führt und beschützt.
(__/)
(O.o )
(> < ) This Is Bunny. Copy Bunny into your signature to help him on his way to world domination. (it must be bunnieeees!)

hi im new to the kitten board
i think i'm gay but i read alot of fanfiction with lesbians in it and im always on websites like afterellen.cm and lots of fanficton websites with mainly stories with gays and lesbians to help my self feel better if i'm actually gay. and i see alot of straight couples breaking up like my parents did so i'm worried i only think im gay because i only see relationships working out with 2 people of the same sex. i know its a stupid thing to be worried about but i can't help it

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Life's a big canvas. Throw all the paint on it you can.

Welcome to the KB... I'm just gonna call you WTBF for short ^^

Anyway, You shouldn't worry about really finding a title for yourself, after all it is just a label. When you find that special someone you will know, just don't write out the options because of gender.

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Blarrrrggghhhhhhhh

tanks 4 the advise

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Life's a big canvas. Throw all the paint on it you can.

Two years ago I wrote about having a problem with coming out. I still didn't tell anyone, simply because I can't. It's hard to find open-minded friends where I live. I'm 24 years old and I can't be myself. It's getting real hard for me.




P.S. Sorry if my english is bad, but it's not my native language.

Hi, Vixen. We're here even if you can't find any open-minded friends there. Just keep yourself open.

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Menorah Tales | Working It Out | Random Bits

I’ve always been attracted to women as far back as i could remember and most of my friends and family know, even although i have only had one relationship(which was short lived and rather awful) with a woman. This really isn’t a story of coming out for me because i don’t like to label myself but i remember the feelings and my mind set when i was going to tell people and i panicked and it took me a very long time to come to terms with it, since i knew from a young age but i decided not to act on it for a very long while until i got my head sorted. Now I am comfortable with it and i have amazing support from my friends and my family and i couldn’t be happier about how things worked out.

ScottishAsh - Wow. That sounds awesome. I mean, not the relationship with the awful woman, but the family and friends. I think that there are lots of folks here who would love to have the same. How wonderful that you know who you are and are loved for it.

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Menorah Tales | Working It Out | Random Bits

Okay, so I posted awhile back (I guess that was two years ago) about telling my mom I was gay. She said she'd kick me out if I was gay. Anyway, I finally did tell her over the phone just in cse she decided to get violent. She...well, she freaked, but at least she didn't throw me out or hit me, which was better than I was expecting. Turns out she "thought she was gay" when she was my age, too. She says she's learned to cope with the feelings she has for women from time to time. So...my mom's kind of a closet case, and she thinks I should be, too. She says that this is all stuff that I should pray about and it'll go away. Sometimes I wish it were that easy.

My dad was cool with it. That didn't really surprise me, though. He's always been very gay-friendly. He's just glad that I won't be getting pregnant any time soon.

The only person that doesn't know is my grandma. Now, I love my grandma with all my heart. She's a really fun person, but I'm never telling her. Especially since the last time I talked to her, she gave me this big lecture on how lesbians are just animals who can't control their impulses and Ellen is the anti-Christ...along with Obama.

Okay, that's all.

Besides sending my huge congratz four your courahge and comming out, I gotta LoL a bit off-topic here



Uh, Sarah Palin is running for president in 2012... She looks more like a less-atractive, more-annoying Glory-hellbeast to me

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Manchmal in der Nacht hab ich phantastische Träume. Aber wenn ish aufwach, quält mich die Angst.
Manchmal in der Nacht bin ich so hilflos und wünsch mir, es käm einer, der mich führt und beschützt.
(__/)
(O.o )
(> < ) This Is Bunny. Copy Bunny into your signature to help him on his way to world domination. (it must be bunnieeees!)

This isn't exactly a coming out, but I've never spoken about my sexuality or anything very personal at work, and today my boss asked me in passing if I did anything fun over the weekend, and I said I went to the gay pride festival. She didn't seem surprised or bothered, acted like it was completely natural and said nothing about it. It felt nice.
Unfortunately, a couple hours later my head teacher in the room I work in asked me the same question, and I gave her the same response... She did a double take and repeated the word gay like it was something foul and indecent. I just kept talking like it was completely normal and I hadn't noticed her reaction, but it hurt cause I've always liked her and we work well together. I don't know if she now thinks I'm gay or not, and I don't think it will really change how she treats me (not much anyway), but it still hurt to have her act that way.

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"To days to come."
"All my love to long ago.

I hope, we'll have more happy ever after
I hope, we can all live more fearlessly...

~Jas