another fic

[miss_spangles]

Rane - this is great! Can I keep bothering you for more?

[Rane]

i think the internet monster ate my post! i hate it when that happens!

just a note... prologue will be written. letter from willow to tara like the challenge cause it's sucha great idea!

[Lonewolf]

Rane: Oh, that was soooooo great, I've said it before and I'll say it again, you are a Great Writer.

Lonewolf

[miss_spangles]

Excellent Rane! I'm really looking forward to that prologue!

[Rane]

oops, i meant epilogue. sorry, i'm a dork! i'm way too tired.

[miss_spangles]

Cool - I shall look forward to the epilogue then

[Dr.G]

Thank you Rane. Oh how I wish, how I wish more than anything that we will get to watch such a make up kiss on the show as well.

[emily 'first']

Rane...
Well...We've reached here,and we're sad but very happy too...A Kiss.
****
Looking forward to more Fic soon

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vive,valeque.

[karenk]

Awwww... I've been away for the past couple of days and I come back to this. This is really wonderful, Rane.

[Twisted Rabbit]

I just love this story! Thanks for writing it , Rane!

[This message has been edited by Twisted Rabbit (edited November 25, 2001).]

[Rane]

warning, like i said in the letters challenge thread i suck at writing letters. but i hope you like...

THANK you all for reading this! knowing you kittens care is great for the writing boost!

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Epilogue

Tara,

I woke up and I felt you. I felt you everywhere, Tara. In me, on me, next to me, above me, below me… But you weren’t there. I woke up and you weren’t there. Again. I’ve been keeping count. Eighteen days, and that’s including the night you spent in the hospital after…

Buffy told me what you did. How you saved me. And I know you’re rolling your big blue eyes with that little flutter that you do, but you did. You saved me, Tara, just like I knew you would. How I hoped you would. You found me this time. Ok, Buffy and Spike found me but you found me wherever it was that I was and brought me back. I felt you. I came back because of you.

I didn’t know how to stop it until I realized that you didn’t hate me. That you didn’t leave me because you hated me, it was because you loved me. When I asked him to stop it I didn’t know what I was getting into. Well, that’s a huge understatement, huh? I haven’t known for a while. I’ve been doing everything like you said. I didn’t consider my options but I wasn’t given an option this time. When I realized what was happening, what he- Tara, I’ve never been so scared in my life. It hurt more than I’ve ever imagined anything to hurt. Everything came back to me. Everything I did. Especially what I did to you. I felt that more than- And now I’m crying. I hope the tears don’t smudge up the ink. I don’t think I can write another letter.

It’s been ten minutes since my last paragraph so I’m just going to jump right in. Transitional phrases be dammed. I know I did some horrible things. I said some horrible things and I know you said you’d never forgive me for what I’ve done. I totally understand that. I don’t think I will ever forgive myself for that either. And, I certainly don’t want to forget what I’ve done. Or what I’ve been through. I know you tried to warn me, Tara, I know. Random comment, I love writing your name. It makes my fingers twirl and my lips smile. Just thinking of you makes me smile. Only bad part about that is my face still hurts.

My arm is getting very tired but I have to write to you Tara. Buffy, Dawn and even Xander give me updates about you everyday and since I can’t tell you all this face to face I have write it. I understand why you won’t pass by. I don’t hold it against you. I wouldn’t want to see me like this either. I just wanted to let you know I appreciate all the little presents you send with them. By the way, I’ve used up the face wipes. See, something so simple yet very useful. You just know, don’t you? But I do wish you’d bring the gifts yourself. But I understand. I think you understand what I mean now too.

I keep thinking about that song you sang to me in the park that day. I’ve been humming it as I lay here at Casa de Summers while they over do it with watchfulness. I know they mean well and I’m glad they are taking care of me but I need you, Tara. You’re the only one that makes all things better. Plus, Buffy can’t cook. I’m afraid that if I tell her she sucks at it she’ll break my other arm and then I won’t be able to write you at all. Over exaggerating a bit. I know.

But back to the song. The truth is Tara you make me complete. I thought I knew who I was, what love meant. But it’s you. You brought me out (no pun intended), you made me what I am today. Well, not the half invalid I am right now but you know what I mean. Ugh, I have an itch. Having a cast sucks, Tara, imagine two! Where are you now so you can rub my tummy and help me scratch. God, I miss you.

I know you don’t want to hear it (I’m hoping you do though) but I love you so much and I miss you so much and I’m SO sorry for everything I put you through. I just hope one day, in the not too distant future, we’ll run into each other (I’ll be limping I’m sure) and things won’t be so crazy anymore. We’ll both have thought about what’s happened and we’ll understand. We’ll know that it all happened for a reason and you don’t hate me. I don’t think I could live if you hated me. And I don’t need you to tell me that forgive me. Just smile at me once more. Hold my hand. Tell me that you still love me. But only if you still do. Or you could just kiss me. I’d like that better, but it’s all up to you.

Ow, I’ve got a hand cramp. And now I’m laughing like a madwoman. I don’t know whether it’s the pain or the medicine. Or maybe just thinking of you, connecting this way with you makes me so happy that I can’t help but smile and laugh. I want to hear your laugh again one day, Tara. I want to hear your voice. I want to feel your arms around me.

Always,

your Will

[This message has been edited by Rane (edited November 25, 2001).]

[RomanceJunky]

Nicely done, Rane! Great stuff!

The Junky

[emily 'first']

HeeHee...
Almost caught me by surprise that time...
But,I looked,and I did see...
****
Thank you,Rane,we have enjoyed this muchly,both of us...

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vive,valeque.

[aladdin]

so, you can't write letters??
What a big ole lie..
this is very nice and very Willow and even funny to read.
I envy people who get letters from you.

[KittyKo]

oh dear... I'm crying now. See, this is such a great fic. The letter is amazing, that's just so Willow.
And the feelings you've captured in the letter, dear gods, it's amazing. I felt like I was being drawn (sp?) to the picture, seeing Willow write, her gestures and facial expressions, her itching... hehe.. and Tara reading the letter, that made my heart go *puff*.
All ending with them meeting, once again. *sigh*
It's amazing, heart touching, Rane, thank you so much.

*hugs*

[mariacomet]

Rane,

WOW. I was waiting to give my very first registered post to someone special...er..

you know that sounds a little weirder than I intended. This was a true page turner and it had a lot of heart. Thanks for providing such a great haven during the W/T breakup arch.

[LeatherQueen]

Oooh, that was a great one Rane. I especially liked the letter at the end. I can just see Willow sitting in bed trying to write and going off on tangents about itching and belly rubs and such.

Wonderful story!

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"Honey, I'm the original one-eyed chicklet in the kingdom of the blind." -Glory

[Zahir]

Rane, I finally stole enough time to read this, and let me say I'm very impressed. I laughed, I cried...you get the deal.

But I'll admit to being a tad confused about precisely what happened at the end vis-a-vis the Warlock Menace. Somehow, I was looking for some closure on that one as well.

Anyway, thanks for this story. Deeply, and from the weary heart of one who still--for some reason--believes in Love.

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"O let my name be in the Book of Love.
If it be there, I care not of
That other book Above...
Strike it out! Or write it in anew.
But let it be in the Book of Love!"
--Omar Kyam

[littlekitty]

*picks up a box of kleenex* that *sniffle* was beutiful!*sniffle* Hip hip hooray!

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~Spread beneath my Willow tree-You make me complete~

[Puff]

Thanks Rane that was a beautiful end to a wonderful fic.

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Bloody hell, sodding, limey, shagging, knickers, bollocks...oh God...I'm English

[nika]

Rane...SIGH!

[Rane]

gosh, thanks! it's really, really cool to know something you've spent hours writing is enjoyed by others. i love it!

maria, i was wondering when you'd register! thanks for officially posting to me!

zah, there are tons of unanswered questions. typical me though. however, the whole thing with the warlock in the end, i dont see evil/bad as purely evil/bad. willow asked how she could stop it not knowing he'd basically punish her with the three fold rule (the ritual he did). i tried to touch upon that in the letter, how she felt everything coming back at her. let me know if it makes more sense now or were you asking about being more detailed in the story?

mirage emailed me some questions and comments as well. she mentioned the scene in the shop i was too easy on them and she's absolutely right. i wrote the letter so people would understand why tara acted the way she did. and like mirage said, how can you dissapoint someone that has so much faith? Willow understood that tara did this because she loved her when willow thought she hated her.

that scene with amy towards the end, when amy said she didn't hate willow and just kept being a bad influence on her, willow understood it was tara's love not hate that was the reason. or something like that. i dont knwo what i'm saying anymore! lol.

as for the letter, teehee... i'm crazy, what can i say? that's really just how i write. sometimes i even write stage directions. i'm a doof.

thank you all again for reading my fic and reading my ramble. i really, really appreciate it! hugs and besitos to all!

edited to add: I'm in love with the new banner! rock on, xita!

[This message has been edited by Rane (edited November 25, 2001).]

[ourgirlbashir]

I'm not that big on fic normally, but I really liked this. Kudos to you, Rane

ogb

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"Lazy Jane, all the time, painting lines..."

[kpmuse]

Wonderful work Rane! Thank you!

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kris

I am you know.
What?
Yours.