The Meditation Thread

[ellbogen]

Hi again everybody!

I am trying to keep up the meditation, but some days I don't manage. I have been doing it in the mornings before the alarm goes off. I have this annoying habit of waking up before the alarm - sometimes 45 minutes before, sometimes 10 minutes before. So however much that time is, that's how long I've been meditating... before the partner and pets are up and about.

Everyone I know thinks I have it really together or something, but I've been feeling really depressed lately. Some crappy stuff has happened at my job, and it's looking we're going to have to move (again!). I'm a professor and academic jobs don't grow on trees. My department is suddenly on crack or something. I got totally screwed out of a really great opportunity to get to stay at my current job (which I really like)... Long story...

So I feel like I ought to be dealing better because I'm all into meditation or whatever, but I am really down right now. The only thing that has been helping is distraction, which is unhealthy. I've been watching BtVS with my friend Jen down the street, reading fanfic, and also watching this drama-filled, lesbian-themed teen show called "South of Nowhere" that I just found out about recently. Where have I been?... Anyway, this escapist behavior isn't really helping, just distracting.

What to do when meditation doesn't even seem to do the job?? Help?

[JustSkipIt]

Well, we are on a new program of trying to get our son to sleep. It's somewhat regimented and requires that we all lay down early to try and get him to sleep. The upside is that while laying there, I can meditate. It's not the perfect situation because he may be talking or humming or whatever but it's better than nothing. My wife even said she meditated tonight too so that was awesome.

elbogen wrote:

What to do when meditation doesn't even seem to do the job?? Help?

Hmmm. That's a hard question and one that I think kind of calls for more than I can offer pithly or anything. I guess that the thing is that meditation isn't a panacea. It won't fix things or make things magically easy. Sorry, I don't mean to be pedantic. You know all that because you've been practicing for a long time. You still have a life and life still has challenges and phases. What's the first noble truth? I'm not sure it's supposed to be easy (as my week testifies). But maybe your life is a practice. Like meditation is a practice. I don't know if I'm making sense and I'm in a hurry which doesn't particularly grant your concern the respect it deserves. I'm sorry about that.

The other thing is that maybe meditation is helping. You may feel messed up or bummed or off balance but maybe all that would be even worse without your practice. Heck, without your years of practice.

I wish I had more time and wisdom but I hope this helps a little bit.

[JustSkipIt]

Boy, it's been a long time for this thread. I just finished a short sitting meditation. Let me go back though.

I've continued meditating while putting my son to bed. Sometimes I think of it as extreme meditation as I attempt to meditate while he climbs on me or sings to me. But it's a good practice. One day at work I was telling a friend that while I feel like I can meditate through obstacles, I also lose focus and get too relaxed and either fall asleep or just go into a trance. And she reminded me about the components of meditation: posture (not relevant during my bedtime meditation), intent, and focus. Since then, my focus and intent have been much better.

Tonight, my wife is trying to get our son to sleep. It has been a crazy day to say the least. We're all sick and sleep deprived and stir crazy and there's been way more upset than I like in the house. I want to be a solution to that, not a cause. I want more peace in me and in this house. I'm troubled. And the best thing I can think of, besides everyone getting healthy and rested or getting them to meditate is meditating myself. Oh, and getting to the gym would help too.

I seek peace.

Namaste.

[JustSkipIt]

I meditated Wednesday or Thursday evening of last week. I really am realizing how off-balance I am from skipping it for so long. I would like to be able to take the one seat every evening. I can’t say that my household is terribly supportive but I need to try. I can tell how in need I am by how short my temper is and how off I feel.

[JustSkipIt]

I've just finished meditating this morning. I got up early to do so because, as I said in a prior post, I can't say that the wife is all that supportive of my mediating. I took the seat 4 times this week but really only sat through 3 because my wife had said something about it. Interestingly, last night she was saying that she needs/wants to be meditating.

My session today was good but too much mind wandering to things to do and what to write and my foot is asleep and all that stuff. Still good.

Anyone else meditating these days?

[JustSkipIt]

Tonight I finished reading Hardcore Zen: Punk Rock, Monster Movies, and the Truth about Reality which elbogen (sp) recommended in this thread. I started out slowly but the last 1/3 really hit home for me. I found that in spite of the crassness of some of his language, he does in fact really define reality. And that definition becomes quite awesome. Reality is ... what is. I don't know how to explain it. He destroys (if you're not opposed to hearing it) the idea of attaining enlightenment through drugs or altered states of being. Hell, he disputes enlightenment. Because it's reality he's talking about. It's beautiful in a way that some people could read and become morose about or become more perfectly themselves.

Now I've been meditating more this week (but not as much as I'd like) but at the the end of the book, he actually gives a very short (really, really short) explanation of how he meditates (or sitting Zazen). Basically, he sits, takes a few breaths, and sits. If his mind wanders, he straightens his spine. That's it.

Well, I've always done mantra meditation but after one session of this, I could get hooked (and that's not the point either). Zazen left me so aware of how many other things get in the way of reality. The mantra takes me out of me. It is like a short cut. As is music or chimes or breath. Zazen left me very aware of the narrative voice in my head. That voice wanted to write this entry, write a blog, talk with my wife, write my next novel, assess the sitting experience, correct itself for writing/assessing, judge itself for writing/assessing/correcting, judge itself for judging and on and on. And I just sat straighter.

Whew. I mean, not to feel any drive to stand up and go "that was great" or "that was shitty" or "my leg was asleep that whole time". It just was.

Ahhh.

[ellbogen]

And 25,000 years later, I found this thread again - yay! I'm still meditating almost daily, and I started teaching a meditation class at the college where I work. Some kids and faculty are coming pretty regularly. The student services people even sent me a poor stressed-out girl as a referral. I suppose that means I'm getting a rep. I look at the class as an excuse to meditate with a group, so really they're helping me. I have had a lot of stress at work and have had a couple of cases of near burnout/meltdown. I'm assuming that it would've been way worse without the meditation practice. Any other peeps still active on this thread? If so - shoutout!

[JustSkipIt]

Hey there,
So you're teaching a class and people are coming? That's so totally fantastic. I've been meditating a few times a week. Then this week I finally hit a point where I felt like the stress is just too great in my life. I lost my wallet. Then when I got it back in the mail, I lost my wallet and phone the same day. I found all and that was all well but it's just a sign that I've got to chill.

This week I've meditated every day. My timer has stopped making noise so every day I set it and meditate and then look at it's at zero but never beeped. Tuesday I missed in the evening because it was my wife's work day and I watch the kids so I meditated Wednesday morning and evening. I'm feeling better but have to keep it up.

[ellbogen]

New timer idea: I've been using this one in the class. I turn my cellphone on silent, then use the alarm clock feature for whatever amount of time we're meditating. When it goes off, it just flashes, so it's not a jolt to anybody. I've started doing it this way at home too.

My partner sits with me on occasion. I'm trying not to 'make' her, though I wish she was into it more.... Just whenever I do, I ask if she wants to, and sometimes she does, sometimes not. I'm happy for her that she's open to it, anyway.

[JustSkipIt]

What a good idea about the cellphone timer. I tried it after you wrote and it works very well. I don't want to do it silent because I meditate with my eyes closed and don't want to have to look. But the chime is pretty quiet and I can rely on it.

I'm continuing to meditate daily, every evening. I have this group of voices in there. The first is the writing voice. It's the voice that wants to write a blog post and a post here about the experience of meditating. It named itself the writing voice. The second is the bossy voice or compassionate voice or something. That voice notices the writing voice and says "clear" or sit up and I do and the 2nd voice laughs because it's not judgmental (much) but it wants the other to be quieter.

I'm reading After the Ecstasy the Laundry by Jack Kornfield which I got for my birthday and it is very wonderful.

[JustSkipIt]

I really blew this off the last few months but one of my resolutions is to meditate consistently all year. In fact, I want to meditate at least 5x a week which will be 260 a year. So far, I've got one!

But it went like it frequently goes:

I put my son to bed and told him that I would come back in 15 minutes and if he was awake he would lose the book he had.
I get my timer and sit down and start it.
1:20 goes by...
I hear my son shouting that he needs to poop.
I stop the timer, go take him to the potty, give him 1/2 a bath, wash his pants, get him new pants and get him dressed in bed.
Go back and meditate the rest of the time.

Hey, it was meditating.

[Guest]

My father used to meditate on a daily basis when I was younger and Debra, I remember how he sometimes used the same technique that you are using with your son at the moment. It used to work not for making me fall asleep but for ensuring that there would be peace and quiet in the house since it was awe inspiring in my young eyes to just look at him meditating lol.

The reason for my posting in this thread today was because my interest was struck by the necessity for more powerful, clear thinking and a relaxed state that is evoked through meditation techniques especially for the working individual. At a deeper level, I think meditating can happen at any moment in life where there is internal silence, when the mind is able to forego its conditioning and just be itself in a pure state of bliss.

However, as conditioned human beings living in a society, we sometimes need tools for moving into that realm of inner consciousness such as timers, relaxing music, a particular mantra to recite and in a sense that creates once again a particular state of conditioning that allows one to relax completely in a meditative pose without necessarily connecting with the inner self. The positive aspect of it though is that these tools make the experience possible even though a state of transcendence is rarely reached.

I wish you both many more interesting experiences

[JustSkipIt]

Nim - lol. It's gone much better for the last 40 or so days. I've been pretty consistent, probably meditating about 5 days a week or so which is my goal. I'm bumping it up by a minute per month which isn't much but will amount to a longer session by summer. I'm feeling a lot more centered and peaceful. My wife is having a lot of hormonal issues right now (since this weekend) and I felt like I was better able to handle being there for her without rolling into it myself. I could just feel a sense of peace throughout myself. And I'm just really enjoying it.

As far as my son, for the most part he only comes out of his room if he really does need to poop and in most cases my wife is able to take him to do that while I keep meditating.

[JustSkipIt]

I'm still meditating on my schedule. I've missed a lot in the last week because we were at the farm (in-laws). But I meditated 22 times in January and 22 in February. My goal is 260 for the year so I think I'm close to on schedule.

I definitely can feel a sense of overall calmness for myself. Strangely, I also notice that I want to pray more. Prays of gratitude, prays of asking for help in being loving.

I'm bumping my time meditating up 1 minute a month. So I did 15 minutes per session in January, 16 in February, and now 17.

[nimloth]

Prajna Paramita Heart Sutra Mantra is one of the mantras we would play the most in our Natural Healing centre in Mauritius I feel so happy to have reconnected with it this morning for it is helping me ground myself firmly to my roots once again as well as reminding me of my real purpose of my new life.

Glad to share.

[JustSkipIt]

I don't know why but this morning I realized that I have not been concentrating on my breath and prayers in the past few weeks. And lo and behold, I've been feeling quite anxious and more negative than usual. I don't generally feel negative or think of myself as negative but I have had a lot of resentful thoughts lately. Then this morning it hit me that I have not been mindful.

So today, when a negative thought or anxious feeling arose in me, I breathed with it and began my mantra (The Prayer of Saint Francis). Usually I don't even say the entire prayer as the first few lines seem to center me. Something about asking G-d to make me an instrument of his peace just takes away all my ... stress I guess.

I'm so glad I remembered.

[brave-little-toaster]

Hmmm... quiet thread...
I guess I've been meditating for about a year now. During the school year, I usually meditate at least every two or three days in the mornings before the rest of the house gets up and moving, although it fell by the wayside over February break and finals for various reasons. As summer has progressed, I decided that it's insane to get up at 4:30 just to get a little quiet time when everyone is out if the house by 7 and none of my friends get up untill at least 9. So, instead, I've been doing it at night once everything calms down.
It changes from time to time, but my most common 'mantra' is a poem called 'A Prayer for Peter Pan', although I suppose that 'The Thirteenth Day' is probably a really close second. I'm not sure that I can properly explain why I use the first one, and I use the second one because I've known it since I was 10. I'm kind of a major spaz, so I usually meditate for as long as I can focus for. It usually averages out for 15 or 20 minutes, but if I do it daily I can make it to half an hour or 45 minutes.
I'm currently held inside because of the outside temperature, but as soon as the forecasted cool front brings down the night-time temp little bit I'll be back under the tree in my back yard.

[AstronSoul]

Meditation, I have been doing it my whole life. I was taught at a young age by my Wiccan Grandmother, who trained me in the Wiccan Arts on a compound off and on while my family was moving around. I find it keeps me centered, keeps me focused and my elements stay in tuned with me. I don't have a specific technique, I just have to be somewhere that I can connect to the earth.

The feel of the earth under me and sometimes I feel like it wraps me in it's arms as I relax and clear my mind. I guess you could say I have been doing it officially since I was 4 years old and I am now almost 27. A great thing to have in your life, and for me, it's some of the best times of my life.

[JustSkipIt]

Things are stressful around my house and I'm on a limited workout schedule because I've injured my heel. So I wanted to start doing a little meditation again. Honestly, I'm aiming for 5 minutes a day or so right now. I did that on Friday and then today got up a little early. Unfortunately today the cat was relentless rubbing up against me, nipping at me, meowing, etc. So... 2 minutes.

[JustSkipIt]

My family has been chanting this wonderful chanting program together most evenings. I feel so peaceful and connected when we do.

[JustSkipIt]

I meditated yesterday for 5 minutes. I feel that I am ready to start again but only trying to do 5 minutes a day so that I can succeed.

[JustSkipIt]

I have been maintaining my practice for 43/44 days now. I missed New Year's Eve. The last few days Rachel and I have meditated together which had been particularly calming.