Fic: Never The Twain

[Halcyon]

Humph....thought it was a new installment of the story....*grumble*

[Rancour]

Can't tell you what an ego boost it is reading all these lovely comments. And that the Apostate's identity still came as a surprise means I'm doing something right. Yay.

Ex-actly. No point writing fanfic if you can't have them go "what the fsck?" on occasion... ;o)

And it does rather neatly answer why Willow won't be trying that spell with Tara, doesn't it?

Well, she seemed to handle the vampire's memories during the "separation" in part 8 okay...

--Xita, I did indeed mention "long slow deep bites that last for days." And they are on their way. I promise. Cross my heart. Because SPOILER WARNING < snip > END OF SPOILER.

Eeeeeeexcellent... bring it awn!, and all that.

Rancour

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Andrea: "End-of-the-world" portents, the living dead, evil arisen?
Jane: Yep. You drive?
-- Lew, "Hellmouth in Lawndale"

[This message has been edited by Rancour (edited July 08, 2001).]

[LizzyBennet]

I hadn't been on this board before this weekend, so I got to read all of these lovely parts at once! This is such an amazing story - I am waiting with baited breath for the next installment. Keep up the fabulous work! I love your revising of the episodes, and the characters are so dead on.

Rina

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The Kitten formerly known as RinaDoll lives at http://www.geocities.com/rinad81

[Wiccagrrl]

Zahir, the Apostate's identity totally came as a surprise to me. I, too, was thinking Angel. So, gee...I guess this means Angelus is probably still stuck in some hellish demon dimention. (Torn between saying Damn and couldn't happen to a nicer fiend. Actually, if it had been Angelus sent there, he probably wouldn't have been tortured, he woulda ended up running the place)

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Tracy

Hear that Baby? You're my always.

[Zahir]

TITLE: Never The Twain? (Part 13)
AUTHOR: Zahir (zahir@brainlink.com)
FEEDBACK: You're kidding. Of course! In fact, please.
ARCHIVING: Just ask is all.
SYNOPSIS: This is an alternate history in which Willow never completed the Soul Restoration Spell. Of all the changes that flow from that one, the biggest is that Tara is a vampire. Oh, and Faith never worked for the Mayor.
COUPLES: W/T (kinda), F/L (even more kinda--you figure that one out)
RATING: PG13
SPOILERS: Up through and including "Listening to Fear," as well as some stuff from "Angel."
DISCLAIMERS: Most of the toys I'm playing with belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. I promise not to make money off them and to put them back none the worse for wear. And I have no real rights to any of the songs herein either. Oh, same thing for the authors of the songs quoted herein.
NOTE: The part of Jocelyn in my own mind is played by Gigi Edgely. For those of you who don't know, she portrays Chiana on the tv show "Farscape."

* * *

Willow gaped.

And that surprised her. She'd had plenty of experience with the strange and bizarre over the last few years. Vampires. Demons. Monsters of one stripe or another. Several would-be apocalypses. This, though...this was beyond any of that.

"Like a WUR-gin," the Thing-On-Stage crooned, "Touched for the WUR-ry first time..."

He had leathery purple skin. And a beak. The tentacles he had instead of fingers held a drink, which sported a small umbrella.

"Like WUR-ur-UR-ur-gin..."

Plus the leisure suit. That was maybe the worst part.

By an effort of will, she managed to very nearly ignore the singer. It helped to not look. She turned instead to her companions, who took in the environment with a nonchalance Willow could not but envy. Faith, the dark-haired slayer, actually seemed to be enjoying herself. Of course, some of that was probably pleasure at Willow's reaction. Wesley, the Watcher, managed to seem calm enough. So too did their companion, a handsome black man named Gunn (though Willow believed she'd caught him staring now an then). Riley had a phoney grin on his face, trying to be polite. He seemed to be succeeding, mostly.

"So, does this go on much" asked Willow?

Wesley nodded. "Pretty much."

"The place is open every night till two," added Faith.

"Okay," said Willow. She snuck a peak at the stage again. "And why do they sing karaoke again?"

Gunn pointed at the a green demon with red eyes and black horns (wearing a rather nice tangerine tuxedo) sitting at the bar. "The Host there," he explained, "he gets visions about folks when they sing. So he sets up shop in this place."

"Yes, the Caritas is neutral territory," Wesley said. "No one hurts anybody here. So its a safe place to meet."

"That makes sense," said Riley. "I guess."

"So, Red," piped up Faith, turning to Willow, "what's up with Bee? What brings you and Beefcake down to LA?"

Willow took a deep breath. "Buffy needs help..."

* * *

Tara didn't mind the sportscar. Lindsay's mild flirting with her annoyed at first, but he was smart enough to stop. What puzzled her though was why he insisted on coming to this place. It took her less than two seconds after arriving to realize he was very much in the minority--a mere human. On the other hand, he was a Lawyer. Maybe that made him an honorary monster.

He led her to a seat in a shadowed part of the bar. She lost what he was saying as her attention suddenly whipped across the room to a collection of mostly-familiar faces. One in particular.

"Tara? Are you alright?"

"I'm...fine. Just distracted a little is all."

Lindsay did a very good reassuring smile. She nearly believed it. "I understand. My jaw scraped the floor my first time." Interestingly, his own gaze did a take as he swept the room. Even more interestingly was the direction in which he reacted.

"Someone you know?" That would make for a wild coincidence.

"An almost girlfriend. Maybe a future one." He gestured towards the same table. Oh goddess. This could not be happening.

"The redhead?"

He shook his head. "Brunette. We're in an adversary situation at present, but circumstances are subject to change."

"So are you saying There's Hope?"

The smile again. She'd swear this one was genuine. Interesting. The mask does slip. "Faith, actually." With that pun (which he probably didn't know she got) Lindsay handed her a menu of songs. Although she had no plans to sing, Tara dutifully looked over the selections. It provided her the opportunity to stealthily observe Willow.

* * *

"Hi! Refresh anybody's drinks?" The waitress was just one more reason Willow had to try and not stare. As demons (demonesses?) she was cute--short blonde hair with blue highlights, pointed ears and catlike eyes. The plastic name tag read 'Jocelyn.' Odd name for a demon.

"Uh..no, thanks. Not right now."

"Check with ya later!" She actually winked as she headed back to the bar. Willow couldn't help but react as she noticed that Jocelyn had a rather long tail. It carried a bottle at roughly waist level.

Riley coughed. "Well. That's different."

"Hey, she's alright," commented Gunn. "Couple of months back we saved her from some really nasty dudes."

"You save demons?" Riley's eyebrows shot up at that one. Willow could sympathize.

"Special case," said Wesley. "Jocelyn's a half breed. As were her parents, I understand. Sunnydale tends to attract malevolent beings because of the Hellmouth, but there are many such creatures with no specific negative tendencies."

"Okay, so she's a not-evil demon?"

"Pretty much," agreed Faith. "Group of nazi-clones called the Scourge were going around hunting all the half-breeds they could find. Didn't care who got in the way. We stopped them. Then Jocelyn started working here."

Willow digested this. She shared a look with Riley. "Life in the big city," she ventured.

He shrugged. "Guess so."

Gunn lifted his beer. "Hey. Next victim is up."

Sure enough, the Host had led the scattered applause for the beaked and tentacled Madonna fan. He was now introducing the next person up--something about a newcommer to the City of Angels. Willow resolutely decided to be polite and not squirm. After all, why should all demons be evil? Were all human beings good? Of course not. So what if she hadn't met many? Giving a people a chance was the right thing to do.

Tara stepped on stage.

Willow nearly forgot to breathe.

Although a couple of dozen questions immediately came to mind, the one that bubbled up to her mind first was perhaps the strangest. Or most normal. Depended how you looked at it. What was she going to sing?

The music began. A ballad. It sounded familiar. Tara lifted the microphone and started to sing.

"Some say love, it is a river" she began, "that drowns the tender reed.
Some say love, it is a razor
that leaves your soul to bleed.
Some say love, it is a hunger,
an endless aching need.
I say love, it is a flower,
and you its only seed."

Her voice was strong yet gentle. It nearly spoke rather than sang. Yet she didn't falter, nor did her voice crack. And to Willow, each note sent an odd vibration through her.

"It's the heart afraid of breaking
that never learns to dance.
It's the dream afraid of waking
that never takes the chance."

Tara's gaze seemed fixed somewhere else. As if she sang to someone she could not see. Or was afraid to.

"It's the one who won't be taken,
who cannot seem to give,
and the soul afraid of dyin'
that never learns to live."

Dimly, Willow noticed she wasn't the only one who'd fallen silent. The entire bar was listening, intent. Yet Tara's voice wasn't really that good. Far from bad, but to gather this much attention? Could it be she wasn't the only one hearing something personal in those words? If so, didn't that mean she wasn't imagining it? The music picked up, and Tara looked at the audience for the first time.

At Willow.

"When the night has been too lonely," she sang,
"And the road has been to long,
and you think that love is only
for the lucky and the strong,"

Willow held her breath.

"Just remember in the winter
far beneath the bitter snows
lies the seed that with the sun's love
in the spring becomes the rose."

For one moment, as the music faded, there was silence. Then, a shaggy-looking man nearly seven feet tall stood up. He had long drooping ears and a snout. His red eyes gleamed. And he brought his hands together like a thunderclap, again and again. Less than a second later the entire club seemed to be joining in his applause. Willow snuck a look out the corner of his eye, saw Faith and her companions with stunned expressions joining in. Even Riley clapped his hands.

Tara was a hit. But she barely acknowledged the acolades. At her side, the behorned Host swept in, grinning and adding his own applause.

"How about that, folks? The vampire with a bleeding heart!"

She headed off the stage. Willow couldn't tell if the last look she gave the audience was aimed at her or not. But she had to admit--she was hoping it had been.

* * *

Tara paced, waiting for the Host. Lindsay hovered.

"Wow. You'd be a real treat at the office talent show. Give me a run for my money." Again, the calculated smile. Well, he was trying to recruit her, after all. Did he even know she was behind the theft of his precious prophecy? Would it matter?

At last the Host approached. "You know," he said beaming, "the undead are usually associated with bats. Keep it up, sweetheart, and they'll think of vampire along with nightingale!" It was a nice enough compliment. Were she in another mood, Tara might well have thanked him. Of course, if she were in another mood, she wouldn't have sung at all.

"So now you read my destiny, is that it?"

"That's the way it works, angel. Or should I say--fallen angel?" Silence. Then...

"Nice turn of phrase."

"I try."

"But I need to know..."

"What to do with yourself? Now that your sire is dead, no longer directing your destiny? How should you spend eternity now that his fanatical purpose no longer pushes you?"

"Yes."

The Host raised one eyebrow. "It has been written," he said with the ghost of smile.

"And that means what?"

"Your destiny. It has been written. For centuries. The second you began singing I could sense it. With the first note I saw the basics. By the time you got to the second verse I pretty much had the picture. You, my dear Tara, are a creature of legend. Even among our kind. Something of a messiah, even. And in a deeply, deeply ironic kind of way." He took this opportunity to have the waitress bring him a drink. "You see," he continued after a sip, "there's this prophecy, which you pretty much know about already. In fact, the late unlamented--although somewhat lamented, come to think of it--well, the late Apostate was indeed a figure of destiny as he suspected. The Powers That Be did indeed pull him out of hell just to create the Vampire With A Soul. But he got one little detail wrong. That creature, the Vampire With A Soul, was never meant to be him. It's you."

Lindsay did a take. Tara knew how he felt. Only she realized something.

"That's not possible."

"Wrong, doll. Its a certainty."

"I remember what it was like to be human," she insisted, "very well. So I remember what having a soul was like. And trust me, my soul isn't here. What you're looking at is a vampire. Period."

"Semi-colon, actually. And you're right as far as that goes. But you do have a soul."

Tara stepped closer to him. "If I had a soul, then I wouldn't even consider working for Wolfram and Hart. With a soul, I'd feel guilty about ripping my brother's throat out and sucking up all his blood. But I don't. Truth is, the memory of that moment makes me feel a little warm inside. Because I don't have a soul, I killed one of my lovers and turned her into a demon like me. So don't tell me I have a soul. I don't!"

"Ah, darling, you don't understand."

"She's not the only one," added Lindsay, brow furrowed and eyes piercing. He's shifted to business mode now. Oddly reassuring, that.

"Then let me explain," the Host continued. He looked directly into Tara's face. "I never said you had your original soul. Nor did I say your soul was in physical residence. But believe me--you have a soul." Every word was said with such utter calm certainty that Tara felt confused. It didn't help that the Host appeared slightly amused, as if sharing a secret joke.

Now he gestured slightly to the stage. "In fact, your soul is getting up to sing right now."

She turned. And stared. The world stopped for a moment.

Looking nervous as hell, but smiling with an unbearably cute courage, Willow was bringing the microphone up to her mouth. The music began, and after the opening riff, she began to sing. Her voice was unsteady but the determination was there and it compensated for a lot.

"Its not unusual to be loved by anyone," the red haired witch sang.

Tara had never felt so terrified. Or exhilerated. She just watched and listened to the beautiful Willow, forgetting the rest of creation for as long as the long-song lasted.

TO BE CONTINUED

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"O let my name be in the Book of Love.
If it be there, I care not of
That other book Above...
Strike it out! Or write it in anew.
But let it be in the Book of Love!"
--Omar Kyam

[Wonko]

quote:

---

Originally posted by Zahir:
"Then let me explain," the Host continued. He looked directly into Tara's face. "I never said you had your original soul. Nor did I say your soul was in physical residence. But believe me--you have a soul." Every word was said with such utter calm certainty that Tara felt confused. It didn't help that the Host appeared slightly amused, as if sharing a secret joke.

Now he gestured slightly to the stage. "In fact, your soul is getting up to sing right now."

---

Zahir....what can I say? That is brilliant beyond words. As is the rest of the chapter. Thanks

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Words from Wonko
The MKF Appreciation Society - All Miss Kitty all the Time!quote:

[Sparky]

Have I told you I really love this story?

It has so many twists and turns that there's always a surprise. Keep up the great work, as I sit patiently awaiting the next part.

I love reading Willow/Tara stories!

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-"She's my girl"

-"She's my everything"

[Kieli]

Have I mentioned that you're a genius, Zah? I can't get enough of this one. You've made me into a Fan Fic Junkie.

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"Sometimes, we just can't make it on our own. We all need someone to love us, to help remind us that there's good in the world, to keep us from going crazy."

Willow from Dacia's The Dreamer Awakes

[Halcyon]

quote:

---

Originally posted by Zahir:

Now he gestured slightly to the stage. "In fact, your soul is getting up to sing right now."

She turned. And stared. The world stopped for a moment.

Looking nervous as hell, but smiling with an unbearably cute courage, Willow was bringing the microphone up to her mouth.

---

That is absolutely my favourite part. *sigh* Tara's soul.
quote:

[CaptMurdock]

My God. When Tara sang "The Rose," I got chills. How perfect.

Zahir, I love this story. Please, more.

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"Who am I? I am Commander Susan Ivanova. Daughter of Andre and Sophie Ivanov. I am the right hand of vengeance, and the iron boot that is going to kick your sorry asses all the way back to Earth. I am the last living thing you are ever going to see. God sent me." -- Babylon 5, "Between the Darkness and the Light."

[Kalita]

Awesome chapter. Just loved it. My only query is two words:

Tom Jones?

[tommo]

Oh Zahir, that's beautiful. That Willow completes Tara entirely. Wow.

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"Tara had never felt as good about herself in her life. Willow gave her that gift. And another gift. Tara couldn't quite bring herself to call it love. Not yet. But there was time." ~ Unseen: The Burning

[xita]

Oh that was a brilliant twist on the vampire with a soul thing. Cool! More!

[This message has been edited by xita (edited March 31, 2002).]

[AngelusUK]

Awesome Zahir, I am speechless at this episode. This is fanastic, a truly awesome story. I love the vampire with a soul twist. Zahir this rocks.

More please as soon. This is a masterpiece of fanfic.

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Amber Fan
Willow "Thats fine I don't need to be snuggled"
Tara "Vixen"

[minion]

You know, I can't tell you how much I love you Zahir, or how much I look forward to each of your chapters, thank you!

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I am in thunderous agreement, oh glittering, glistening Glorificus! : Jinx in Tough Love

[fran1727]

Zahir I am sooo loving this! I'm totally addicted! And just like everyone else I can't wait for the new chapters... thank you so much!

[Wiccagrrl]

I am *so* loving this story. Tara singing the Rose- so, so right. And Willow being Tara's soul...aww.

[Sparky]

Okay I'm getting anxious now. Please don't keep us hanging.

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-"She's my girl"

-"She's my everything"

[Scout]

Yeah, I have to admit the soul thing really got to me, too. Nice touch!

More now?

[Rancour]

Now, my usual reaction to fic/tv/whatever aimed to induce an "awwww, that's beautiful" in the audience is me going "awww" promptly followed by me going toward the nearest toilet to dry retch. My reaction to this... well, I was too busy laughing from the "...what you're looking at is a vampire. Period." "Semi-colon, actually..." crack. Very nicely done, and I think about a dozen other people mentioned the whole twist on the "vamp with a soul" thing (nice escape)... as for song choice... am I the only one who'd like to see 'em sing something like "Bliss" by Tori Amos... thought so...

[Zahir]

TITLE: Never The Twain? (Part 14)
AUTHOR: Zahir (zahir@brainlink.com)
FEEDBACK: Please.
ARCHIVING: Just ask is all.
SYNOPSIS: This is an alternate history in which Willow never completed the Soul Restoration Spell. Of all the changes that flow from that one, the biggest is that Tara is a vampire. Oh, and Faith never worked for the Mayor.
COUPLES: W/T, X/Ay, B/R
RATING: PG-13
SPOILERS: Up through and including "Checkpoints," as well as some stuff from "Angel."
DISCLAIMERS: Most of the toys I'm playing with belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. I promise not to make money off them and to put them back none the worse for wear.
NOTE: The part of Jocelyn in my own mind is played by Gigi Edgely. For those of you who don't know, she portrays Chiana on the tv show "Farscape."

* * *

Willow tried, but couldn't become invisible as Giles and Buffy stared. Behind her, Riley reached out and touched her shoulder. She was grateful for the support.

"Okay," said the slayer, with deliberate patience, "why did you bring her here again?"

"The host said to."

"And this host is...?"

"He's a psychic demon who runs a karaoke bar."

They looked at her. They they looked at Riley. He nodded. "Yep."

Giles and Buffy exchanged a glance. It was Giles who spoke next. "Willow," he said, taking off his glasses, "you went to Los Angeles to recruit Faith. And you brought back..." The glance he aimed at the other side of the shoppe spoke volumes, none of them reassuring.

"You brought a demon back because another demon told you to?" Buffy wasn't blinking. Not a good sign.

"Faith and Wesley seemed to think it was a good idea," offered Riley.

Now they all looked at their visitor, all five foot four inches of her with pale blue skin, pointed ears and prehensile tail. Jocelyn's feather-like hair was taking in the Magic Shoppe like a kid in a candy factory. Catlike eyes darted from one item to the next, and then the next. Then she noticed their staring. Grinning, she approached them.

"Wow!" proclaimed the half-breed. "This place is sooooooo...wow."

"Thank you," murmured Giles.

"And you run the place?"

"In theory."

"Need some help? I'll be needing a job."

"Ah. Well. You see..." Giles put his glasses back on. Again. "Even in a shop devoted to the supernatural, the clientele have limits to what they will accept." He actually looked embarrassed.

Jocelyn didn't. "You mean the way I look," she said. Closing her eyes, she concentrated. The transformation took a little over one second. Ears changed shape. Her tail retracted (where? Willow couldn't help but wonder). The blue turned pink while the white feather-like mane became cropped blonde hair. The eyes that opened again looked a normal hazel. "What do you think?" She did a pirouette.

Giles coughed. "Impressive," he conceded.

"She's only half demon," Willow pointed out. "Like her parents."

Buffy met Giles' gaze. "I could use some help," he said "what with Anya taking care of Xander." Another great sigh. Willow relaxed. She knew what was coming. "Very well," Giles finally intoned.

Jocelyn jumped up and down.

* * *

Tara stared at Xander. He hardly seemed to notice her. Arms wrapped around knees, crouching in the over-sized chair of Anya's, he kept looking from one corner of the room to the next. It made for a weird, even fascinating pattern. "Wind," he muttered. "Wind always trying to get in." Sometimes he ranted since having so much of his mind ripped away. Other times he'd remain silent for hours, emitting little more than random words. Tonight oracle-like musings came from him, a stream of conciousness said with great purpose--although one no one could understand. "The question is why. Why trying to get in? Something they want here? Or trying to get away from something else, eh? Answer me that, if you can. But only if you know. Not suspect. Know." He started to repeat this last word over and over, in a sing song voice.

Anya loved this man. She didn't really care all that much about anything else, Tara had noticed, but she was willing to do anything for Xander. Even in this state, she refused to leave him. Refused to give in, even to moments of despair and sadness, when her own tears set off Xander's hysterical sobs.

If this happened to Willow, would I take care of her?

Yes.

But the mere thought of Willow reduced in this way terrified her. Apart from any other concern, that danger alone would have brought her back to Sunnydale. Glory was here. Banished hellgod who did...this...to her victims because she didn't belong in this reality and would go mad herself without their stolen sanity. More, Willow was here. Willow dwelt in this creature's stalking grounds, and wasn't going to leave. So neither would Tara.

Anya stepped back into the room, looking better after some sleep. She fixed her gaze on Xander, noted the lack of change, then gave a nod to Tara.

"Nothing much to report," she told the ex-demon. "He's been quiet."

"Thanks," said Anya, settling in to watch over her boyfriend. After a few moments she looked back at the vampire. "What?"

"You're not checking him for bite marks. I just wanted to thank you for that." Not waiting for a reply, Tara left the apartment. What was there to say, after all?

* * *

Willow left the Magic Shoppe late. She'd spent literally hours researching every single magical aspect of insanity she could find. It made for a daunting task. Yet, despite her tiredness, she immediately recognized the figure lurking in the shadows.

"Hello, Willow" said Tara.

"Hi." Something seemed different. What? "I thought...aren't you living in LA now? Well, not living but kinda undying? Is that the word?"

"It might be. But--no."

"Oh."

"Let me walk you home. This isn't a safe town to walk alone at night."

Left unsaid of course was the main reason Sunnydale was so dangerous--namely, vampires. Vampires like Tara herself. By most standards, this was an ironic offer at least. At worst, it was dangerously insane.

"Okay." She barely hesitated. The two of them made their way through the half-deserted streets. Neither felt any need for hurry.

"I've been thinking about that spell I did," ventured Willow after several minutes.

"Which one?"

"To have my will done? It made Faith and Buffy get engaged for an hour or two there?"

Tara smiled. Willow still felt embarassed about that incident, but the blonde vampire's smile nearly banished those feelings. She was too tired to deny that. And after all, why should she, really?

"I remember."

"You suddenly appeared. Out of nowhere."

Silence. Tara watched her. In this dim light no doubt she was getting a far better idea of Willow's expression than Willow got of hers.

"Did you ever wonder why?

"Why what?

"I mean--why you showed up? Right then? There?"

"Yes." Her voice was low saying this. For a moment, Willow felt an aching memory of the human Tara, the quiet girl she'd found irresistable in the few hours they'd shared. They were so different. Yet almost painfully similar as well. That Tara had her moments of silence as well, silences filled with meaning and possibilities.

"It...was something I said." More silence. Taking a deep breath, Willow plunged ahead. "I wished for someone who'd be there for me. Just me. No one else." She waited for a reply. Any reply.

The wait lasted nearly an entire minute. "That wish came true." Willow could barely hear her.

"Guess so."

"It still is." Those three words didn't really echo into the night, reverberating back and forth across the night sky so that all the gods and goddesses could hear. Instead, Tara spoke in the same quiet voice she had before. But to Willow, they rocked her like an earthquake. For me. Mine.

Mine.

Her reverie was broken as Tara suddenly stopped, her posture abruptly changing. With a sliding sound, she took the sabre from her back. The vampire looked ready for a fight. But Willow heard nothing. Until...there! Metal clanging against metal, again and again but in the rhythm by now very familiar. Battle. Someone was fighting. With...swords?

Both young women broke out into a run. Less that two blocks away, they followed the sounds to an alley. There, Buffy was driving away a small cluster of heavily armed man-shapes. Weirdly, each was garbed in chain mail. And each wore a mask. Buffy herself was holding her own, face twisted into a grimage of rage. Two of the armored shapes were approaching her from behind. Willow focused her will. The top of a garbage can flew into the back of one shape, making him trip and alerting Buffy to his presence. She spun around, meeting the sweep of his blade with one of her own. Borrowed, presumably, from one of the fallen Shapes.

Tara used her own sword, using less skill (or so it seemed to Willow's eye) but fortified with superhuman strength, speed and endurance. Besides, short of decapitation, a sword couldn't hurt her. And switching to her demon face had a good psychological effect--most of them took off.

All but one.

Buffy had him on the ground, sword at his throat. "Lets see what you are," she murmured. Then she yanked off his mask.

He looked--human. Not bad looking, in fact. The weird tattoo on his forehead was distracting, though.

"Who are you?" asked the Slayer.

"One of a vast army!" His eyes took in the two young women nearing, on either side of Buffy. At Tara, he actually recoiled a little. Willow realized she still wore her demon face. "It doesn't matter," he snarled, "how many allies you may have! We shall send as many as are needed! The Beast shall not prevail!"

Buffy looked at Willow. Then Willow looked at Tara, who looked at Buffy. Now Buffy noticed Tara for the first time. She looked at the two of them. Together.

"Now," she muttered under her breath, "what?"

* * *

In the end Buffy let the soldier go.

Eventually, she let Willow and Tara go as well--not without lots of explanations, though. She did agree that Sunnydale was dangerous, and yes, Tara had protected her best friend before now, but on the other hand Tara was a vampire--and so on. Buffy only backed off after Willow had put on what Tara could only call a resolve-face. At least it defeated Buffy's indignation.

Now they'd walked for another hour or more without a word. Exactly where they went wasn't clear. At least not at first. But Tara gently directed the red-haired witch. She wanted to show her something.

"So..."

"Yes?" Whatever it was, Tara didn't want to press her.

"What's it like?" She glanced nervously at Tara. "Being a vampire?"

Oh. Dear. God.

"Hard to explain." That sounded lame. Worse, it meant nothing. And worse still, it was true. "Its like--the brakes are gone. Everything is increased. Speed and strength, you know about that. But what you lose is what's most interesting."

"Your soul."

"I suppose. But what seems missing to me are all the inhibitions, the little cowardices, the self-imposed limits. Gone. And that is so very, very addictive." Willow was listening. She seemed interested. A good sign. "I think that must be what it'd be like to get drunk. Or really high on drugs. Most of us--I've noticed--get swept up in the sensation. They find the high and do everything they can to stay there."

"But you didn't."

"Oh, yes I did. The first time I killed--you can't imagine what that was like. Being born couldn't have meant more. If someone had disembowelled me, it couldn't have hurt as much. Yet a thousand orgasms couldn't match it. No other kill is ever quite like it. Not that I didn't try." She could tell this frightened Willow. But didn't terrify her.

"What changed?"

"The Apostate."

"Your sire." Tara nodded. "Is that why he took your eye?"

"He wanted to get my attention. It worked. Honestly, I'm not sure anything less...drastic...would have."

"Wow."

"Yeah."

After another eternal ten minutes, Tara stopped. With a glance, she indicated they'd reached where she was headed. Two stories of moldy bricks and boarded-up windows. She went inside. Barely hesitating, Willow followed. Tara entered through a side door, padlocked several times on the outside as well--it turned out--as inside. One stark lightbulb was the only source of illumination, showing dust and clutter. A surprising amount of time and effort had gone into creating this effect. Four carefully placed mannequins, for example, helped create an atmosphere both unsettling and profoundly abandoned.

Tara made her way to a large wardrobe. Pulling aside the door, she then pushed the mildewed clothes hanging there. One carefully placed push of her hand then revealed the ladder.

"You coming?"

Willow's eyes were huge. Not as huge as they could've been, but...big. Still, she gamely followed Tara. The ladder's rungs were steel, and built into the reinforced concrete. Down. Further down. Nearly fifty feet down.

At the bottom, Willow turned around and stared. Tara couldn't help but giggle at the shock on her face.

"Wow."

"Used to be a bomb shelter," noted Tara as she switched on the extra lights. An affectation it might be, but she was almost childishly pleased at the effect of nearly a hundred candleabra lightbulbs flickering from all over the room. Curtains hung everywhere, some of them draped over various pieces of furniture. Well, the couches hadn't matched. Besides, they were ugly. The bookcases and desk had been nice though. Now they overflowed with books.

Books Willow headed for like a vampire to blood. Her excitement grew as she scanned some of the titles.

"You...how...Tara, this library...Giles would fall in love with you!" The second she said it Willow did a take.

Tara decided to be nonchalant. Or to try, anyway. "My sire's legacy. There was no one else with any claim to his things, so..." She shrugged. "You are welcome here."

"Thank you."

"Not just to study."

Another long silence. Finally, "What about Harmony?"

"Gone. Joined a self-help group for vampires, if you can believe it. She was a mistake, anyway."

"Why did you make her?"

"Loneliness. She was pretty. Different. I got careless, took too much. So instead of letting her die, I brought her across. Do you mind if we don't talk about her?"

"Fine."

How long the silence then lasted Tara couldn't possibly have guessed. It felt like a million years. And for the first eon or so, neither she nor Willow did more than look at each other. Then, Willow took a tiny step. Forward. Not back. Closer to Tara. Then another.

Tara seized her.

Lightning fast, her hands reached out to each side of Willow's face, bringing their mouths together in one hungry movement. Somebody whimpered. Who? Did it matter? Or as long as they were at long, long last where they should be--touching, feeling each other, holding each other tight, tighter, tighter still--while this was true, what else could concern them? Details--never mind details.

When the kiss ended, it didn't, really. At least, it didn't feel so much an end as a pause. Both of them gasped. Willow had to. Tara simply did so from habit, perhaps. Now they looked at each other. Just looked.

"You're so warm," whispered Tara. "Like blood. Like life." Her voice sank, nearly inaudible. "Am I cold?"

"Cool," hushed Willow back to her. "Like a glass of water in the desert."

Their next kiss lasted even longer. As did the next. Later, neither could recall precisely when they fell to the pillowed floor--though both could not forget the feeling as limbs entwined and hands, then fingers, began to explore. It was sweet beyond words, and bittersweet because each remembered doing the same. Then, one of them had been different. Yet in some ways identical. So this dance of flesh and nervetip was all mixed up with regrets and confusions, coupled and coupling with joyous abandon. It took a lot of courage to shed their pasts along with their clothes. Yet they did it.

And they met together in pleasure more than merely physical, blinding though that part of it was.

Mine, they thought as one.

Yours.

Never again alone. Forever bound. Heat and cold. Living and undead. Mortal and hellspawn. Yet--alike in their hearts, beating or not.

Hours later, when Willow offered her throat, she felt no fear. And Tara felt no shame. She bit deeply. She drank. Her lover moaned, but did not die. Nor would she, vowed the young vampire with all the raw might of her will.

Nor would she.

TO BE CONTINUED.

------------------
"O let my name be in the Book of Love.
If it be there, I care not of
That other book Above...
Strike it out! Or write it in anew.
But let it be in the Book of Love!"
--Omar Kyam

[Corporeal Dennis]

Y'know, Zahir, sadism is really unbecoming.

[Wiccagrrl]

Wow...just, wow. Um...more please

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Tracy

Hear that Baby? You're my always.

[Rane]

i'm speechless. cant.type.a.response.yet. amazing job.

[AngelusUK]

Excellent Zahir, another awesome episode. I love this story so much it is fantastic.

More please and hurry.

------------------
Amber Fan
Willow "Thats fine I don't need to be snuggled"
Tara "Vixen"

[mollyig]

odearyme! I've been sitting here for the last 10 minutes reading, re-reading and re-re-reading! Truly excellent stuff!

------------------
"The hardest to learn is the least complicated" - Emily Saliers (Indigo Girls)

[Scout]

Lovin' the direction this story is taking. Can't wait for more!

[Halcyon]

Love the part about Tara being there just for Willow. But this next line hit me even harder.

"You're so warm," whispered Tara. "Like blood. Like life." Her voice sank, nearly inaudible. "Am I cold?"

Please HURRY....*whimper*

[This message has been edited by Halcyon (edited July 19, 2001).]

IP: Logged

tommo
Lesbian Gay Type Lover


Posts: 6184
Registered: Sep 2000 posted July 18, 2001 12:27               

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Oh god she bit her. Oh god. Wow. This is uh...um...oh god that's good.

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"She looked across at Willow, whose face was filled with light. She had never felt so calm and happy, and strong..." ~ Unseen: Door To Alternity

IP: Logged

Ashes
unregistered posted July 18, 2001 12:55              

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Very good. I love this fiction. I can't wait to read Buffy's reaction. She didn't like Tara before and I think she'll like her even less when she finds out Tara's feeding off of Willow.

IP: Logged

[This message has been edited by Halcyon (edited July 19, 2001).]IP: LoggedtommoLesbian Gay Type Lover


Posts: 6184
Registered: Sep 2000 posted July 18, 2001 12:27               

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Oh god she bit her. Oh god. Wow. This is uh...um...oh god that's good.

------------------
"She looked across at Willow, whose face was filled with light. She had never felt so calm and happy, and strong..." ~ Unseen: Door To Alternity

IP: Logged

posted July 18, 2001 12:27                Oh god she bit her. Oh god. Wow. This is uh...um...oh god that's good.

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"She looked across at Willow, whose face was filled with light. She had never felt so calm and happy, and strong..." ~ Unseen: Door To AlternityIP: LoggedAshesunregistered posted July 18, 2001 12:55              

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Very good. I love this fiction. I can't wait to read Buffy's reaction. She didn't like Tara before and I think she'll like her even less when she finds out Tara's feeding off of Willow.

IP: Logged

posted July 18, 2001 12:55               Very good. I love this fiction. I can't wait to read Buffy's reaction. She didn't like Tara before and I think she'll like her even less when she finds out Tara's feeding off of Willow.

[tommo]

Oh god she bit her. Oh god. Wow. This is uh...um...oh god that's good.

------------------
"She looked across at Willow, whose face was filled with light. She had never felt so calm and happy, and strong..." ~ Unseen: Door To Alternity

[Ashes]

Very good. I love this fiction. I can't wait to read Buffy's reaction. She didn't like Tara before and I think she'll like her even less when she finds out Tara's feeding off of Willow.